FabSwingers.com forum: Depression. Physical or mental or both

By *iamondsmiles. OP Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ive been doing some research lately and would like your thoughts and opinions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can be both. Chemical imbalances and/ or real life situations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never been depressed i dont think i just get down a bit rage then it blows over and i just man up and get on with stuff

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Generally divided into chemical or situational depression.

Given the brain is a physical organ, presumably the mental is physical anyway?

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By *ondonFreakMan
over a year ago

London

"i just man up and get on with stuff "

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"i just man up and get on with stuff

Agreed.

Depression is an illness, it isn't weakness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i just man up and get on with stuff

"
here il pick em up and roll em back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never been depressed i dont think i just get down a bit rage then it blows over and i just man up and get on with stuff "

No you obviously have never been depressed or you would know that saying man up is very insulting to the people that have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A total lack of understanding.

Man up eh. .... i hope you never get depressed Lord!

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By *ondonFreakMan
over a year ago

London

"i just man up and get on with stuff

here il pick em up and roll em back

I wouldn't have thought you'd ever been that helpful in your life after that statement, so dont put yourself out, I`ll pick em up myself ta..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i just man up and get on with stuff

Agreed.

Depression is an illness, it isn't weakness. "

Sorry but that's like saying pull yourself together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got a neurological disorder that effects my mobility I guess this means my physical state depresses me but this then leads on to being mentally depressed because I can't physically do what I used to...

Try and put a positive spin on life otherwise could spiral out of control

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never been depressed i dont think i just get down a bit rage then it blows over and i just man up and get on with stuff

No you obviously have never been depressed or you would know that saying man up is very insulting to the people that have."

It's said a lot. It's rarely meant nastily. Lost count of how many times people have said just cheer up it'll be fine. Hard for some to understand because everyone has trauma in their life... Not everyone has depression though.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"i just man up and get on with stuff

Agreed.

Depression is an illness, it isn't weakness.

Sorry but that's like saying pull yourself together.

I'm not sure where we disagree?

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

Mainly chemical imbalance in my opinion although grief can be a major contributor. Understanding the subconscious feelings that trigger depression can help to deal with it in some instances

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

I've had depression since I was 13 and been on antidepressants since then. I've had a diagnosis of another illness that links into and can cause depression. However, some situations I entered into due to the depression when I was younger have contributed to the diagnosis I received.

Depression isn't a 'man up' kind of thing, if I could get rid of it I would but it really isn't that easy. I missed alot of school due to it, have struggled with college, jobs etc, it can take over everything. Luckily I'm now better than I've ever been, I'm on medication that works for me and I finally got the hysterectomy I so desperately needed.

As for OP's question, it can be both physical and mental, I have a chemical imbalance but also things that have happened have contributed to my issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Physical and mental health are intrinsically linked. Depression can cause physical symptoms and physically poor health can cause mental symptoms.

I believe some people are biologically wired to be more prone to depression and it occurs as part of their make up. I think some people suffer trauma and can have it afterwards.

I also think a very small percentage of people just also lack resilience and can’t see to problem solve and change situations.

I think it’s real but I don’t always think medication is the answer for everyone. I think when you’re not biologically imbalanced, or in the midst of trauma that depression can be short lived and improved by many other changes. I don’t think it’s helpful ( not saying that anyone’s doing this) to tell people to think positive as if they could, they probably would do

- Mrs

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

[Removed by poster at 26/09/19 15:27:59]

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By *ondonFreakMan
over a year ago

London

"i just man up and get on with stuff

Agreed.

Depression is an illness, it isn't weakness.

Sorry but that's like saying pull yourself together.

I'm not sure where we disagree? "

I misread what you wrote first time too, then I realised what you meant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i just man up and get on with stuff

here il pick em up and roll em back

I wouldn't have thought you'd ever been that helpful in your life after that statement, so dont put yourself out, I`ll pick em up myself ta.."
self reliance and independence good on ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately I've had a long old battle with depression, but mostly because not very nice things have happened. Joining fab is my attempt to turn that around and create more positive situations, although I don't live by fab. It would just be nice to meet likeminded people. If that makes sense lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it’s a mixture of both, I know that the mental part of it also affects the physical. Lack of energy, motivation to get active and a general exhaustion that leaves me physically drained. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it’s a mixture of both, I know that the mental part of it also affects the physical. Lack of energy, motivation to get active and a general exhaustion that leaves me physically drained. X "

Completely feel ya on that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think it's both.

I'm trying to convince myself I'm not slipping again but I think I really might be.

I'm flat as a pancake, know in my head I'm amazing but feeling emotionally like I'm worthless to a degree.

