FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Dating apps vs Swinger Sites

Jump to newest
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London

Which one is better? Tell me about your experience.

*deleted the previous post by mistake*

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just had a similar chat with someone on here. I guess dating you have to go through the whole uncomfortable rigmarole of courting whereas here is exactly what it says in the tin and you can indicate your preferences in advance.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Might also add, from what I’ve seen (including another swinger site) they seem to be geared toward generating income first, partnerships second. Lots of fake profiles that you have to then subscribe to a higher lever to see etc.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Have no luck on either lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have far more luck on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble and Hinge than here.

Simple reason being that I can be more open and honest on a forum like a dating app than a swinging site where I have to hide my identity.

Then there's an implication that sex is on the cards when you match on apps and do go on a date but you just have to be a gentleman and not disrespectful.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London

My personal experience has been pretty much the same. Especially when comparing single ladies from dating apps and from fabs. If I include couples and parties, than I have had way more sex from swinger sites. Women will be women regardless of the platform. I think most guys make the mistake to think that just because it's a sex site they just need to snap their fingers to get laid.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

Do you use the dating sites for sex then as you would fab OP?

When on the dating sites it is to date... Here I very rarely meet now because I woukd prefer to date. So was just curious. Obviously I know from the dating sites that a lot of people do just want casual or NSA.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"I have far more luck on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble and Hinge than here.

Simple reason being that I can be more open and honest on a forum like a dating app than a swinging site where I have to hide my identity.

Then there's an implication that sex is on the cards when you match on apps and do go on a date but you just have to be a gentleman and not disrespectful."

Back in 2014, Tinder was great. Used to have 5 to 10 matches a day, several dates and sex on first date. The glorious days. Now it became more of a business. If you want results you have to pay. Might give it a try and get the gold version in the future.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I've not used dating sites, but I'd do it a whole lot differently to here. A lot slower. And I'm slow for Fab!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have far more luck on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble and Hinge than here.

Simple reason being that I can be more open and honest on a forum like a dating app than a swinging site where I have to hide my identity.

Then there's an implication that sex is on the cards when you match on apps and do go on a date but you just have to be a gentleman and not disrespectful.

Back in 2014, Tinder was great. Used to have 5 to 10 matches a day, several dates and sex on first date. The glorious days. Now it became more of a business. If you want results you have to pay. Might give it a try and get the gold version in the future."

I'm using the free versions of all 3 dating apps I frequent and it's still fine.

I think the secret is to swipe right selectively, take a little time looking at the profiles and not to be using the apps too often.

They've kept me fairly busy this summer to be honest - a lot of dates have turned into one-night stands and FWB situations.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for "

Not all women want to be wined and dined.. But just to meet a genuine man for dates as well as sex...

This has enlightened me even more about the reality of dating apps

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating apps are full of men who lie about everything just to get their dick wet.

On here their first message tells me everything I need to know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"Dating apps are full of men who lie about everything just to get their dick wet.

On here their first message tells me everything I need to know. "

Hahaha very true...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

Not all women want to be wined and dined.. But just to meet a genuine man for dates as well as sex...

This has enlightened me even more about the reality of dating apps "

Just to be clear - if and when I've really hit it off with girls I've met on dating apps it's (a couple of times actually) turned into a relationship.

All dating apps have really done is broaden the net so we can meet people outside of our immediate peer circles which has been great.

Always open to firming up my relationships with people who are so awesome I want to spend time outside the bedroom with them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have had more success on dating apps than on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for "

If im dating i go dutch on dates

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"Do you use the dating sites for sex then as you would fab OP?

When on the dating sites it is to date... Here I very rarely meet now because I woukd prefer to date. So was just curious. Obviously I know from the dating sites that a lot of people do just want casual or NSA.

