FabSwingers.com forum: Out of my league!!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There are several people/couples on here that I would love for D and I to meet but would never say anything as I think they’re way out of our league! Does anyone do the same or do you think fuck it and just go for it?

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

My league are the odd and interesting - no power differentials there.

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By *agicroundabout3100Couple
over a year ago

Camberley

Just go for it, as long as you meet the age profile and description of people they are looking for.

You lose nothing by sending a polite message expressing an interest.

Good luck xx

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

Why of your league?

Based on what?

Better to just find out rather than to just go along not knowing?

Or is out better to just think they're out of whatever league you have yourself in rather than the actually knowing?

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By *W ChapMan
over a year ago

Swindon

Of course....depends how I'm feeling, most of the time I avoid the people I think are out of my league, but sometimes I just give it a go but expect the worst.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

[Removed by poster at 27/08/19 09:18:51]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont believe in such a thing as league's.

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

"[League Removed by poster at 27/08/19 09:18:51]"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go for it!

I've been very surprised to get favourable reactions when punching well above my weight; you never know, and have nothing to lose!

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"There are several people/couples on here that I would love for D and I to meet but would never say anything as I think they’re way out of our league! Does anyone do the same or do you think fuck it and just go for it?"

Fuck it and go for it, what's the worse that can happen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just go for it, as long as you meet the age profile and description of people they are looking for.

You lose nothing by sending a polite message expressing an interest.

Good luck xx"

Precisely.

Someone who you think is out of your league may actually be interested in you.

Don't ask, don't get

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By *inkysexpotMan
over a year ago

leeds

I sometimes think the same, write out a well thought out message and end up deleting it and just admire from a distance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont believe in such a thing as league's."

This

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

There are no leagues. Just try and see what happens.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think people should go for who they're interested in.

In other news, I'm a massive hypocrite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people may look at you and you are out of there league too. You will never know unless you make contact. Worse case they ignore you or reject you. Either way you never know until you try.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I don't believe in 'leagues'

I like people, personalities.

Some of the best looking people I know are boring buggers.

I'd take someone who can make me laugh over a hot body anyday

And you don't know if they can do that until you chat.. So nothing to lose by messaging someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes i always feel like this

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

What league would that be?......if anyone on here thinks their on a league above, their clearly diluded.......send whoever a msg go from there....it will be either yes or no .....have more confidence in yourselves as a couple that can bring something to the table for anybody ....good luck sweet

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I don't believe in leagues as such but I did avoid messaging people who I thought were too attractive/intelligent/interesting to be interested in me. That was more of a reflection of how little I thought of myself rather than an accurate view of the person.

Now I think fuck it and message them anyway. Through a few recent experiences I've changed my mind about how I view myself. No one is attractive to everyone and actually, I'm not too shabby. I'm cute and quite intelligent and fun to be around and yes, I'm fat but I'm curvy as well.

Confidence *is* sexy and when I have a slight wobble I try and remember that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t subscribe to leagues - there are those who are attracted to me and those that aren’t. If those I’m attracted to don’t feel the same way - c’est la vie

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Them damn leagues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No we don’t believe in leagues, if you spend your life thinking people are better than you or above you it’s always going to hold you back . If there’s people you like just chat to them you really have nothing to lose .

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

Do you get kicked out the league if you can't demonstrate financial viability and can't fulfill fixtures?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think it's important not to put too much stock in what people "out of your league" think of you. That's a nasty ego dent waiting to happen. Be yourself, do what makes you happy, don't rely on unknown quantities for any part of your confidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just go and say hello guys on here have to do it all the time and get turned down. They will be interested or decline so whats stopping you.

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

I know my place, virtually every one is out of my league.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck it and go for it. What's the worst that could happen? A stranger ignores you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know my place, virtually every one is out of my league."

Above or Below ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just go with it if it's no then move on maybe you will be surprised

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Yes all the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I think they're out of my league they probably are and I just leave them be.

No point messaging because most times they'll just delete without reading

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I've thought this lots on here but now I just go for it! Nothing to lose and a lot to gain

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

Totally agree with Rubi...

