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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea" people can ask us anything we are very open  the only thing we ask is don't be afraid to tell us what you really think and want. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea people can ask us anything we are very open the only thing we ask is don't be afraid to tell us what you really think and want. "Yes, good one. We want the other person to fulfil their fantasies too | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. " That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is " | |||
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Via message - as others have said, talk to us both, at least initially until it's clear who you're talking to.
On the forum - we operate as individuals, so just as you would speak to anyone really! We don't use the forums with a view to meeting, it's just for fun. I feel like it's the equivalent of being in the pub
Mrs TMN x | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. " It's really difficult for singles to approach couples, we understand that. We tend to try and go with the flow | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. "  | |||
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"Make it clear which one you're talking to.. then treat them the same as everyone else?" | |||
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D. | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is "FYI Meli - we're both good with you being as forward as you like 
Mr and Mrs TMN x | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D."Oops. It was me who just posted ^^ Red | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D."I reeeeaaaallllyyyy wanted to not sign off that post 
D. | |||
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"An obvious one, but one a lot of men forget - always address a couple as a couple! " This sometimes wont work. I always start off a message to a couple by saying 'hi you two' but have had loads not even reply. | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
Oops. It was me who just posted ^^
Red"
D. | |||
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"An obvious one, but one a lot of men forget - always address a couple as a couple! This sometimes wont work. I always start off a message to a couple by saying 'hi you two' but have had loads not even reply." They might not reply for other reasons? Mrs TMN x | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is "Make your mind up! You were one of the ones saying it last night 
I think that for the intent of just chit chat, it's a simple case of messaging as you would anyone else. If it's flirty chat, softly softly is often the best practise, don't go in with a 5000 word erotic fiction poem about the ladies ass. | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
I reeeeaaaallllyyyy wanted to not sign off that post
D."M is usually the one who doesn't sign off here!
Red | |||
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"Make it clear which one you're talking to.. then treat them the same as everyone else?" Bingo! | |||
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"Make it clear which one you're talking to.. then treat them the same as everyone else? Bingo! " I'm confused now. Should they be addressed as a couple or should we make it clear we're only addressing one?  | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is
FYI Meli - we're both good with you being as forward as you like
Mr and Mrs TMN x"Perfect.  | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D."Agreed. I generally sign off the first few messages, after that it should be clear. The same with threads, I would think that as I started the thread, it would be clear that I'm posting? | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
I reeeeaaaallllyyyy wanted to not sign off that post
D.
M is usually the one who doesn't sign off here!
Red"Yes I do! | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is
Make your mind up!
You were one of the ones saying it last night
I think that for the intent of just chit chat, it's a simple case of messaging as you would anyone else. If it's flirty chat, softly softly is often the best practise, don't go in with a 5000 word erotic fiction poem about the ladies ass. "Ass? No. I wouldn't do that. Maybe her arse. 
I do know how to talk to some people Tea. Maybe. | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D."I was going to say this. Sometimes it's really not clear. I remember asking a couple once who I was talking to and the reply was "does it matter you will meet us both so you don't need to know" | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
Agreed.
I generally sign off the first few messages, after that it should be clear. The same with threads, I would think that as I started the thread, it would be clear that I'm posting? " | |||
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"An obvious one, but one a lot of men forget - always address a couple as a couple! This sometimes wont work. I always start off a message to a couple by saying 'hi you two' but have had loads not even reply. They might not reply for other reasons? Mrs TMN x" Exactly this. Getting the etiquette correct is only part of it. If the couple aren't interested then even the best message may well not garner a reply. | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
I was going to say this.
Sometimes it's really not clear. I remember asking a couple once who I was talking to and the reply was "does it matter you will meet us both so you don't need to know"
"Oh that's a bit disconcerting! Mrs TMN x | |||
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"I don't find it *that* difficult. I'm quite good at talking to different people. It's just when you have to switch tone etc. People are different, even in couples and a good conversation requires engaging with that tone. I guess sometimes I think "oh no, can't be too forward" in case one half is fine with it, the other is
Make your mind up!