Situation definitely comes into it, as does the fact I lost my beloved pooch on Monday, however I've been blue for a while now though.

I've realised today that I'm isolating myself and part of that is fear. I'm not scared people won't like me or anything like that, in fact it's the complete opposite.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think it's both.

I'm trying to convince myself I'm not slipping again but I think I really might be.

I'm flat as a pancake, know in my head I'm amazing but feeling emotionally like I'm worthless to a degree.

Situation definitely comes into it, as does the fact I lost my beloved pooch on Monday, however I've been blue for a while now though.

I've realised today that I'm isolating myself and part of that is fear. I'm not scared people won't like me or anything like that, in fact it's the complete opposite.

Sending you a hug x

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Before it cascades into a bun fight on what is depression or indeed, certain comments upsetting each other.

Depression has many faces, some mild and some severe, it’s a very big encompassing umbrella word covering people being “down” right through to the more extreme “ending of life thoughts”.

We’ve all probably dealt with one or more of these in our life at some point.

Some can self help “man up”, some need extra help, it really does all depend on each individual’s circumstances.

So don’t be quick to judge someone’s comments as not right, as it was probably right for them and how they dealt with it.

Read the below and remember everyone is different and will deal with things differently

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/d/depression

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Before it cascades into a bun fight on what is depression or indeed, certain comments upsetting each other.

Depression has many faces, some mild and some severe, it’s a very big encompassing umbrella word covering people being “down” right through to the more extreme “ending of life thoughts”.

We’ve all probably dealt with one or more of these in our life at some point.

Some can self help “man up”, some need extra help, it really does all depend on each individual’s circumstances.

So don’t be quick to judge someone’s comments as not right, as it was probably right for them and how they dealt with it.

Read the below and remember everyone is different and will deal with things differently

https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/a-to-z/d/depression"

Hear hear! Depression is a horrible to go through in any form, I've always said I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Hugs all round for all of you who have had to deal with this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think it's both.

I'm trying to convince myself I'm not slipping again but I think I really might be.

I'm flat as a pancake, know in my head I'm amazing but feeling emotionally like I'm worthless to a degree.

Situation definitely comes into it, as does the fact I lost my beloved pooch on Monday, however I've been blue for a while now though.

I've realised today that I'm isolating myself and part of that is fear. I'm not scared people won't like me or anything like that, in fact it's the complete opposite.

"
you are the only girl i know who could trump in a hurricane and we know whodunit

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

"Think it's both.

I'm trying to convince myself I'm not slipping again but I think I really might be.

I'm flat as a pancake, know in my head I'm amazing but feeling emotionally like I'm worthless to a degree.

Situation definitely comes into it, as does the fact I lost my beloved pooch on Monday, however I've been blue for a while now though.

I've realised today that I'm isolating myself and part of that is fear. I'm not scared people won't like me or anything like that, in fact it's the complete opposite.

I do that x

You’ve recognised it so you’re back in charge x

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem

"Never been depressed i dont think i just get down a bit rage then it blows over and i just man up and get on with stuff

No you obviously have never been depressed or you would know that saying man up is very insulting to the people that have.

The term man up is saying you're being weak be a MAN.

To live with depression and other mental health difficulties is no easy task. Every day a struggle, an inner battle, a war raging inside your own head. It's not a sign of weakness

It's a sign of being strong for too long, some battles can't be won but they still fight them.

Men get told to man up if they show emotions not deemed a manly quality. It's rude and disrespectful even hurtful.

Odds are one day everyone will experience some sort of mental health condition living in this day and age. Over worked, solitary living disengaging with those around you. The UK has high rate of mental health problems, and lack of supportive services and suitable service.

You know some things people say they think they are being supportive really doesn't help at all.

Man up, learn to love yourself, learn to enjoy your own company, go do this go do that, it isn't as bad as it seems, tomorrow's another day, other people have it worse.

Dont try to minimise their pain, don't try to invalidate their suffering. Dont make them feel even more less of a worthy person. Dont make them feel guilty for feeling the way they do.

It takes the ability to reach out but it needs to have someone there to take that hand when they do for it to work. Humans are social creatures and these days everyone passes the book, no one cares. So think precisely before you say something, how would you feel it said to you in a position of vulnerability.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"Ive been doing some research lately and would like your thoughts and opinions"

My thought is what it would be like to eat some jelly and ice cream off your foo-foo and if it would make you laugh. Or if just seeing my cock would give you hysterics. My opinion is when there’s a trough, a peak always follows. Up and down like riding my cowgirl style

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well said Nyx,

We don’t tell people to try a bit harder to just create insulin, or walk off their broken leg. Compassion goes a long way. assuming because you’ve not experienced it that it’s solved simply isn’t very kind. - Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok so here goes...

