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How do you pick your favourite child

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toss a coin put the other one in adoption, problem solving for the future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use one of the coins you got in change to flip for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Use one of the coins you got in change to flip for it."

Jynx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Use one of the coins you got in change to flip for it."

Its 2019. Contact less all the way for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same way i did the one that lets u down most aint getting fed

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By *ust ClareTV/TS
over a year ago

Settlewick!

If you'd have put both ready meals back you could have bought a scratchcard too AND saved bad feeling between the kids

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By *unniebee1970Woman
over a year ago

The Hive

Foodbank?

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

Maybe put the fags back and get more food

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Weak bait

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feed the fed one to the hungry one

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you'd have put both ready meals back you could have bought a scratchcard too AND saved bad feeling between the kids "

Oooh gambling. Not a bad idea

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By *unkym34Man
over a year ago

London

One that brings beer back from the fridge quickest

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Foodbank?"

It's a 5 minute walk in wrong direction.

Not an option

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By *wingfellowMan
over a year ago

my own little sanctuary

Can’t give one without the other so just have double portions for yourself

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By *uckOfTheBayMan
over a year ago

Mold

Has to be the smallest one, they can fit up the chimney so you can send them out to work

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Can’t give one without the other so just have double portions for yourself "

I got a takeaway so I'm stuffed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get them to compete in a triathlon. Winner eats. Loser passes out through lack of energy and you don't need to worry about them complaining of hunger all night.

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

Draw straws

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Being as I've got no kids of my own, I used to go to ma local park and choose the one with the worst pram and buy them some Jelly Tots.

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By *wingfellowMan
over a year ago

my own little sanctuary

If they have bunk beds tell them it’s for Sparta and see who takes the plunge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pop the hungry one on eBay.

Wouldn't be long before a Madonna/Brangelina type came along and relieved you of the choice for a reasonable price.

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

Shouldn't of had 2 kids you wouldn't of had to choose. Give them the fags they be happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

erm have you thought about half each ???

Other than that let them fight to the death will save this issue happening again and save you a fortune

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Which one is likely to be the highest earner and able to afford a decent care home? Pick that one

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire


"Maybe put the fags back and get more food "

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Thunderdome.

2 kids enter one kid leaves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.

Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight?

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

There's only one possible way to decide. - Mortal combat! Not the video game but full contact fight to the death between the siblings.

Smoke a couple of the cigarettes you had enough money for as you watch your offspring kill each other. Sell the loser's body to medical scientists.

Bish bash bosh extra cash, one less mouth to feed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.

Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight? "

The irony of this post

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.

Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight?

The irony of this post "

It's not ironic, it's sarcastic. My UC actually did come in on Monday.

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By *ty31Man
over a year ago

NW London

Forget the food and use the money to buy a cheap bottle of vodka. If you get them d*unk they'll forget that they're hungry

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Well, my universal credit came in yesterday and I've spent it a on a month's supply of white lightening and vape juice. The kids can forage in the bins behind aldi.

Seriously though, are there any other disadvantaged groups you fancy having a pop at tonight?

The irony of this post

It's not ironic, it's sarcastic. My UC actually did come in on Monday."

Fair enough, but I have nothing against universal credit or most of the people on it

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

Cliquebait

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Cliquebait "

Cliquebait?

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Cliquebait

Cliquebait?"

Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay!

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

Choose the less irritating one at the time? That’s how I do it

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Cliquebait

Cliquebait?

Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay! "

I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Cliquebait

Cliquebait?

Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay!

I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button"

How can that be? You’re so funny.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Cliquebait

Cliquebait?

Oh just that this is one of the clickbait threads where if you have any popularity on the forum you can get away with being off colour jokey about other situations that are painful to others. It’s cool, it’s bantz, it’s a laugh. Yay!

I wouldn't class myself as popular. My threads often go unnoticed and when I voice an opinion its usually met with a block button

How can that be? You’re so funny. "

I can't tell if youre being sarcastic or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put the ready meal back and get a box of 6 eggs instead, then you can feed both kids scrambled eggs for the same money x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There's only one possible way to decide. - Mortal combat! Not the video game but full contact fight to the death between the siblings.

Smoke a couple of the cigarettes you had enough money for as you watch your offspring kill each other. Sell the loser's body to medical scientists.

Bish bash bosh extra cash, one less mouth to feed. "

You basically just described every Sunday dinner in my family. FYI I had 5 siblings once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is very distasteful and not funny at all .... You should be ashamed making fun of this sort of thing.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

You didn’t sell them at birth? What do you use them for?

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Go on hair colour my parents did.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"This is very distasteful and not funny at all .... You should be ashamed making fun of this sort of thing.