But...

I also think to that we/people shouldn't think like that....we are all excellent people no one is any better than anyone else...okay some may be supposedly better looking etc....but its what you can bring to the table so to speak....be confident in that!!!

If they don't want you....it is more likely to be their loss in all fairness!!!

I know my good and bad points....and if people pass them by....more fool them I say!!!b

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

If you meet what they and you are looking for what's the problem.

Anyone can create a persona online, the truth is often poles apart from reality.

Jo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always say fortune favours the brave or the foolish

Go for it and see what happens what do you have to lose and perhaps a lot to gain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends a lot on how I'm feeling in myself.

My "problem" isn't so much with fellas, I don't have issues with the leaguey thing there, my hang ups lie with women. I can't work out where I fit so to speak, there's nobody that I think "oh they're like me" and that's because I'm an individual - but I need to remember so is everyone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve come to realise there are no leagues. On my previous visits to fab, some of the people I met were people who I would put in an “out of league” box and not approach. But I took the chance and it worked out very well.

Take the chance, you’re only restricting yourself if not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have the same though theirs this tall, tanned, Long brown hair, hot sexy sales woman I've got to know in my local town i think its her own business too, She really down to earth and chatty and funny, When we chat i just think to myself id love to see you in tight pvc and thigh high boots and fishnets, Then i think to myself she way out of my league why would she wanna sleep with somebody like me !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Awww something about this post that makes me a little sad.

We are all equal, no one is better than the next. I personally am really attracted to people who are generally nice decent human beings.

Go for it, send them a message xx

Claire

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By *b_LIVI_ousWoman
over a year ago

Wigan

Currently experiencing exactly this ! But I’m still going ahead with meeting him because if he’s game then why not. Could be a whole lot of fun and who wants to miss out on fun, eh ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

The day I start thinking someone is better than me because of how they look is the day I give up.

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By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I used to feel like that and there was one person who had wanted to meet me but I avoided for that reason. Anyway after a break away I came back and thought fu*k it. We have met a couple of times now and had an amazing time...

I would be really upset if people didn't contact me for that reason. Not that I think I'm in the bracket of people anyway.

So these days I just go for it. I've been turned down but that's ok.. Not everyone can like you or you be to their taste. But at the same time it coukd be something amazing waiting to happen. xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, but that’s a lot to do with how I feel about myself. I have been approached by people I thought were out of my league and we’ve clicked. I just need to find my confidence to approach people again x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally as long as I match their age/gender preferences and their profile interests me, I always give it a go.

Worst case scenario they say no and I haven't lost anything for trying

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By *arkb73Man
over a year ago

Cheshire/Staffs

Of course there are leagues but they’re not always based on just looks.

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By *ockonmeMan
over a year ago

lincolnshire

I always feel from a blokes perspective on here and the odds being stacked against them due to its saturation of men vs women. I’ve given up being in a league. In fact I’m happy being the rejected one. One day I’ll be lucky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just go for who I fancy. Seems to work. I don't understand the mentality that stops people going for what they want. If you find someone attractive why wouldn't you want to see where it goes?

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

I don't believe in leagues, we're all unique individuals.. there are those who will find my uniqueness appealing and wish to know more and those that won't, same for those contacting me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never saw it as an out of my league thing cos it was just people i got on with best and sort of went from there but on that not i am punching a little at the minute it has to be said im a lucky man

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Of course there are leagues but they’re not always based on just looks. "

There are for some people I agree. I just see people I'd consider meeting and people I wouldn't. Whether they would consider meeting me is their decision I don't know what type of person they find attractive

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By *etite HandfulWoman
over a year ago

Chester

Just mail them! Far too many women on here don't make the first move whats the worse that can happen!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just go for it

the only time you should think I won’t bother is when there miles away x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

Damn I’ve been relegated ...... it’s jumpers for goalposts now....

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

I don't think I'm out of anyone's league. I think they're out of mine.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Just go for it, as long as you meet the age profile and description of people they are looking for.

You lose nothing by sending a polite message expressing an interest.

