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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita What about mental disabilities?" It depends on the disability, and what you consider disabled. I probably wouldn't find someone with a learning disability attractive but mental health is a complex and varied issue. I wear hearing aids but don't consider myself to have a disability. Nita | |||
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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita What about mental disabilities? It depends on the disability, and what you consider disabled. I probably wouldn't find someone with a learning disability attractive but mental health is a complex and varied issue. I wear hearing aids but don't consider myself to have a disability. Nita" So like me it depends on the disability, rather than anyone. I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. | |||
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"Depends on the disability surely" I think thats the most honest answer here as people so go on looks primarily for a meet a loss of a limb might not put most off but a facial disfigurement may. Its easy and politically correct to say any wouldn't on a forum but the reality is different. | |||
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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita What about mental disabilities? It depends on the disability, and what you consider disabled. I probably wouldn't find someone with a learning disability attractive but mental health is a complex and varied issue. I wear hearing aids but don't consider myself to have a disability. Nita So like me it depends on the disability, rather than anyone. I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped." Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita | |||
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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita What about mental disabilities? It depends on the disability, and what you consider disabled. I probably wouldn't find someone with a learning disability attractive but mental health is a complex and varied issue. I wear hearing aids but don't consider myself to have a disability. Nita So like me it depends on the disability, rather than anyone. I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita" What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging." Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. " Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. | |||
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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita What about mental disabilities? It depends on the disability, and what you consider disabled. I probably wouldn't find someone with a learning disability attractive but mental health is a complex and varied issue. I wear hearing aids but don't consider myself to have a disability. Nita So like me it depends on the disability, rather than anyone. I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging." Handicapped is just an older fashioned way of saying disabled and not used anymore although still used in the US ie ‘handicapped parking’ instead of disabled parking | |||
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"Depends on the disability surely" same here. Ian way going | |||
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"Iv got no hangups having a meet with someone who has a physical disabilitie but mental is a different kettle of fish I'd steer clear of them" " THEM"..v ignorant ... | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK." I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term. | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term." Interchangeable then... sorry OP we slightly side tracked the thread | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term." Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not! | |||
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"Iv got no hangups having a meet with someone who has a physical disabilitie but mental is a different kettle of fish I'd steer clear of them " THEM"..v ignorant ..." Why? | |||
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"I was in a long term fwb at one time with a guy with mental health issues, namely psychosis and that was difficult at times when he was in a bad place so I get why people might want to steer clear. Physical disabilities, people are just people and it wouldn't be an issue and if it caused difficulties say, in the bedroom we could just adapt to it x" Bet that has scared u ? | |||
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"Depends on the disability surely" that so true these days because it hard for those with disabilities | |||
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"Mental and physical are different ... mental is more controlling and physical is more on appearance .. so u can’t class both in the same subject .... one can be emotional and the other can be hell .. " I Don't understand what you mean mental is more controlling? | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term. Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not!" Actually it does change a lot. The social model of disability, more acceptable now than the traditional medical model would say disabled person not person with a disability. The reason being is that it is society that disables the person not the impairment they have. (Like door handles being too high for wheelchair users or attitudes that stigmatise people with mental health conditions). Handicapped is now considered unacceptable. Unless you’re discussing your golf handicap. | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term. Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not! Actually it does change a lot. The social model of disability, more acceptable now than the traditional medical model would say disabled person not person with a disability. The reason being is that it is society that disables the person not the impairment they have. (Like door handles being too high for wheelchair users or attitudes that stigmatise people with mental health conditions). Handicapped is now considered unacceptable. Unless you’re discussing your golf handicap. " I am now entirely confused how to even talk about it without being offensive . | |||
