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"I think more than anything it comes down to managing expectations. It's a sad state that in reality it simply is a fact that people can be shitty humans. The level of that shittiness varies of course, some are in prison for their behaviours, others on the run, in hiding etc. Some get away with it. Not all bad behaviour is prison worthy of course. I think there can come a point where you WANT to believe in people, that people are good on the inside as a whole, and I do believe that many many are, but over time people have seen and been stung by so much badness that they shut down to a degree. Also our expectations may be slightly off kilter. Someone can be a good person, but they've also learned the hard way about others and bare scars, they could be the most generous, caring, loving person you could wish to meet but- they have barriers up which can make them appear cold. They manage their shit in their own way. Whereas I may not know their battles, yet I see the outer them and think they're a bit of a cunt. Our wants and needs from each other may be completely different as far as friendship/emotional support etc making one seem needy and the other nasty. There are just so many variables. Christ I feel like I'm rambling. Basically, life experience takes its toll for some. Many don't have much of a moral code of conduct, and that takes you by surprise at first, but then you realise it's more prevalent than you thought and that in turn puts you on the defensive. My expectation in humanity has lowered significantly, which may be part of the reason I hold those I care about so dearly, because they ARE gems. Doesn't stop me hoping more people could "fit my page" so to speak and I can be disappointed when they don't, but truth is.... most of us are on different pages. P" All of this intelligent and coherent ramble. | |||
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"I constantly question myself and wonder where I went wrong when things go tits up. I'm lucky in that I've only had a couple of really bad experiences with Fab meets, but even then I wonder what I did to attract that kind of mentality. " Some people say the nasty people are attracted to nice people. Because nasty people can recognise it and see through to their nasty core and won't meet them. Take it as a (weird) compliment. X | |||
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"I think more than anything it comes down to managing expectations. It's a sad state that in reality it simply is a fact that people can be shitty humans. The level of that shittiness varies of course, some are in prison for their behaviours, others on the run, in hiding etc. Some get away with it. Not all bad behaviour is prison worthy of course. I think there can come a point where you WANT to believe in people, that people are good on the inside as a whole, and I do believe that many many are, but over time people have seen and been stung by so much badness that they shut down to a degree. Also our expectations may be slightly off kilter. Someone can be a good person, but they've also learned the hard way about others and bare scars, they could be the most generous, caring, loving person you could wish to meet but- they have barriers up which can make them appear cold. They manage their shit in their own way. Whereas I may not know their battles, yet I see the outer them and think they're a bit of a cunt. Our wants and needs from each other may be completely different as far as friendship/emotional support etc making one seem needy and the other nasty. There are just so many variables. Christ I feel like I'm rambling. Basically, life experience takes its toll for some. Many don't have much of a moral code of conduct, and that takes you by surprise at first, but then you realise it's more prevalent than you thought and that in turn puts you on the defensive. My expectation in humanity has lowered significantly, which may be part of the reason I hold those I care about so dearly, because they ARE gems. Doesn't stop me hoping more people could "fit my page" so to speak and I can be disappointed when they don't, but truth is.... most of us are on different pages. P" These are very wise words and clearly born from a lot of hard lessons and a good deal of understanding and introspection. It is a balance I think and requires a degree of empathy on both sides that often may be lacking. | |||
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"Some people are horrible some people allow them to be." How do you mean 'allow them to be'? | |||
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"I do and say as i wish if people wanna moan on il happily take piss if people genuinely upset il try cheer em up tho if im upset i hulk smash but i choose to do that as it helps me vent not out of a need for pitty tho" That's not really what I'm asking but with yourself you generally do what you want on the forums, when you want. You're virtually the embodiment of 'ego', theres something reliable and predictable about yourself | |||
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"I constantly question myself and wonder where I went wrong when things go tits up. I'm lucky in that I've only had a couple of really bad experiences with Fab meets, but even then I wonder what I did to attract that kind of mentality. " That's an interesting point about self blame. I'm not trying to victim blame you but what do you think you did wrong? | |||
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"The not reading of profiles thing on here, I can tell you why I think it can be frustrating and why people end up upset about it. How many times to we feel voiceless? Unheard? Like nobody is listening? It can happen at work, you could have grown up in an environment where you weren't even allowed an opinion let alone have it matter. Our profile is not only our "shop window" it's our voice. See, so when people chose not read it but message frantically anyway they're doing so without listening, which almost invalidates what we're saying P" That's very very true. It's also why people get frustrated with a lack of response or inclusion from the forums and claims of 'cliques' abound, they fell that their voice is being ignored and that they're being invalidated or that they're being judged as not worthy, that anger then turns outwards. | |||
