FabSwingers.com forum: Judging people

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people just get way too insecure and take it as an attack on their sexuality I think!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?"

No idea

I judge and I'm sure people judge me - or maybe they're too busy worrying about themselves.

I can genuinely say that these days I give zero fucks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I judge. Most of it I keep to myself but yeah too right I do! Shoot me

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Every single one of us judges others on here for something, be it the pictures they post, the people they meet, their forum comments. I think the term judgemental is often thrown out unnecessarily when a difference of opinion occurs.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

Because the forums are absolutely full of it and its a little tiresome to read the same old negativity time and time again. You know as Great Aunt Nancy used to say; "If you ain't got anything nice to say, it's probably just best to let it go".

I wonder sometimes if the people that do judge others so harshly or belittle others wonder how much of an impact that has on the people that are the subject of their ire?

I am not expecting a candy-coated world of happiness, and a degree of skin toughness is needed, the forums after all are a reflection of the full spectrum of humanity, but I guess some of us come here to escape the "real world"....

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Everyone judges. It can be good, bad or shades of both.

This idea that because we are on a site to fuck and ergo won't judge is fucking ridiculous. Sex is incredibly intimate for some, it stands to reason they are more likely to judge. How it's handled and shared is the important thing, it can be done with discretion and care.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I judge

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Every single one of us judges others on here for something, be it the pictures they post, the people they meet, their forum comments. I think the term judgemental is often thrown out unnecessarily when a difference of opinion occurs. "

I agree.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spot on!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Everyone judges. It can be good, bad or shades of both.

Good point, I hadn't thought of it that way. Re: intimate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely the ones who are accusing of judging are judging people themselves

How I live and act is my choice

How others do is their choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm like a proper judge Judy but I wouldn't share my judgement, mainly because it works both ways I think. Airing judgements can upset people and I wouldn't want that

Baloney!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Judging is fine, shallowness which can be construed as judging is a fine line

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/07/19 20:06:50]

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I am actually a judge. So yes I judge.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Nail and head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I judge. Most of it I keep to myself but yeah too right I do! Shoot me

yea me too the key is "keep it to myself"

no need to be rude to people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone judges. It can be good, bad or shades of both.

Agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm like a proper judge Judy but I wouldn't share my judgement, mainly because it works both ways I think. Airing judgements can upset people and I wouldn't want that

Baloney!"

I don’t share mine either but when someone asks a question and I answer a yes or no and as usual it’s different to most people’s! I get accused of it. Just coz I don’t follow the crowd. Pisses me off tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Everyone judges. It can be good, bad or shades of both.

This. Maybe treating others as we would like to be treated is a concept sometimes rather sadly misplaced on fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh cause everyone judges whether we admit it or not.

However we don't and shouldn't always voice it. There is a fine line between judging and mocking especially on here as we normally know very little about anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?"

its fine but some folk take it too far and just end up being nasty bout folk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh cause everyone judges whether we admit it or not.

However we don't and shouldn't always voice it. There is a fine line between judging and mocking especially on here as we normally know very little about anyone. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?

its fine but some folk take it too far and just end up being nasty bout folk"

Yeah I don’t like that. I just usually say yes, no or not for me. No need to kink shame.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm like a proper judge Judy but I wouldn't share my judgement, mainly because it works both ways I think. Airing judgements can upset people and I wouldn't want that

Baloney!

For that reason I dont answer to some stuff on here, dont want the drama. Never conform! Be yourself and fuck the rest haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all judge. It is human nature.

We assess every one and every situation we encounter.

People fear judgment but really they fear rejection .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people get pissed off if they feel that judgement could involve them personally. Though doubtless they are judging someone else on a completely different topic. I think some believe, because we are on a swinging site, that we should accept everything. Even if we don't understand it. Just shrug our shoulders and have that 'not for me, but each to their own' attitude. It's not as simple as that sometimes. We are still human. I truly believe everyone judges something.

Holly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm like a proper judge Judy but I wouldn't share my judgement, mainly because it works both ways I think. Airing judgements can upset people and I wouldn't want that

Baloney!

For that reason I dont answer to some stuff on here, dont want the drama. Never conform! Be yourself and fuck the rest haha"

Yeah. My problem is I do answer but I won’t pretend to be something I’m not x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Judging is fine, shallowness which can be construed as judging is a fine line"

Why is judging ok but being shallow isn't?

I judge and I'm shallow too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We all judge. It is human nature.

We assess every one and every situation we encounter.

People fear judgment but really they fear rejection .

Oooh I like that!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?

its fine but some folk take it too far and just end up being nasty bout folk"

But I like that, in that they are making their opinion public. That way if someone doesn't like their opinion they find out before arranging a meet with them.

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I don't think it's that people judge, good judgement I a great skill in everyday life. I think people's problem is more with the nature, rational behind the judgement and the way it is expressed. Although it is fair to understand that people in different shoes will make different judgements. It's just some judgments just show a total ignorance, lack of understanding and vileness. Its these sorts of jugments that I think people find fault with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Judging is fine, shallowness which can be construed as judging is a fine line

Why is judging ok but being shallow isn't?

I judge and I'm shallow too."

To judge someone is usually based on fact, eg you're married, you shouldn't cheat etc..

Being shallow is often based on a minute personal observation that can't really be perceived.

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Everybody judges to some extent, it's how it's handled though. Some get personal and attack, that's when it goes too far I think x

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

I’ve been judged lately.

I’m having the best time and some people like to bad mouth me. I spose this is why my back is up slightly.

But in the grand scheme of things I have my friends and a fantastic social life in and out of fab so I don’t really know why I get bothered.

