FabSwingers.com forum: Attached?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

When we first started swinging hubby and I decided only to meet people once or twice, so no one would get feelings or attached to anyone else.

Now we have been on sites for almost 4 years and have met people more than the twice max we first agreed!

Opps first rule broken lol

Now my reason for this thread was to ask if anyone has become attached to someone who was only meant to be a playmate?

If so how did you deal with it??

I have to say it hasnt happened to me I was just wondering if it does happen, other than the couples who get together as singles and end up living together which I do know happens and I say at least you dont have to explain your sexual prefrences to them if they already know you swing!!

Shona

x x x

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By *im53Man
over a year ago

Boldon

i think it is how frequently you see them not how many times that will start an atraction going

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Good point hun I never thought of that.

Shona

x x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think it depends on how you view the word attached. i myself like to get to know ppl and like them, so in a way that is attached, but doenst mean i want to run off with them. you can like someone , love their company, but again doesnt mean your in love with them. i think its all about enjoyment with someone who enjoys the same things as you.......... go with the flow i say, have fun and even make friends along the way, but its always my hubby who keeps me warm in bed at night and is there for me when i need him. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i think it is how frequently you see them not how many times that will start an atraction going"

This is it pretty much I think. If you are round theirs or they round yours nearly every day then bonds will be built for some.

Thankfully I can only play weekends so I avoid this by proxy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I love my playmate to bits, but I am not in love with him.

We have been playing together for a long time on a regular basis and are great friends too.

I think it depends on what kind of person you are and if you are in a relationship yourself and indeed what kind of relationship you have.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have asked myself that question, and do not know the answer yet, and shall cross that bridge when I reach it.

I only have one confirmed playmate so far, and he and I have a very good understanding that we meet for recreational fun, no more, no less

It helps that we live quite a distance away, and have very busy lives.

So perhaps I should look for similar playmates, who are not local, so that the chances of frequent meets are not on the card, thereby, reducing the chances of forming emotional attachments etc...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Do people not get attached to people they think of as friends? Isn't that what a friend is?

I can feel attached in some way to people I see once in a blue moon...because we click and get on really well. I can feel no attachment to people I see 3 days on the trot (damn good sex though!)and then let them fizzle away without a second thought.

Feeling attached (or connected) with someone means bob diddly squat to me. I have in the past become attached to people I work with (and I don't even fuck them).

I can't see a problem with connecting with people through friendships.

I do see a problem when it's not getting attached but it is getting Obsessive, possessive, controlling, jealous or anything which leads to a lack of openness and honesty between those involved.

I can fuck my friends (good friends - close friends) and not expect them to "put a ring on it"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess its a little bit different if yr single, i met Richy off here, was only meant to be a "meet" but i fell for him big time and him me..

And 3 months later we are still together

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

We still see the first couple we ever swapped with and thats 4 years ago. As a four we have become good friends and just pick up where we left off. It can be weeks between meets or even months, doesn't seem to matter. Also got other friends from the scene some longer than others,but as for attachment? nah not gonna happen we tend to meet couples who are in very secure long term relationships who like us are just looking for a bit of extra fun, not a replacement partner.

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By *cotscple4funCouple
over a year ago

lanarkshire

we have known a cple for over ten years didnt no each other were swingers until five yrs ago we have swapped a good few times we still go out in bigger companies with friends who dont no we have also went to socials together but came home seperatley lol so we r attached as friends but that is about all p.s the two wifes even worked together as manageress and assistant manageress

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"Now my reason for this thread was to ask if anyone has become attached to someone who was only meant to be a playmate?"

We haven't meet enough members to become attached to anyone, no one seems interested in us

How sad is that?

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

im sure you will get there guys xx

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"im sure you will get there guys xx"

aww, thx for the support ff

We've started doing the lottery, we might have more luck

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

quality is better than quantity guys, its more important to find the right person

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

"quality is better than quantity guys, its more important to find the right person

You're right, we'll get there

Eventually

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

" perhaps I should look for similar playmates, who are not local, so that the chances of frequent meets are not on the card, thereby, reducing the chances of forming emotional attachments etc... "

Sounds like a terrible idea!

Seriously, you don't want top miss out on any emotionally stable people just because they' re coveneient? Mind you "sorry, you're too near" isn't one I've seen before...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you for your comments they reinforced what I already thought:

If you want to meet people you will become attached because they will become friends.

Ol & Kid I want a share of your lotery winnings lol

In all honesty like many think you just havent found the right people to meet yet but if I can find people who want to meet me you will also find them its just a matter of whittling thru the browse section - still say you should move up here beside me!!

Shona

x x x

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

Hey Shona, you sexy moma

"still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey Shona, you sexy moma

still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

Hey no fair no resisting!!

Shona

x x x

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Hey Shona, you sexy moma

still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

Hey no fair no resisting!!

Shona

x x x "

I'm still waiting at Gretna Green for your flamin address! xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey Shona, you sexy moma

still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

Hey no fair no resisting!!

Shona

x x x

I'm still waiting at Gretna Green for your flamin address! xxxx"

Your shagnav must be really pish hun if it cant even find Kennoway!!!

Did you remember to get the correct visas??

Shona

x x x

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Hey Shona, you sexy moma

still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

Hey no fair no resisting!!

Shona

x x x

I'm still waiting at Gretna Green for your flamin address! xxxx

Your shagnav must be really pish hun if it cant even find Kennoway!!!

Did you remember to get the correct visas??

Shona

x x x "

Hey if I can get a visa to visit Suffolk I can certainly get one to visit Scotland

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hey Shona, you sexy moma

still say you should move up here beside me!!

At least I'm able to resist you being dwon here

Hey no fair no resisting!!

Shona

x x x

I'm still waiting at Gretna Green for your flamin address! xxxx

Your shagnav must be really pish hun if it cant even find Kennoway!!!

Did you remember to get the correct visas??

Shona

x x x

Hey if I can get a visa to visit Suffolk I can certainly get one to visit Scotland

Well hurry up the kettle just boiled!!

Shona

x x x

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