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"The not reading of profiles thing on here, I can tell you why I think it can be frustrating and why people end up upset about it. How many times to we feel voiceless? Unheard? Like nobody is listening? It can happen at work, you could have grown up in an environment where you weren't even allowed an opinion let alone have it matter. Our profile is not only our "shop window" it's our voice. See, so when people chose not read it but message frantically anyway they're doing so without listening, which almost invalidates what we're saying P" Yes! It’s frustratingly dismissive. People message assuming I’m a single woman, dismissing G and doing everything our profile says not to do. Then coming here and whinging that people delete and they don’t understand why. | |||
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"Another thing, half the time on here you have no idea if you're mixing with the real person or their "online persona" Would be so much easier if people could just keep shit real so you know what/who you're dealing with but truth is, for some this is their escape, to be who they want to be/wish they were which is far removed from their every day version and thoughts. For others they won't reveal much about themselves because as shit as it is there are people who'll use vulnerability or knowledge about a person against them. You can't excuse that, that's shitty humaning, but now we're back at the start where some are afraid to be the real them. P"  | |||
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"Also our expectations may be slightly off kilter. Someone can be a good person, but they've also learned the hard way about others and bare scars, they could be the most generous, caring, loving person you could wish to meet but- they have barriers up which can make them appear cold. They manage their shit in their own way. Whereas I may not know their battles, yet I see the outer them and think they're a bit of a cunt." Have we met? | |||
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"Some people are horrible some people allow them to be. How do you mean 'allow them to be'? " Some people don't challenge poor behaviour, some make excuses for it, some think they're not worth being treated any better. People only treat you how you allow them to. Of course I know that's a very simple way of looking at things but how many people on fab don't filter single men out but moan about being contacted by them, don't block and report abuse immediately? Off fab how many women complain that men only want them for one thing then give that one thing freely, how many guys claim they're too nice and keep acting like doormats? How many men and women repeat the actions that lead them into abusive relationships over and over? | |||
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"I think more than anything it comes down to managing expectations. It's a sad state that in reality it simply is a fact that people can be shitty humans. The level of that shittiness varies of course, some are in prison for their behaviours, others on the run, in hiding etc. Some get away with it. Not all bad behaviour is prison worthy of course. I think there can come a point where you WANT to believe in people, that people are good on the inside as a whole, and I do believe that many many are, but over time people have seen and been stung by so much badness that they shut down to a degree. Also our expectations may be slightly off kilter. Someone can be a good person, but they've also learned the hard way about others and bare scars, they could be the most generous, caring, loving person you could wish to meet but- they have barriers up which can make them appear cold. They manage their shit in their own way. Whereas I may not know their battles, yet I see the outer them and think they're a bit of a cunt. Our wants and needs from each other may be completely different as far as friendship/emotional support etc making one seem needy and the other nasty. There are just so many variables. Christ I feel like I'm rambling. Basically, life experience takes its toll for some. Many don't have much of a moral code of conduct, and that takes you by surprise at first, but then you realise it's more prevalent than you thought and that in turn puts you on the defensive. My expectation in humanity has lowered significantly, which may be part of the reason I hold those I care about so dearly, because they ARE gems. Doesn't stop me hoping more people could "fit my page" so to speak and I can be disappointed when they don't, but truth is.... most of us are on different pages. P These are very wise words and clearly born from a lot of hard lessons and a good deal of understanding and introspection. It is a balance I think and requires a degree of empathy on both sides that often may be lacking. " Yep, and I think the lack of empathy comes from people not opening up, see the point I just made about the reasons people may not want to open up. Ultimately, all we have to work with is what people will allow us to see, and unfortunately what we see isn't always what we get, what we see isn't always the truth, what we see may be the bitter side of what once was a lovely person, or what we are could easily be a closed minded fucknugget with zero respect or moral standard. I longed for a perfect world, but there comes a point where you have to admit defeat and accept it never will be P | |||
