FabSwingers.com forum: Alternative uses for an 18inch Dildo....

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You have an 18inch Dildo apart from the obvious what else could you use it to do?

I suggest a draft excluder

What do you suggest?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rolling pin

Dog chew toy

Baseball bat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Door stop

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Cosh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Prime Minister?

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By *axo25Man
over a year ago

lightwater

I could use it as a splint when I start to droop...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Horse shoe flinging target

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

A weapon of destruction

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By *akes handymanMan
over a year ago

In the Lakes

Putting holes in doughnuts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To stir your soup?

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By *rtraymondo76Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

[Removed by poster at 25/09/19 23:10:32]

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By *mralphyjMan
over a year ago

Fantasy Land

Curtain rail

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By *rtraymondo76Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Prime Minister?"

Would be too intelligent for that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rolling pin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fence post

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Back scratcher???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fly swat or spider whacker?

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

If use it as a door answering prop to make people fuck off who shouldn't be knocking at your door.....

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By *hisCharManMan
over a year ago

South Manchester

To fly a flag at Glastonbury in front of the Pyramid Stage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A measuring implement.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

In some parts of Yorkshire it would be accepted as a significant other!

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By *ilver_StarMan
over a year ago

Oxford

Light Sabre

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Weird (and somewhat awkward looking) alien species in a really cheap horror or Sci-fi movie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it has a sucker you could just slap it onto someone's head when they're being a dickhead.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"If use it as a door answering prop to make people fuck off who shouldn't be knocking at your door.....

You’re my kind of man....

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

Artillery mortars.

Rubber bullet's bigger brother.

As seen in the Belfast branch of Anne Summers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If it has a sucker you could just slap it onto someone's head when they're being a dickhead. "

Haha best one yet, imagine doing it out in public. Someone being a dick, reach into bag, dickhead you are!

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

To hold my bracelets

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Dalek arm

Hammer

Extended prod for when you just can't reach something

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to do security and it would make a good cosh!!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Croquet peg

One of those things you throw horseshoes at

Rounders bat

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By *il FiskMan
over a year ago

sefton

Drain cleaner, sure beats Mr muscle!

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

A dibber for the garden.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stick it to the tiles in the shower and hang your scrunchy body scrubber off it. Just don't poke yourself in the eye with it, that would leave a shiner

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

"If use it as a door answering prop to make people fuck off who shouldn't be knocking at your door.....

You’re my kind of man...."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hairband holder. Always losing those fuckers.

Oh my goodness, I've got the perfect idea.

Core out the top centre.

Insert candle.

As the wax melts it will dribble down the sides.

Yeah baby, that's what I'm talking about!

I may have to purchase one just for that reason.

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By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

"You have an 18inch Dildo apart from the obvious what else could you use it to do?

I suggest a draft excluder

What do you suggest? "

Its too short for a draft excluder.

Unless you have very narrow doors.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

at work, as an alternative pointer during Powerpoint presentations

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By *Jones19Man
over a year ago

Evesham, Worcester, Pershore

I could use it's as a replacement knee at this rate.

Core it,put some lights in it, and you have a nice mood light (assuming its translucent)

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By *ustbelfastMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Fence post?

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By *akes handymanMan
over a year ago

In the Lakes

Use it instead of a sky remote as a comparison of size!!!!

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By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago

Sunderland

If it has a sucker I’d hang my bags over it

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By *unkym34Man
over a year ago

London

I’d put on a cape and go crime fighting with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mate Dave he’s a thick as one and definitely been a nob today

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By *uciyassMan
over a year ago

sheffield

If I had an 18 inch dildo I’d be running off to a quite room to use it as god intended.

However I believe it would also be helpful with the current state of parking wars outside schools. What better way to move an illegal Parker on by slamming an 18 inch dildo down on their bonnet and then wiggling it at them mouthing “ park somewhere else you cunt”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prime Minister?

Would be too intelligent for that."

Thought we had a massive cock for a pm already.

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

You might as well shove it up your arse for all the use it is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I had an 18 inch dildo I’d be running off to a quite room to use it as god intended.

If I end up in jail

It will be your fault

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By *uciyassMan
over a year ago

sheffield

"If I had an 18 inch dildo I’d be running off to a quite room to use it as god intended.

If I end up in jail

It will be your fault"

Don’t worry I’ll smuggle some Maltessers and wine up me bum for you

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By *orenzoVonMatterhornMan
over a year ago

Lincoln

It would be useful for tour guides to stand out from the sea of umbrellas

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By *gentlegiant66Man
over a year ago

Kettering

Leader of the opposition....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stick it on top of the car so you can find the car in a crowded car park

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stick it on top of the car so you can find the car in a crowded car park "

Oh my god this is the best one yet!

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

Stick the sucker end on a Spacehopper then bounce around Tesco wearing flares

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I hit someone with it pleaaassseeeeeeee

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

Give to your dog as a chew toy, then leave it outside the shops, saliva dribbling down the toy's glans.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Weapon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pepper grinder

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It could replace one of the probes on a Daleks helmet.

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

Soup stirer....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prime Minister?"

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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago

Merseyside

fetch stick for the dog

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

Just walk around with it over your shoulder, don't say anything about it, just pretend it's a perfectly normal accessory.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Table ornament for a dinner party.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prime Minister?"

Oh my God

It'd be more use than that floppy haired posh piss kidney

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stick it to your head and pretend to be a teletubby.

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