FabSwingers.com forum: Fab cliches

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What’s the one that makes you cringe/laugh/wince? I’ll start with “treat with respect and you will be rewarded” - cringe! What’s yours?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He/she has a body/pussy/cock/boobs/legs to die for."

Ludicrous, would you really die for it?

"I'm up for anything"

No you're not, you said no when I asked if I could penetrate your arse with my ghost chilli infused walrus dildo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't bite etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sucks like a dyson love it so much its even in one of my veris or at least domrthing similar

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By *ayMyName2018Man
over a year ago

Where the Wild Things Are

The White Knight.

They’re everywhere....

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"The White Knight.

They’re everywhere....

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By *LIRTWITHUSCouple
over a year ago

Chester

Treat with respect, seriously does this need to be even said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two threads with the same title OP? Greedy lol

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

"What’s the one that makes you cringe/laugh/wince? I’ll start with “treat with respect and you will be rewarded” - cringe! What’s yours?

That's my top cringe maker too

Russian Roulette

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

“Made me cum all night” - really now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 26/06/19 08:48:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Made me cum all night” - really now?

"
some of us got the gift

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Sorry for the random message...."

It's hardly bloody random, you looked at the pictures, read the profile (in some cases), that's not random!!!!

Ahhhh, feel better now

Jo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't bite, unless I'm asked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can ask you a question?"

You just did you muppet!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""Sorry for the random message...."

It's hardly bloody random, you looked at the pictures, read the profile (in some cases), that's not random!!!!

Ahhhh, feel better now

Jo x"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""Can ask you a question?"

You just did you muppet!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s a useful filter....

Quite often said by people who are apparently only here for the forums.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry, you're not my type

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Remember me?

No. I'm a site supporter, I can see we've never spoken before but nice try!

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

"Treat with respect, seriously does this need to be even said

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

""He/she has a body/pussy/cock/boobs/legs to die for."

Ludicrous, would you really die for it?

"I'm up for anything"

No you're not, you said no when I asked if I could penetrate your arse with my ghost chilli infused walrus dildo.

Haha just spat my breakfast out reading that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Made me cum all night” - really now?

some of us got the gift

Only because you read my book!!

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

I know I’ve no chance.....

You must have 100’s of messages.....

Wanna make you my cum slut.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Made me cum all night” - really now?

some of us got the gift

Only because you read my book!!

LJ"
yeah inspired by my actions thanks for that ghostwriter

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By *eastAndTheHarlotCouple
over a year ago

Hartlepool

'genuine'

I'm just a GENUINE guy

Totally GENUINE

100% GENUINE here

All GENUINE me like

Just stop!! Do you even know what that word means? I've heard it so many times my brain has started to do that thing when it second guesses if the word is real!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""He/she has a body/pussy/cock/boobs/legs to die for."

Ludicrous, would you really die for it?

"I'm up for anything"

No you're not, you said no when I asked if I could penetrate your arse with my ghost chilli infused walrus dildo.

Haha just spat my breakfast out reading that

My apologies, can I buy you a new breakfast?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Made me cum all night” - really now?

some of us got the gift

Only because you read my book!!

LJyeah inspired by my actions thanks for that ghostwriter

A team effort

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“I’m all you need” and the next sentence “I can break you”. Wtf?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

‘Whats black p*ssy like?’

That one disconbobulates and behooves me everytime. Ethnicity has nothing to do with sexual ability.

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"“I’m all you need” and the next sentence “I can break you”. Wtf?"

“all you need is me!”

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I know you don't meet Men, but I'm blah, blah, blah"!

So many it's unbelievable.

It is 'My' Preference,just saying!

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'Bbc' yes your black, but your average at best so stop lying

'Treat with respect' really? Oh ok i was going to go round and throw my dinner at her

'Professional' professional..... what?

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Here's a new one,

amazing ass...do you ever get it massaged...

Oh dear

Jo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The White Knight.

They’re everywhere....

As they fall over each other to reassure every woman that her pics are 'stunning, btw'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“I’m all you need” and the next sentence “I can break you”. Wtf?

“all you need is me!”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is anyone else getting the message offering to pay for services rendered as his wife is ill?

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

""He/she has a body/pussy/cock/boobs/legs to die for."

Ludicrous, would you really die for it?

"I'm up for anything"

No you're not, you said no when I asked if I could penetrate your arse with my ghost chilli infused walrus dildo.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

"I can give oral for hours" - if you do, you have no idea, and she'll be filing her nails and reading a book, making a shopping list etc while you are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*Meeting by webcam* 'Chatted with this wee cracker on cam. Can't wait till we meet up'

You're never meeting up, pal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I absolutely hate the ones who hide themselves behind their so called sexual 'preferences' by disregarding the feeling of the ones they do not wish to meet.

