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Consent equality.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Does anyone else see the hypocrisy with only men needing it?

Have no other men received a hand unexpectedly down their pants, a slap on the ass or touch on the bulge. Unasked for kisses or being dragged into a bedroom?

Why do men get treated more so as monsters in our days of equality, whilst women essential have a get out of jail free card; simply for being female.

This post has been made due to several other threads discussing similar issues. Don’t pop a cap in my ass.

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

Woman on woman consent has been more of an issue for us, when at clubs it's not unusual for Red to get felt up without knowing who it was. Every single time it's been another woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It should absolutely work both ways!

However, women experience men overstepping boundaries far more often than men do in general.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Woman on woman consent has been more of an issue for us, when at clubs it's not unusual for Red to get felt up without knowing who it was. Every single time it's been another woman."

I'll never understand why people do that!

Even if she was bi, what makes them think that means she'd want any old woman groping her?!

Surely "don't touch without permission" is a pretty simple rule to follow innit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Woman on woman consent has been more of an issue for us, when at clubs it's not unusual for Red to get felt up without knowing who it was. Every single time it's been another woman.

I'll never understand why people do that!

Even if she was bi, what makes them think that means she'd want any old woman groping her?!

Surely "don't touch without permission" is a pretty simple rule to follow innit? "
you would think so yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Know one has a right to put a hand on anyone else, without consent being given, no matter what the sex.

I feel that women are more outspoken about the fact that they have had a hand laid on them in a manner not warranted, than what men are. So it might seem like its men doing it more so than women. But it's not realistically the case.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip


"It should absolutely work both ways!

However, women experience men overstepping boundaries far more often than men do in general."

That's basically it. Men do it to women far more than the other way round, and men are less likely to care. That doesn't mean it's OK though.

I once had my bum touched. I hoped they would do it again but they didn't. That doesn't mean every man should be OK with it though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

of course it works both ways but how many men have you ever heard of resisting the advances of a woman not many I bet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"of course it works both ways but how many men have you ever heard of resisting the advances of a woman not many I bet "

Jesus Christ

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had problems with both men and women.

I think it’s discussed more on fab (about men doing the grabbing, assaulting etc) because there just happens to be more personal experiences that people share.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

aw bless. inappropriate touching is almost daily for me, and worse when I first started working back in the 80s.

unfortunately most men wouldn't bat an eye lid. Is your problem whether its a man or a woman that touches you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It should absolutely work both ways!

However, women experience men overstepping boundaries far more often than men do in general."

Surely as a woman, you’d be a little in the dark as to how women behave with men in that regard.

The fact is that men would get laughed at in this situation or it would be considered as a “result”. Whereas a women garners sympathy and is advised to report it. Thus, we only ever hear of men overstepping the line. We also never even get told that women should ask for consent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It should absolutely work both ways!

However, women experience men overstepping boundaries far more often than men do in general.

Surely as a woman, you’d be a little in the dark as to how women behave with men in that regard.

The fact is that men would get laughed at in this situation or it would be considered as a “result”. Whereas a women garners sympathy and is advised to report it. Thus, we only ever hear of men overstepping the line. We also never even get told that women should ask for consent. "

I think a lot more awareness has been happening about men being assaulted and they are less likely to be laughed at nowadays. Which is a good thing, that they are more likely to be taken seriously.

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)


"Woman on woman consent has been more of an issue for us, when at clubs it's not unusual for Red to get felt up without knowing who it was. Every single time it's been another woman.

I'll never understand why people do that!

Even if she was bi, what makes them think that means she'd want any old woman groping her?!

Surely "don't touch without permission" is a pretty simple rule to follow innit? "

It is, but for obvious reasons men have it drummed into them from an early age in a way women usually don't. So it's always at the forefront of most men's minds in that situation in a way it isn't in most women's, but it should be.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It's absolutely an issue both ways. All I do is put my money where my mouth is and not touch (look for too long, make uncomfortable sexual remarks, etc) unless it's fairly clear it's welcome. If it's at all ambiguous, I'll proceed slowly (like shoulder or elbow).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's wrong, either way round.

