FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list

Back to The Lounge

The Oxford coma and my crippling fear of fucking up grammar!

Jump to newest

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

When writing to potential play partners, does anyone else constantly reread in the fear that you’ll come across as an illiterate moron?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No if they dont like it tuff i got better things to do than spellcheck

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

Yes i do. I'm always put too many haha or lol's, then when i read the conversation back i look like i'm deranged lolling at everything ............lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uciyassMan
over a year ago

sheffield

Jesus the title was enough to confuse be me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Jesus the title was enough to confuse be me

"

Then my work here is done!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Yes i do. I'm always put too many haha or lol's, then when i read the conversation back i look like i'm deranged lolling at everything ............lol

"

According to Kitty I use too many exclamation marks!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Comma. Just saying...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I don’t re-read and check much at all on here. I tend to post steam of consciousness messages and forum posts. So they often have typos, auto-corrections that are errors and unintended grammatical errors. If a recipient doesn’t like that we wouldn’t get on eventually, even if my first message had been error free. I apologise if I spot something after posting if I think it warrants it. But if I checked stuff I’d overthink them and it would lose it’s authenticity as I’d end up editing and self-censoring.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Comma. Just saying...

"

See, that’s what I mean!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for."

I think it has everything to do with it. It shows a level of care and diligence that could carry forward to the bedroom.

We’re not looking for perfection, but a little care taken?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No. I don’t re-read and check much at all on here. I tend to post steam of consciousness messages and forum posts. So they often have typos, auto-corrections that are errors and unintended grammatical errors. If a recipient doesn’t like that we wouldn’t get on eventually, even if my first message had been error free. I apologise if I spot something after posting if I think it warrants it. But if I checked stuff I’d overthink them and it would lose it’s authenticity as I’d end up editing and self-censoring."

Apologies for the two auto-correction errors in the above post ‘stream’ and ‘its’

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"No. I don’t re-read and check much at all on here. I tend to post steam of consciousness messages and forum posts. So they often have typos, auto-corrections that are errors and unintended grammatical errors. If a recipient doesn’t like that we wouldn’t get on eventually, even if my first message had been error free. I apologise if I spot something after posting if I think it warrants it. But if I checked stuff I’d overthink them and it would lose it’s authenticity as I’d end up editing and self-censoring.

Apologies for the two auto-correction errors in the above post ‘stream’ and ‘its’"

See! I’ve got in your head now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When writing to potential play partners, does anyone else constantly reread in the fear that you’ll come across as an illiterate moron?

"
no its just you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I'm dyslexic, I double check everything I write, although a few mistakes slip through, usually when my phone has decided to change a word or two

So, to me, spelling, grammar is important.

Someone sends me a message full of errors (I can tell the difference between someone who may have an issue & plain lazy writing) don't get me started on text chat!

Then it screams, lack of effort on their part.

If they can't be bothered to spend an extra minute on their writing, I tend to think they'd approach everything like that.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No. I don’t re-read and check much at all on here. I tend to post steam of consciousness messages and forum posts. So they often have typos, auto-corrections that are errors and unintended grammatical errors. If a recipient doesn’t like that we wouldn’t get on eventually, even if my first message had been error free. I apologise if I spot something after posting if I think it warrants it. But if I checked stuff I’d overthink them and it would lose it’s authenticity as I’d end up editing and self-censoring.

Apologies for the two auto-correction errors in the above post ‘stream’ and ‘its’

See! I’ve got in your head now. "

Nah that is what I normally do. I’ll see it after it has sent and immediately spot my errors. I’m happy to apologise for errors after sending but I don’t like what happens if I re-read stuff before sending. I used to have a habit of censoring myself that reduced my authenticity so I endeavour not to do it.

If I make a big blunder or is irritating me then I do the following: if it’s a message, I apologise and clarify my meaning; if it’s a forum post and I spot it in time, I delete and repost.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm dyslexic, I double check everything I write, although a few mistakes slip through, usually when my phone has decided to change a word or two

So, to me, spelling, grammar is important.

Someone sends me a message full of errors (I can tell the difference between someone who may have an issue & plain lazy writing) don't get me started on text chat!

Then it screams, lack of effort on their part.

If they can't be bothered to spend an extra minute on their writing, I tend to think they'd approach everything like that. "

I can understand given how much effort you put in my apparent laziness would be screaming at you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I (Luke) am usually very careful with forum posts but I still make mistakes.

Since your thread title mentions the Oxford Comma (ironically spelled wrong), I thought I'd share this quote from the Wikipedia article about the serial [Oxford] Comma...

The Times once published an unintentionally humorous description of a Peter Ustinov documentary, noting that "highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector". This would still be ambiguous if a serial comma were added, as Mandela could still be mistaken for a demigod, although he would be precluded from being a dildo collector.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"I (Luke) am usually very careful with forum posts but I still make mistakes.