"

The approach is different but of course if you find someone attractive you want to have sex with that person. I think 90% of people on dating sites are simply looking for sex anyways. The thing is with women especially, they need to be very selective as they have a way bigger pool of options than men. I would say something like 100 to 1.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

"

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

"

Me too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally have had more luck on here than with dating sites. Plus the majority of men I’ve seen on dating sites are on here too. I do think it’s easier to be more open about what your after. Plus the verification on here helps out most of the fakes.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

Not all women want to be wined and dined.. But just to meet a genuine man for dates as well as sex...

This has enlightened me even more about the reality of dating apps

Just to be clear - if and when I've really hit it off with girls I've met on dating apps it's (a couple of times actually) turned into a relationship.

All dating apps have really done is broaden the net so we can meet people outside of our immediate peer circles which has been great.

Always open to firming up my relationships with people who are so awesome I want to spend time outside the bedroom with them."

I think this is gender neutral... I think everyone has their own agenda for what they are hoping for on fab and away. I like the openness that fab brings in terms of your sexulity and what you enjoy.. But the chance of meeting anyone who wants to date on here seems slim.. On the vanilla dating sites I find it hard because I'm a sexual person and want that to be a big part of what I'm looking for I darent be too open otherwise it seems your just an easy lay or open to been taken advantage of.. So all in all its a mindfield...haha but I'm really glad you have had some success xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!"

Or she's just into the equality thing?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!

Or she's just into the equality thing? "

Fair enough - haven't met many women in London who've insisted on it though and have been happy to foot the bill as I do ok for myself.

The couple of occasions I've gone Dutch a second date never transpired.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

Not all women want to be wined and dined.. But just to meet a genuine man for dates as well as sex...

This has enlightened me even more about the reality of dating apps "

I always keep my first dates simple, fun and cheap. A nice happy hour, with some latin dance music and grab a slice of pizza afterwards. Works every time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating sites gave me my two previous fwb in under a year. 3+ years on here....not so much as a snog.....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think this is gender neutral... I think everyone has their own agenda for what they are hoping for on fab and away. I like the openness that fab brings in terms of your sexulity and what you enjoy.. But the chance of meeting anyone who wants to date on here seems slim.. On the vanilla dating sites I find it hard because I'm a sexual person and want that to be a big part of what I'm looking for I darent be too open otherwise it seems your just an easy lay or open to been taken advantage of.. So all in all its a mindfield...haha but I'm really glad you have had some success xx"

See I find you can't be too open on Fab as it's a swinger site so your anonymity is required to protect you whereas on dating apps I am open about being sexual without being a lech.

I see a woman's perspective in that you have to screen men and ensure they're not just looking for sex if you want something long-term though. I think it's then a case of doing the courting dance and slowly opening up to your partner.

Just a shame we still live in a world where sex is so taboo.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"I personally have had more luck on here than with dating sites. Plus the majority of men I’ve seen on dating sites are on here too. I do think it’s easier to be more open about what your after. Plus the verification on here helps out most of the fakes. "

Great point about the verifications. That really helps to avoid fakes and timewasters. Nice one.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!

Or she's just into the equality thing?

Fair enough - haven't met many women in London who've insisted on it though and have been happy to foot the bill as I do ok for myself.

The couple of occasions I've gone Dutch a second date never transpired."

I rarely push the issue in the moment, it's rude/ awkward. But it is important to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Do you use the dating sites for sex then as you would fab OP?

When on the dating sites it is to date... Here I very rarely meet now because I woukd prefer to date. So was just curious. Obviously I know from the dating sites that a lot of people do just want casual or NSA.

"

And they lie just to get casual or nsa on dating sites.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"I think this is gender neutral... I think everyone has their own agenda for what they are hoping for on fab and away. I like the openness that fab brings in terms of your sexulity and what you enjoy.. But the chance of meeting anyone who wants to date on here seems slim.. On the vanilla dating sites I find it hard because I'm a sexual person and want that to be a big part of what I'm looking for I darent be too open otherwise it seems your just an easy lay or open to been taken advantage of.. So all in all its a mindfield...haha but I'm really glad you have had some success xx

See I find you can't be too open on Fab as it's a swinger site so your anonymity is required to protect you whereas on dating apps I am open about being sexual without being a lech.