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"I wouldn't consider than disabled either, maybe handicapped. Handicapped is how people with disabilities used to be described... so not sure that is politically correct these days. I do kind of agree tho. To me it is a disability it it cannot be "treated" per se. Others will have their own interpretation. Without glasses/contact lenses and hearing aids, I would definitely be disabled. I have very poor eyesight too... Nita What, why? Does the word handicapped have a negative annotation to it? I'm genuinely curious in case I'm using it wrong. I agree, to me disability means not being able to do something, I thought handicapped just means that doing something can be challenging. Maybe handicapped is just an old fashioned word. Not really heard it in relation to people since the 80s. Maybe need to ask a disabled person if it's not an acceptable term these days. Just dawned on me... it will be a Canadian thing... tend to forget that not everyone is in the UK. I'm not Canadian though I just googled both definitions and seems that if anything disabled would be the less accurate term. Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not! Actually it does change a lot. The social model of disability, more acceptable now than the traditional medical model would say disabled person not person with a disability. The reason being is that it is society that disables the person not the impairment they have. (Like door handles being too high for wheelchair users or attitudes that stigmatise people with mental health conditions). Handicapped is now considered unacceptable. Unless you’re discussing your golf handicap. I am now entirely confused how to even talk about it without being offensive . " dont pander to people who cry over nawt its very freeing | |||
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"Mental and physical are different ... mental is more controlling and physical is more on appearance .. so u can’t class both in the same subject .... one can be emotional and the other can be hell .. " I have a physical disability but you definitely can't see it unless you have x-ray vision! | |||
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" Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not! Actually it does change a lot. The social model of disability, more acceptable now than the traditional medical model would say disabled person not person with a disability. The reason being is that it is society that disables the person not the impairment they have. (Like door handles being too high for wheelchair users or attitudes that stigmatise people with mental health conditions). Handicapped is now considered unacceptable. Unless you’re discussing your golf handicap. " When I was a child the word cretin and spastic were still used. There was even a charity called the spastic society. | |||
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" Generally you would say ‘person with a disability’ rather than ‘disabled person’ I’ve worked in this area for a long time and things are always changing with regards to what’s the ‘right’ thing to say or not! Actually it does change a lot. The social model of disability, more acceptable now than the traditional medical model would say disabled person not person with a disability. The reason being is that it is society that disables the person not the impairment they have. (Like door handles being too high for wheelchair users or attitudes that stigmatise people with mental health conditions). Handicapped is now considered unacceptable. Unless you’re discussing your golf handicap. When I was a child the word cretin and spastic were still used. There was even a charity called the spastic society. " Fortunately society has moved on. There are still improvements to be made though. | |||
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"I think there is a dangerous line between being accepting of disability and fetishising it I know a guy who is only attracted to amputees I've always been a little uneasy about that" I know a guy who is only attracted to girls with big tits and the girls he sees know this. As long as the amputee knows his taste then I would not judge them on that but yes there is nowt as queer as folk | |||
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"I’m paralysed in a wheelchair and I’m glad that people are actually talking about it but from my point of view people are far to scared to even find out. As we can see from this thread people walk on eggshells and are so afraid of doing or saying something un pc that it just puts them off, I always say people are attracted to what they want which is fine but when your supposedly just looking for sexual fun which let’s face it is what this site is about why are people talking about doing long walks and bs. I have a great collection of toys that are there to be used and enjoyed always with condoms so always safe and clean and then you just get some lame excuse about that and sometimes in the next breath they are looking for bareback or some random stranger to come fuck them “the more the merrier” I’ve heard at times. It’s a shame that when I joined this site I thought I would be in a place with open minded people and would be a good place to find accepting people but to be honest I’ve come across the opposite, except a few of course, such a shame but you just have to look at the world and it’s not hard to understand. " You look great to me A physical disability wouldn't be a deal breaker for me, but a learning disability most certainly would. | |||
