FabSwingers.com forum: CSA

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Who has experience of these people?

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By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

It's Cms now not Csa.

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

Spent a lot of my childhood in therapy with their child councillors....lovely people they were tbh.....

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

It's not gender specific.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Yes, I have OP, both as paying and non paying parent. Never really had any issues apart from the time it takes to change things with them.

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By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

By making them support their offspring? ??

Without Csa/Cms my ex wouldn't bother to contribute.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I knew someone who emigrated because of the CSA

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

I bet most opinions will diffa by gender ... I agree fathers should pay their share but I’ve known guys who’ve paid their share and ten the woman wants more or the csa come after more and the guys have been left skint and depressed...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

Don't you mean that they will make all parents, male or female pay for the child they created?

All the men you hear moaning that all their money has been taken by an Ex etc. Don't you stop and think, how can an Ex take all the money, they can't . What the men mean is that now they don't live in the family home and have a house of there own and have to pay to look after their children leaves them with little money. well news flash that is how life is unless you get a good job.

Also the CMS amount is the bare minimum a man or woman should provide. When I hear that they only give that amount and nothing more I always think what scum. Most think that they are giving the Ex money to go partys, drinking etc, forgetting that they have a house and kids to look after etc most of the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/08/19 11:09:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I bet most opinions will diffa by gender ... I agree fathers should pay their share but I’ve known guys who’ve paid their share and ten the woman wants more or the csa come after more and the guys have been left skint and depressed... "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They aren't allowed to take ridculus amounts off ya and it also depends on how many kids you have so be smart and wrap it

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

If you earn say 100k a year do they take lots more ?

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By *mileyculturebelfastMan
over a year ago

belfast

They took a third of my wage for one child. Left me unable to get a house and had to move back home. Also I had my daughter at least half the week and all the summer holidays. They're cunts.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

It's not about the child it's only about saving the taxpayer..

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

The CMS as they are now called have an incredibly difficult job and therefore stick very rigidly to guidelines and legislation laid out for them - so to anyone bemoaning them you've chosen the wrong target, it's those that make the laws they uphold and indeed those that seek to evade them that are the problem.

The base rate of 20% of net income (which has allowances for how often you see the kids, other kids you may have etc) built in is a more than fair amount as a minimum to be honest.

Yes there are those on both sides of the equation that try and take advantage - ultimately though it's the children who need to be taken care of and that is what the CMS are there to ensure happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

CMS as they’re now called oh yeah great experiences not, currently in investigative complaint process raised by my local MP wrote email to the minister responsible as well, been an absolute joke so far but now getting regular phone calls and updates, much better fairer system if they can actually get enough staff to deal with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They took a third of my wage for one child. Left me unable to get a house and had to move back home. Also I had my daughter at least half the week and all the summer holidays. They're cunts. "

They base they amount you pay on what you earn and time you have your child, also if you have other children the amount goes down per child.

If you are skint after that your either spending too much or dont earn enough. I have no sympathy for people who claim to be skin, look at what tour spending money on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The CMS as they are now called have an incredibly difficult job and therefore stick very rigidly to guidelines and legislation laid out for them - so to anyone bemoaning them you've chosen the wrong target, it's those that make the laws they uphold and indeed those that seek to evade them that are the problem.

The base rate of 20% of net income (which has allowances for how often you see the kids, other kids you may have etc) built in is a more than fair amount as a minimum to be honest.

Yes there are those on both sides of the equation that try and take advantage - ultimately though it's the children who need to be taken care of and that is what the CMS are there to ensure happens."

So is CSA/CMS some kind of government thing, to make sure children get the support they rightly deserve ? That's a brilliant idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you earn say 100k a year do they take lots more ?"

Yes of course they would, why wouldn't they? You pay a percentage of your pay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s 20% or something they can take up to 40% to include arrears so long as they don’t leave them below the bare minimum, I think non paying parents should get blacklisted on credit files if they fail to pay, but being a tomboy and most of my friends being Male I’ve seen both sides to the story and many females are just as bad at not paying as males !