I doubt men are gonna complain mostly if it happened to them.

Unless it's another man doing it.

Fortunately, I'm a little intimidating. So hasn't been an issue with us at clubs, at least. From men or women.

As i would rip off any blokes head, and shit down his neck.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"aw bless. inappropriate touching is almost daily for me, and worse when I first started working back in the 80s.

unfortunately most men wouldn't bat an eye lid. Is your problem whether its a man or a woman that touches you?"

Are you speaking of the ass slap or hand on the thigh? I had a teacher that would always grasp my thigh, it was awkward. I’m not sure that it’s police territory though. Nowadays, I’m sure I would have sorted it out with some swift words though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"aw bless. inappropriate touching is almost daily for me, and worse when I first started working back in the 80s.

unfortunately most men wouldn't bat an eye lid. Is your problem whether its a man or a woman that touches you?"

And there’s the whole problem in a nutshell. Basically guys, suck it up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting topic OP. The times are a changing me thinks. Look at the strive for equality over the last twenty years or so, women have made huge strides forward but we have to take the good with the bad right? Why are people so shocked to hear about violent GIRL gangs? FEMALE teenage delinquents? FEMALE gropers? All unwanted touching is wrong, whoever does it but to be fair in the age group 35+ I do feel it’s more men that grope than females. Or am I wrong?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It's wrong, either way round.

I doubt men are gonna complain mostly if it happened to them.

Unless it's another man doing it.

Fortunately, I'm a little intimidating. So hasn't been an issue with us at clubs, at least. From men or women.

As i would rip off any blokes head, and shit down his neck.

"

Is this the same issue with women though? They may deem it to be ok (depending on circumstance) if it’s a man they have a mutual attraction to; and not if they don’t? Thus, the rules can be rather skewed for some.

Does consent destroy the “moment”? I’m rather young, growing up you’d know how to proceed judging from body language and general behaviour. I feel that there’s now a hyper-vigilance due to not really being aware of what form of consent is needed. (I’m even a tad afraid of this in clubs.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do agree that it should be a two way thing, unfortunately it isn't. In clubs I've been touched by women when it was neither appropriate nor wanted.

Would it be viewed in the same way as if it were the other way around? Definitely not.

Consent is consent, whether it's verbal or non verbal, irrespective of the gender of the parties involved.

Tea

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

UK

Within the swinging lifestyle I’ve only been touched without my consent by other women.

Consent doesn’t change depending on the genders of those involved.

I also think the tea consent video should be mandatory viewing!

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I have played in bands for many, many years now, and have seen plenty of male singers mollested by female punters... but if anyone even tried to get hands-on with ladies in the bands, they'd be barred for life.

Cal

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By *olliPineCouple
over a year ago

swingers clubs


"Does anyone else see the hypocrisy with only men needing it?

Have no other men received a hand unexpectedly down their pants, a slap on the ass or touch on the bulge. Unasked for kisses or being dragged into a bedroom?

Why do men get treated more so as monsters in our days of equality, whilst women essential have a get out of jail free card; simply for being female.

This post has been made due to several other threads discussing similar issues. Don’t pop a cap in my ass.

"

XY gets mishandled particularly on the scene but in general pubs also.

Boils our piss.

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Does anyone else see the hypocrisy with only men needing it?

Have no other men received a hand unexpectedly down their pants, a slap on the ass or touch on the bulge. Unasked for kisses or being dragged into a bedroom?

Why do men get treated more so as monsters in our days of equality, whilst women essential have a get out of jail free card; simply for being female.

This post has been made due to several other threads discussing similar issues. Don’t pop a cap in my ass.

"

I didn’t know it had been restricted in this way.

Everyone needs to participate in consent.

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It definitely works both ways. However the sexual violence that women have endured from non-consensual contact from men has generally been more troublesome, in terms of volume, severity etc that it's been higher profile. Everyone is equally important

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seen many poor behaviours from all genders and types, men generally get a harder punishment in clubs, in my experience, unsure why. Some d*unk and ‘handsy’ women get away with a lot.