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"Depends on the disability surely" | |||
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"I’m paralysed in a wheelchair and I’m glad that people are actually talking about it but from my point of view people are far to scared to even find out. As we can see from this thread people walk on eggshells and are so afraid of doing or saying something un pc that it just puts them off, I always say people are attracted to what they want which is fine but when your supposedly just looking for sexual fun which let’s face it is what this site is about why are people talking about doing long walks and bs. I have a great collection of toys that are there to be used and enjoyed always with condoms so always safe and clean and then you just get some lame excuse about that and sometimes in the next breath they are looking for bareback or some random stranger to come fuck them “the more the merrier” I’ve heard at times. It’s a shame that when I joined this site I thought I would be in a place with open minded people and would be a good place to find accepting people but to be honest I’ve come across the opposite, except a few of course, such a shame but you just have to look at the world and it’s not hard to understand. " What lame excuse about toys? I hate toys, never use them. People may be accepting and open minded. It doesn't mean they have to fuck you though. I dislike it when people try to make others feel guilty for not wanting to fuck them. | |||
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"To be honest all that matters whether you find someone attractive or not, irrespective of disability." I couldn't agree more. | |||
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"I'm assuming when people say they wouldn't meet someone with a learning disability they are actually talking about what? Meeting someone who hasn't the mental capacity to consent? Would anyone here really meet someone who couldn't give informed and reasoned consent. I aak because I have a learning disability... I also have no problem finding people to meet, two undergraduate degrees and one post-grad... and left wondering why people say they won't meet someone with a learning disability. Oh... Linked to my SLD (specific learning disability) is Autism. Linked to that is depression, sensory overload and anxiety, but I meet on my terms, when I know I'm well enough too. If you met me at a club you might, if you knew what to look for, get ASD, but most people have no clue. Before you start saying I wouldn't meet someone with xxxxx, and painting all people with the same tar, actually take some time to think about what you really mean." I believe there are far worse people on this site than you can imagine. And to answer your question, yes I do believe there are people here who wouldn't have a problem meeting someone who can't give 'conscious' consent. | |||
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"I'm assuming when people say they wouldn't meet someone with a learning disability they are actually talking about what? Meeting someone who hasn't the mental capacity to consent? Would anyone here really meet someone who couldn't give informed and reasoned consent. I aak because I have a learning disability... I also have no problem finding people to meet, two undergraduate degrees and one post-grad... and left wondering why people say they won't meet someone with a learning disability. Oh... Linked to my SLD (specific learning disability) is Autism. Linked to that is depression, sensory overload and anxiety, but I meet on my terms, when I know I'm well enough too. If you met me at a club you might, if you knew what to look for, get ASD, but most people have no clue. Before you start saying I wouldn't meet someone with xxxxx, and painting all people with the same tar, actually take some time to think about what you really mean." If that was aimed at me, I do know what I really mean. Degree in ABA therapy here. Just as some peoples preferece is no Asians/black only/ 420 friendly/no overweight etc , etc. | |||
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"I'm assuming when people say they wouldn't meet someone with a learning disability they are actually talking about what? Meeting someone who hasn't the mental capacity to consent? Would anyone here really meet someone who couldn't give informed and reasoned consent. I aak because I have a learning disability... I also have no problem finding people to meet, two undergraduate degrees and one post-grad... and left wondering why people say they won't meet someone with a learning disability. Oh... Linked to my SLD (specific learning disability) is Autism. Linked to that is depression, sensory overload and anxiety, but I meet on my terms, when I know I'm well enough too. If you met me at a club you might, if you knew what to look for, get ASD, but most people have no clue. Before you start saying I wouldn't meet someone with xxxxx, and painting all people with the same tar, actually take some time to think about what you really mean." Agreed. I think people are talking about either someone so floridly unwell with a mental health condition that they could be sectioned at that point or be ruled to have no capacity (with the understanding that capacity fluctuates as people assume it doesn’t) or a learning difficulty so severe there would be lack of consent or a safeguarding alert raised. People forget that learning difficulties could be severe dyslexia (and could be severe enough to be classed as disability under the Eq act 2010 but really not be cause for concern in terms of meets here. Many people are covered under disabled by the Eq act 2010 who would never term themselves as disabled - for example if you have cancer you are disabled from the point of diagnosis. We should also be embracing the social model of disability and remembering that it’s the set up of society including environment and attitudes that disable not the condition or impairment itself. | |||