I see a woman's perspective in that you have to screen men and ensure they're not just looking for sex if you want something long-term though. I think it's then a case of doing the courting dance and slowly opening up to your partner.

Just a shame we still live in a world where sex is so taboo."

That's interesting that you feel able to be more open on normal dating sites sexually.. I really don't.. And I find the whole thing tiring especially when so many times you chat and invest time "getting to know someone" and then they just disappear. I agree the anonminity on here. Workwise I have to be careful bit sometimes I rebel a bit and show my face on my profile.. But I just send my face pics straight away when messaging someone, which solves the what do you look like issue haha x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London

I usually pay for the drinks or dinner when I'm on a date. Especially if it's a place that I recommended. But ladies at least do the "fake" move that you're getting your wallet out of your purse please. That's all I ask lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull


"I usually pay for the drinks or dinner when I'm on a date. Especially if it's a place that I recommended. But ladies at least do the "fake" move that you're getting your wallet out of your purse please. That's all I ask lol"

I always ask and offer

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!

Or she's just into the equality thing?

Fair enough - haven't met many women in London who've insisted on it though and have been happy to foot the bill as I do ok for myself.

The couple of occasions I've gone Dutch a second date never transpired."

I earn a good wage but 50/50

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilvioDanteInferno OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"I usually pay for the drinks or dinner when I'm on a date. Especially if it's a place that I recommended. But ladies at least do the "fake" move that you're getting your wallet out of your purse please. That's all I ask lol

I always ask and offer "

Good girl lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't want to date so, here is where is best for me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That's interesting that you feel able to be more open on normal dating sites sexually.. I really don't.. And I find the whole thing tiring especially when so many times you chat and invest time "getting to know someone" and then they just disappear. I agree the anonminity on here. Workwise I have to be careful bit sometimes I rebel a bit and show my face on my profile.. But I just send my face pics straight away when messaging someone, which solves the what do you look like issue haha x"

I am more able to show people what I look like and express who I am on dating apps for sure because they've become such a part of the popular culture zeitgeist that it's absolutely the norm to be on them whereas it's more risqué to be a member here.

I should clarify that when I 'open up' I just let girls know I'm looking for casual relationships at first - if things are great and we click then I'll look to include them in my life more but if there's not then it's about the mutual physical attraction.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

If im dating i go dutch on dates

I always took that as a bad sign - as if a woman really wanted to ensure I couldn't be chivalrous to avoid me potentially getting the wrong idea!

Or she's just into the equality thing?

Fair enough - haven't met many women in London who've insisted on it though and have been happy to foot the bill as I do ok for myself.

The couple of occasions I've gone Dutch a second date never transpired."

I am extremely uncomfortable if I don't pay for myself, whomever I am out with... I have never dated tho

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for "

This is a pretty strange generalisation

People use dating apps for sex too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *racy_JacksWoman
over a year ago

Derby

I tend to try to keep these separate and use this site (or organised socials) for sex and dating sites for dating.

In my pre Fab days I used dating sites for sex and found it much more hit and miss than on here. People here are more likely on my wavelength and I can check out verifications. There's no way I'd use dating apps specifically to find sex nowadays

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only ever used fab and almost worn my cock out

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I have more chance of meeting someone for sex with a dating app.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Depends what your aim is; just causal sex or activity on the scene.