Respect should just be clearly universal, it’s not easy to create that in people though if they don’t have it, when first visiting a club or party etc.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"Woman on woman consent has been more of an issue for us, when at clubs it's not unusual for Red to get felt up without knowing who it was. Every single time it's been another woman."

You know I'd ask first

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone. "

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

UK


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc. "

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men? "

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

UK


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done. "

But she is consenting - because she’s happy for them to do it. It’s not about being attractive or not. It’s whether she’s happy with what they are doing. They are playing a dangerous game by gambling on the fact she will be ok with it - but ultimately they would have no one to blame but themselves if she calls them out on it and whatever events may then happen as a result of that.

It’s no different if you flip it round. The vast majority of single men would be more than happy if a woman they found attractive grabbed their arse (using the example you gave). They would be much less happy to have their arse grabbed by a woman they didn’t find attractive. I’m not sure why you think it’s any different?

What you are trying to say to me sounds an awful lot like victim blaming - that you are shifting focus away from the men’s crappy behaviour which is what this boils down to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done. "

A few points. Is this a made up scenario? If so, then it’s a bit of non argument.

Firstly, everyone should make sure they receive clear consent. Not based on what others are doing but clear consent from the recipient. The case of the cricketer Alex Hepburn makes that abundantly clear.

Secondly, it’s not up to her if he’s charged. That’s for the CPS and if they feel there is grounds they will bring the case.

Related to the above. Any defence lawyer would exploit your scenario to the max. A conviction would be difficult.

Your scenario feels laced with misogyny and victim blaming. Sex offence convictions are amazingly low. Ipso facto, wrongful conviction even rarer.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

A few points. Is this a made up scenario? If so, then it’s a bit of non argument.

Firstly, everyone should make sure they receive clear consent. Not based on what others are doing but clear consent from the recipient. The case of the cricketer Alex Hepburn makes that abundantly clear.

Secondly, it’s not up to her if he’s charged. That’s for the CPS and if they feel there is grounds they will bring the case.

Related to the above. Any defence lawyer would exploit your scenario to the max. A conviction would be difficult.

Your scenario feels laced with misogyny and victim blaming. Sex offence convictions are amazingly low. Ipso facto, wrongful conviction even rarer. "

In what way am I victim blaming? The fact is that, the only victim is the one that the women decides is to become one. The act itself is not traumatizing, as she had allowed numerous others to do the same thing: without consent. This is not a scenario that is based upon grape(not allowed to use the word) though on a single grasp of the derrière.

Yourself and the poster above have a lack of understanding of what consent means. You can’t give consent AFTER the act has been done.

Of course it’s a made up scenario, that’s generally what a scenario refers to.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok controversial opinion...

I 100% agree that consent should go both ways - WITHOUT EXCEPTION FOR SEX.

And you shouldn’t grab someone’s ass or bulge or whatever unless you’re confident they’ll like it.

However, do I think a misjudged ass grab is worthy of police time? Nope. Is it that serious? Nope. Do I think it should require consent? Nope. It’s called flirting and people misjudge it all the time. I find it mad these days how a lot of stuff that would usually be shrugged off is now being treated as a serious crime.

I can bet 99% of the time I go out a woman is either going grab my ass, twerk up against my bulge or grab my cock through my jeans. And occasionally maybe a guy will do it too.

And do I want that to happen? Most of the time no. Do I think they did anything seriously wrong? And do I feel the need to report it? Nah not really. Just showing I’m not interested is usually enough.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

But she is consenting - because she’s happy for them to do it. It’s not about being attractive or not. It’s whether she’s happy with what they are doing. They are playing a dangerous game by gambling on the fact she will be ok with it - but ultimately they would have no one to blame but themselves if she calls them out on it and whatever events may then happen as a result of that.

It’s no different if you flip it round. The vast majority of single men would be more than happy if a woman they found attractive grabbed their arse (using the example you gave). They would be much less happy to have their arse grabbed by a woman they didn’t find attractive. I’m not sure why you think it’s any different?