And the worst is when they act like a frightened virgins on the forums when they get messages saying that they are racist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Remember me?

No. I'm a site supporter, I can see we've never spoken before but nice try! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s the one that makes you cringe/laugh/wince? I’ll start with “treat with respect and you will be rewarded” - cringe! What’s yours?

"
I never judge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Genuine and/or professional. Even worse when used together. Genuine and professional what exactly? Is it even relevant on here?! Horny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is anyone else getting the message offering to pay for services rendered as his wife is ill?"

Indeed, along with messages of a massive allowance for meeting once a week eh naw! Off you pop

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By *irty desireWoman
over a year ago

newcatle

Hey you horny!!!!

My reply is nope am currently on loo having a poop!clamps them every time

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By *onty JacksonMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

My fave is. . . .".I've got a magic tounge". . . .tounge?. . . fucking TOUNGE. . . do you mean TONGUE?. . . you do mean tongue so, does it do card tricks and pull rabbits from hats?

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Discrete

No , I thought we might go into a local park in the daytime and strip you naked and ram a 12 inch dildo up your asshole

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By *irty desireWoman
over a year ago

newcatle

Am in a sexless marriage another gripe!!

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

honest and trustworthy, yet married!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is anyone else getting the message offering to pay for services rendered as his wife is ill?

Indeed, along with messages of a massive allowance for meeting once a week eh naw! Off you pop "

. Like being in the same category as you..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hallelujah for this thread today. Needed a good laugh and don’t feel so alone now

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

the one about 'I will lick you until you cum', fook off, never cum externally through oral - avoid, avoid, avoid!

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By *inkysexpotMan
over a year ago

leeds

Genuine, honest and trustworthy but in the profile states needs to be discreet because they are married.

Before messaging give yourself the once over and think....are you worthy.

Anything goes and then you see they have commented in the forum they will never do a certain sexual act.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Professional couple x

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By *sianMancMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"What’s the one that makes you cringe/laugh/wince? I’ll start with “treat with respect and you will be rewarded” - cringe! What’s yours?

When they say they are discreet or want discretion but have their fake face pics posted everywhere for all to see. Usually a filter lover creating a profile to get back at an ex lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

“Sweetest tasting pussy!” If it’s clean it shouldn’t taste of anything!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Sweetest tasting pussy!” If it’s clean it shouldn’t taste of anything! "
corse it should dependent on diet same as men real pussy juice tastes different every one has there own flavour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Sweetest tasting pussy!” If it’s clean it shouldn’t taste of anything! corse it should dependent on diet same as men real pussy juice tastes different every one has there own flavour"
banana omg love when it has a hint of banana

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Free WiFi.

The download speed always runs at about 0.5Mbs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking for a friend who enjoys meals out, drinks and lives local within 3 minutes if they live any more than 3 minutes away we're just not gonna meet, you will be blocked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many to mention

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By *unkym34Man
over a year ago

London

"Too many to mention "
this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“It’s a no from me.”

FFS, you’re not Simon Cowell.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

When one describes themselves as professional

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just block don't think twice about it.

It acts as a wonderful filter.

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

Oooooo treat them well or else.......

Yeh ok scary....

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By *eorge JetsonMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"your the most beautiful woman on this site by miles"

Seriously?? I'm now pushing a size 18. My arse is giving XL space hoppers a run for their money. My tits are becoming nothing short of hanging sandbags and when I drag my spacehopper sized arse out of bed I look like I've had a budget facial that didn't go to plan, AND out of a rough guess of 12 thousand women from single AND couples you think I'm the most beautiful one here!!!

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By *eorge JetsonMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

Ooohhhh.

And here's another classic.

Signed off at the end of a verification.

"Until our next meet my darling"

Then no more verifications for 18 months then the very next verification is from an unconvincing crossdresser.

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By *_RiderMan
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"'genuine'

I'm just a GENUINE guy

Totally GENUINE

100% GENUINE here

All GENUINE me like

Just stop!! Do you even know what that word means? I've heard it so many times my brain has started to do that thing when it second guesses if the word is real! "

Genuinely?

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

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By *_RiderMan
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Lists of what they don't like and not looking for.

Erm... not really telling people what you want.

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

Land rover that's the word

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

Land rover that's the word

"
or disco to the petrol heads

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By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

Land rover that's the word

or disco to the petrol heads

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 30/06/19 10:54:18]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely go back for this one vroooooom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"[Clique removed by poster at 31/06/99 19:52:38]"

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

Land rover that's the word

or disco to the petrol heads

No, a Disco is the Discovery, Land Rover is Landie, that covers the 90 and 110.

And most Disco's are Derv, so more Derv heads than petrol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""He/she has a body/pussy/cock/boobs/legs to die for."