You were one of the ones saying it last night
I think that for the intent of just chit chat, it's a simple case of messaging as you would anyone else. If it's flirty chat, softly softly is often the best practise, don't go in with a 5000 word erotic fiction poem about the ladies ass.
Ass? No. I wouldn't do that. Maybe her arse.
I do know how to talk to some people Tea. Maybe."The last paragraph wasn't for your benefit, you clearly don't need help in chatting to folks | |||
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"Make it clear which one you're talking to.. then treat them the same as everyone else? Bingo! I'm confused now. Should they be addressed as a couple or should we make it clear we're only addressing one? "I aways think if a single is messing the couple first, address them both. If a couple is messaging a single first signing off with which one you are is the best approach. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea" Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about? | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. " Most of the time it's not stated who has posted in the actual post, how are we supposed to know who to address in that case? | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. Most of the time it's not stated who has posted in the actual post, how are we supposed to know who to address in that case? " You won't know. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about?" Ladies are simply much nicer to look at but most male halves know that the main attraction is always going to be the female (rightly or wrongly) but we do try and add a sprinkling of joint photos in our profile | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. Most of the time it's not stated who has posted in the actual post, how are we supposed to know who to address in that case? You won't know. " In which case address both. I think the art of knowing how to communicate is dying. It really needn't be complicated or need rules!! | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about?" Depends on the set up of the couple surely? I do meet alone as well as with Mr so there are more pics of me. Mrs TMN x | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about? Ladies are simply much nicer to look at but most male halves know that the main attraction is always going to be the female (rightly or wrongly) but we do try and add a sprinkling of joint photos in our profile "This is exactly what Mr says when I try to get more pics of him up! | |||
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"An obvious one, but one a lot of men forget - always address a couple as a couple! " | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about? Ladies are simply much nicer to look at but most male halves know that the main attraction is always going to be the female (rightly or wrongly) but we do try and add a sprinkling of joint photos in our profile "If people want a straight swop o need to see the guy. If I can't without asking it ain't happening. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about?" I thought it was fairly obvious but not everyone is the same and after my thread last night, a few expressed this issue. As for couples with just pictures of the lady, there are lots of reasons | |||
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"Why would a single person find it hard to speak to a couple?! They a different species." Because it can be complex and requires attention and nuance, it can be intimidating for some. I think that one on one messages are easier so some stick to that maybe. | |||
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"All we ask is if you want to meet us you include both of us in your messages. Just write bearing in mind both of us will read it. That's a good point, it does irk me if random messages come through for one or the other. However, if it's in response to a forum post from one of us, it makes sense to address the one that posted. Most of the time it's not stated who has posted in the actual post, how are we supposed to know who to address in that case? You won't know. In which case address both. I think the art of knowing how to communicate is dying. It really needn't be complicated or need rules!!" It shouldn't be, but it seems to require it, so here we are! | |||
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"Why would a single person find it hard to speak to a couple?! They a different species. Because it can be complex and requires attention and nuance, it can be intimidating for some. I think that one on one messages are easier so some stick to that maybe. " I agree I think also some couples profiles make a lot of demands. It is also easier to talk to one person only | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Well it’s obvious isn’t it? Approach a couple, send a message or in person chat to ‘both’ of them. I really don’t understand why it’s confusing! It’s not just about the woman of the couple, however I have noticed most couple profiles mainly use the lady in the photos to attract. What’s that about? Ladies are simply much nicer to look at but most male halves know that the main attraction is always going to be the female (rightly or wrongly) but we do try and add a sprinkling of joint photos in our profile
If people want a straight swop o need to see the guy. If I can't without asking it ain't happening. "I agree. Inherently the ladies will get more attention as guys fab more and are more expressive regarding interest, so for some they take that as a reason to not put male pictures up. | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea." | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea." Is that Lacey? | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea." If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea. If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. " Which one of you has replied? See my point? Couples don’t start the communication properly! I’ve no idea now who wrote your comment? Mr or Mrs? Simple to just sign off who...... | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea. If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. Which one of you has replied? See my point? Couples don’t start the communication properly! I’ve no idea now who wrote your comment? Mr or Mrs? Simple to just sign off who......" Does it matter in this context, though? You're just having a chat on the forum. Not the same thing as receiving a first message saying "nice tits" or similar.
