FabSwingers.com forum: Do women message men first ?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok so everyone knows that men massively out number women so I have always wondered why more women don’t message guys first ? This would make the whole thing a little more exiting for people like me who never get an inbox first from a woman .

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?

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By *hezuMan
over a year ago

East London

Yeah they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, they message folk they’re interested in

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By *ouis CyphreMan
over a year ago

The Midlands

They sure do

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

Glad we resolved that

Next thread

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

Yes, they do! If a woman is interested in you, she'll get in touch, simples

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Some women don't feel the need to, others want to and do so OP.

There aren't that many women on here, yes. GM normally has some wise words about taking away some men who do something and the numbers even out.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I have done. I must have had my big girl pants on that day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course we do, when the recipient is hot enough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah, they message folk they’re interested in

What she said ^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep iv had to block em there doing my nut in i keep having to say they cannot have my penis

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always message if I am seriously want to arrange a meet...

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

I can honestly say I never have......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok so everyone knows that men massively out number women so I have always wondered why more women don’t message guys first ? This would make the whole thing a little more exiting for people like me who never get an inbox first from a woman .

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"
i never send first messages

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Seems like I’m not quite hot enough then ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Occasionally xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can honestly say I never have......

Not even a wink....?

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

Yep, I have and will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seems like I’m not quite hot enough then ?? "
its the dick pic its off putting for many women

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"I can honestly say I never have......

Not even a wink....? "

No....not even a wink,

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"Seems like I’m not quite hot enough then ?? its the dick pic its off putting for many women

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do. When I'm active. I never really reply to messages so most of my meets are instigated by me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d change the profile pic op

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can honestly say I never have......

Not even a wink....?

No....not even a wink, "

Shit, did I message you first in the olden days then? I thought I was cooler than that....

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"I can honestly say I never have......

Not even a wink....?

No....not even a wink,

Shit, did I message you first in the olden days then? I thought I was cooler than that....

You did kid.....that was a long time ago....before you got all loved up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very rarely in my experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well depends on how much they fancy you!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok I’ve took on board feedback about my pictures so I have made some changes . More pics to come soon

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

If a guys text and pictures draw me in and gives me something to work with, then yes I will messages first.

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Yes they do.

Sometimes it's easier to look for who you want than to wait for them to contact you.

Jo x

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By *ndrew CareyMan
over a year ago

Peterborough, Cambridgeshire & Lincolnshire

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

Yes they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can honestly say I never have......

Not even a wink....?

No....not even a wink,

Shit, did I message you first in the olden days then? I thought I was cooler than that....

You did kid.....that was a long time ago....before you got all loved up

I am kinda loved up, away from fab. I think you missed an issue of the fab news a few months ago on the demise of snx my lovely

Can't believe I cracked on the messaging mind, smh..... Xx

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By *omeotherknobheadMan
over a year ago

morecambe

yes.

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I've sent first messages. Mainly from forum threads x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oooo i smell a carcrash

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By *carlettVanillaWoman
over a year ago

Gloucesterish

I do. But honestly not that often. I tend to decide from the ones that message me more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We message men first if we are interested x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes all the time

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

And relax.....like I said I don't think I ever have ....

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

I'll often pop someone a message to compliment them if there's a picture I like or something within that picture or profile. But its not sex related.

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I have done.

And I will again.

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes all the time "

I wish you’d message me 1st, you’re stunning!!!!

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Of course they do, I have had a few delightful Ladies pop a message in my box and it much appreciated.

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

Yeah, I think they do, I've had a couple of first messages from women....

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I do if I really like the look of someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not many do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

False alarm ffs

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"False alarm ffs

Was just about pop some corn to....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, this isn't bumble

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

I do if someone sparks my interest

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Women do indeed message first, though most of the time I don't mind being proactive and taking the initiative

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had 2 or 3 women message me first. All led to nothing too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better innit

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I've messaged first a couple of times.

And yes, it was worth the couple of minutes it took to send the message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do if someone sparks my interest "
Lovely underwear

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I do if someone really grabs my attention, though mostly I get enough interesting messages that I can just respond to them rather than looking for people.

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By *opsy71Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

Well I did, once

But the guy was that aloof with his replies I thought fuck it won't be doing that again in a hurry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do get women messaging me first, its usually to remind me of the restraining order but still counts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And relax.....like I said I don't think I ever have ....

Hahaha, I just broke you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No women on any site message me first

thats how I know when I'm on a fake dating site, I get loads of messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id say no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Part of a couple but i do sometimes message first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had women message me first but they've lived really far away

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Rarely, but yes.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I have done before.

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By *heGateKeeperMan
over a year ago

Stratford

More often than we think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i rarely do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes they do and always a plesant surprise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have done before."

What catches your good eye lol

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

"If a guys text and pictures draw me in and gives me something to work with, then yes I will messages first. "

Bare in mind most men's profiles are either shockingly poor or they are so closed that they don't even give you an opener! So men take a look at your own and have a think

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"If a guys text and pictures draw me in and gives me something to work with, then yes I will messages first.

