FabSwingers.com forum: Impress me.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lap dance?

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

Pour you a glass of your favourite tipple...and....Cook you some of my damn fine splendid food....if I do say so myself!!!

.....brunch on the go as we speak...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A lap dance?

Oooh la la

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Pour you a glass of your favourite tipple...and....Cook you some of my damn fine splendid food....if I do say so myself!!!

.....brunch on the go as we speak...

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

A massage to work on those tense muscles

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"A lap dance?

I was going to say the same thing although it may put you off.

I have a professionally-choreographed routine which could be performed for an individual. I have all the moves and you'd see how much effort I put in to entertaining and lavishing attention on you purely for your pleasure.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A massage to work on those tense muscles

They are tense! I just chopped loads of veg, that was hard work.

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

Breakfast in bed and I'll do the laundry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "
my hands are bigger than yours let me take over please

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A lap dance?

I was going to say the same thing although it may put you off.

Does it resemble Napoleon Dynamite's dance? That would REALLY impress me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't phone one stranger to make him cum and this happens...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Breakfast in bed and I'll do the laundry."

Perfect! There's a load on but can you hang it up and then put the winter duvet in to wash? I need it, it's cold at night.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would hire a flash mob to do a bit of uptown funk for you as we enjoyed a coffee on the high street.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? my hands are bigger than yours let me take over please

Take over what?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't phone one stranger to make him cum and this happens... "

Poor Ronny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would hire a flash mob to do a bit of uptown funk for you as we enjoyed a coffee on the high street.

Yes! Will they be in costumes? Singing dancing dogs would amaze me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't phone one stranger to make him cum and this happens...

Poor Ronny

Probably purple ronny by now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? my hands are bigger than yours let me take over please

Take over what?

"
omg your avatar lol but you can't see it i suppose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would hire a flash mob to do a bit of uptown funk for you as we enjoyed a coffee on the high street.

Yes! Will they be in costumes? Singing dancing dogs would amaze me. "

The whole 9 yards

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"A lap dance?

I was going to say the same thing although it may put you off.

Does it resemble Napoleon Dynamite's dance? That would REALLY impress me. "

I'm not that skinny. You'd have to try it to find out and you can tell me. I don't want to give away my trade secrets in advance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't phone one stranger to make him cum and this happens...

Poor Ronny

Probably purple ronny by now "

Oh the ironny.

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently. "

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Breakfast in bed and I'll do the laundry.

Perfect! There's a load on but can you hang it up and then put the winter duvet in to wash? I need it, it's cold at night. "

Yes, m'lady, could I also interest you in a hot cocoa with marshmallows on these cold nights of yours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? my hands are bigger than yours let me take over please

Take over what?

omg your avatar lol but you can't see it i suppose

Oh I see. No, I tend to look at other people's

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Breakfast in bed and I'll do the laundry.

Perfect! There's a load on but can you hang it up and then put the winter duvet in to wash? I need it, it's cold at night.

Yes, m'lady, could I also interest you in a hot cocoa with marshmallows on these cold nights of yours."

Yes please! Could you tuck me in and turn out the light please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Nah, that's a lot of effort. Will just send you some porn links.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

swap it for a nice Brisket of Beef?? Or a Pork lion fillet??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu? "

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy "

I'm not, just look at my other half

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nah, that's a lot of effort. Will just send you some porn links."

Fisting?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

Can I have it all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An all over oiled sensual massage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy

I'm not, just look at my other half

That's low, I'm not phoning strangers and getting them off

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

swap it for a nice Brisket of Beef?? Or a Pork lion fillet??

Awkward. I don't like meat.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake "

Fish

The cake sounds interesting though!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"An all over oiled sensual massage

Hot oil? I'm cold.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy

I'm not, just look at my other half

That's low, I'm not phoning strangers and getting them off"

You never do anything for me

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By * Plus ECouple
over a year ago

The South

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

We'd like to make a Rubi sandwich and do all sorts of "the stuff" with you, nice and slow.