Mrs TMN x | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea. If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. Which one of you has replied? See my point? Couples don’t start the communication properly! I’ve no idea now who wrote your comment? Mr or Mrs? Simple to just sign off who...... Does it matter in this context, though? You're just having a chat on the forum. Not the same thing as receiving a first message saying "nice tits" or similar.
Mrs TMN x"True but when I read the forum posts from couples I always assume it’s the female writing it but it’s still communication! The first message should be addressed to both of you, the sender is lacking in intelligence by writing ‘nice tits’ or similar! I would block such a person.... | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, *** if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. *** I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea." I agree with all this, especially ***. And your last sentence. | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D.
Agreed.
I generally sign off the first few messages, after that it should be clear. The same with threads, I would think that as I started the thread, it would be clear that I'm posting? "Ye, I agree with that, I think that’s where the being conscious part comes in, although I think I still always sign off, just in case
D.
Ps- really wanted to not sign off again | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea. If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. Which one of you has replied? See my point? Couples don’t start the communication properly! I’ve no idea now who wrote your comment? Mr or Mrs? Simple to just sign off who......" I started the thread, so I would've thought it was clear. | |||
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"I personally think you’re all over complicating what is a very simple skill of communication. We don’t want to tell anyone how to communicate with us, we want to see your personality in the messages. The ones we’ve met and have made plans to meet are the ones who shine in their communications, if we make public the things we look for then it’ll completely devalue every message we’ll ever receive. I rarely sign anything off as I want you to get to know how I talk and how Lacey talks, it shows me that you’re interested in getting to know us and not just “fuck n’ go” which has never been our interest. I’m sure there are people here who will be completely put off by our approach, that’s the idea. If that's your intent then that's what works for you, many/most won't want to follow that line as often they look for ease of communication. I do agree that it shouldn't be hard and I never had an issue chatting to couples as a single. However, when many couples are saying much the same thing, perhaps a bit of clarification and demystifying is required. Which one of you has replied? See my point? Couples don’t start the communication properly! I’ve no idea now who wrote your comment? Mr or Mrs? Simple to just sign off who...... Does it matter in this context, though? You're just having a chat on the forum. Not the same thing as receiving a first message saying "nice tits" or similar.
Mrs TMN x
True but when I read the forum posts from couples I always assume it’s the female writing it but it’s still communication! The first message should be addressed to both of you, the sender is lacking in intelligence by writing ‘nice tits’ or similar! I would block such a person...."Why would you assume its the female? | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea" I think the LPP from some couples can put some people off either wanting to mail them at all, or being wary of what drama they might get involved with. Even if that couple hasn't been openly LPP you just never know their dynamic. I address couples as a joint entity. If it's a forum post I'm talking to whoever posted. I mostly have no clue who people are as I can't keep track of profile name changes. (Even when everyone else clearly knows who they are/ were!) If I'm mailing a couple I'd do a generic "hello", meaning to both of them. If they are offended I'm not being specific I can't help that, I'm just me. Similar to what Lacey's post said earlier. | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male" Some do... | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea I think the LPP from some couples can put some people off either wanting to mail them at all, or being wary of what drama they might get involved with. Even if that couple hasn't been openly LPP you just never know their dynamic. I address couples as a joint entity. If it's a forum post I'm talking to whoever posted. I mostly have no clue who people are as I can't keep track of profile name changes. (Even when everyone else clearly knows who they are/ were!) If I'm mailing a couple I'd do a generic "hello", meaning to both of them. If they are offended I'm not being specific I can't help that, I'm just me. Similar to what Lacey's post said earlier. " Sorry, what do you mean by LPP and the dynamic? Mrs TMN x | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male Some do..." Itd be nice to find one, i think itd be a fun experience | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male" I think you’ll find there a plenty of couples looking for a straight single male, in fact I would hazard it probably one of the most popular combinations | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male" We are not adverse to the idea of a single male even though our profile says not looking for them, otherwise we get inundated by dick pics and single word/line messages. | |||