A court order for council tax arrears can take more money than CMS

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

The trouble is that it relies on the parents being responsible. The one receiving to spend it responsibly and the one giving it to not weaponise it.

Only the child suffers and there are no winners. I guess the contribution lasts until the child is 18 or still in full time education. ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men

By making them support their offspring? ??

Without Csa/Cms my ex wouldn't bother to contribute."

Same here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

All good advice. I left the mother the house, and a court order set what I paid. My 18 year old son now has a good job, so I reduced what I was paying her. Not by half. She works 2 days a week, I work my nuts off. She’s now gone to the csa or cma and they are demanding I treble what I give her. Tbh I will be better off unemployed for the quality of life I’ll have.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"All good advice. I left the mother the house, and a court order set what I paid. My 18 year old son now has a good job, so I reduced what I was paying her. Not by half. She works 2 days a week, I work my nuts off. She’s now gone to the csa or cma and they are demanding I treble what I give her. Tbh I will be better off unemployed for the quality of life I’ll have. "

When my first marriage ended my lad was 8, and I had him living with me. This was some 33 years ago now, and in order for my ex wife not to contest his living with me she kept the child support and I continued to pay her £120 a month. But I wanted him and knew I’d never get custody so that was that.

My kids from my second marriage are grown up now and I am continually bailing them out. Because I want to, and because they are my kids but since they had both left home when we split up I didn’t pay my ex anything towards the kids.

I guess everyone is different, I just see it like this. If I have it I’ll happily give it to my kids if they need it.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"They took a third of my wage for one child. Left me unable to get a house and had to move back home. Also I had my daughter at least half the week and all the summer holidays. They're cunts.

They base they amount you pay on what you earn and time you have your child, also if you have other children the amount goes down per child.

If you are skint after that your either spending too much or dont earn enough. I have no sympathy for people who claim to be skin, look at what tour spending money on!"

It's 20% of what your gross income is, they allow pension on top of that as well. There are several different bands for income. It looks like he needs to contact them and get his case reviewed as well as the amount of nights he is having the children. Also, they will up the amount to pay if people are in arrears with CM as well as reduce if its been over-paid. I've always found them to be fair.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?"

There shouldn't be any payments due if the child has left full time education unless there are arrears to be paid off.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?

There shouldn't be any payments due if the child has left full time education unless there are arrears to be paid off. "

My reading was he'd rexuced the maintenance after his son had turned 18, I'm guessing there's more than 1 child.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?

There shouldn't be any payments due if the child has left full time education unless there are arrears to be paid off.

My reading was he'd rexuced the maintenance after his son had turned 18, I'm guessing there's more than 1 child."

Good point. I think it sounds like a review is needed though.

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

What utter bollocks. I received CSA payments for 6 years and they saved me and my son from poverty.

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By *inkysexpotMan
over a year ago

leeds

There's good points and bad points.

Every case is different so everyone will have a differing view.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

If the man or woman tricks you it's a bitter pill

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Who has experience of these people? "

All the so called breeders on fab I suspect.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men

By making them support their offspring? ??

Without Csa/Cms my ex wouldn't bother to contribute."

Yep this.

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By *izzymonkeyMan
over a year ago

Hiding In A Bush

"Who has experience of these people?

All the so called breeders on fab I suspect. "

Hahahahahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

been battling csa/cms for 9 years.

Liability order now in place - bailiffs finally managed to get £50 a week split between me, first wife and bailiff fees

lasted 2 months.

^^ purely for arrears.

ongoing assessment being ignored

everyone has their own view on cms. from my point of view the system needs tougher sanctions on parents who deliberately refuse to support their children

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes when it was CSA, absent parent kept moving so they had trouble pinning him down. After three years the courts decided it best if we closed the case and just gave up trying to get him to pay. 16years later he tried to make contact my daughter told him to f-off as she had seen all the paperwork and court case files. CSA were brilliant they tried everything.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Less hassle all round to put single parents on benefits

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex and I sorted it out ourselves, like adults.