As a new friend has just said to me “I’ll keep being Lexi”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no control over what people think of me so i just do what i want fuck it for every person with issue theres 10 who think im hot shit either way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?"

I nudged someone and was proved right

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?"

I realised years ago that I’m marmite - most people love me or hate me but few seem indifferent. Years ago I used to lie awake at night worrying why certain people disliked me, judge me and/or spread total bullshit about me - now I sometimes get a bit sad if someone I thought was really nice doesn’t like me - but I accept that I can’t change who I am so I have to live with it!

We are who we are at the end of the day! We can try to be the best ‘us’ that we can be - but we can’t intrinsically change who we are!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing wrong with judging people. Just realise that people aren't interested in what you think. There's no need to voice every judgement. Not everyone realises that.

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

"I’ve been judged lately.

I’m having the best time and some people like to bad mouth me. I spose this is why my back is up slightly.

But in the grand scheme of things I have my friends and a fantastic social life in and out of fab so I don’t really know why I get bothered.

As a new friend has just said to me “I’ll keep being Lexi”

Well I liked you when I met you - and I happen to be an excellent judge of character!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve been judged lately.

I’m having the best time and some people like to bad mouth me. I spose this is why my back is up slightly.

But in the grand scheme of things I have my friends and a fantastic social life in and out of fab so I don’t really know why I get bothered.

As a new friend has just said to me “I’ll keep being Lexi”

Fuck em mate. If it personal then that’s shit and they’re not worth your time. I’ve had grief on here too and it was all made up. At first it got to me and I left then I thought I don’t even know these people, let alone care what they think! Everyone should just do what the hell they want and let everyone else do that too x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think judgement is endemic

Much of it is learned

From an early age, we are often taught what to think as opposed to how to think

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have no control over what people think of me so i just do what i want fuck it for every person with issue theres 10 who think im hot shit either way

I love that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?

We are who we are at the end of the day! We can try to be the best ‘us’ that we can be - but we can’t intrinsically change who we are! "

Yep. She said it better than me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Who cares! Just keep calm and carry on

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why shouldn't people judge? Why do people get pissed off about what other people think about them?

We are who we are at the end of the day! We can try to be the best ‘us’ that we can be - but we can’t intrinsically change who we are! "

I agree x

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I think it's the difference between expressing preference (ie "I like oranges,but apples are not to my taste")

and judgement ("I like oranges, apples are digusting and anyone who likes apples is disgusting too..")

We all have c@nscious and unc@nscious bias, but I try to be open minded and unjudgemental, on here and in real life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's human nature to judge,pass opinion and sadly belittle on occasion. Not letting you phase you, though easier said that done, is the hardest bit but such a relief once achieved

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nothing wrong with judging people. Just realise that people aren't interested in what you think. There's no need to voice every judgement. Not everyone realises that. "

Some people will be interested.

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By *bcums3Couple
over a year ago

lanarkshire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Who cares! Just keep calm and carry on

x "

Good Line

You should think about putting that on mugs and tea towels

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's human nature to judge,pass opinion and sadly belittle on occasion. Not letting you phase you, though easier said that done, is the hardest bit but such a relief once achieved"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nothing wrong with judging people. Just realise that people aren't interested in what you think. There's no need to voice every judgement. Not everyone realises that.

Some people will be interested.

Oh yes. Some need the judgement of others to function it seems.

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By *ristolcouple21Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

Kylie - Can’t get you out of my head... I hate it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Who cares! Just keep calm and carry on

Good Line

You should think about putting that on mugs and tea towels

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"I’ve been judged lately.

I’m having the best time and some people like to bad mouth me. I spose this is why my back is up slightly.

But in the grand scheme of things I have my friends and a fantastic social life in and out of fab so I don’t really know why I get bothered.

As a new friend has just said to me “I’ll keep being Lexi”

Well I liked you when I met you - and I happen to be an excellent judge of character!

I flipping love you!!!

Thank you.

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

I'm sure I don't judge (much) just have an opinion on whoever.....

So as an example mrcrappypants has shagged miss el douche....ergo my opinion is I'd rather not....

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"I’ve been judged lately.

I’m having the best time and some people like to bad mouth me. I spose this is why my back is up slightly.

But in the grand scheme of things I have my friends and a fantastic social life in and out of fab so I don’t really know why I get bothered.

As a new friend has just said to me “I’ll keep being Lexi”

Thank you. That’s really nice of you to say, I really appreciate it. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d be more worried about the people telling you you’re being judged

I’ve been told lots of random crap lately but do I believe that I’m old and jealous ?

Unless I hear it direct from the person that’s supposed to have said it

Some like to make drama - when there’s not an iota of truth in anything

Judge - don’t judge

Live how you all want to

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"I’d be more worried about the people telling you you’re being judged

I’ve been told lots of random crap lately but do I believe that I’m old and jealous ?

Unless I hear it direct from the person that’s supposed to have said it

Some like to make drama - when there’s not an iota of truth in anything

Judge - don’t judge

Live how you all want to

Exactly....

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Nothing wrong with judging people. Just realise that people aren't interested in what you think. There's no need to voice every judgement. Not everyone realises that.

Some people will be interested.

Oh yes. Some need the judgement of others to function it seems. "

Yep

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

A lot of threads on fab actually ask for judgement. People want to hear good stuff about themselves and if you've got the knack of asking in the right way or you're a woman you'll be told it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I,m too old and wise to worry about other people’s views on me or anything as I would expect no one to heed my views on them . Except for my best friends who have impeccable judgement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am all for free speach provided I can reply to it.

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