Ludicrous, would you really die for it?

"I'm up for anything"

No you're not, you said no when I asked if I could penetrate your arse with my ghost chilli infused walrus dildo.

Within context lol. Nobody is up for that

. Leci

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont bite,unless you ask me too. Yawn lol

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

Land rover that's the word

or disco to the petrol heads

No, a Disco is the Discovery, Land Rover is Landie, that covers the 90 and 110.

And most Disco's are Derv, so more Derv heads than petrol!

"
yes I know it’s a private joke between me an Suzuki as she thought it was a van I’m my picture and I pointed out it was a discovery

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Verification’s saying “ treat this one with respect”

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

“I am a __year old woman looking to meet men” ......and nothing else on their profile......

“bj Queen”........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Made me cum all night” - really now?

LIARS!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Attach face picture with message.... yet they have no profile picture or any in a gallery.

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"I absolutely hate the ones who hide themselves behind their so called sexual 'preferences' by disregarding the feeling of the ones they do not wish to meet.

And the worst is when they act like a frightened virgins on the forums when they get messages saying that they are racist.

What feeling exactly do delicate male flowers get when they find out some women in the world are not attracted to someone like them? Shock horror!

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

So don't read if your reading comprehension is not up to scratch. The longest profiles cannot be longer than a page and a half of text.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

So don't read if your reading comprehension is not up to scratch. The longest profiles cannot be longer than a page and a half of text."
you wouldn’t happen to have one of them long boring profiles full of drivel would you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You must have a face pic with your first message or you will be ignored, has no pics whatsoever on profile.

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"You must have a face pic with your first message or you will be ignored, has no pics whatsoever on profile."

Private photos! Direct send!

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

So don't read if your reading comprehension is not up to scratch. The longest profiles cannot be longer than a page and a half of text. you wouldn’t happen to have one of them long boring profiles full of drivel would you "

I meant for it to be that way and I warn people at the beginning that I am an extremely boring woman.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

I meant for it to be that way and I warn people at the beginning that I am an extremely boring woman.

"
39 people found you ok so I think your profile is a winner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

I meant for it to be that way and I warn people at the beginning that I am an extremely boring woman.

Nothing wrong with your profile, you articulate everything you expect from anyone you're likely to meet from using this site and it would likely put off anyone who wouldn't put the effort in.

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

I meant for it to be that way and I warn people at the beginning that I am an extremely boring woman.

Nothing wrong with your profile, you articulate everything you expect from anyone you're likely to meet from using this site and it would likely put off anyone who wouldn't put the effort in."

You are too smart. I am scared.

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

"Long boring profiles with lists of demands (divas) then put the insert the secret word (proves to them you’ve read the drivel apparently)

I meant for it to be that way and I warn people at the beginning that I am an extremely boring woman.

39 people found you ok so I think your profile is a winner

We have met in person.

I was very boring.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

‘BBC only’ makes my skin crawl

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By *ugarbaby777TV/TS
over a year ago

Sheffield

“Been here before” on profiles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Been here before” on profiles "

And "I know how this site works" !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Real women have curves"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cringe when men send messages saying how they love me because I'm a curvy REAL woman and bones are for dogs anyway. I'm sure it happens the other way around too.

It makes me die a little inside

it's even worse than dick pics.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just came across your profile! Really!!!!

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I've recently received a message..."Hi honey, I just came across your profile. Would you like to give me a blowjob?" Included with the message is a pic of his penis..

. No thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Been here before” on profiles "

this OP

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I've recently received a message..."Hi honey, I just came across your profile. Would you like to give me a blowjob?" Included with the message is a pic of his penis..

. No thanks"

Apologies but I thought it was worth a shot..... can travel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've recently received a message..."Hi honey, I just came across your profile. Would you like to give me a blowjob?" Included with the message is a pic of his penis..

. No thanks

Apologies but I thought it was worth a shot..... can travel

Have penis can travel...lol...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the best thread ever!

Treat with respect - HATE IT

In fact most varies and status’s make me puke and block!

I love cringe comedy but in real life? These people should have to go on a course like speed awareness complimented with a massive fine.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I've recently received a message..."Hi honey, I just came across your profile. Would you like to give me a blowjob?" Included with the message is a pic of his penis..

. No thanks

Apologies but I thought it was worth a shot..... can travel

Have penis can travel...lol..."

Stalker....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“This is the best thread ever”

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

""Real women have curves""

Well, they do, but of all kinds of shapes and sizes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men this side of 80 in ‘underpants’

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By *lloverkisserMan
over a year ago

preston

"Wow/ well , what can I say..."

How about something more original

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"What’s the one that makes you cringe/laugh/wince? I’ll start with “treat with respect and you will be rewarded” - cringe! What’s yours?

Forum thread OP's going unlos.....

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