Bare in mind most men's profiles are either shockingly poor or they are so closed that they don't even give you an opener! So men take a look at your own and have a think

Yes, this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

Couples also lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It does happens but only when Jupiter is aligned with the blue moon over New Zealand

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

"If a guys text and pictures draw me in and gives me something to work with, then yes I will messages first.

Bare in mind most men's profiles are either shockingly poor or they are so closed that they don't even give you an opener! So men take a look at your own and have a think

.....glad I'm not one of the most then.....

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"It does happens but only when Jupiter is aligned with the blue moon over New Zealand

That's specifically what I waited for to message you first. The timing of me mocking you for being in trouble was entirely a coincidence of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I like being chased

I think i have done maybe couple of times as they were outside my normal age range. And surprise, surprise none of these worked out!

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By *urvyandCurious999Woman
over a year ago

Hiding from twats

Very occasionally. But I kind of assume that if a man is interested then he'll send a message first. I don't like to do the chasing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not good at messaging first..i know i should but i just feel awkward about it...

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By *_91Man
over a year ago

manchester

I’d be happy with a reply..never mind a message out of the blue

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

They do. And when it happens it’s lovely.

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By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton

"They do. And when it happens it’s lovely. "

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

Nope never

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you could be on to something here... And it would certainly rule out the pestering women complain of so much if the women had to message the men first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you could be on to something here... And it would certainly rule out the pestering women complain of so much if the women had to message the men first "

If that happen , might as well close account, as never had first message from a female, plus when your fat with ginger beard ha ha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you could be on to something here... And it would certainly rule out the pestering women complain of so much if the women had to message the men first

If that happen , might as well close account, as never had first message from a female, plus when your fat with ginger beard ha ha "

Everyone has a type dude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think women are very few online.. Or I'm just not shagable lol. In over five months of being here, I've only recieved one message first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you could be on to something here... And it would certainly rule out the pestering women complain of so much if the women had to message the men first

If that happen , might as well close account, as never had first message from a female, plus when your fat with ginger beard ha ha "

Don't put yourself down, you're hot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you could be on to something here... And it would certainly rule out the pestering women complain of so much if the women had to message the men first

If that happen , might as well close account, as never had first message from a female, plus when your fat with ginger beard ha ha

Everyone has a type dude "

Totally agree I am what I am, I know am great guy , but what I ment was , I do enjoy chatting to female on here so if they had to message first couldn’t, I’ve had some great crack on here , oh and conned once pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do get women messaging me first, its usually to remind me of the restraining order but still counts."

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I just don’t think i’m the type of gal a fella on here would welcome a message from. So i don’t.

That way i’m not dissapointed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just don’t think i’m the type of gal a fella on here would welcome a message from. So i don’t.

That way i’m not dissapointed."

Why what type of girl are you lol,

Any fella on here would be chuffe to get a first message from lady as just don’t happen often,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just don’t think i’m the type of gal a fella on here would welcome a message from. So i don’t.

That way i’m not dissapointed.

Why what type of girl are you lol,

Any fella on here would be chuffe to get a first message from lady as just don’t happen often, "

Exactly it's exciting to get a message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just don’t think i’m the type of gal a fella on here would welcome a message from. So i don’t.

That way i’m not dissapointed.

Why what type of girl are you lol,

Any fella on here would be chuffe to get a first message from lady as just don’t happen often,

Exactly it's exciting to get a message. "

See rest my case!! And little confidence boost

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I don't.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"I’d be happy with a reply..never mind a message out of the blue

Oh stop being so needy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d be happy with a reply..never mind a message out of the blue

Oh stop being so needy

Ha ha as if you don’t get replied to,

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By *urls and DressesWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near here

I’ve sent a message first twice

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By *entonMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire

"I just don’t think i’m the type of gal a fella on here would welcome a message from. So i don’t.

That way i’m not dissapointed."
aye ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start

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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago

Hull

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start "

Lost count to be honest!

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By *igg13Man
over a year ago

They're like rocking horse shit. Haha!

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

I message anyone if I have something to say to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I message anyone if I have something to say to them."

And even if piss off put nice way it’s appreciated!!’

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By *r_Jake70Man
over a year ago

London

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start "

I get more messages from women than I send. About 6-8 in the last couple of weeks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start

I get more messages from women than I send. About 6-8 in the last couple of weeks. "

Then you my friend are one lucky man!

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By *r_Jake70Man
over a year ago

London

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start

I get more messages from women than I send. About 6-8 in the last couple of weeks. "

I’ve just counted. 10 in the last 3 weeks. Mostly from forum users.

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

I just have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start

I get more messages from women than I send. About 6-8 in the last couple of weeks.

You wanna rewrite my profile and photo shop pictures lol

I’ve just counted. 10 in the last 3 weeks. Mostly from forum users. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

Ye I message guys first sometimes

If I'm interested I message - why wouldn't ya?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes but only on Fridays

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By *appytochatMan
over a year ago

Deep in the New Forest

Yep I've had first contact messages from women. How many of them really are women I couldn't tell you. But the ones I've carried on chatting with have all turned out to be real so cant complain

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"I message anyone if I have something to say to them.