Good luck xx"

Exactly

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

It's not that I think other's are above me,but I do see some men who I feel are very attractive and just wouldn't even bother.

I know most are saying there's no such thing's as leagues,but there are to a degree.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

It's not that I think other's are above me,but I do see some men who I feel are very attractive and just wouldn't even bother.

I know most are saying there's no such thing's as leagues,but there are to a degree."

So the people you do bother with aren't very attractive?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

It's not that I think other's are above me,but I do see some men who I feel are very attractive and just wouldn't even bother.

I know most are saying there's no such thing's as leagues,but there are to a degree.

So the people you do bother with aren't very attractive?"

I think it's more, I could be a 7, which is still attractive, but I find people I rate as a 9 a bit intimidating. So I stick to 5-8, which is still attractive.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

... I'm not saying I'm a 7. I have no idea.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

It's not that I think other's are above me,but I do see some men who I feel are very attractive and just wouldn't even bother.

I know most are saying there's no such thing's as leagues,but there are to a degree.

So the people you do bother with aren't very attractive?"

. No I'm being silly it isn't just about the outside package though is it,I like attractive guy's on the average scale with a personality that's attractive to me.

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By *hebritukCouple
over a year ago

London

Can’t get away from league tables? Football, schools, NHS! What next?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm out of most people's age preferred range

Heavens I don't have leagues if people think they are above others then they are the one with the problem not me

It's not that I think other's are above me,but I do see some men who I feel are very attractive and just wouldn't even bother.

I know most are saying there's no such thing's as leagues,but there are to a degree.

So the people you do bother with aren't very attractive?

I think it's more, I could be a 7, which is still attractive, but I find people I rate as a 9 a bit intimidating. So I stick to 5-8, which is still attractive. "

Hmm. If I find someone attractive they're attractive I don't put a number on it. I suspect that might be a generational thing though.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

"My league are the odd and interesting - no power differentials there.

Well I've got odd covered

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I don't actually put numbers on people (I'm just trying to explain an instinctive response). I look at someone and ask if I think I have a chance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't actually put numbers on people (I'm just trying to explain an instinctive response). I look at someone and ask if I think I have a chance. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks everyone , for myself it’s definitely a confidence thing but I guess I’m gonna have to put my big girl pants on and give it a go! So watch your inboxes for a random message from me all you lovely people xxx

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

No such thing as out of your league, the issue lies with some people expect to find that ultimate goal or personal experience (or Gods Gift ) and if they can judge that from photos and not even contacting , your missing nothing.

I released quickly that not everyone reply’s on here but I would just go for it ..

what’s the worst that can happen .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like this too, specially on my single profile when a gymfit hottie messages, god id love to but my belly tells me no lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Thanks everyone , for myself it’s definitely a confidence thing but I guess I’m gonna have to put my big girl pants on and give it a go! So watch your inboxes for a random message from me all you lovely people xxx"

Definitely. I get it.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

The only "leagues" that exist are those we perceive ourselves, because of our own lack of confidence, self-perception or insecurities

Kind of when we think "they couldn't possibly like someone like me" - when I first started in all *this* I really didn't think anyone would find me in the slightest bit attractive or of interest, and to say I've been proved wrong would be an understatement.

I still am amazed when people express an interest in me, but don't think of it in terms of leagues in the slightest - we can't decide what someone else finds attractive so leagues don't come into it - it basically comes down to is there an attraction, interest and connection simple as.

There will be those that don't find me attractive or interesting and that's absolutely fine - there will similarly be those that I don't too - either way it doesn't mean we're in different leagues we just don't have an interest in one another in that way.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

"I don't believe in 'leagues'

I like people, personalities.

Some of the best looking people I know are boring buggers.

I'd take someone who can make me laugh over a hot body anyday

And you don't know if they can do that until you chat.. So nothing to lose by messaging someone "

Same here

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By *hebritukCouple
over a year ago

London

Lack confidence? You have the assets, I think it’s the other way round!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Lack confidence? You have the assets, I think it’s the other way round!!!"