There was a time I was just enjoying casual NSA sex. I found great success on dating site such as POF, tinder and Ok cupid. That is the best place for NSA hook ups in my experience. Because I guess many people are not swingers (so fab does not appeal) but are looking for hook up. Genrally in my experience just for a short period of time, often after a break up from a long term relationship and/or like my self busy single parents.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No desire to date at all so no desire to use a dating app

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No desire to date at all so no desire to use a dating app"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No desire to date at all so no desire to use a dating app"

I only tried maybe 3 different dating sites. All gave preference options for nsa sex and casual relationships plus other options, so I don't really see the difference to here..?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Free dating sites in my experience are full of the same people who are on here mostly, I haven’t found either to be a lot different in what people are looking for. The only thing I noticed on dating sites is that some were a lot more judgmental when the subject of sex came up!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No desire to date at all so no desire to use a dating app

I only tried maybe 3 different dating sites. All gave preference options for nsa sex and casual relationships plus other options, so I don't really see the difference to here..?"

I don't have any problems with fab so don't see any need to join a dating site and muddy the waters. I'm a swinger so joined a swingers site. I expect nothing else on here. People looking to date are not on my radar. I wouldn't expect to find them on a swingers site. Of course they've every right to be here just not for me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry


"Free dating sites in my experience are full of the same people who are on here mostly, I haven’t found either to be a lot different in what people are looking for. The only thing I noticed on dating sites is that some were a lot more judgmental when the subject of sex came up!"

In terms of judgment and expectation on dating site with regards to sex I've found talking about sex to be a problematic issuse. Especially in terms of dating. Because sexual compatability is important too, especially if you have kinks or are not sexaully monogomus. You don't want to waste each others time getting to know each other if there is no compatibility. But if you state sexual prefrence on a normsl dating site:

Male doing so = Sex pest with no real desire to find a partner.

Female doing so = woman who's mad for it, easy and open to all sorts of propositions and unsolicited cock shots.

So any talk of sexual prefrence/desire is detrimental to your chances of successful dating and people judge you and draw wrong conclusion. Yet sex is just as valid area of comparability as other areas in terms of relationships. That why I like OK Cupid because you state your open mindedness and desire as part of the compatibility questions to help match you. Also I found on OK Cupid there where a lot more open minded types and also people seeking a wide range of relationship formats. I think if your looking for a relationship and to stay in the lifestyle here on fab and through the scene is the best place to look.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I use pof dating prefer fab

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too be total honest both dating apps and swinger site seem a waste of time for most out there. i would bring back the old days where face to face is far better

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Too be total honest both dating apps and swinger site seem a waste of time for most out there. i would bring back the old days where face to face is far better "

Nothing stopping you venturing into real world. Many don't seem to get this. The internet is a facilitator for many but isn't the only way and certainly isn't for everyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Free dating sites in my experience are full of the same people who are on here mostly, I haven’t found either to be a lot different in what people are looking for. The only thing I noticed on dating sites is that some were a lot more judgmental when the subject of sex came up!

In terms of judgment and expectation on dating site with regards to sex I've found talking about sex to be a problematic issuse. Especially in terms of dating. Because sexual compatability is important too, especially if you have kinks or are not sexaully monogomus. You don't want to waste each others time getting to know each other if there is no compatibility. But if you state sexual prefrence on a normsl dating site:

Male doing so = Sex pest with no real desire to find a partner.

Female doing so = woman who's mad for it, easy and open to all sorts of propositions and unsolicited cock shots.

So any talk of sexual prefrence/desire is detrimental to your chances of successful dating and people judge you and draw wrong conclusion. Yet sex is just as valid area of comparability as other areas in terms of relationships. That why I like OK Cupid because you state your open mindedness and desire as part of the compatibility questions to help match you. Also I found on OK Cupid there where a lot more open minded types and also people seeking a wide range of relationship formats. I think if your looking for a relationship and to stay in the lifestyle here on fab and through the scene is the best place to look."

Isn't that what dates are for? To see what you both like? Eventually the topic of sex will come up. I personally wouldn't go into detail of my likes and dislikes online or in an app, would rather do that in person.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Free dating sites in my experience are full of the same people who are on here mostly, I haven’t found either to be a lot different in what people are looking for. The only thing I noticed on dating sites is that some were a lot more judgmental when the subject of sex came up!