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"If I'm attracted to someone then any disability is not an issue. Depending what the disability is, the sex might just have to be more creative. Nita" This. Nice one Nita | |||
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"I'm assuming when people say they wouldn't meet someone with a learning disability they are actually talking about what? Meeting someone who hasn't the mental capacity to consent? Would anyone here really meet someone who couldn't give informed and reasoned consent. I aak because I have a learning disability... I also have no problem finding people to meet, two undergraduate degrees and one post-grad... and left wondering why people say they won't meet someone with a learning disability. Oh... Linked to my SLD (specific learning disability) is Autism. Linked to that is depression, sensory overload and anxiety, but I meet on my terms, when I know I'm well enough too. If you met me at a club you might, if you knew what to look for, get ASD, but most people have no clue. Before you start saying I wouldn't meet someone with xxxxx, and painting all people with the same tar, actually take some time to think about what you really mean." Yep. When people think of physical disabilities they usually think of something you can physically see. My physical disabilities are related to a heart condition and chronic pain from damage to my femoral nerve. Meeting me you'd likely never know anything was wrong unless I mentioned it. | |||
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"I'm assuming when people say they wouldn't meet someone with a learning disability they are actually talking about what? Meeting someone who hasn't the mental capacity to consent? Would anyone here really meet someone who couldn't give informed and reasoned consent. I aak because I have a learning disability... I also have no problem finding people to meet, two undergraduate degrees and one post-grad... and left wondering why people say they won't meet someone with a learning disability. Oh... Linked to my SLD (specific learning disability) is Autism. Linked to that is depression, sensory overload and anxiety, but I meet on my terms, when I know I'm well enough too. If you met me at a club you might, if you knew what to look for, get ASD, but most people have no clue. Before you start saying I wouldn't meet someone with xxxxx, and painting all people with the same tar, actually take some time to think about what you really mean." Surely they mean their perception of that person. They're not getting a professional assessment of that person's abilities/ disabilities. They are using the information they know and making a decision of whether they want to meet them or not. Whether that's someone who appears very anxious or someone who can't spell/ appears to have dyslexia, etc, it's irrelevant. Sex isn't a protected status. People can choose who they do - or don't- want to fuck. Their reasons are personal to them. | |||
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"As long as that person doesn't drive slow and have her wallet ready at the till I wouldn't mind " | |||
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"Iam disabled I have been in a wheelchair for 5 years it doesn't stop us meeting some of those we meet do treat me like glass tho an I have to tell them just because I am in a chair I won't break " | |||
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"Just wondered how people would feel about swinging with disabled people. It personally wouldn't bother me. If I find the person sexy,it doesn't matter. " Not all disabilities are visible | |||
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"Just wondered how people would feel about swinging with disabled people. It personally wouldn't bother me. If I find the person sexy,it doesn't matter. " If they are in a wheelchair do i bring lube or wd40? | |||
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"Just wondered how people would feel about swinging with disabled people. It personally wouldn't bother me. If I find the person sexy,it doesn't matter. Not all disabilities are visible" Exactly this. Disabilities don't define people x | |||
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"Just wondered how people would feel about swinging with disabled people. It personally wouldn't bother me. If I find the person sexy,it doesn't matter. Not all disabilities are visible Exactly this. Disabilities don't define people x" Jo.Xx | |||
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"If someone stopped fancying me upon finding out I'm disabled then they're not really the type of person I would want to meet anyway." I quite agree. | |||
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"No issue at all with a physical handicap/ disability but being mentally impaired/ handicapped? No. I've had experience with people with mental illness in the past and it wasnt a good experience, I wish I could say different but that's a no for me x" There you go, you've just pushed back history 50 yrs by using "handicap" it is so 50s/60s. Any "handicapped person" would find that offensive. I always thought a handicap was used in Golf? | |||
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"If someone stopped fancying me upon finding out I'm disabled then they're not really the type of person I would want to meet anyway. I quite agree. " Agreed. | |||
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"Just wondered how people would feel about swinging with disabled people. It personally wouldn't bother me. If I find the person sexy,it doesn't matter. " Disability is vague. I’m disabled. But it doesn’t stop me from doing what I want, and making sure the girl I’m with is having a good time | |||
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