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nearly all the men I have met I, at some point, thought were out of my league. At the beginning I would actually not meet some people because I thought they were just way too hot for me, but then I soon got over that, gained a bit more confidence and as a result I’ve had some incredible meets and a lot of fun.

If you’re attracted to someone/a couple then let them know

the worse they can say is thanks, but no thanks and you both move on. Nothing ventured, nothing gained and all that.

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By *YC SausageMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I was just having this conversation last night, in fact, I’ll copy and paste my reply.

“It was the way I was brought up. Italian grandmother.

Respect a woman no matter what, never raise your hand to her, never cheat, etc but the biggest thing she drummed into me was that I HAVE TO treat every woman as if she’s on a pedestal. Treat every woman like I’m not good enough. That way I’d always treat her right.”

So when I’m on FAB or in a club, I’m there knowing I’m out of my league with everyone. Doesn’t help with my shyness though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have a saying in the Northeast shy bairns get nought,so go for it op

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We were at a wedding recently where people were telling the groom that his new wife was out of his league and he was "punching". I thought it was bloody insulting, I'd never approach a man or woman on their wedding day to tell them their new partner was waaay better than them.

The people dishing out this insult genuinely thought it was a compliment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a saying in the Northeast shy bairns get nought,so go for it op"

I like this saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's the worst that can happen that wouldn't happen if you don't say hello?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With a good preparation I can get anyone

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By *aughtyandhandsomeMan
over a year ago

button moon

Yes I thought this before and never messaged. One in particular I wanted to message quite a while ago but thought she was well out my league. Then from some fun forum banter we have ended up pretty much inseparable. So what I say to you is go for it. You just never know.

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By *xperimentalistMan
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Even if you do think they are out of your league, whatever league that may be, see it more as a cup competition and sometimes there can be shock results

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"With a good preparation I can get anyone "

I’m sure you could!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a saying in the Northeast shy bairns get nought,so go for it op

I like this saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm out of a lot of people's league, but sometimes I'm generous and will throw those less than me a bone

Joking aside OP, there are not leagues, just types. You my be one of theirs, so you should brave it and throw them a message. You don't get if you don't ask

Holly

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I don't believe in 'leagues'

I like people, personalities.

Some of the best looking people I know are boring buggers.

I'd take someone who can make me laugh over a hot body anyday

And you don't know if they can do that until you chat.. So nothing to lose by messaging someone "

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By *ddit...Man
over a year ago

Land of the giants... ;-)

I used to think the same... however I came to realise that because peoples likes when it comes to personality and looks are so different that league's simply don't exist...

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By *rAitchMan
over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

With previous girlfriends, I always thought I was punching above my weight - so that's a bloody big punch!

Turned out they preferred personality over looks, which was a good thing for me!

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Just go for it, what’s the worst that can happen, they no.... but they could say yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We were at a wedding recently where people were telling the groom that his new wife was out of his league and he was "punching". I thought it was bloody insulting, I'd never approach a man or woman on their wedding day to tell them their new partner was waaay better than them.

The people dishing out this insult genuinely thought it was a compliment.

“She’s too fucking good for you” was caught on the official video of my wedding during our first dance

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The people dishing out this insult genuinely thought it was a compliment.

“She’s too fucking good for you” was caught on the official video of my wedding during our first dance

Oh no! Lol x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

The people dishing out this insult genuinely thought it was a compliment.

“She’s too fucking good for you” was caught on the official video of my wedding during our first dance

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Gosh, out of our league. If I felt that, they would be well out of our league, don’t play lower divisions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have tried, but sadly to no avail

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

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By *ddit...Man
over a year ago

Land of the giants... ;-)

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

You are amazing ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hate all this out of our league nonsense! Different stokes for different folks, those that thing they are better than anyone else for whatever reason are the only people we consider “out of our league” as our league consists of everyone who isn’t stuck up! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *_91Man
over a year ago

huds

Judging by the amount of opened and ignored messages in my “sent” box, I’m guessing there is a lot of people out of my league

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

Yeah there are those I would consider too hot to be interested in me or who I would feel too inadequate to approach.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one is ever out of anyone’s league it’s just a case of finding the right teams to play in your league with.....attraction comes in many forms x

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

You are amazing ....