In terms of judgment and expectation on dating site with regards to sex I've found talking about sex to be a problematic issuse. Especially in terms of dating. Because sexual compatability is important too, especially if you have kinks or are not sexaully monogomus. You don't want to waste each others time getting to know each other if there is no compatibility. But if you state sexual prefrence on a normsl dating site:

Male doing so = Sex pest with no real desire to find a partner.

Female doing so = woman who's mad for it, easy and open to all sorts of propositions and unsolicited cock shots.

So any talk of sexual prefrence/desire is detrimental to your chances of successful dating and people judge you and draw wrong conclusion. Yet sex is just as valid area of comparability as other areas in terms of relationships. That why I like OK Cupid because you state your open mindedness and desire as part of the compatibility questions to help match you. Also I found on OK Cupid there where a lot more open minded types and also people seeking a wide range of relationship formats. I think if your looking for a relationship and to stay in the lifestyle here on fab and through the scene is the best place to look."

Yes exactly this and it doesn’t seem to matter when the subject of sex crops up before or after meeting once or a few times, it’s always the same, at least here you don’t have to explain but it can be harder here to strike a normal conversation when there’s less to go on on a profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hy_bangor_bi-girlWoman
over a year ago

Bangor

My friend swears by P. O. F.

He says its easier than here to pull, all the frustrated single mums lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Too be total honest both dating apps and swinger site seem a waste of time for most out there. i would bring back the old days where face to face is far better

Nothing stopping you venturing into real world. Many don't seem to get this. The internet is a facilitator for many but isn't the only way and certainly isn't for everyone "
there is no real world anymore because everyone relies on technology these days to get anywhere in the real world

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Isn't that what dates are for? To see what you both like? Eventually the topic of sex will come up. I personally wouldn't go into detail of my likes and dislikes online or in an app, would rather do that in person."

That's how it is for me too if I meet someone online.

I'll message, call and then arrange a date. If there's a mutual attraction and we are flirting we can amp up the sex chat. No need to pre-empt it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"there is no real world anymore because everyone relies on technology these days to get anywhere in the real world "

I met my primary on the train on the way home from work!

Amazing how much life can give back if you open up.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry


"Free dating sites in my experience are full of the same people who are on here mostly, I haven’t found either to be a lot different in what people are looking for. The only thing I noticed on dating sites is that some were a lot more judgmental when the subject of sex came up!

In terms of judgment and expectation on dating site with regards to sex I've found talking about sex to be a problematic issuse. Especially in terms of dating. Because sexual compatability is important too, especially if you have kinks or are not sexaully monogomus. You don't want to waste each others time getting to know each other if there is no compatibility. But if you state sexual prefrence on a normsl dating site:

Male doing so = Sex pest with no real desire to find a partner.

Female doing so = woman who's mad for it, easy and open to all sorts of propositions and unsolicited cock shots.

So any talk of sexual prefrence/desire is detrimental to your chances of successful dating and people judge you and draw wrong conclusion. Yet sex is just as valid area of comparability as other areas in terms of relationships. That why I like OK Cupid because you state your open mindedness and desire as part of the compatibility questions to help match you. Also I found on OK Cupid there where a lot more open minded types and also people seeking a wide range of relationship formats. I think if your looking for a relationship and to stay in the lifestyle here on fab and through the scene is the best place to look.

Isn't that what dates are for? To see what you both like? Eventually the topic of sex will come up. I personally wouldn't go into detail of my likes and dislikes online or in an app, would rather do that in person."