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"The not reading of profiles thing on here, I can tell you why I think it can be frustrating and why people end up upset about it. How many times to we feel voiceless? Unheard? Like nobody is listening? It can happen at work, you could have grown up in an environment where you weren't even allowed an opinion let alone have it matter. Our profile is not only our "shop window" it's our voice. See, so when people chose not read it but message frantically anyway they're doing so without listening, which almost invalidates what we're saying P Yes! It’s frustratingly dismissive. People message assuming I’m a single woman, dismissing G and doing everything our profile says not to do. Then coming here and whinging that people delete and they don’t understand why. " Exactly! All we have to do is open our ears by using our eyes. P | |||
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"Another thing, half the time on here you have no idea if you're mixing with the real person or their "online persona" Would be so much easier if people could just keep shit real so you know what/who you're dealing with but truth is, for some this is their escape, to be who they want to be/wish they were which is far removed from their every day version and thoughts. For others they won't reveal much about themselves because as shit as it is there are people who'll use vulnerability or knowledge about a person against them. You can't excuse that, that's shitty humaning, but now we're back at the start where some are afraid to be the real them. P" I agree, that's a very valid point and it's often a learned response from being on here and receiving abuse. Many popular forum users are caricatures and 'fake' as a result of bad experiences. Is it a bad thing? I think it's a question (in the relevance of my OP) of what we 'blame' as being the reason. It would be easy to let experience make you hard, cold and build a fiction as that's easier and safer. Is there a degree of "they made me do it, it's their fault" in those actions? The question then is maybe; how much do we allow others to shape our motives and should they? | |||
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"Some people are horrible some people allow them to be. How do you mean 'allow them to be'? Some people don't challenge poor behaviour, some make excuses for it, some think they're not worth being treated any better. People only treat you how you allow them to. Of course I know that's a very simple way of looking at things but how many people on fab don't filter single men out but moan about being contacted by them, don't block and report abuse immediately? Off fab how many women complain that men only want them for one thing then give that one thing freely, how many guys claim they're too nice and keep acting like doormats? How many men and women repeat the actions that lead them into abusive relationships over and over?" That's very true and what I was trying to ask. The question of control over our own actions and autonomy is often hand in hand with the blame we hand out to others for their failings. If we truly manage ourselves wholy and fully, would there be as much blame pointed out? | |||
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"Another thing, half the time on here you have no idea if you're mixing with the real person or their "online persona" Would be so much easier if people could just keep shit real so you know what/who you're dealing with but truth is, for some this is their escape, to be who they want to be/wish they were which is far removed from their every day version and thoughts. For others they won't reveal much about themselves because as shit as it is there are people who'll use vulnerability or knowledge about a person against them. You can't excuse that, that's shitty humaning, but now we're back at the start where some are afraid to be the real them. P I agree, that's a very valid point and it's often a learned response from being on here and receiving abuse. Many popular forum users are caricatures and 'fake' as a result of bad experiences. Is it a bad thing? I think it's a question (in the relevance of my OP) of what we 'blame' as being the reason. It would be easy to let experience make you hard, cold and build a fiction as that's easier and safer. Is there a degree of "they made me do it, it's their fault" in those actions? The question then is maybe; how much do we allow others to shape our motives and should they? " I think there is a degree of "they made me do it" and although I may understand it I don't particularly like it. Like, I know I have issues with trust, I wouldn't have had those issues if people hadn't been shitty. However I openly admit to having these issues. They are MINE and I own them and they're something I'm working on. I'm not hiding anything. I don't expect people to give us their life story, however we aren't mind readers. Another "they made me do it".. Applying filters, that's a response to a problem with unsolicited messages. So the solution to the problem is actually a problem, because if people listened to start with and only messaged those whose "requirements" they met rather than going all gung-ho and messaging all and sundry, filters needn't be applied. I've gone to message people offering a listening ear before now and filters have prevented it, so filters can get in the way of good things as well as blocking the bad. P | |||