What you are trying to say to me sounds an awful lot like victim blaming - that you are shifting focus away from the men’s crappy behaviour which is what this boils down to. "

They may not be happy. They would however, not see it as an issue for the police. I understand that women get it more often. Though, surely if it’s to be deterred, the start would be to allow no touching without consent.

A crime is a crime which should mean that all of the men in the scenario should be charged. Your response, with the one beneath, proves that there is no basis for it to be considered a crime.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

A few points. Is this a made up scenario? If so, then it’s a bit of non argument.

Firstly, everyone should make sure they receive clear consent. Not based on what others are doing but clear consent from the recipient. The case of the cricketer Alex Hepburn makes that abundantly clear.

Secondly, it’s not up to her if he’s charged. That’s for the CPS and if they feel there is grounds they will bring the case.

Related to the above. Any defence lawyer would exploit your scenario to the max. A conviction would be difficult.

Your scenario feels laced with misogyny and victim blaming. Sex offence convictions are amazingly low. Ipso facto, wrongful conviction even rarer.

In what way am I victim blaming? The fact is that, the only victim is the one that the women decides is to become one. The act itself is not traumatizing, as she had allowed numerous others to do the same thing: without consent. This is not a scenario that is based upon grape(not allowed to use the word) though on a single grasp of the derrière.

Yourself and the poster above have a lack of understanding of what consent means. You can’t give consent AFTER the act has been done.

Of course it’s a made up scenario, that’s generally what a scenario refers to.....

"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

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By *ave-and-LouiseCouple
over a year ago

Torquay

When I was a waiter/barman/VIP table host in a local club years ago, (18 and fresh out of college)I got groped by older d*unk women all the time, literally every night. I didn't think much of it at the time but with the huge recent focus on inappropriate male behaviour towards women, I realise now that I should have made more of a fuss at the time. I have friends who are doormen in clubs who tell me nothing has changed and they get it too. But mostly they like the attention it seems... D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When I was a waiter/barman/VIP table host in a local club years ago, (18 and fresh out of college)I got groped by older d*unk women all the time, literally every night. I didn't think much of it at the time but with the huge recent focus on inappropriate male behaviour towards women, I realise now that I should have made more of a fuss at the time. I have friends who are doormen in clubs who tell me nothing has changed and they get it too. But mostly they like the attention it seems... D "

You shouldn’t have made more fuss. Go with your gut. If you didn’t think much of it then it wasn’t a big deal.

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views. "

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

"

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained."

This is exactly my point. It seems that it’s a crime for one gender yet, a free for all with the other.

There’s a power imbalance. A crime should be a crime, irrespective of their gender.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that. "

If I changed the women to being a man in my scenario, would I then be a misandrist?

No, because it’s a completely fabricated situation.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained.

This is exactly my point. It seems that it’s a crime for one gender yet, a free for all with the other.

There’s a power imbalance. A crime should be a crime, irrespective of their gender.

"

He said people...not the police

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that.

If I changed the women to being a man in my scenario, would I then be a misandrist?

No, because it’s a completely fabricated situation....."

And the way you fabricated it shows your leanings.... bad woman/ victim men.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that.

If I changed the women to being a man in my scenario, would I then be a misandrist?

No, because it’s a completely fabricated situation.....

And the way you fabricated it shows your leanings.... bad woman/ victim men. "

I think that your reading comprehension is lacking. I’m discussing why it’s deemed a crime if it’s a man blamed and a mockery of it’s a woman. That’s not equality. Thus the title name....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained.

This is exactly my point. It seems that it’s a crime for one gender yet, a free for all with the other.

There’s a power imbalance. A crime should be a crime, irrespective of their gender.

He said people...not the police "

I mentioned neither......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained.

This is exactly my point. It seems that it’s a crime for one gender yet, a free for all with the other.

There’s a power imbalance. A crime should be a crime, irrespective of their gender.

He said people...not the police

I mentioned neither......"

Well it's only likely to be considered a crime if the people he complained to were the police

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that.

If I changed the women to being a man in my scenario, would I then be a misandrist?

No, because it’s a completely fabricated situation.....

