FabSwingers.com forum: Birth

By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

Just curious but you people think it’s right for mum to be in for the birth

Isn’t it a personal thing for mum and dad?

I am the fathers mum and think it’s wrong

Did any of you have your mums with you as well as your partners

I am about to be become a first time granny and hate the thought of the other granny being in there

It’s not a jealousy thing as I wouldn’t want to watch ......I just think it’s a beautiful personal moment

Am I so wrong???.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's up to the Mum

I know I go to my Mum when I need support and love, so I can totally understand why a girl giving birth would want her Mum there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didnt have my Mum there but I totally understand why some would. If mine lived nearer I may have asked her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course you aren't wrong, that is your views.

Obviously your Daughter in law feels differently, she is obviously close to her Mum. I think it is lovely tbh, and tbh this is a apecial time for her, giving birth is a scary prospect, of course she wants her Mum. I would of given anything to have my Mum with me

I have a Daughter in law, and she has said when she has a baby she wants me and her Mum there lol

I think the best thing you can do is let her do things her way.

Congratulations btw. I wish it were becoming Grandma! I have furry Grandbabies, just no human ones

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Additional thought occurs that it really should be how the new mum wants things, her birth experience should be exactly as she wants it without reference to anyone else's opinion of what is right or wrong. It will lead to a calmer delivery with less chance of post natal depression and better outcomes all round.

I was often VERY angry with my mother-in-law for trying to enforce her opinions on me and ultimately it meant when the kids came along she wasn't invited as often because she could not respect my choices as a mother and showed it. Think carefully before telling your daughter in law what you think is "wrong"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me and my husband both want my mum there. I didn’t think she’d want to, but when I asked she was over the moon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/07/19 07:04:17]

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

It's up to the person giving birth who they want there.

And it's not about "watching", its about being in the room to give support.

You don't have to be down the "business end".

Hope it all goes well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was there when my grandson was born, at the request of my daughter.

It was a truly amazing, emotional experience, one I will never forget. I cut the cord and was holding him when he first opened his eyes.

I obviously don’t think it’s wrong, but it mustn’t cause any friction between the coupe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It isn't wrong no, I find that statement a bit ridiculous to be honest. Loads of single women have all sorts of different birth partners, why shouldn't girls have their mothers there

What is your reasoning as to why you think it's wrong? The only time the birth partner is likely to look down below is when baby is crowning x

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

Why wrong? What an odd opinion. Surely what she wants is the right thing? I didn’t realise there was a template for how to give birth.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Just curious but you people think it’s right for mum to be in for the birth

Isn’t it a personal thing for mum and dad?

I am the fathers mum and think it’s wrong

Did any of you have your mums with you as well as your partners

I am about to be become a first time granny and hate the thought of the other granny being in there

It’s not a jealousy thing as I wouldn’t want to watch ......I just think it’s a beautiful personal moment

Am I so wrong???."

I was there for the birth of my grandaughter (my sons child) and so was my son and her dad. It was her wishes her own mom is dead. We weren't at the business end for the birth..more like for morale support. it was just amazing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mum and late husband was in with my first

I was in with my daughter when she had my grand child and glad i was as little one was rushed off to special baby care unit and daughter was in a bad way for a while

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

Oh and my daughter I was there for her too. I wouldn't have been anywhere else.

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By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

I don’t think it’s a bad statement as it’s just my opinion that’s all

I haven’t said anything to my daughter in law and wouldn’t drink of it

Both of the parents would rather be alone but don’t have the heart to tell the mother they would rather be alone

I didn’t mean any disrespect to others opinions

It’s just mum and dad with their new baby sounds so lovely and a moment they will never forget

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just curious but you people think it’s right for mum to be in for the birth

Isn’t it a personal thing for mum and dad?

I am the fathers mum and think it’s wrong

Did any of you have your mums with you as well as your partners

I am about to be become a first time granny and hate the thought of the other granny being in there

It’s not a jealousy thing as I wouldn’t want to watch ......I just think it’s a beautiful personal moment

Am I so wrong???."

A mate of mine's father-in-law was at the birth of their child.

They're not married any more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's wrong. I think it's the choice of the woman giving birth and her partner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couldn't have got through it without my mum. Men are pretty useless and can not cope with the practical things. One point in my labour I wanted to smack the babies father because he kept grabbing my hand. My mum diffused all difficult situations. When it got to the point of difficulty the staff asked my mum to be ready to pull the crash buzzer. My mum calmed me in a way my then partner never could have done.