But isn't the point of online dating profiles a way to help both parties filter potential candidates? People state preferences for things like age, educational background, life out look etc. Why not sexual preference? It's not about revealing all the inner details of your sex life. More a case of say swinging or BDSM or exhibitionism,

Crossdressing, etc were essential parts of what you where looking for in terms of sexual compatability what wrong with stating a preference. Like other aspects surely online dating is supposed to help find suitability. Maybe not so much for the more vanilla in society but this is a real issue for many of us who are less conventional in our sexual desires and appitites. By not being able to be open about sex from the start on a profile I see three outcomes:

1. Lots of wasted time getting to know each other, liking each other only to find out weeks later you sexually repulse each other.

2. Someone represses a side to their sexuality because once they've fallen for someone and got to know them they've realised that person would be repulsed by their true sexual desire. Often resulting is disastrous effects years down the line and hurt for both parties.

3. By a slim chance turns out that the other person also shares the same niche sexual desire.

I find our attitudes in this society towards sex, judgement and talking about sex problematic. And I think the effects of our attitudes often results in harmful effects in terms of the relationships formed and their future down the road.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ddit...Man
over a year ago

Land of the giants... ;-)

It really depends on what you are looking for.

I am looking for a lot of fun, could be long term but with no pressure.. so.. I am here..

If I was looking for a long term relationship then id be on a dating site..

Only really experience this site...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Im very popular on dating sites, but they actually move very fast, they go from hello to bf/gf in one or two dates.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Too be total honest both dating apps and swinger site seem a waste of time for most out there. i would bring back the old days where face to face is far better

Nothing stopping you venturing into real world. Many don't seem to get this. The internet is a facilitator for many but isn't the only way and certainly isn't for everyone there is no real world anymore because everyone relies on technology these days to get anywhere in the real world "

There are always going to be losers in life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I usually pay for the drinks or dinner when I'm on a date. Especially if it's a place that I recommended. But ladies at least do the "fake" move that you're getting your wallet out of your purse please. That's all I ask lol"

This makes it sound like you pay grudgingly

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Wherever I use, I make it clear that I'm enjoying casual fun, as I find it tedious to have to interpret hidden motives but others can find me. It's a pity that dating apps have the connotations of dates, rather than primarily sex

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"It really depends on what you are looking for.

I am looking for a lot of fun, could be long term but with no pressure.. so.. I am here..

If I was looking for a long term relationship then id be on a dating site..

Only really experience this site... "

Theres no difference. Men just flower it up more but most only want NSA. The same as here lots of people are married or in relationship trying to play away from home.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I’ve used dating apps and sites im looking for girls to date and possibly a relationship.

I’ve had most of my meets stood me up and I’ve ended up having dinners or having to carry on with the date on my own.

I’ve learnt to enjoy myself when I get let down so Im used to it by Now.

On here using the site for sex. It does have people that will stood you up or are just fakes but I’ve had a fair few meets that have kept their word and turned up.

Plus there are swinging clubs and events to go to if you want to meet people in person instead of just chatting online.

In my experience fab takes it but it’s shame that the dating apps haven’t worked out for me when I’ve been looking for something more intimate and serious.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm on Bumble and every single guy has started with the pretense of wanting to date me...then always when it boils down to it they just want sex...I've had my heart broken a few times I can tell you!! At least on FAB we're all here for the same reason...and I'm loving it!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive noticed that online sites are the same for both sexes,

People playing games, people after sex odd few looking to date with a view for a relationship

my pof account has been hidden for a while now as im dating someone (met him in the real world)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London


"Dating apps full of women who are looking to be taken out wined and dined as many times as they can.

Swinging site at least has women who are mostly up front and spell out what they are looking for

Not all women want to be wined and dined.. But just to meet a genuine man for dates as well as sex...

This has enlightened me even more about the reality of dating apps

I always keep my first dates simple, fun and cheap. A nice happy hour, with some latin dance music and grab a slice of pizza afterwards. Works every time. "

Did someone say Latin dance music? I think I need to date you. And I know good places!

To the subject of the thread: it is interesting how a lot of answers are about the people who have written them rather than the question asked.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top