So I always saw depression as a sign of weakness, a millennial bug that people cry for sympathy... for 6 years ive struggled at times, ive kept ive had real low points but always kept that cloud away by keeping myself over busy, whether it be work or hobbies, constant holidaying ect Everyone sees me as the party animal, successful, always smiling, always ontop of the world, i thought i was just in a badmood.

Little did they know for the past year 'life' has got ontop of me, ive woke up nearly every morning in tears. The last 6 month have been hell and ive been close to taking my life on numerous occasions, most recently in june.

My manager unbeknown to me went through depression 10 years ago and kept having meetings with me for the past 6 weeks just chatting ect... i ended up in tears time after time as soon as he said 'are you ok'

He took me for a drive 2 weeks ago and took me to the doctors as i kept saying yes ive been or I'll go but didnt, if he hadnt im not sure if today id be writing this as i just wanted out.. wanted the paint to end.

I dont know whats been causing it which is frustrating as i have no worries. The doctor seems to believe i have a inbalance which should rectify its self, im on medication 'citlopram' its helped so so much im more flat lined now and not quite myself atall but i feel stable, my sex drive has plummeted, my interest in most things has been lost.. but thats small fry as i feel so much better and i know the negatives arnt permanent.

Its taken so much to talk about this let alone type it up for the world being a strong headed guy but i didnt want to be a statistic...

talk to someone

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"Think it's both.

I'm trying to convince myself I'm not slipping again but I think I really might be.

I'm flat as a pancake, know in my head I'm amazing but feeling emotionally like I'm worthless to a degree.

Situation definitely comes into it, as does the fact I lost my beloved pooch on Monday, however I've been blue for a while now though.

I've realised today that I'm isolating myself and part of that is fear. I'm not scared people won't like me or anything like that, in fact it's the complete opposite.

I do that x

You’ve recognised it so you’re back in charge x"

This ^ is a huge step... recognising it yourself and taking control xx

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

It took me 22 years to come to terms with my depression. I remember feeling the same way that I do now when I was in year 2. Only now I have anxiety as well. Go team me

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By *he Devils Daughter!Woman
over a year ago

some where in yorkshire

"A total lack of understanding.

Man up eh. .... i hope you never get depressed Lord! "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been on meds since I was about 23/24 , life was going well so the end of last year I stupidly took myself off them , big mistake ending up with a breakdown and me nearly not being around! Now my meds are stable but now and again I can feel myself slipping but as said above recognising you struggling or others seeing it in you is definitely the key to getting back on track for me x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok so here goes...

Its taken so much to talk about this let alone type it up for the world being a strong headed guy but i didnt want to be a statistic...

talk to someone"

Your manager is so cool to do that for you. Glad you're starting to feel better. X

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Ok so here goes...

Its taken so much to talk about this let alone type it up for the world being a strong headed guy but i didnt want to be a statistic...

talk to someone"

Well done for saying.

You are lucky to have such a caring boss, hope you have a good network of friends around also.

We have both struggled

Not wanting to go into it right now as I could talk all day.

Hope you recover soon

Jo x

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"Ive been doing some research lately and would like your thoughts and opinions"

Both , the endocrine system is both and is vastly involved in our well or not so wellbeing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it so hard sometimes. And sometimes I have it easy.

I just try to keep myself to myself, and be nice to everyone. I always think, I don’t know what’s really going on in that person’s head.

Good luck to anyone who is reading this thread cos they’re silently struggling. X

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By *sJay76Man
over a year ago

Minehead

Really could of done without reading this thread right now, especially comments from uneducated people who have perfect lives and are too macho to have 'depression/anxiety'.

It doesn't have to be a huge issue to trigger these feelings inside of us, sometimes it's the little things that hurt the most, things that are out of our control.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's a bit of both but much more mental.

My mind hasn't been in a good place for awhile and I've been feeling depressed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Phrases like "man up and get over it" are why men don't seek help when they need it and the most likely to commit suicide. If someone puts their trust in you enough to confide then it's a honour that shouldn't be taken lightly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankyou for the kind words. All i can honestly say to anyone struggling (especially men who feel they cant speak out) please speak to someone it helps dont suffer in silence. Its not weak to speak.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Phrases like "man up and get over it" are why men don't seek help when they need it and the most likely to commit suicide. If someone puts their trust in you enough to confide then it's a honour that shouldn't be taken lightly"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thankyou for the kind words. All i can honestly say to anyone struggling (especially men who feel they cant speak out) please speak to someone it helps dont suffer in silence. Its not weak to speak."