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"An obvious one, but one a lot of men forget - always address a couple as a couple! " | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male" That's a slightly different issue! | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea I think the LPP from some couples can put some people off either wanting to mail them at all, or being wary of what drama they might get involved with. Even if that couple hasn't been openly LPP you just never know their dynamic. I address couples as a joint entity. If it's a forum post I'm talking to whoever posted. I mostly have no clue who people are as I can't keep track of profile name changes. (Even when everyone else clearly knows who they are/ were!) If I'm mailing a couple I'd do a generic "hello", meaning to both of them. If they are offended I'm not being specific I can't help that, I'm just me. Similar to what Lacey's post said earlier. Sorry, what do you mean by LPP and the dynamic? Mrs TMN x" LPP is lamp post pissing. Where one or both people go over the top posting about how in love/ lust they are, to 'mark their territory'. The dynamic- in some couples one person is more into swinging than the other. One may only be going along with it for fear of losing their partner. Or they're just not ready to meet other people yet and one might get jealous. | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way." A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot 
Mrs TMN x | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea I think the LPP from some couples can put some people off either wanting to mail them at all, or being wary of what drama they might get involved with. Even if that couple hasn't been openly LPP you just never know their dynamic. I address couples as a joint entity. If it's a forum post I'm talking to whoever posted. I mostly have no clue who people are as I can't keep track of profile name changes. (Even when everyone else clearly knows who they are/ were!) If I'm mailing a couple I'd do a generic "hello", meaning to both of them. If they are offended I'm not being specific I can't help that, I'm just me. Similar to what Lacey's post said earlier. Sorry, what do you mean by LPP and the dynamic? Mrs TMN x LPP is lamp post pissing. Where one or both people go over the top posting about how in love/ lust they are, to 'mark their territory'. The dynamic- in some couples one person is more into swinging than the other. One may only be going along with it for fear of losing their partner. Or they're just not ready to meet other people yet and one might get jealous. " Ah ok, thanks! Mrs TMN x | |||
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"Always remember there’s two people, problem we seem to have is single guys completely ignore the male of the couple and only want to chase to the female, which i’m sure is pretty common with other couples too." I like those kinds. Means I know straight away that we're not compatible so no need to chat to them. | |||
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"So in summary: Some people like to sign off their messages. Some don't. Some people like an equal split of male/female pics. Some don't. Some people find it difficult to approach couples for fear of offending somehow. Some don't. Anything I've missed? Mrs TMN "Basically yes! There are no hard and fast rules really, just treat couples as people. Don't assume anything and if you have questions; ask! I always found that if you just chat as you would do to anyone else, you won't go far wrong. | |||
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"I've never experienced being with a couple, it was something I wanted to explore but the dynamics make me very wary. On the odd occasion I have chatted, I have tried to be very respectful to both people and include everyone and be mindful of how comfortable everyone is. Sadly on the two occasions I have chatted it didn't work out.. Could just be me.. Haha maybe need to take the hint hehe but being open and upfront about exactly what the boundaries are would be good.. And if you actually fancy me too.. But at this moment I'm not sure if I would go down the path of meeting a couple again? Even though I find the thought very erotic "Like with anything I guess - open communication v important - sometimes it will work out, sometimes not
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"So in summary: Some people like to sign off their messages. Some don't. Some people like an equal split of male/female pics. Some don't. Some people find it difficult to approach couples for fear of offending somehow. Some don't. Anything I've missed? Mrs TMN
Basically yes!
There are no hard and fast rules really, just treat couples as people. Don't assume anything and if you have questions; ask!
