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sexxxy rhymes and norty ditties

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Post yours here and hopefully give people a giggle.

As it's my idea I had best start things off...hope you like ...

I woke up this morning,wondering where I was

I knew that I was in my bed,but there were doubts because

The dream I had seemed just too real,

I felt I was still there

The pillow damp my cock was sore there were scratches everywhere...

There were dungeons there were dragons,

porn stars and a Gimp

Blondes brunettes a couple of dwarves and a scary big black pimp

His string of hoes were going round seeing to every wish

With strap ons chains and pin wheels they would meet my every need

A man in drag,a wizened old hag and a fit bird who could squirt

They held me down they lubed me up and told me it wouldn't hurt

The sucking fucking fisting gushing came from everywhere

Who was doing what to whom no one seemed care

I was sweating,I was trembling...my mind brought to its knees

Every filthy thing been done yet all I felt was peace

.... Well now its its time for bed again,I hope I dream like that

But this time I hope I don't wake up shagging the bloody cat!!!

Dan.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

forgerrabout the norty ditties

lift yer top n show yer titties.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sticks ans stones,

May break my bones,

But whips and chains excite me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a plumber from Lee

Who was plumbing his girl by the sea

She said Stop your plumbing,

There's somebody coming!

Said the plumber still plumbing... It's me!

There once was a man from East Kent

Whose tool was so long that it bent

To save her some trouble

He folded it double

And instead of coming...he went

(Shamelessly stolen)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There once was a plumber from Lee

Who was plumbing his girl by the sea

She said Stop your plumbing,

There's somebody coming!

Said the plumber still plumbing... It's me!

There once was a man from East Kent

Whose tool was so long that it bent

To save her some trouble

He folded it double

And instead of coming...he went

(Shamelessly stolen)"

May have been shamelessly stolen..but gave me a good giggle anyway.thanks.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

the man stood on the burning deck eating red hot scallops, one fell down his trouser leg and burnt him on the..... ankle

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

sit on my face and tell me that you love me

sit on my face and tell me that you care

oh i love to ride between your thighs

you blow me away you blow me away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My name is Rabbie Burns

and i work at the ploo

i earn my gelt

fae the sweat o ma brew

But you my dear

are just the reverse

you earn your gelt

fae the sweat o yer erse

might need some translation from the scots into english

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Very good that's is one of his more straightforward translations,but I wonder what babelfish would make of it!

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