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"Another thing, half the time on here you have no idea if you're mixing with the real person or their "online persona" Would be so much easier if people could just keep shit real so you know what/who you're dealing with but truth is, for some this is their escape, to be who they want to be/wish they were which is far removed from their every day version and thoughts. For others they won't reveal much about themselves because as shit as it is there are people who'll use vulnerability or knowledge about a person against them. You can't excuse that, that's shitty humaning, but now we're back at the start where some are afraid to be the real them. P I agree, that's a very valid point and it's often a learned response from being on here and receiving abuse. Many popular forum users are caricatures and 'fake' as a result of bad experiences. Is it a bad thing? I think it's a question (in the relevance of my OP) of what we 'blame' as being the reason. It would be easy to let experience make you hard, cold and build a fiction as that's easier and safer. Is there a degree of "they made me do it, it's their fault" in those actions? The question then is maybe; how much do we allow others to shape our motives and should they? I think there is a degree of "they made me do it" and although I may understand it I don't particularly like it. Like, I know I have issues with trust, I wouldn't have had those issues if people hadn't been shitty. However I openly admit to having these issues. They are MINE and I own them and they're something I'm working on. I'm not hiding anything. I don't expect people to give us their life story, however we aren't mind readers. Another "they made me do it".. Applying filters, that's a response to a problem with unsolicited messages. So the solution to the problem is actually a problem, because if people listened to start with and only messaged those whose "requirements" they met rather than going all gung-ho and messaging all and sundry, filters needn't be applied. I've gone to message people offering a listening ear before now and filters have prevented it, so filters can get in the way of good things as well as blocking the bad. P" I agree with you absolutely about filters, they shouldn't need to be a thing, if everyone behaved as decent humans. Playing devil's advocate here; I do also wonder if that became the situation because people are reticent about messaging first because they're afraid of rejection. If people owned their own fears and worries then maybe the situation wouldn't be as it is now. Again, is it a case of blaming others for our own faults? I'm not saying that's the case but possibly...? | |||
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"I do and say as i wish if people wanna moan on il happily take piss if people genuinely upset il try cheer em up tho if im upset i hulk smash but i choose to do that as it helps me vent not out of a need for pitty tho That's not really what I'm asking but with yourself you generally do what you want on the forums, when you want. You're virtually the embodiment of 'ego', theres something reliable and predictable about yourself" you know me i never understand your questions  | |||
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"I do and say as i wish if people wanna moan on il happily take piss if people genuinely upset il try cheer em up tho if im upset i hulk smash but i choose to do that as it helps me vent not out of a need for pitty tho That's not really what I'm asking but with yourself you generally do what you want on the forums, when you want. You're virtually the embodiment of 'ego', theres something reliable and predictable about yourselfyou know me i never understand your questions "That's because you're a duck...  | |||
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"Another thing, half the time on here you have no idea if you're mixing with the real person or their "online persona" Would be so much easier if people could just keep shit real so you know what/who you're dealing with but truth is, for some this is their escape, to be who they want to be/wish they were which is far removed from their every day version and thoughts. For others they won't reveal much about themselves because as shit as it is there are people who'll use vulnerability or knowledge about a person against them. You can't excuse that, that's shitty humaning, but now we're back at the start where some are afraid to be the real them. P I agree, that's a very valid point and it's often a learned response from being on here and receiving abuse. Many popular forum users are caricatures and 'fake' as a result of bad experiences. Is it a bad thing? I think it's a question (in the relevance of my OP) of what we 'blame' as being the reason. It would be easy to let experience make you hard, cold and build a fiction as that's easier and safer. Is there a degree of "they made me do it, it's their fault" in those actions? The question then is maybe; how much do we allow others to shape our motives and should they? I think there is a degree of "they made me do it" and although I may understand it I don't particularly like it. Like, I know I have issues with trust, I wouldn't have had those issues if people hadn't been shitty. However I openly admit to having these issues. They are MINE and I own them and they're something I'm working on. I'm not hiding anything. I don't expect people to give us their life story, however we aren't mind readers. Another "they made me do it".. Applying filters, that's a response to a problem with unsolicited messages. So the solution to the problem is actually a problem, because if people listened to start with and only messaged those whose "requirements" they met rather than going all gung-ho and messaging all and sundry, filters needn't be applied. I've gone to message people offering a listening ear before now and filters have prevented it, so filters can get in the way of good things as well as blocking the bad. P I agree with you absolutely about filters, they shouldn't need to be a thing, if everyone behaved as decent humans. Playing devil's advocate here; I do also wonder if that became the situation because people are reticent about messaging first because they're afraid of rejection. If people owned their own fears and worries then maybe the situation wouldn't be as it is now. Again, is it a case of blaming others for our own faults? I'm not saying that's the case but possibly...? " Hmmm, good question. Now, you didn't fall into my trap on my last addition. I expected my trust issues to be picked up on and questioned, as to why be on a site like this. My response was going to be ..... Ah, and that's where interpretation comes into play. People will naturally assume it's B that I don't trust, whereas that's absolutely not the case, he's one of the few that I trust completely P | |||