Since your thread title mentions the Oxford Comma (ironically spelled wrong), I thought I'd share this quote from the Wikipedia article about the serial [Oxford] Comma...

The Times once published an unintentionally humorous description of a Peter Ustinov documentary, noting that "highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector". This would still be ambiguous if a serial comma were added, as Mandela could still be mistaken for a demigod, although he would be precluded from being a dildo collector."
great quote! Yes the spelling mistake is divinely ironic!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oxford commas are very rarely used and really unnecessary/wasted in normal messaging

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oxford commas are very rarely used and really unnecessary/wasted in normal messaging

"
I like them and I like the Oxford cobbles

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do your best that's all you can do but many browsers have inbuilt spell checkers so why not use them. The wording and the grammar is more important though there is nothing worse than a nonsensical message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?

I've seen those English dramas, too

They're cruel

So if there's any other way

To spell the word, it's fine with me

With me

Why would you speak to me that way?

Especially when I always said that I

Haven't got the words for you

All your diction, dripping with disdain

Through the pain, I always tell the truth

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford climber?

I climbed to Dharamsala, too

I did

I met the highest lama

His accent sounded fine to me

To me

Check your handbook, it's no trick

Take the chapstick, put it on your lips

Crack a smile, adjust my tie

Know your boyfriend, unlike other guys

Why would you lie about how much coal you have?

Why would you lie about something dumb like that?

Why would you lie about anything at all?

First the window, then it's to the wall

Little John, he always tells the truth

Check your passport, it's no trick

Take the Chapstick, put it on your lips

Crack a smile, adjust my tie

Know your butler, unlike other guys

Why would you lie about how much coal you have?

Why would you lie about something dumb like that?

Sorry couldn’t resist!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oxford commas are very rarely used and really unnecessary/wasted in normal messaging

I like them and I like the Oxford cobbles

"

Unnecessary though and really only used for lists

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oxford commas are very rarely used and really unnecessary/wasted in normal messaging

I like them and I like the Oxford cobbles

Unnecessary though and really only used for lists

"
I love Oxford went a few weeks back

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for."

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No if they dont like it tuff i got better things to do than spellcheck"

What else do you do apart from write bollocks on here ?!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No if they dont like it tuff i got better things to do than spellcheck

What else do you do apart from write bollocks on here ?!

"
work/see my kids/watch some sport or a movie drive west many things

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

"
omg I want to bowl you over with linguistics and paraphrasing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Who gives a fuck about an Oxford comma?

I've seen those English dramas, too

They're cruel

So if there's any other way

To spell the word, it's fine with me

With me

Why would you speak to me that way?

Especially when I always said that I

Haven't got the words for you

All your diction, dripping with disdain

Through the pain, I always tell the truth

Who gives a fuck about an Oxford climber?

I climbed to Dharamsala, too

I did

I met the highest lama

His accent sounded fine to me

To me

Check your handbook, it's no trick

Take the chapstick, put it on your lips

Crack a smile, adjust my tie

Know your boyfriend, unlike other guys

Why would you lie about how much coal you have?

Why would you lie about something dumb like that?

Why would you lie about anything at all?

First the window, then it's to the wall

Little John, he always tells the truth

Check your passport, it's no trick

Take the Chapstick, put it on your lips

Crack a smile, adjust my tie

Know your butler, unlike other guys

Why would you lie about how much coal you have?

Why would you lie about something dumb like that?

Sorry couldn’t resist!

"

Such a good song!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

"No if they dont like it tuff i got better things to do than spellcheck"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

I think it has everything to do with it. It shows a level of care and diligence that could carry forward to the bedroom.

We’re not looking for perfection, but a little care taken? "

On that basis one who has excellent grammar will have had regular health checks? So an uneducated person who struggles to spell or even read isn't going to be skilled in the bed? I'm struggling to see direct link to the bedroom at all other than maybe they'd be quite fixed and regimental in their bedroom approach. It's more about levels of education which also doesn't translate to the bedroom.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

"

As a sapiosexual I'm acutely aware of the effect it can have in how things progress. The excitement that someone is able to pen graphically images and emotions that entice the imagination of the reader. I can be switched off too by a single word which is frustrating at times and that switch is hard to flick back on afterwards.

My point to OP was that I don't necessarily see a direct link with articulation of language and sexual performance.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Comma or Coma OP ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When writing to potential play partners, does anyone else constantly reread in the fear that you’ll come across as an illiterate moron?

"

Absolutely. Several times.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Comma or Coma OP ?"
she's in a coma now it's very stressful

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

No. My writing isn't perfect all of the time but is perfect for them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fncya a, Fcku..!?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fncya a, Fcku..!?"

Durty talkn again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

especially if contacting someone clearly articulate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *qua vitaeWoman
over a year ago

Shropshire/Midlands

"When writing to potential play partners, does anyone else constantly reread in the fear that you’ll come across as an illiterate moron?

