FabSwingers.com forum: Rejection

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you handle it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like water off a ducks back

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Like water off a ducks back"

That’s the spirit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Deffo

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Sometimes, sometimes not. I deal with my shit privately when it happens though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope, I hurt like hell for a wee bit x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go for a walk and let it go.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Go for a walk and let it go.

Let it go

Let it gooooooo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Off potential shags, yeah

If a family member or a close friend cut me loose, I'd be distraught

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Depends who has rejected me. Someone I like then yeah it's a bit harder but I put my big girl pants on and get over it. Life can be full of rejection x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Off potential shags, yeah

If a family member or a close friend cut me loose, I'd be distraught"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup.

Lost of practice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends how much it matters

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends how much it matters"

Just a shag?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends who it is and why.

On here I have no qualms about telling someone I fancy them.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Depends on who by. I think I might be quite arrogant? Not arrogant. Ermm, I tend to be fairly cautious unless I think it could be reciprocated. So I've only been rejected once and yes, probably because of the newness of that it stung a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a break up is the same as rejection, I've been quite salty or bitter about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends how much it matters

Just a shag?"
god no pleny more lays out there if thats all i wanted

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Depends who has rejected me. Someone I like then yeah it's a bit harder but I put my big girl pants on and get over it. Life can be full of rejection x"

I own those same pants

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I did mean in terms of approaching someone on fab and being turned down, but I do like all the answers and different ways the post could have been taken (all ambiguous and that)

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By *oppet22TV/TS
over a year ago

huddersfield

Never take it personal

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

Part and parcel of fab ,we had more rejection then would like to admit.its not a problem we just move on. On the other hand there is one of two women that we'd like to meet but it looks like they're not interested that's a bit shit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes depending on circumstances I find it more upsetting than other times, but in general I handle it reasonably well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From here it can sting a little. In real life I dont handle it well at all....we are talking crying on the kitchen floor in a mess

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By *aucy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

Back where I belong

Oh yes, it's not nice but then life can be a bitch

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By *heekybarstewardMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Rejection is part of life ...you just pick yourself up and carry on.

No point dwelling on it .

I'm old enough to look forward not behind

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

Yep, just move on...there are plenty of people in the world that you are compatible with, in all walks of life, go and find them

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

On here you reject just as much as those that rejected you I'd say it weighs it's self out so try not to take it personally

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Can you handle it Op?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection doesn't bother me. If you expect everyone you meet will want to fuck you then have to ask yourself some serious questions.

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

No point in taking it personally, you may never even know the reason so daft wasting time pondering over it.

Jo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it's just on fab then it means nothing in the scale of things!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can you handle it Op? "

In terms of fab? Yep, sure can. Would be absurd to think everyone wants me

In real life? It depends. I’m suffering a rejection at the moment (on going for two years now) due to a falling out and it still hurts a lot.

Doesn’t help with all my hormones at the moment; for example, my dad uses his FB purely for his boxing. So he doesn’t have any of us as friends (he has my mum and that’s it). But when I was over the other day, he was chatting to one of my friends on Facebook, as he trains him. So I had a bitch and moan about how he had them as a friend and not me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can you handle it?"
of course you can't avoid it here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course there the losers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends who

If I’m turned down on here for looks etc before I’ve met then so be it - matters not to me as looks are subjective.

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By *estSussexGuy76Man
over a year ago

copthorne

"Can you handle it?"

Of course, not everyone is going to find me attractive or their type.

You just get on with it and see what happens

The world would be pretty boring if we all liked the same people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends, most of the time yes but odd days it stings a bit x

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By *inn_the_humanMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I actually don't mind rejection in any walk of life. Some things/people are for you, some aren't.

Much prefer a quick but polite "no thanks" than things being string out for ages. I do find that harder to deal with, particularly when it gets to the stage where its obvious that the answer was “no" all along.

Ps - I do appreciate that generally the latter situation is caused by folk wanting to be nice and not hurt others feelings, it just bugs me for some reason

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Yes, once I have an answer, it's accepted. I've had second chances and it's still a no from me.

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

Have never given it a second thought

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

If it isn't coupled with a personal insult, yeap. No problem.

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By *rs-Naughty_Mr-CuddlesCouple
over a year ago

Nr coleford

Like job application lots of rejections and get a good reply

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I actually don't mind rejection in any walk of life. Some things/people are for you, some aren't.

Ps - I do appreciate that generally the latter situation is caused by folk wanting to be nice and not hurt others feelings, it just bugs me for some reason

Ah yes I get that! No point in continuing, just rip the plaster off

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Been having to my whole life so handling it is second nature. Rejection from a stranger is nothing. Rejection from people you know is tougher.