And the way you fabricated it shows your leanings.... bad woman/ victim men.

I think that your reading comprehension is lacking. I’m discussing why it’s deemed a crime if it’s a man blamed and a mockery of it’s a woman. That’s not equality. Thus the title name...."

Carry on with the insults. Meanwhile I shall go and beat my head against a wall

I’ll finish with an old insult though. You really can’t argue with stupid.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Well done for being condescending. I fully understand what consent means.

The reason I asked whether this is a made up scenario and not based on fact is that you’re assuming a woman would deliberately go out of her way to report just the one guy because he’s not attractive (that’s your misogyny showing).

The victim blaming comes in because you assume the woman is at fault for being touched up rather than looking to the men who should of verified that they had consent first.

Now if you can actually find a case where this has happened, then let’s discuss it. At the moment your making up a scenario that suits your own (misogynistic) views.

I think that you should look up the definitions of misogyny and victim blaming, neither of which I have shown. The scenario is based upon how it can be open to abuse. I already stated that it was not based on an actual case, (SCENARIO) though, there have been plenty of false accusations over the years for similar. I’m sure you’re aware that such things happen.

You had said that the others had not committed a crime in this scenario. You said that she had given consent by not complaining AFTER the act had been done. This proves that there is no evidence nor fair way to judge a case such as this. It means that your argument helps my own argument.

You’ve shown plenty of both. If you can’t see that then, as the saying goes, you’re part of the problem.

Regarding the consent afterwards, it’s not up to her who gets charged as I said above. I don’t really see what’s so hard to grasp with that.

If I changed the women to being a man in my scenario, would I then be a misandrist?

No, because it’s a completely fabricated situation.....

And the way you fabricated it shows your leanings.... bad woman/ victim men.

I think that your reading comprehension is lacking. I’m discussing why it’s deemed a crime if it’s a man blamed and a mockery of it’s a woman. That’s not equality. Thus the title name....

Carry on with the insults. Meanwhile I shall go and beat my head against a wall

I’ll finish with an old insult though. You really can’t argue with stupid....."

I have no insults. I merely stated that you’re clearly not understanding the point of this thread....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i would never do it or have it done to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP I don't think you are quite grasping how consent works. It isn't always before the act, the acceptance of the act can also be classed as consent.

Take this scenario your having vaginal sex with a girl, and you decided to switch to anal, she allows you to continue with that act, without any word of NO. Now you had to perform the act and await the reaction, if she had said "No" or "Stop" after you had done the sex act, I'm sure like 99% of men you would comply and cease the act. The CPS would have a very hard time even attempting to meet a threshold of conviction against you because when she said no or stop you ceased. Therefore you respected her consent. Same goes for groping. If you grope someone and they bat your hand off or verbally signal no, that's a clear sign they do not consent to you continuing with the act, should you do so after the clear instructionn not to then yes your be open to a charge of a sexual offence rather than harrassment which in some circcumstances even the first grope could get you, but they are difficult to charge.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yeah women have touched me without my consent.

People laughed when I complained.

This is exactly my point. It seems that it’s a crime for one gender yet, a free for all with the other.

There’s a power imbalance. A crime should be a crime, irrespective of their gender.

He said people...not the police

I mentioned neither......

Well it's only likely to be considered a crime if the people he complained to were the police "

I had created a scenario of the criminality of non-consensual touching. Let’s just call it a crime against oneself to steer us away from an inevitable argument

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

when i was young and went to clubs and you got touched up a quick stilleto in the foot sorted them out. Im not talking serious assault im talking general groping

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By *winkleFairyCouple
over a year ago

UK


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

But she is consenting - because she’s happy for them to do it. It’s not about being attractive or not. It’s whether she’s happy with what they are doing. They are playing a dangerous game by gambling on the fact she will be ok with it - but ultimately they would have no one to blame but themselves if she calls them out on it and whatever events may then happen as a result of that.

It’s no different if you flip it round. The vast majority of single men would be more than happy if a woman they found attractive grabbed their arse (using the example you gave). They would be much less happy to have their arse grabbed by a woman they didn’t find attractive. I’m not sure why you think it’s any different?