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By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

"My ex and I sorted it out ourselves, like adults.

Unfortunately only works if both behave like adults. Private arrangement my ex took to mean pay what he liked when he could be bothered. Rather than the arrangements he'd suggested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sympathise with every woman that battles these fathers who shirk responsibilities. They always seem to get away with non payments with their casual workings, going on the dole and switches of address.

However those of us who played by the rules, worked twice as many hours so we could afford to live and also were forced into that position by the mothers infidelity were hit twice as hard.

In the mid to late 90's and beyond I payed 33% of my average earnings. That's for one child. At one stage because of a CSA cock up I payed 44% which was the maximum at that time. My sons mother had 2 jobs and the guy she ran off with worked full time also, I bought their house while I could only afford to rent. As one of her jobs was full time and therefore on no benefits she received all of the money I paid weekly. He was sent out to me every weekend in rags.

When Blair and Labour got in the assessment structure was altered to 15% of your wages for 1 child, 20% for 2 and a maximum of 25% for 3 children and above.

I still was still struggling paying 33-44% for many years until it changed for me. Their excuse was all new claimants were assets on the new formula but those of us already paying had to wait.

Many times I'd looked at my gas oven wondering if my head would fit in it.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

And that's why many simply give up work ..

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I'm so lucky to get £30 a month

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I would pay for my child but not another's

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Less hassle all round to put single parents on benefits "

Great idea, let the state take care of kids and remove all responsibility from absent parents. Hope you don't mind the inevitable higher taxes that come with that scenario then.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

"Less hassle all round to put single parents on benefits

Great idea, let the state take care of kids and remove all responsibility from absent parents. Hope you don't mind the inevitable higher taxes that come with that scenario then.

We desperately need more children as an economy..

Absent parents should not all be tarred with the same brush.. they might have been running away from a nightmare..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am shocked that so many people are against or complaining about paying for their children, surely that can't be a bad thing.

And if that absent parent starts another family after their first children then they should have accounted for this financially before sowing their seed surly!

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By *erriAnneTV/TS
over a year ago

The shire

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men

Don't you mean that they will make all parents, male or female pay for the child they created?

Some absolute nonsense in this post. It's not the bare minimum they take its based on last year's p60. I have a lot of overtime in last year's wages which were used to pay for my sons mobile contract weekends away and a very expensive holiday to America a few weeks ago. They've taken my overtime into account and I have to wait until next year to see if I can get and adjustment on that figure. We had a family based arrangement and I was paying her a decent sum and also his phone as I've mentioned plus nice new trainers clothes school trips last one is 900 quid for a trip to Spain which I paid for etc etc. Now the figure set is really above what I really should be paying based on my salary as overtime is not set and can be stopped at any time. Now she is responsible for all of these things so she will be out of pocket because someone told her she'd get more money. So now I am paying her what I've been set I suppose in your eyes I'm now Scum!!! Jesus get your head out of the sand and see reality. Its not all black and white there's more to consider and because she's gone to them everyone is losing out. Absulute Scum my arse!!!!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Less hassle all round to put single parents on benefits

Great idea, let the state take care of kids and remove all responsibility from absent parents. Hope you don't mind the inevitable higher taxes that come with that scenario then.

We desperately need more children as an economy..

Absent parents should not all be tarred with the same brush.. they might have been running away from a nightmare..

I understand that, but they are still responsible for the upkeep of their children. Cms deals with this so parents don't have to have contact. There's really no excuse you can possibly use for not accepting responsibility for your kids.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

"I am shocked that so many people are against or complaining about paying for their children, surely that can't be a bad thing.

And if that absent parent starts another family after their first children then they should have accounted for this financially before sowing their seed surly! "

But not everyone can afford them but surely they are entitled to have them..