I always found that if you just chat as you would do to anyone else, you won't go far wrong. "Excellent rules for life in general
Mrs TMN x | |||
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the worst that can happen is we just don't click, and thats not always down to the single person, we won't be everyone cup of tea although we're awesome
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x"We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash. | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash."Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work. | |||
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"Mainly find them arses. my wife does this..., my wife has had this many...., I don't care!" Doesn't that count for any post on here? The only difference is the syntax... | |||
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"The issue isn't talking to a couple, its finding a couple who are looking for what you offer." | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash.
Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work. "I am willing to keep the blindfold on and not even look who the chosen 3rd party is and it is still pretty hard to organise | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash.
Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work.
I am willing to keep the blindfold on and not even look who the chosen 3rd party is and it is still pretty hard to organise "I did a meet like that. It only took a couple of weeks to find someone. My partner was the one blindfolded though, not me. | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash.
Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work.
I am willing to keep the blindfold on and not even look who the chosen 3rd party is and it is still pretty hard to organise
I did a meet like that. It only took a couple of weeks to find someone. My partner was the one blindfolded though, not me. "Was it one of the car crash meets or one of the good ones. I am the sacrificial lamb in this scenario | |||
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"If all couples sign off who is actually posting/replying and be very conscious themselves about the potential confusion they could cause, that would be very beneficial for all involved
D." | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash.
Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work.
I am willing to keep the blindfold on and not even look who the chosen 3rd party is and it is still pretty hard to organise
I did a meet like that. It only took a couple of weeks to find someone. My partner was the one blindfolded though, not me.
Was it one of the car crash meets or one of the good ones. I am the sacrificial lamb in this scenario "
It was good. Just make sure you have a trusted friend and it will be fine. | |||
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"I’m open to talk to both persons, but I typically engage more with the ladies in the couple. I guess it’s a natural thing as I’m straight so the ladies have to choose if I’m right for them. It probably also depends on the couple’s dynamic. I like the idea of organising something with the man and surprise the lady with a scenario or role play she has no input in. Obviously she would have to be attracted to me and I’d need to trust the man knows what she likes and will suggest a scenario which wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in any way. A little off topic - but something we have talked about, sounds incredibly hot
Mrs TMN x
We've talked about this scenario too, we've found it pretty much impossible to meet anyone as a couple including single guys. The concern is that is it one of those things that's a great fantasy but in reality could be a complete car crash.
Even car crash meets are good to look back on. Our best meets are ones we thought would never work.
I am willing to keep the blindfold on and not even look who the chosen 3rd party is and it is still pretty hard to organise
I did a meet like that. It only took a couple of weeks to find someone. My partner was the one blindfolded though, not me.
Was it one of the car crash meets or one of the good ones. I am the sacrificial lamb in this scenario
It was good. Just make sure you have a trusted friend and it will be fine. "We are probably too particular or something as it shouldn't really be so hard but everything has to be spot on for us to want to play. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea" Make it known as to who is messaging the male or the female. A lot of the time I'd have to ask. | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Make it known as to who is messaging the male or the female. A lot of the time I'd have to ask." It's me, cracking boobs btw | |||
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"Always remember there’s two people, problem we seem to have is single guys completely ignore the male of the couple and only want to chase to the female, which i’m sure is pretty common with other couples too." This is the thing we encounter the most, It is hard as it’s more me that they’d have to engage with and G isn’t as chatty as I am, but they have to remember he exists and he’s who I want or it is just weird. -Mrs | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male" Some couples and I know from personal experience mainly want another woman and it’s usually for the female part of the duos pleasure, so they meet other couples to fulfil the fantasy....... | |||