In my area the NHS Talkworks service is available,for mental health support. I'd certainly say that just letting someone else know how you're feeling,even if that doesn't involve taking the issues apart,is important enough to be worth doing.

I struggle with this, periodically. I always viewed it as a weakness in myself - although not in other people,which is obviously hypocritical,but that's down to having unrealistically high expectations of myself. Which I, unsurprisingly, fail to meet,which leads to disappointment. Aaaaand round we go again..!

Makes me even more unattractive (repeatedly got scored 0 on a recent Hot or Not 0-10 scale thread on here, woohoo! Nothing if not consistent,hey? ) to some,I'm sure.

Tell someone. A Doctor is a really good place to start. They don't judge.

Hoop

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/09/19 19:45:20]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I could alienate every woman on here by being honest but what's the point in lying. My whole life I was mentally abused by my father. I have suffered from zero confidence and zero self esteem for a long time. I was put down and made to feel worthless basically my whole life. After my mum died six years ago I did distance myself from him and was doing ok ish but 3 and a half years ago I ended up caring for him as his health went down hill and the mental abuse started again until he passed away last October. A lovely couple I met back in march who are now two of my best friends have given me my confidence back. They made me realise that I'm not worthless that I do matter.now the bit that will put the ladies off.I'm ashamed to say I had never had a girlfriend until earlier this year and I am very inexperienced. I have now had some experience and think I have a little bit of a kinky side,tried spanking,giving oral and pegging!! Currently chatting and met a lovely couple on here and they know everything and have been very understanding. Just hope the ladies don't hold my inexperience against me as I'm a pretty decent guy when you get to know me. A confident lady who would lead the way would probably be my best hope but I understand that most of you lovely ladies want a guy that knows what he's doing. Anyway that's me warts and all."

I think you’re very brave and loyal

You certainly didn’t have to go back to your father after the way he treated you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you’re very brave and loyal

You certainly didn’t have to go back to your father after the way he treated you x"

Thank you.

I am now anti depressant free for the first time in almost 30 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lost a very good friend, I just couldn't reach him. Sad, very sad.

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By *hesecretdocMan
over a year ago

Lancashire

What an uplifting thread to read. So many people talking openly. Very brave, but it all helps change attitudes!

All those who have been so brave talking about their struggles have my admiration!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me at times the hardest part is understanding how I am feeling and then being able to explain to others.

When people ask "how am i" and i reply "ok" sometimes they ask for more detail - which i may not be in the mood for explaining or more likely not able to- hence mostly just reply "surviving" and close friends know i will talk more if i need to

often wish at times it was more physical as i think it is easier for others to understand and accept

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem

I personally hate those types of threads on here people rating others, drink kiss avoid bollocks and the like.

Some people can be quite cruel without thinking. Thinking it's all fun but how is rating anyone less than a 10 or not the best outcome nice for anyone. It's not fun and games it can destroy a person's self-esteem, as with everything in life the bad always weighs more than the good. A compliment can make someone rise but it's only slight, whereas a negative can make their world come crashing down. A person can be told 20 positive things about them but then 1 negative comment will play over and over again and not even think about the 20 good things.

I think those voting/opinion threads should be banned.

Should see how many guys get slapped down in the chatrooms for trying to rate women on cams thinking if they can get the guys to vote that it's appreciated and then the women would want to meet them being grateful for the attention. Women don't partake in rating of cocks usually no matter how many times they get asked, these guys just to boost their egos and destroy self-esteem in others.

So people dont put up with it in the chatrooms so why would it be acceptable in the forums?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 26/09/19 19:45:20]"

Dude! That's the bravest thing I've ever seen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Removed by poster at 26/09/19 19:45:20]

Dude! That's the bravest thing I've ever seen.

Wasn't trying to be brave but pointless not being honest as when it comes to a meet the lady would soon find out I was inexperienced and lying just makes the situation worse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sadness is real. Depression is darkness and fear. Irrational but persistent.

Lennon's 'Yer blues' sumed it up perfectly. A catharsis to kick the demon out of your head.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

L has mental health issues from her childhood but it come back with anger after some health problems were diagnosed, it spiralled down a slippery slope causing her to be in extreme pain and falling over because her legs would simply give way on her. It's been hard getting her out of it and highly addictive pain killers are a result of it. Physical and mental problems can have a frightening effect when put together.

I'm glad to say now she is on the right medication her head has got better and her mobility has increased incredibly although the depression is likely to be there for life as her health conditions worsen.