Being able to handle it does not make it any less of a letdown though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do handle it, every time I message someone I like on here. I think I would have given up if I let it get to me.

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

"
very much ours lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

very much ours lol "
you two will give me a big head!

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Rejection is part of life, you have to learn to deal with it or else it eats you up.

Of course it hurts, but the depth of that hurt all depends on the circumstances.

Fab life is very different than real life. If I got rejected here, no big deal. If I have a meet, I go in thinking it’s a one off anyway so what is there to be upset about if it doesn’t happen again.

It’s all about how you deal with your emotions

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Been having to my whole life so handling it is second nature. Rejection from a stranger is nothing. Rejection from people you know is tougher.

Being able to handle it does not make it any less of a letdown though. "

I understand disappointment, I think that's only natural.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Yes, totally. Move on to the next lol.

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By *adbury girlWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

I have 3 boys so face rejection every day in favour of their friends, electronics etc although they don’t reject me at dinner time

Fab rejection as long as it’s polite then that’s life

Friends and family - never faced rejection so I’m obviously with a great crowd of people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's part of life surely

You need to have disappointment to learn from

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Depends what the rejection is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It really is about how you're rejected though as to how it feels but you can't appeal to everyone can you

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I tend to assess situations and if there's a high chance of rejection I avoid the situation if I can. I see no virtue in deliberately putting myself in situations that are unlikely to turn out well.

Obviously with things like job interviews that isn't possible. As an adult I am able to understand that rejection is part of life and deal with it.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

on here doesnt bother me but ive not really been rejected. If i meet someone and they dont want to see me again that doesnt bother me as i used to go into new meets thinking it would be a one off so anything other than that is a bonus

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I tend to assess situations and if there's a high chance of rejection I avoid the situation if I can. "

This is what I was poorly trying to say. I think on here you can sort of tell so then I let it fizzle or end the chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let me have a cry on this ..

Ok all done... Next

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As others have said; it entirely depends on the situation. People have their own sets of likes and wants, I know that I'm not going to be attractive to everyone so a 'no thanks' is part of fab life.

The rejection that's harder to swallow is when it becomes clear that someone was stringing you along or when it becomes clear that a friend, family member or loved one doesn't have you as a concern. That's harder to bear.

I trained as an actor, rejection is part of the job so I know how to handle professional rejection or based on looks. Rejection based on me as a person is a different thing and harder to swallow.

Tea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From nobody's? Yes

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By *arcuszMan
over a year ago

Billingshurst

[Removed by poster at 07/07/19 12:08:05]

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

If it's within a fab context? Absolutely. We can't appeal to everyone and rejection is part of being here. I don't have lingering insecurities, so it doesn't bother me. I do, however, believe that it can be crushing for people with low self esteem or who feel insecure about themselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

I want to drink you

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By *tingly ByronMan
over a year ago

In a town Fab forgot

"Can you handle it?"

Depends on what I'm being rejected from.

Here? No fucks given.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I see someone deleted the message then I get it, or if they say no then just say ok, delete it, and move on, there’s a lot of members on this site, and we all have our own likes/dislikes xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m sort of used to it now

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By *ig daddy 1969Man
over a year ago

manchester

"Can you handle it?"

Second Nature Now

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Yeah. But if I add up all the time I’ve messaged and never had a reply then that’s a good 47 minutes I’m never gonna get back.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I tend to assess situations and if there's a high chance of rejection I avoid the situation if I can.

This is what I was poorly trying to say. I think on here you can sort of tell so then I let it fizzle or end the chat."

I'm not particularly concerned by rejection from people I hardly know but of course rejection from a loved one would be very painful and more difficult to deal with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes!

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By *b_LIVI_ousWoman
over a year ago

Wigan

On here I think it stings a bit when you’ve done the groundwork, made a connection, laid all your cards on the table and then they say ‘no ta’ when you do meet.

In real life/relationships I try and examine if or where it went wrong and learn from it however; sometimes it’s the person doing the rejecting that has an issue and then you’ve got to just draw a line under it.

If it’s family, I would be heartbroken.

With work, just look at the bigger picture and take a deep breath.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can you handle it?"

Uh, yeh

...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

I want to drink you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes totally if people would make it clear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hatter has been rejecting my wooing for years now. He will cave in one day and I'll get the chance to feed him kebab. I'll need to find a new chippy tho coz the one round the corner has closed. I take it like the champ I am.

If B had rejected me in person when we first met I'd have probably been floored! We had already built up such a bond by then, video calling for hours a day etc, there was no question in my mind that things would have been any different to how they went, well, apart from the fact we're now in a relationship! We went above and beyond anything I was expecting there.