Awwww thanks

Your amazing too xxx

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

People can often times surprise you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

You are amazing ....

Awwww thanks

Your amazing too xxx"
thankyou

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My wife is out of my league but.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like this too, we seem to do a lot better in person at clubs then we do on fab these days. I mean a lot of messages but not much that comes from it and if I see an amazing looking profile, I might wink or message but kinda not put the effort in thinking it’s not going to happen, I say I because it’s me doing 97% of the messaging lol, Scarlett

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By *YC SausageMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

I’d say the opposite haha....oh wait....I said that about you as well!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My wife is out of my league but....."

Awwwww x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People with more than 4 sex veris on their profile are out of my league. I would massively disappoint them.

I wouldn't 'just go for it', I won't meet them.

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

I’d say the opposite haha....oh wait....I said that about you as well!!!!"

You actually did!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to feel like that and avoided messaging a few people. In the end I thought fuck it, they can only say no or ignore if not interested so nothing lost. And you never know, you might be just what they are looking for

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"People can often times surprise you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained

It's true, but doesn't stop the confidence issues.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"People can often times surprise you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained

It's true, but doesn't stop the confidence issues. "

Let me bring a lengthy rope and talk about it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one can determine who is in a certain league, because leagues don't exist. We are all people with worth, beauty and charm, even though our insecurities may tell us otherwise. People really need to stop forming silly little leagues based on the shape of someone's body or how they look?

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By *YC SausageMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I get told I’m out of peoples league a lot but I’m not.

Just go for and see what happens

I’d say the opposite haha....oh wait....I said that about you as well!!!!

You actually did!!!

Doesn’t mean I still believe it lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have nothing to lose by condidering everyone an equal.

If they decide to look down on you, it speaks volumes about them. Do you need to seek their approval when they choose to place themselves on a pedestal?

(I have thick skin and an inability to acknowledge that anyone is superior to me in any way. I wouldn't take my advice)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Some lovely responses here thank you everyone, I will definitely start working on my confidence in going for it! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met a few men that I would opening admit were out of my league!!

They can only say no

message them!

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By *asilForty77Man
over a year ago

a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road

If you don't ask you won't get go for it Positive Mental Attitude

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By *onbons_xxMan
over a year ago

Bolton

You guys are great, it’s only yourself who is stopping you, the worst that can happen is a no thank but most folk will be flattered! If they're not and / or are rude for daring to ask then they’re not worth getting to know more and everyone is saved the bother!

I need to heed some of the advice in this thread mind

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By *rAngleseyMan
over a year ago

Anglesey

There is no league, Just the doubts you have about yourself.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

How do you know if someone is interested or not if you don't message them? They might be sat looking at your profile thinking you wouldn't possibly want to meet them.

I've got a second meet coming up with someone who I was flabbergasted when he said he'd like to meet me...yet he insists that he was thrilled when I agreed to meet him, almost as if he didn't think I'd want to

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"How do you know if someone is interested or not if you don't message them? They might be sat looking at your profile thinking you wouldn't possibly want to meet them.

Awww, so cute Lily! I'm sure you'll have a truly wonderful second meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't see leagues, as long as I'm not out of their preferences, I'll try to stick my foot in the door.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

"Awww, so cute Lily! I'm sure you'll have a truly wonderful second meet.

Thanks Meli...although i'm hoping it's more hot than cute

Just trying to illustrate the point that I wouldn't be looking forward to another meet if I hadn't put myself out there to begin with

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"Awww, so cute Lily! I'm sure you'll have a truly wonderful second meet.

Thanks Meli...although i'm hoping it's more hot than cute

Just trying to illustrate the point that I wouldn't be looking forward to another meet if I hadn't put myself out there to begin with

I am almost certain it will be hot.

Being a tad more serious, your point was well illustrated. People get too in their own heads and remove themselves from the possible choices because they worry. It's daft. Women are particularly bad for it. Different people like different things, people can be lovers of all types.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it. "

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful."