No hasty pudding......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy

I'm not, just look at my other half

That's low, I'm not phoning strangers and getting them off

You never do anything for me

Let me read my verification and se if that's true

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

We'd like to make a Rubi sandwich and do all sorts of "the stuff" with you, nice and slow.

No hasty pudding......

OK but no other fillings, I don't want to smell of ham and cheese.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What will you cook me? I'm super fussy apparently.

So, I'm going with my tried and tested herb crusted rack of lamb, with some salt, pepper & paprika tossed/roasted potatoes, with some honey roasted parsnips and some garlic buttered asparagus tips!!

I don't like lamb

Apparently she's not super fussy

I'm not, just look at my other half

That's low, I'm not phoning strangers and getting them off

You never do anything for me

Let me read my verification and se if that's true"

Damn it, I should've played it cool!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake

Fisting

The cake sounds interesting though! "

Oh.. I thought you were a fan!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

Send you some of my finest ‘work’ after trawling the site!

Or sing to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"An all over oiled sensual massage

Hot oil? I'm cold. "

Hand warmed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake

Fisting

The cake sounds interesting though!

Oh.. I thought you were a fan! "

No that's Meli!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Send you some of my finest ‘work’ after trawling the site!

Or sing to you.

Both please! If you could sing about your findings that would be great!

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

Can I have it all?

Oooooh OK xx

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Nah, that's a lot of effort. Will just send you some porn links.

Fisting? "

No, it's becoming a bit stale now. We need to find something else... hmmm.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nah, that's a lot of effort. Will just send you some porn links.

Fisting?

No, it's becoming a bit stale now. We need to find something else... hmmm."

Challenge accepted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd whisk you off to New York for pizza in the park...oh....hang on...you're already there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nah, that's a lot of effort. Will just send you some porn links.

Fisting?

No, it's becoming a bit stale now. We need to find something else... hmmm."

The vid of the girl filling her bum hole with milk and cereal and enjoying her lovely breakfast?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake

Fisting

The cake sounds interesting though!

Oh.. I thought you were a fan!

No that's Meli! "

Cake it is then, still puzzling over that you’d want for main!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'd whisk you off to New York for pizza in the park...oh....hang on...you're already there

What kinda pizza!?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d invite you to take a seat at my chefs table for a 5 course tasting menu

What's on the menu?

- Selection of Canapés

- Broccoli and Blue Cheese soup with chive marscapone and warm garlic bread

- Sea Bass with basil and pine nut sweet veggie sauce with rosemary sautéed potatoes

- Crouching tiger, hidden zebra cake

Fisting

The cake sounds interesting though!

Oh.. I thought you were a fan!

No that's Meli!

Cake it is then, still puzzling over that you’d want for main!

More cake?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would help you pack a case and would whisk you of somewhere hot and exotic, all the time there i would pamper you and tend to your every whim x

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

If Rubi doesn’t want it I’ll have it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would help you pack a case and would whisk you of somewhere hot and exotic, all the time there i would pamper you and tend to your every whim x"

I'm Scottish though, I'll burn to a crisp!

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By *reckledbumWoman
over a year ago

Blackpool

A kiss.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

If Rubi doesn’t want it I’ll have it

You can share

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A kiss.

Luckily I just brushed my teeth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!! "

ice cream , candyfloss

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss "

My sweet tooth is tingling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss "

I could dance alongside you x

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

If Rubi doesn’t want it I’ll have it

You can share

I’m good at sharing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss

I could dance alongside you x"

Yes! We'll swap your dildo maracas for castanets since we're by the beach

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss

I could dance alongside you x"
oh come along we could go to the penny arcade or try the hook a duck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would help you pack a case and would whisk you of somewhere hot and exotic, all the time there i would pamper you and tend to your every whim x

I'm Scottish though, I'll burn to a crisp! "

Then part of my task would be to ensure you have sun tan lotion applied at all times, trust me i wouldnt mind x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss

I could dance alongside you x oh come along we could go to the penny arcade or try the hook a duck

Yes

I’ll do Kate Bush style this time x

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

I'm feeling really low too.