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"Couples dont seem that unapproachable in my opinion but most are looking for a third woman or a bi-guy I think ive only seen one where they want a straight third male Some do... Itd be nice to find one, i think itd be a fun experience" Oh we do exist!!!! My main issue with the single guys is that they direct messages to my other half saying things like " your wife has nice tits mate" - the tits are mine - if you like them tell me not him!!! Not saying that kind of message gets a response though . . . .I do like the more articulate man! I more or less talk to the singles and if I think it might go somewhere my husband will then join in. He tends to engage with the couples first then I'll jump in All we ask for is for people to talk to us both, share their personality through their chat, be upfront about what they're looking for (and pure social meets is ok!) and be able to string a sentence together! And laugh at life!!! | |||
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"Hahahahaha so basically this is a thread where the female halves of the couple encourage the male halves to vent out their frustrations at being constantly overlooked during conversations with singles ?? I’m a single guy and I don’t find it scary chatting to couples. I do however find it tedious when you are not all on the same wavelength. Makes flirting and naughty chats very tricky to manoeuvre. " Actually, no. This thread is to try and bridge the gap and (for some) to give a little helping hand to ease communication both ways. No one has all the answers and most of us could learn to communicate a little better so everyone gets what they want. It's not intended as a back biting thread or to point fingers. | |||
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"Oy you 2 wait till u see the state il leave your misses in sorry in advance" Nailed it. | |||
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"Oy you 2 wait till u see the state il leave your misses in sorry in advance" If she can still stand, then we ain’t done | |||
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"Oy you 2 wait till u see the state il leave your misses in sorry in advance If she can still stand, then we ain’t done " Oh stop, you smooth talker. | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun "This is only what the forum think. Others have no problems communicating with couples. | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun "Not everyone has the same “rules” We don’t have any, real people being real and nice are always welcome in our inbox whether that amounts to friendship, or a meet or whatever. Most of the rules I think come from when single men are really pushy and rude in messages. We personally try to answer nicely as long as people are nice to us. | |||
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"Oy you 2 wait till u see the state il leave your misses in sorry in advance Nailed it."  i know | |||
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Morning sexy singles.
So much and support for each other.
Keep it up.
Jo.Xx | |||
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"Following on from my thread last night, it seems that many singles find couples intimidating or difficult to talk to. In the interests of bringing folks together, here's a thread for singles and couples to discuss how to approach each other. If there's a question that you want to ask or ways to make things easier, pop it here and folks can reply or help. Over to you... Tea Make it known as to who is messaging the male or the female. A lot of the time I'd have to ask." We sign off our messages M or E, depending on who's writing. Had a guy moaning the other day because I wouldn't tell him why M meant. Methinks he hasn't spent half a second reading a single word of our profile. It's called M plus E for fucks sake.
M | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun "We don't have any rules but we see a lot of red flags. We're having a ball. Lots of balls on a good day.
M | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun "Everyone plays it their own way. Some couples have loads of rules; some don't. Some singles have loads of rules; some don't.
Mrs TMN x | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun
Everyone plays it their own way. Some couples have loads of rules; some don't. Some singles have loads of rules; some don't.
Mrs TMN x" I like reading about different people's rules. It makes me more aware of what they might be so I can make sure we are all comfortable. Respect works both ways. | |||
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"I don't talk to couples as I'm not interested in women but having read the "rules" on this thread, I'm really pleased that I don't. I thought swinging was meant to be fun
Everyone plays it their own way. Some couples have loads of rules; some don't. Some singles have loads of rules; some don't.
Mrs TMN x
I like reading about different people's rules. It makes me more aware of what they might be so I can make sure we are all comfortable. Respect works both ways. "Us too. We like profiles with loads of upper case ranty rules. Helps us be aware of who to avoid.
Same for singles in fairness, not just couples.
I know our profile goes on a bit, but if we view a profile and our first thought is "blimey this is hard work" we don't look much further.
Although ours blathers on we hope it's an easy enough read. 
M | |||
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"I don’t often contact couples as many don’t want to meet guys like me " YOU are just what we are after but as with most that suit too far away ,our most annoying issue being so remote  | |||
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"I don’t often contact couples as many don’t want to meet guys like me YOU are just what we are after but as with most that suit too far away ,our most annoying issue being so remote "bloody typical | |||
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"Oy you 2 wait till u see the state il leave your misses in sorry in advance If she can still stand, then we ain’t done Oh stop, you smooth talker." Just an honest truth. Every meet has to count deeply | |||
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