And even if piss off put nice way it’s appreciated!!’ "

I did not understand much of this, sorry.

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

I did on this thread he didn't reply...

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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago

A box at end of your bed

"Seems like I’m not quite hot enough then ?? "

You and me both op

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes but depends on the size of their vaginas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I did on this thread he didn't reply...

"
well you're superwoman

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

"I did on this thread he didn't reply...

well you're superwoman

Lol..damn right I am..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I message first, sometimes because I like a photo or their profile but manly because I'd like to meet them.

Have met a few after I sent the first message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I message first, sometimes because I like a photo or their profile but manly because I'd like to meet them.

Have met a few after I sent the first message. "
now that's what i call a figure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I did on this thread he didn't reply...

well you're superwoman

Lol..damn right I am..

"
you can have everything you need except krypton

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can honestly say I never have......

You should

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Used to when I had a single profile before I met Mr. Not always to meet for sex, as some have been too far away, but some have amazing profiles so send a compliment xx

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By *MattyMan
over a year ago

Naked coffee house near you - Wiltshire - Swindon

Some do some don;t, just like us men don;t message every females/couple on here its whether you catch their eye

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

I've been messaged first about forum related nonsense.

Never had a potential meet-related first message from a woman.

For balance, I rarely send first messages either.

It kind of evens out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

never its unheard of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have done once or twice if i see a status thats funny in my updates, i will message them, other than that no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve only had one woman message 1st to be fair

C’mon ladies break the unwritten rules

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve only had one woman message 1st to be fair

C’mon ladies break the unwritten rules

Yea he is rather phwooar

(Did i just say that....ooopsy )

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

What makes you send a message to someone.

Pictures, profile text, common interests?

Some ladies are proactive and use the search facility and initiate contact.. I've always thought this sensible as they (like me ) know far better what it is they seek than the description words on a screen provide.

Those that don't search themselves may or may not find what they seek in their box.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very rarely tbh

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Big thanks to everyone for your replies the feedback has helped a lot .

Also a big thanks to the very kind few who messaged me much appreciated.

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By *ibblingnewtWoman
over a year ago

by the sea

Yes men should always wait patiently until they receive the elusive message from a female here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes men should always wait patiently until they receive the elusive message from a female here."

I think that seems to be a sensible advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had very few tbh! I just think they are so inundated with messages that there is no time to search.

I think it’s hard to see the wood through the trees. There’s plenty of metaphors in that one haha !

It’s just my view, do tell me if I’m wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes men should always wait patiently until they receive the elusive message from a female here."

Still waiting

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

Struggle to message a guy first because their profiles are appalling!!!!

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"Struggle to message a guy first because their profiles are appalling!!!!"

It's not gender specific, ladies and couples can have appaling profiles as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seems like I’m not quite hot enough then ?? "

+1...!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just never have the time to be honest. I go through the last 100 to view and wink if there is someone there I find interesting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Struggle to message a guy first because their profiles are appalling!!!!"
we cant all be sue barker sue barker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The confident ones do and why not if you want you go get.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a few message me first. Always a massive boost when it happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok gents let’s take a poll list the number of messages you have received off a lady since you been on here......

Big 0 to start "

1 apart from some who didn't agree with me in a forum, but one first message.

Most have been from ladies to tell me they're not interested after I messaged them.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Ye I've messaged a few guys on here first. I don't have an issue with it to be honest.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

I do!! If someone catches my eye....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is not a moan just an observation . In the spirit of the post title . Years on the scene we have never been received message initiated by female . Hey ho lol

Yes and their may be many reasons for that so guys your not alone lol

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Very few will text first unless they already met or he’s absolutely a God ...old school values I suppose

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

I have done and will do again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have done and will do again "

Sex pest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh yes I do.. quite often.

It's good to be able to do the "choice" myself

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

"I have done and will do again

Sex pest

Hahahaha you love it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have done and will do again

Sex pest

Hahahaha you love it

No comment

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

I’ve had a few couples chat

And lots of interest from the guys

Always wondered is there really that few women on here ?"

Yes indeed they do x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"No"

Erm

The question was

Do ladies message men

Not

Do ladies message you

So there is only one answer , yes ladies do message men , you are totally wrong with no

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"I do!! If someone catches my eye.... "

*pulls on goalkeepers gloves....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Very few will text first unless they already met or he’s absolutely a God ...old school values I suppose

A God? Talk about exaggeration;-)

But just wanted to say for me it is a bit about old school values, quite right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes sometimes I message other women on here. I mostly always get a reply even if it doesn't evolve into a meet. Feel sorry for men on here lol.

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"Very few will text first unless they already met or he’s absolutely a God ...old school values I suppose

A God? Talk about exaggeration;-)

But just wanted to say for me it is a bit about old school values, quite right. "

I dont really like the concepts behind some old school values

I like to treat humans fairly and equally

I see a woman as my equal , no power games and expect her to be similar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks to everyone for the replies you have all been very helpful .

Hopefully my profile is a little more attractive now .

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By *oldenskyWoman
over a year ago

london

I’m guilty of sending a message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women never message me first I am a acquired taste

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