"

I’m always proofreading my posts and messages. It stems back from uni and having daily sex.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm learning not to beat myself up about it. Most of the time.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

No, I don't proof on here. I am then mortified (yes, mortified) when I spot typos and errors.

I am a bit slap-dash here.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I am partial to a vocative comma.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I am partial to a vocative comma.

"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

As a sapiosexual I'm acutely aware of the effect it can have in how things progress. The excitement that someone is able to pen graphically images and emotions that entice the imagination of the reader. I can be switched off too by a single word which is frustrating at times and that switch is hard to flick back on afterwards.

My point to OP was that I don't necessarily see a direct link with articulation of language and sexual performance."

Well yes, I do see what you’re saying. I guess we all have different things that do it for us and not.

Intrigued now by what single word flicked your switch to off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

As a sapiosexual I'm acutely aware of the effect it can have in how things progress. The excitement that someone is able to pen graphically images and emotions that entice the imagination of the reader. I can be switched off too by a single word which is frustrating at times and that switch is hard to flick back on afterwards.

My point to OP was that I don't necessarily see a direct link with articulation of language and sexual performance.

Well yes, I do see what you’re saying. I guess we all have different things that do it for us and not.

Intrigued now by what single word flicked your switch to off

"

Probably moist. Wasn't that voted the word people like least?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atandasmileMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Comma. Just saying...

"

I just had a giggle at the idea of being so fearful of grammar mistakes that they might put one into an Oxford coma

.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *xmfrvnMan
over a year ago

Stoke-on-Trent

"Comma. Just saying...

I just had a giggle at the idea of being so fearful of grammar mistakes that they might put one into an Oxford coma

."

Sounds like a case for Morse. Pretty slow case.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

I think it has everything to do with it. It shows a level of care and diligence that could carry forward to the bedroom.

We’re not looking for perfection, but a little care taken? "

People with posh writing skills are better in bed.

What snobby kind of shite is this?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

As a fan of good grammar, I can assure you that you’d be amazed at the effect really well written exchanges can have on how things progress

As a sapiosexual I'm acutely aware of the effect it can have in how things progress. The excitement that someone is able to pen graphically images and emotions that entice the imagination of the reader. I can be switched off too by a single word which is frustrating at times and that switch is hard to flick back on afterwards.

Intrigued now by what single word flicked your switch to off

Probably moist. Wasn't that voted the word people like least?

"

I was going to suggest that but then I thought it was probably women that were most bothered by it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must admit, the proper use of a semicolon gives me a throbbing erection.

So much so that I might even message the user without properly reading their profile first (and include an unsolicited dick pic)!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I must admit, the proper use of a semicolon gives me a throbbing erection.

So much so that I might even message the user without properly reading their profile first (and include an unsolicited dick pic)!"

With a semi?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must admit, the proper use of a semicolon gives me a throbbing erection.

So much so that I might even message the user without properly reading their profile first (and include an unsolicited dick pic)!

With a semi? "

Hmm I think the same rules apply with grammar as they do with dick pics: when in doubt go full!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *agenta400Woman
over a year ago

All over the shop

Yes. Proofreading is crucial. I also judge others by their literacy standards but then I am a wicked domme.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A well-written message will hasten a positive reply. Everyone has their own fickle preferences and grammar is as good as any.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *JohnMan
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

All you have here are your pictures and your words. If you want to attract attention and make an impression, those are your tools.

Your words are both what you say and how you say it. If the content is compelling enough, I'll make the effort to read it. But if I'm confronted by a wall of text from someone who has never heard of paragraphs and thinks spelling and punctuation take too much effort, I might not get that far. It's about consideration for the other person.

However. Insisting on good writing is also elitist. I believe the ability to write well is strongly influenced by the reading that one does, and not everyone has the luxury of being able to do a lot of reading. This does not make them bad people, but they will be at an unfair disadvantage in a mostly written medium.

And yet, if I can borrow someone's hand for a third, we do tend to gather into tribes. I'm more likely to get on with (or take less effort to get on with) people who are more like me. Those people will read a lot, and that will be reflected in their writing. It's a short-cut that we take.

So, yes, I will judge you on your use of semicolons. I won't like myself for it. But life is short.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

"Nope. If grammar mistakes put someone off then they're not for me. I'm open to a debate on this but don't think grammar has much correlation to what we're all here for.

I think it has everything to do with it. It shows a level of care and diligence that could carry forward to the bedroom.

We’re not looking for perfection, but a little care taken?

People with posh writing skills are better in bed.

What snobby kind of shite is this?"

You’ve completely missed the point, ergo you’ve self unselected.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittyandtheboy OP Couple
over a year ago

Back of the bins.

I would go through and personally reply to you all! However, I think I can sum up in a general reply. The problem with grammar is my problem with my grammar. I do, however, need to be able to read the other person or persons message! Up to you what you do!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I have been mildly troubled by some of the posts not having any commas at all.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread

back to top