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" Hmmm, good question. Now, you didn't fall into my trap on my last addition. I expected my trust issues to be picked up on and questioned, as to why be on a site like this. My response was going to be ..... Ah, and that's where interpretation comes into play. People will naturally assume it's B that I don't trust, whereas that's absolutely not the case, he's one of the few that I trust completely P" Ah but you're forgetting the fact that firstly, I've seen you post and discussed your history with you before so I wouldn't question you on that. Secondly, I wouldn't ask someone about their suitability for being on here, you know your mind well enough to already know the answers. Thirdly, that wasn't even remotely on topic. I'm not falling for that shizzle | |||
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" Hmmm, good question. Now, you didn't fall into my trap on my last addition. I expected my trust issues to be picked up on and questioned, as to why be on a site like this. My response was going to be ..... Ah, and that's where interpretation comes into play. People will naturally assume it's B that I don't trust, whereas that's absolutely not the case, he's one of the few that I trust completely P Ah but you're forgetting the fact that firstly, I've seen you post and discussed your history with you before so I wouldn't question you on that. Secondly, I wouldn't ask someone about their suitability for being on here, you know your mind well enough to already know the answers. Thirdly, that wasn't even remotely on topic. I'm not falling for that shizzle "Dagnammit
But for the sake of the discussion, interpretation can and does come into play. We interpret things based in our own experiences/responses etc rather than remembering the other person has their own reasons and experiences creating their individual responses. I'm very guilty of this and often base my judgments on how I would respond having lived my life not theirs, as I'm not privy to their "inside knowledge of their life so far"
I do have to start work very soon and I'm gutted as I'm enjoying this.
P | |||
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" Hmmm, good question. Now, you didn't fall into my trap on my last addition. I expected my trust issues to be picked up on and questioned, as to why be on a site like this. My response was going to be ..... Ah, and that's where interpretation comes into play. People will naturally assume it's B that I don't trust, whereas that's absolutely not the case, he's one of the few that I trust completely P Ah but you're forgetting the fact that firstly, I've seen you post and discussed your history with you before so I wouldn't question you on that. Secondly, I wouldn't ask someone about their suitability for being on here, you know your mind well enough to already know the answers. Thirdly, that wasn't even remotely on topic. I'm not falling for that shizzle
Dagnammit
But for the sake of the discussion, interpretation can and does come into play. We interpret things based in our own experiences/responses etc rather than remembering the other person has their own reasons and experiences creating their individual responses. I'm very guilty of this and often base my judgments on how I would respond having lived my life not theirs, as I'm not privy to their "inside knowledge of their life so far"
I do have to start work very soon and I'm gutted as I'm enjoying this.
P"Absolutely, personal and internal bias is a huge factor in everything and empathy is often lacking in any aspect of blame. As you say; basing your judgement on how you have lived your life, not theirs. I guess we can all stand to do that a little less. "before you judge a person, first walk a mile in their shoes. Because then you'll be a mile away and you'll have their shoes." | |||
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"Some people are horrible some people allow them to be. How do you mean 'allow them to be'? Some people don't challenge poor behaviour, some make excuses for it, some think they're not worth being treated any better. People only treat you how you allow them to. Of course I know that's a very simple way of looking at things but how many people on fab don't filter single men out but moan about being contacted by them, don't block and report abuse immediately? Off fab how many women complain that men only want them for one thing then give that one thing freely, how many guys claim they're too nice and keep acting like doormats? How many men and women repeat the actions that lead them into abusive relationships over and over? That's very true and what I was trying to ask. The question of control over our own actions and autonomy is often hand in hand with the blame we hand out to others for their failings. If we truly manage ourselves wholy and fully, would there be as much blame pointed out? " Responsibility for poor behaviour lies solely with the person exhibiting that behaviour. Responsibility for putting yourself continuously in a position where they're able to behave poorly towards you lies with you. What contributes to this behaviour of course is a different matter. | |||
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"The responsibility lies with self ,not just on this site but life in general .we make our own choices list our preferences ,choose to be a dick or not . Nobody else is to blame" That's a bold statement. Not even a little bit? I can see your point but as discussed above, I think it's rarely as black and white as that. Yes, we have control over ourselves and if all our motives and directions are clear and honest then there is little to blame for, but we rarely get it right all the time and sometimes faults are others not our own. | |||