Sex is the only time she feels completely pain free so I think that deserves to have DR at the end or my name right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"L has mental health issues from her childhood but it come back with anger after some health problems were diagnosed, it spiralled down a slippery slope causing her to be in extreme pain and falling over because her legs would simply give way on her. It's been hard getting her out of it and highly addictive pain killers are a result of it. Physical and mental problems can have a frightening effect when put together.

Sex is the only time she feels completely pain free so I think that deserves to have DR at the end or my name right?

She's lucky to have you mate I mean Doctor

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By *r SxxMan
over a year ago

ashford

I just spent ages writing a huge post, with feelings...... And accidentally pulled the screen down and refreshed the page

I just wanted a record that I had written something and my time wasn't wasted haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a thread x i had to go private recently to see a psychiatrist and after just 20 minutes he said I've diagnosed you as having a split personality and then says that will be 200 quid x i said well here's 100 quid from me get the other 100 off the other guy

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

We don't have a separated mind and body, so it's natural for changes to one aspect of us to have influence throughout.

We can be affected by our lifestyles, chronic issues including stress, have impacts.

The chemical imbalance type theory has some supporting evidence but it's not conclusive. Hence Serotonin and other neurotransmitter deficits may not be the cause.

My gut feel is that depression may have a variety of contributory factors/causes, leading to a range of types. Earlier drives for simplistic theories, backed by medicine for treatment, may have pushed us too readily towards accepting over-simplistic theories, without great evidence

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

It's like having a black hole inside you that sucks out all the happy times and just Leeves you with nothing but bad times.

The feeling of being in a dark tunnel with no ending in site.

The feeling that everyone else seems to get what thay want but you.

The feeling that you got a 10 tun wate on your hed and a sense that life is completely pointless and you are worthless.

A sence that Everything you do no matter what you do it's going to fale.....

And in the darkest of it all you got that little voice that pops up when near something dangerous saying go on nobody will miss you, I dout anyone will even notice. Just end it, end all the pain.

Yes

I've had very bad depression.

But thanks to a couple of friends I got out of it.

Thow sometimes I fell it lurking around in hard times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just spent ages writing a huge post, with feelings...... And accidentally pulled the screen down and refreshed the page

I just wanted a record that I had written something and my time wasn't wasted haha"

I do that quite often. Aarrgghhhh I feel your pain!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ive been doing some research lately and would like your thoughts and opinions"

Both...my depression was triggered by post traumatic stress, but is now a physical problem so i will need antidepressants for life.

Been signed off for the last 6 weeks as currently struggling. It's difficult when hubby works away Monday to Friday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've suffered from depression and I've been to dark places, friends family and partners wouldn't have a clue what you're going through. There's times where I've even had really dark thoughts (if you know what I mean) but I'm still here and even though I'm not 100% I'm still fighting and not letting it get the better of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've suffered from depression and I've been to dark places, friends family and partners wouldn't have a clue what you're going through. There's times where I've even had really dark thoughts (if you know what I mean) but I'm still here and even though I'm not 100% I'm still fighting and not letting it get the better of me "

I have just gotten over a few weeks of that...hate myself for the thoughts i had. Just need to draw a line and start again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all have it I have for the last two years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have suffered for about 20 years now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have suffered for about 20 years now "

I just think of me family and friends they always make me smile xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have suffered for about 20 years now

I just think of me family and friends they always make me smile xx"

My own mother wanted to call social services on me and have my girls taken away...so can't really think about all family. Hubby is and always will be my knight in shining armour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have suffered for about 20 years now

I just think of me family and friends they always make me smile xx

My own mother wanted to call social services on me and have my girls taken away...so can't really think about all family. Hubby is and always will be my knight in shining armour

Nice you have your husband some one to talk too.

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK

The short answer from me here is both.

My diabetes was out of control when I was going through my own mental illness.

My depression was more deep rooted and longer established than I thought and brought to a head by a perfect storm in a job I was doing where circumstances made me feel ill, undermined, alone and I lost confidence.

I had a really difficult conversation with my doctor - the hardest I've ever had with anyone in my life and checked in with my localmental health team who then booked me on a six week course which allowed me to think positively and understand and recognise (for me) where things started.

Turns out depression has always been a part of my make up. The workplace I was in at the time was the trigger but there were a few unresolved issues I had, and faced, and I feel at peace in that regard.

I left the job, went pretty selfish (for me) over a number of months, regained my confidence and overall, the last 10 months, I've since had some of the best experiences.

I know that my depression still lurks and not every day is a picnic, but I largely feel in control.

Apologies for the long post.

Talking really helped and I need to thank my friends, family, doctors, professionals and even people on here for doing threads like this. Even a very nice lady listened who later went unlos.

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