Those I like, it can be a bit stingy I suppose but it serves you well to remember not everyone fancies everyone and some people have tastes you wouldn't expect them to. I'm well aware my gob can put some people off, or I may not be tall enough etc. I think a fair few see me as someone they want to protect rather than toss around a bedroom.

Someone I'm just starting to get to know, then no, it doesn't phase me in the least

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By *arcuszMan
over a year ago

Billingshurst

Bonetti

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can you handle it?"

Absolutely...one should not be here if they can't handle rejection...ladies rule the jungle here ..if they don't reply...if they don't engage in chat etc etc ..they're doing so for a reason..their reason...their choice...not all shoes fit...it's all part of the " welcome to the jungle " sign you walk under when you step on in....so no point in spitting out the dummy...or throwing the toys outta the pram..it only gives to prove to the ladies that they were right not to engage in conversation with you in the first place... rejection is a huge ingredient thats in the mix here...just handle it with the maturity that ladies look for.

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By *ingle ex cuckMan
over a year ago

chester

Most men can and you move on from the ones that can’t .

From my experience only , I will say though

The women I’ve rejected in a respectful and tactile way have not handled it well.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

Yes I can. On Fab I accept it simply as being part of fab life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely. It's part of life. Chin up, smile, there are more important things to worry about.

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

"Oh, specifically on here?

Yeah, it's never that important to me. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea, that's cool

very much ours lol you two will give me a big head!

Big head and lots of it lol

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By *ussexboxMan
over a year ago

Ferring

Can’t deal with it in real life, avoid asking tbh.

On here, just think I’m approaching it all wrong so not too worried if I don’t hear anything

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

On Fab, no biggie.

In real life it depends what for and by whom.

I'm pretty resilient

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sometimes, sometimes not. I deal with my shit privately when it happens though. "

this OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It wouldn't feel nice, but i know I won't be everyone's type, so would be able to rationalize it pretty quickly and shrug it off

Holly

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

Yes I honestly can say it doesn't bother me. I know I'm not for everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On here it wouldn't bother me.

In the real world I do struggle. I'm currently preparing myself for quite a big rejection at the moment and it's already really upsetting me.

I'm a sensitive soul and wear my heart on my sleeve sadly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, absolutely no problem for us.

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

"Go for a walk and let it go.

Let it go

Let it gooooooo"

Can't hold it back any more.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope so I don't generally put my self in a position that I can be rejected. Although I opened up yesterday about concerns and my own feelings and no rejection happened yay

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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Yep used to it over the Years!! Even half my own family rejected me

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

Initially I'm hurt or disappointed then I move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never look back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back."

Where’s my roses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

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By *ickyRoosterMan
over a year ago

Uppendown

Cuts me to the quick. And I feel worthless. Until the next bacon banjo. Which sometimes can be hours away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

I would never do that to a lady. If you turn out to be a man I'll bury you where you stand though....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

I would never do that to a lady. If you turn out to be a man I'll bury you where you stand though....

In roses

..my real names Dave

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

I would never do that to a lady. If you turn out to be a man I'll bury you where you stand though....

In roses

..my real names Dave

"
Stewart?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

I would never do that to a lady. If you turn out to be a man I'll bury you where you stand though....

In roses

..my real names Dave

"
eurythmics?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never look back.

Where’s my roses

That's not rejection, it's delay.....

Is it delayed rejection...lol...

I would never do that to a lady. If you turn out to be a man I'll bury you where you stand though....

In roses

..my real names Dave

It's turning out to be that kind of day.....

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By *ongueNcheek33Couple
over a year ago

Manchester

Yes, rejection is just a part of life so no point worrying about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens. It a be a bit disappointing at the time but it's no biggie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't known anything but rejection for the past year so yeah I come to terms with it

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By *ir_anthonyMan
over a year ago

kenilworth

I’ve had more rejections then Erections

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah.

It hurts.

Damn you Meli.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope, I hurt like hell for a wee bit x"

Me too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

here's not real life so yes very easy to cope with, but in the real world and different situations who knows ?

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

Umm it takes about 30 minutes and then EastEnders come on and I’m okay again

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

I wouldn't be arsed on here, real life when I've developed real feelings for someone would be and has been different though. But they wouldn't know it, I'm very good at pretending it doesn't sting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can you handle it?"

If I couldn't, I wouldn't still be on here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection is fine all part and parcel of Fab.

What is dispiriting it to watch your carefully crafted message sink unread to the oblivion of auto-delete.

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