We're both works in progress, huh?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it. "

You do.

If you start from the basis that you are enough, you don't have to be equal or better but enough.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful.

We're both works in progress, huh? "

Yep, like the sistine chapel a couple of days in. We've got years ahead to work this shit out. We will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most I’d class as out of my league....

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By *_91Man
over a year ago

huds

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful.

We're both works in progress, huh? "

I happen to think you’re both stunning, if that helps?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful.

We're both works in progress, huh?

Yep, like the sistine chapel a couple of days in. We've got years ahead to work this shit out. We will.

Me too! X

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I'm bloody awful about assuming I'm less than, and I need to stop it.

Yes, you do need to but it's easier said than done. I still fall back on the less than thought patterns, I did earlier tonight. It's daft and not grounded in reality nor is it helpful.

We're both works in progress, huh?

Yep, like the sistine chapel a couple of days in. We've got years ahead to work this shit out. We will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We know exactly what you mean. Most of the time were very confident and if we see someone we like when were out we will approach them but on here we go a bit shy sometimes.

Good luck op do what makes you nappy let's face it what's the worst that can happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always go for it...worst that can happen is not getting a reply or seeing your message get deleted.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We know exactly what you mean. Most of the time were very confident and if we see someone we like when were out we will approach them but on here we go a bit shy sometimes.

Good luck op do what makes you nappy let's face it what's the worst that can happen.

Well someone could send laughing emojis to us and say ‘you gotta be kidding?’ Lol but I’m hopeful that nobody on here would be that mean lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you should definitely go for it

good things could happen

i am glad i did, tho it was he that messaged first,

n even tho its been over 4yrs i still think he is way out of my league... hes everything i knew i wanted n never thought i'd get

i still have to pinch myself... n stop myself from constantly thinking i am not enough for him

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I've got a great friend I meet sometimes in clubs. I'd never have approached him for the reasons here. But he's just the most lovely guy and he's as into me as I am into him. We've got a lovely thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are no leagues, it's easy to say that we are all if equal value, yet so often either we know it logically but find it hard to live emotionally.

I was once told that another was not worthy of me. I felt the same about her, way out of my league.

All the reassurances in the world may sound completely logical and totally obvious, but unless we can believe it deep inside ourselves, the idea of leagues adequacy or our own worth does not change.

Perhaps what makes the change is when we discover that others accept us as we are, despite what our own feelings about ourselves may be.....

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I often think I'm not good enough for some and definitely feel out of their league. Other people have made me think like this with their actions or words.

'We can't please all the people all the time'.

Jo.Xx

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"There are no leagues, it's easy to say that we are all if equal value, yet so often either we know it logically but find it hard to live emotionally.

I was once told that another was not worthy of me. I felt the same about her, way out of my league.

All the reassurances in the world may sound completely logical and totally obvious, but unless we can believe it deep inside ourselves, the idea of leagues adequacy or our own worth does not change.

Perhaps what makes the change is when we discover that others accept us as we are, despite what our own feelings about ourselves may be....."

Oh god yes. My friend I just mentioned. He just gets me. It's authentic and vulnerable and wonderful (and, ahem, hot). He's good for the soul.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been to bed with some very good looking people, whilst being very average looking myself

I don't think are out of my league because they are better looking

Sexual attraction is about so much more than looks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how you see someone is not necessarily how that person views themself

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"how you see someone is not necessarily how that person views themself

Yes and it's no indication of how they will see you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always think this, and when someone responds I’m taken by surprise, haha, especially if they actually compliment me too! Usually end up talking myself out of their interest and into their “nope, not for me” though. Viv xx

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I always think this, and when someone responds I’m taken by surprise, haha, especially if they actually compliment me too! Usually end up talking myself out of their interest and into their “nope, not for me” though. Viv xx"

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better. "

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx"

I hear you. I'm working on confidence being about me, not other people. I am who I am whether they want me or not, and that's great. It's a work in progress.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx

I hear you. I'm working on confidence being about me, not other people. I am who I am whether they want me or not, and that's great. It's a work in progress. "