What you are trying to say to me sounds an awful lot like victim blaming - that you are shifting focus away from the men’s crappy behaviour which is what this boils down to.

They may not be happy. They would however, not see it as an issue for the police. I understand that women get it more often. Though, surely if it’s to be deterred, the start would be to allow no touching without consent.

A crime is a crime which should mean that all of the men in the scenario should be charged. Your response, with the one beneath, proves that there is no basis for it to be considered a crime. "

Why are you so convinced the women in question would see it as an issue for the police but men wouldn’t? I can assure you I’ve had my arse grabbed without my consent more times than I can count and I’ve never once involved the police.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Concent should be the same for all genders. I get your point and their is a disparity of attitudes. All should be more considerate of consent, not just men. But are you surprised of this disparity in the focus and conduct of concent? Not justifying any acts without consent but often people have a very obscured idea of equality IMO. How can we use the approach and proportionality when the things you are compairing are not like for like? On the whole the male and the female experience in this world are poles apart. The reason why so much focus is on men to behave is because men are on the whole the ones misbehaving. You'd have to be blind or ignorant if you can not see this on a daily basis. So naturally this doesn't excuse women and maybe many women need to learn about respecting others dignity too. But if you were to make a logical triage of the situation it follows that men would be vastly in the spotlight when it comes to attitudes towards sexual misconduct. It's not a nice feeling as a man to be under this spot light, but neither is it nice to understand the reasons why we are under it in the first place. This is why things need to change for everyone.

The situation is though, some men will be able to get away with this behaviour. Let's take an attractive lady on a night out, she attracts lots of naughty hands. She desires and enjoys the attention - until an undesirable does so.

Is it then fair, that just due to the one man not being as attractive as the other men; that are participating in the same behaviour (without consent) is the one that ends up being accused of sexual misconduct?

I keep my hands to myself, so this is not in relation to myself. It's merely a scenario that, seems to be becoming a form of Russian roulette for men on nights out. I'm making this post, based upon an ass grab etc.

You are misunderstanding consent though. If she is happy with their behaviour then essentially they have her permission, she is consenting to them doing it.

You make it sound like you are essentially trying to blame the woman for only desiring certain men?

I'm not blaming anyone, it's a scenario...

I'm merely stating that she's given no consent to any of the men within the scenario. Though, she's allowed to have an individual charged with a crime, due to not being as attractive as the others that had done the same thing.

It's rather unfair is it not? Surely if it's a crime for the less attractive gent, it should also be a crime for the rest, or none at all. Unless, of course they asked for consent first, which none in the scenario had done.

But she is consenting - because she’s happy for them to do it. It’s not about being attractive or not. It’s whether she’s happy with what they are doing. They are playing a dangerous game by gambling on the fact she will be ok with it - but ultimately they would have no one to blame but themselves if she calls them out on it and whatever events may then happen as a result of that.

It’s no different if you flip it round. The vast majority of single men would be more than happy if a woman they found attractive grabbed their arse (using the example you gave). They would be much less happy to have their arse grabbed by a woman they didn’t find attractive. I’m not sure why you think it’s any different?

What you are trying to say to me sounds an awful lot like victim blaming - that you are shifting focus away from the men’s crappy behaviour which is what this boils down to.

They may not be happy. They would however, not see it as an issue for the police. I understand that women get it more often. Though, surely if it’s to be deterred, the start would be to allow no touching without consent.

A crime is a crime which should mean that all of the men in the scenario should be charged. Your response, with the one beneath, proves that there is no basis for it to be considered a crime.

Why are you so convinced the women in question would see it as an issue for the police but men wouldn’t? I can assure you I’ve had my arse grabbed without my consent more times than I can count and I’ve never once involved the police. "

Because it’s a scenario that was invented by myself?

Let’s face it, there isn’t much information on what IS considered as consent and what ISN’T. Everyone is aware when it comes to sex and prolonged groping. When it comes to, what was once considered as mild flirting in a club: the lines have become blurred.

The thread has become derailed slightly though.

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