"

Thank you for bumping it so other people can comment

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You didn’t sell them at birth? What do you use them for?"

Someone has to get my beers from the fridge

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend "

Thay shood both be your favourite.

Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !

By some cheese £3.00

Pasta £1.00

Milk £0.80

Cheese sauce mix £0.50

Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend

Thay shood both be your favourite.

Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !

By some cheese £3.00

Pasta £1.00

Milk £0.80

Cheese sauce mix £0.50

Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort "

So what am I supposed to smoke?

You really haven't thought this through have you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give the one you like less the fags

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By *cd and scruffCouple
over a year ago

Rochester

To choose my favorite child I put them all in a sack, closed my eyes and picked one out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????

Yet it's ok you got your fags so no problem, great parenting that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????"

...No

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend

Thay shood both be your favourite.

Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !

By some cheese £3.00

Pasta £1.00

Milk £0.80

Cheese sauce mix £0.50

Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort

So what am I supposed to smoke?

You really haven't thought this through have you "

Get a 5p carrier bag, shred it and smoke that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend

Thay shood both be your favourite.

Put the fags (£10.00) and the redey meal(£2.00) back !

By some cheese £3.00

Pasta £1.00

Milk £0.80

Cheese sauce mix £0.50

Mack a home made mac n cheese big enough for all of you and you still got change to get a dezort

So what am I supposed to smoke?

You really haven't thought this through have you "

Do what they do in Dundee, go to your local town centre and look for fag stubs on the bins

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London


"Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????

Yet it's ok you got your fags so no problem, great parenting that."

Isn't it! He's my role model.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????

Yet it's ok you got your fags so no problem, great parenting that.

Isn't it! He's my role model."

He’s the kind of parent I aspire to be

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Don't buy the fags, simple.

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By *asilForty77Man
over a year ago

a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road

The mill’s closed. There’s no more work. We’re destitute. I’ve got no option but to sell you all for scientific experiments.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Choose which child can eat a meal and which can't, are you serious ????

...No"

Someone missed the humour me thinks.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

And don't buy ready meals. Expensive way of shopping.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And don't buy ready meals. Expensive way of shopping. "

Exactly. Bread and olive spread. Cheap

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

As my mom says, if my sister were in an accident, she says she'd walk over broken glass to get to her.

Me, apparently, she'd put the kettle on, have a coffee, then make her way to the hospital.

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By *cousesubsallyWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere out there


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend "

I’d sell half the fags to the kids on the estate, have the other half myself and feed both kids

Or just send them to a friend’s house for tea, no worries then - except the kids without fags

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World

I made a mental bet with myself to see how many serious answers you would get.

I lost

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Split the micro meal between them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get them boxing gloves and let them fight for it..

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By *xtrafun4youMan
over a year ago

Dunstable

Don’t buy th cigarettes kids before you, come on!

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By *xtrafun4youMan
over a year ago

Dunstable


"Pop the hungry one on eBay.

Wouldn't be long before a Madonna/Brangelina type came along and relieved you of the choice for a reasonable price."
lol lmfao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bought a pack of fags and 2 ready meals but didn't have enough money so had to put a meal back.

How do I pick which child eats tonight?

I get my universal credit in the morning so they wont have to go long.

Asking for a friend "

Feed them both. The skip behind the supermarkets always have food past their sell by date. Just cook it thoroughly and they shouldn't get the runs too bad, plus you get the money in your pocket that would have been spent on the one kid

Holly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Get them to compete in a triathlon. Winner eats. Loser passes out through lack of energy and you don't need to worry about them complaining of hunger all night. "

Hahahahahahahah brilliant!

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

What ready meal did you buy. Did you choose which kid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I made a mental bet with myself to see how many serious answers you would get.

I lost "

Did you go too high to too low?

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk


"Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs "

That's funny that's what I did as a kid. Give my food to my sister. Nothing against you. But it does happen

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't but the ready meal, buy a can of gas, let the kids have 1st go on it then when their high enough they will forget their hungry and you have gas left to fill your lighter so you can smoke your Cigs "

This is a 100% fool proof plan, I cannot see anything going wrong with this

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don’t buy th cigarettes kids before you, come on!"

As I said above, what do you suggest I smoke if I don't buy any

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By *oger51Man
over a year ago

cardiff

When I was married with 3 children if you asked my ex she would say I hate them all the same.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman
Forum Mod
over a year ago

My Own Little World


"I made a mental bet with myself to see how many serious answers you would get.

I lost

Did you go too high to too low?"

Too low.

Should know better after 10 years on here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I made a mental bet with myself to see how many serious answers you would get.

I lost

Did you go too high to too low?

Too low.

Should know better after 10 years on here."

tut tut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have 4 daughters I tell them all they are my fav but I do have one

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