That’s great! I’m trying to, I keep saying to myself I’m just me and they can take me or leave me, but always seem to accept why people don’t take me as i am. We’ll both get there. OP, you will too xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx

I hear you. I'm working on confidence being about me, not other people. I am who I am whether they want me or not, and that's great. It's a work in progress. "

self belief is very sexy

youre sexy so start believing

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx

I hear you. I'm working on confidence being about me, not other people. I am who I am whether they want me or not, and that's great. It's a work in progress.

self belief is very sexy

youre sexy so start believing

Oh, it's about me not sex or people I want to fuck. It just has benefits.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We know exactly what you mean. Most of the time were very confident and if we see someone we like when were out we will approach them but on here we go a bit shy sometimes.

Good luck op do what makes you nappy let's face it what's the worst that can happen.

Well someone could send laughing emojis to us and say ‘you gotta be kidding?’ Lol but I’m hopeful that nobody on here would be that mean lol x"

We would all like to think people aren't that mean. But like everywhere there is that one ass that spoils it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We constantly think that! We go through the site and think,there isn't any point because we are clearly not what a profile is looking for.we are fine with that though.its better for us to not try,than get a nasty message back x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If its someone that really calls my attention I usualy think a NO is always guaranteed, sometimes people have different tastes and opinions and might surprise us with a YES.. without trying we never know in my opinion

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By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton

"how you see someone is not necessarily how that person views themself

agreed

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

I'm so bad at this. Trying to get better.

Me too, but the amount of knock backs I’ve had I kind of lost a lot of my confidence. Taking some doing to get it back xx

I hear you. I'm working on confidence being about me, not other people. I am who I am whether they want me or not, and that's great. It's a work in progress. "

That’s where you need to start. Confidence is about you and not what others think, some will like you and some don’t, that’s life.

What is important is that you know who you are, confident in yourself and then you will own it, embrace it and love it

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By *agenta400Woman
over a year ago

All over the shop

I feel uncomfy going outta my league as I feel very self conscious with awful legs.

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By *agenta400Woman
over a year ago

All over the shop

Actually I just feel self conscious about them full stop.

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By *entleman55Man
over a year ago

S’th West Mc/r

Not sure what league I’m in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think fuck it, go for it.

Then I cba and another sexless night goes by!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not sure what league I’m in

Surely the league of gentlemen?

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

"Not sure what league I’m in

Surely the league of gentlemen?"

....of course you can be my wife Dave....

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By *entleman55Man
over a year ago

S’th West Mc/r

"Not sure what league I’m in

Surely the league of gentlemen?"

Love it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always felt this way and recently decided to just stop it. I'm having sooo much more fun now with a fuck it attitude! Annoyed for all the years wasted holding myself back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find I always hesitate and think that a lot of women are way out of my league getting up the courage to ask anything is my biggest floor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not sure what league I’m in

Surely the league of gentlemen?"

loved that programme

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've become comfortable in my own skin, I've worn it long enough.

And not everyone is ever going to see me or accept me as I am.

Mostly I'm ok with that, yet sometimes another walks into our lives, then walks away.

When it happens it makes us all question our own value, that's just part of life.

Yet when it happens it can make each of us stop and wonder if others are out of our league. That's part of life too.

Maybe we should all be a little kinder and more accepting of ourselves, yet sometimes that can be hard too....

Tonight, and for some time, I feel like that hermit in a cave, and wonder often if it's worth coming outside again....

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By *apiomanMan
over a year ago

Shipley

"My league are the odd and interesting - no power differentials there.

I like the odd, interesting and quirky too. Maybe we need a special box to tick.

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By *oppet22TV/TS
over a year ago

huddersfield

Just go for it worse that can happen is a no

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By *apiomanMan
over a year ago

Shipley

To be honest, as a single guy on Fab, I get 99% of messages ignored whatever league the woman is in. I don’t resent this, just accept that this is the reality of the situation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest, as a single guy on Fab, I get 99% of messages ignored whatever league the woman is in. I don’t resent this, just accept that this is the reality of the situation. "
that's very gracious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I went for the top and worked down

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