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"The responsibility lies with self ,not just on this site but life in general .we make our own choices list our preferences ,choose to be a dick or not . Nobody else is to blame That's a bold statement. Not even a little bit? I can see your point but as discussed above, I think it's rarely as black and white as that. Yes, we have control over ourselves and if all our motives and directions are clear and honest then there is little to blame for, but we rarely get it right all the time and sometimes faults are others not our own. " I think simply blaming others is the extremely easy way to live your life , no one on fab has ruined my fab experience ,no one in my life has ruined my experiences. I think you can choose to be a victim and blaming others leaves you a victim of other people’s whims | |||
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"I do and say as i wish if people wanna moan on il happily take piss if people genuinely upset il try cheer em up tho if im upset i hulk smash but i choose to do that as it helps me vent not out of a need for pitty tho That's not really what I'm asking but with yourself you generally do what you want on the forums, when you want. You're virtually the embodiment of 'ego', theres something reliable and predictable about yourselfyou know me i never understand your questions
That's because you're a duck... "bullseye  quack | |||
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"Any situation can be blamed on either party. Using the messages as an example. Woman gets shitty messages. Filters or blocking would stop the messages. But it's also the fault of the nasty people sending the messages. Then there's perception. If the woman just sees the messages as words on a screen and not directed at her personally- because of course the sender doesn't actually know her- then the intent behind the messages is worthless. They don't hurt, they are just words. " The question then is; how much does any of that affect a person's experience? Is anybody actually changing your experience by not interacting in the manner that *you* expect. Is it therefore then down to your own expectations? Ultimately is it because people expect others to behave in a certain way and then blame *them* for not matching that? | |||
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"The responsibility lies with self ,not just on this site but life in general .we make our own choices list our preferences ,choose to be a dick or not . Nobody else is to blame That's a bold statement. Not even a little bit? I can see your point but as discussed above, I think it's rarely as black and white as that. Yes, we have control over ourselves and if all our motives and directions are clear and honest then there is little to blame for, but we rarely get it right all the time and sometimes faults are others not our own. I think simply blaming others is the extremely easy way to live your life , no one on fab has ruined my fab experience ,no one in my life has ruined my experiences. I think you can choose to be a victim and blaming others leaves you a victim of other people’s whims " I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm playing a touch of devil's advocate here. Personally I've not had my experience changed by bad behaviour and I don't blame others for my 'success' or lack thereof. I may get irritated at times but that's different. | |||
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"The responsibility lies with self ,not just on this site but life in general .we make our own choices list our preferences ,choose to be a dick or not . Nobody else is to blame That's a bold statement. Not even a little bit? I can see your point but as discussed above, I think it's rarely as black and white as that. Yes, we have control over ourselves and if all our motives and directions are clear and honest then there is little to blame for, but we rarely get it right all the time and sometimes faults are others not our own. I think simply blaming others is the extremely easy way to live your life , no one on fab has ruined my fab experience ,no one in my life has ruined my experiences. I think you can choose to be a victim and blaming others leaves you a victim of other people’s whims I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm playing a touch of devil's advocate here. Personally I've not had my experience changed by bad behaviour and I don't blame others for my 'success' or lack thereof. I may get irritated at times but that's different. " I know , devils advocate is good I sometimes play it my self lol | |||
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"Any situation can be blamed on either party. Using the messages as an example. Woman gets shitty messages. Filters or blocking would stop the messages. But it's also the fault of the nasty people sending the messages. Then there's perception. If the woman just sees the messages as words on a screen and not directed at her personally- because of course the sender doesn't actually know her- then the intent behind the messages is worthless. They don't hurt, they are just words. The question then is; how much does any of that affect a person's experience? Is anybody actually changing your experience by not interacting in the manner that *you* expect. Is it therefore then down to your own expectations? Ultimately is it because people expect others to behave in a certain way and then blame *them* for not matching that? " Experiences will always shape how we interact. If *every* interaction was the same, we'd surely abandon all hope. But much like gambling machines, Fab pays out now and then. So we carry on. Good point about our expectations. Perhaps some of us expect people to behave badly so we're not as disappointed when they do. So no blame as such, just our low expectations confirmed. | |||
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