Jo.Xx

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By * Plus ECouple
over a year ago

The South

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

We'd like to make a Rubi sandwich and do all sorts of "the stuff" with you, nice and slow.

No hasty pudding......

OK but no other fillings, I don't want to smell of ham and cheese. "

Deal!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Malteesers and a splendid walk on llandudno pier

they have fresh dohnuts

Winner!! Fresh donuts are where it's at!!

ice cream , candyfloss

I could dance alongside you x oh come along we could go to the penny arcade or try the hook a duck

Yes

I’ll do Kate Bush style this time x"

I'll sing babushka to you, I've been practicing my wailing recently.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Jumping through hoops for a relationship is sooo two months ago for me, if you can't amuse yourself or on occasion impress me then I'm not sure I can be bothered :p

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jumping through hoops for a relationship is sooo two months ago for me, if you can't amuse yourself or on occasion impress me then I'm not sure I can be bothered :p"

I impress him all the time! It should be a 2 way thing!

(don't tell him this but he impresses me every day just being himself).

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

Pour you a vodka martini and rather than offer you it 'shaken or stirred' i would stir it with my dick

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

"I'll bake you my Lemon drizzle cake accompanied by a few glasses of my cherry Bakewell gin

Failing that, I'll shake my tits in your face

If Rubi doesn’t want it I’ll have it

You can share

I'll bake extra xx

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Breakfast in bed and I'll do the laundry.

Perfect! There's a load on but can you hang it up and then put the winter duvet in to wash? I need it, it's cold at night.

Yes, m'lady, could I also interest you in a hot cocoa with marshmallows on these cold nights of yours.

Yes please! Could you tuck me in and turn out the light please? "

As you wish.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Pour you a vodka martini and rather than offer you it 'shaken or stirred' i would stir it with my dick"

I hope you've washed it?

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

Pour you a vodka martini and rather than offer you it 'shaken or stirred' i would stir it with my dick

I hope you've washed it?

Always clean and available to be 'stirred'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha"

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Jumping through hoops for a relationship is sooo two months ago for me, if you can't amuse yourself or on occasion impress me then I'm not sure I can be bothered :p

I impress him all the time! It should be a 2 way thing!

(don't tell him this but he impresses me every day just being himself). "

It should be indeed!

That's a really sweet thing to read actually :D

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

You sniff it first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tie you up put you in a box tie a bow round it and deliver you to the guy you refer to

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

You sniff it first. "

I can't remember, the arm is in cast, it's why opening the van doors is difficult to do!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tie you up put you in a box tie a bow round it and deliver you to the guy you refer to

On your bus?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

You sniff it first.

I can't remember, the arm is in cast, it's why opening the van doors is difficult to do!

I'll hold it

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Flowers and a box of chocolates?

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

You sniff it first.

I can't remember, the arm is in cast, it's why opening the van doors is difficult to do!

I'll hold it

You will, oh wait, is that before or after the chloroform?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Flowers and a box of chocolates?"

I love flowers and we can share the chocolates over a cuppa and a chat

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it?

I would ask you to hold my shopping due to my arm being in plaster, then ask you to sniff this hanky

Feeling mischievous today, your getting it haha

I've got a cold, I'll be OK

Chloroform is good for that, honest, just sniff the hanky and afterwards you won't have a cold!

Would I lie to you?

You sniff it first.

I can't remember, the arm is in cast, it's why opening the van doors is difficult to do!

I'll hold it

You will, oh wait, is that before or after the chloroform?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That got creepy

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"I'm feeling very underwhelmed by a certain man's lack of effort today. I need to be wow'd.

How would you do it? "

I would play you Rachmaninov's G minor Prelude. Everybody's impressed by that.

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

[Removed by poster at 14/09/19 16:30:40]

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Flowers and a box of chocolates?

I love flowers and we can share the chocolates over a cuppa and a chat

Absolutely we can

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"That got creepy "

It depends if you know the film or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tie you up put you in a box tie a bow round it and deliver you to the guy you refer to

On your bus? "
yodel ok ?

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