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By *upidscoupleCouple
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Hate the system, not seen child for years because my ex won't allow it but have to pay the mum so she can take child to Florida each year. Was happily giving it to child directly each month (on my ex's agreement) but ex got in new relationship & said I had to pay her instead.

Went on SSP for months when ended up in hospital after an accident for a week & couldn't work for a long time afterwards - was getting approx £90 a week but still had to pay over £50 a week to ex (you tell me how I was supposed to do that & still pay bills????)

CMS just don't care at all.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Better if it's a benefit in my eyes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am shocked that so many people are against or complaining about paying for their children, surely that can't be a bad thing.

And if that absent parent starts another family after their first children then they should have accounted for this financially before sowing their seed surly! "

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

But does the first child trump the second ? They are both equal.imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 24/08/19 19:58:46]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ex chooses not to pay. So far 3k in arrears.. glad she can live on fresh air!.

Its law to pay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am shocked that so many people are against or complaining about paying for their children, surely that can't be a bad thing.

And if that absent parent starts another family after their first children then they should have accounted for this financially before sowing their seed surly!

But not everyone can afford them but surely they are entitled to have them.."

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men

Don't you mean that they will make all parents, male or female pay for the child they created?

I know your pain buddy...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

They're cunts to women and children too. My kids dad have given the CMS the run around for over 16 years and they continue to allow him to get away with not supporting his own children.

Children he asked me to have when we did. Then another and another. He has the affair and left us for her. Never saw our kids again.... his choice! Our youngest is nearly 17 yrs old. He left when I was 6 months pregnant with her. Yet every single day since, it's been left entirely upto me to feed them, clothe them, keep a roof over their heads and keep them warm etc. Not to mention birthdays and every Christmas.

So why should he get away with paying half of what it takes to raise a child? He shouldn't but he always managed to, no thanks to child maintenance!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?"

Sorry, I also have a daughter to pay for as she is 15. I don’t object to paying if I’m honest but it grinds me that the mother works 2 days a week, and has sponged off me for 30+ years and I see no end to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are you still paying if he's 18 and has a job?

Only 3 more years then. Hope you can sort it.

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By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

"No experience but know ppl who have.. and they are cunts to men"

Not always ... I had an ongoing case where my ex still owes 11k

Then because the CSA changed they had to close the case

The 11k he owed was still less than my costs for caring for our children on my own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely each individual case needs to be dealt with uniquely rather than apply a blanket percentage. Suppose simply isn’t enough manpower to do that and do a generic band is applied that will work for some and not for others.

So sad people can’t just respect each other after a relationship ends and be man or woman enough to come to an agreement between two adults to care for their children in a fair and loving manner. Never understand people who don’t want their children to have the best possible upbringing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

20 years of arguing with them and still nothing.

There are so many legal loopholes that even the CSA/cms staff admit my ex doesn’t need to pay if he doesn’t want to.

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By *iss tastyWoman
over a year ago

Blackpool

With both my children they have different dads and the cases have been closed against their dads as apparently they arent working etc so they cant claim the money off of them including the arrears . It's frustrating as I know they are both lying but I cant prove it so my kids miss out on things as I cant afford it. My kids have a roof over their head, clothes on their back and food in their tummy plus a mum who loves them but their dads think they have rights to see them. Not in my book they dont. They helped create them so why shouldn't they pay for them too?

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By *ewkesbury cowboyMan
over a year ago

Tewkesbury

Nope, I don't want my ex's help. Because I know any money I get from her will be ill-gotten gains

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surely each individual case needs to be dealt with uniquely rather than apply a blanket percentage. Suppose simply isn’t enough manpower to do that and do a generic band is applied that will work for some and not for others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, and despite showing I'd been giving my ex money for a couple of years they still backdated everything and left me with huge arrears.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, and despite showing I'd been giving my ex money for a couple of years they still backdated everything and left me with huge arrears.

There’s only one very sad end for some men when faced with that.

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By *pitfiremk10Man
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Who has experience of these people?

All the so called breeders on fab I suspect. "

If they haven't yet they will do

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