And frankly it doesn't matter what you want. Your not the one pushing out a baby. She is. What you want has no value.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had my mum with me when I gave birth the 1st time and honestly wanted her there for the next 3 but she wasn't it's totally up to the woman giving birth who she has in the room I wouldn't even say it was any choice of the father to be as it isn't about him or the baby it's about the mum to be being happy and comfortable so she can deliver safely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My Mum and my best friend(gay male) were with me in labour, when I got rushed into theatre for emergency c section I requested to be alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's entirely up to the individual mum and yes it's actually natural to want your own mum there! 40 000 years years of having babies and it's only in the last 40 years the dad's have been there!! Personally I preferred not having the dad there ... I have told my daughter and my son that when it comes to babies there are no rights at all except the mother's choice!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think we should allow each mother to do whatever they feel right and comfortable with without judgement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personal choice. My mum was there until I went into labour then just my husband came in for the birth both times. If I had been single I would certainly have wanted my mum there. For me it was a special thing just between us and I wouldn’t have wanted anyone else there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a shame your daughter in law isn't able to be frank with her mother then. I'm glad I have the kind of mum who would wait to be asked for stuff like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just curious but you people think it’s right for mum to be in for the birth

Isn’t it a personal thing for mum and dad?

I am the fathers mum and think it’s wrong

Did any of you have your mums with you as well as your partners

I am about to be become a first time granny and hate the thought of the other granny being in there

It’s not a jealousy thing as I wouldn’t want to watch ......I just think it’s a beautiful personal moment

Am I so wrong???."
you make choices don't you? Sometimes you're right sometimes you're not, they are young and must be close so if they want her and she wants to go why not

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"I don’t think it’s a bad statement as it’s just my opinion that’s all

I haven’t said anything to my daughter in law and wouldn’t drink of it

Both of the parents would rather be alone but don’t have the heart to tell the mother they would rather be alone

I didn’t mean any disrespect to others opinions

It’s just mum and dad with their new baby sounds so lovely and a moment they will never forget

Xxx"

I dont think that there is any right or wrong way...only the parents to be way.

Birth can be a long and arduous process and I was glad to be of support and have support from the others around me. As much as it's beautiful it was mentally draining.

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother...."
Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?"
teeth..... Mouth...... Now

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?teeth..... Mouth...... Now

Errrrrrrrrr.....................no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?teeth..... Mouth...... Now

Errrrrrrrrr.....................no"
oh cmon I beseech you I can't eat porridge anymore

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?teeth..... Mouth...... Now

Errrrrrrrrr.....................nooh cmon I beseech you I can't eat porridge anymore

Add more milk..........

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By *rustratedmissWoman
over a year ago

York

I really wanted my mum on there with me but the (now) ex wouldn't have it. It meant I had very little support when I really could have done with it.

I can understand why you'd be upset but despite the fact I get on really well with the ex mother in law she isn't MY mum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was never any doubt I was going to be there....my child was going through one of the most life changing experiences, it's my job as a mother....Awww you look so cuddly, vroooooom

Sod orv...cuddly wtf?teeth..... Mouth...... Now

Errrrrrrrrr.....................nooh cmon I beseech you I can't eat porridge anymore

Add more milk..........

"
not a fan....... I take skimmed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a beautiful moment but it's up to the woman pushing the baby out at the end of the day.

I had my partner with me and it was perfect with just the two of us. I did want my mum too, but she was unable to come. I look back and I'm glad it was just me and my partner as it was lovely having nobody but the three of us to soak up those first moments with our daughter.

It is nothing against you (in most cases) so try not to think about it. You'll get so many beautiful moments with your grandchild when they are born and this part won't even cross your mind.

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By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

Well we will soon find out what happens tomorrow if the baby comes on time

Xxxxxx

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Well we will soon find out what happens tomorrow if the baby comes on time

Xxxxxx"

Exciting times...bet you cant wait to meet ittle one..all the best xx

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By *unlovers OP Couple
over a year ago

rotherham

Thank you so much

We soooo excited

Xxxxx

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

My mum was at my birth, and my brother's. I think it must be a family thing.

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By *bcums3Couple
over a year ago

lanarkshire

I had my mum there with the hubby with our first he needed the moral support too lol..but his mum was kept up to date nearly min by min and as soon as it’s was over they were there.

Think its def a personal things

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

I went in with my daughter and her partner for the birth of both her sons.

One of my grandsons was born at 24 weeks and I kept my daughter and her partner calm as they were so scared

I wouldn’t have missed their births for anything

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