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Whats biggest change in your life

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Mines gotta be that I am openly bi, have been for couple of years now and am comfortable enough for people around me to know and with that came a gf that loves who I am including my loce of nylons etc and she loces that now I will pamper myself, shaving and staying smooth etc.. Two years prior I was still the hard fronted, disciplined ex squaddie.. Massive changes for me but my demeanour has changed, no hidden secrets means I can live my life the way I want and need to, as a result no longer angry inside

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I changed my brand of wash powder and life has been pretty good so far

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I was married for 25 years then my husband died.

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By *orksRockerMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Married for 18years and out of the blue, told she wanted no more only to find out later that's because she found someone else from her past.

That does cause ripples in your life.. Hmmm

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Aye ripples such as those, relationship wise can feel more like tsunamis.. One minute had everything.. Land, house, horses etc.. Next minute had childhood ptsd, lost everything, lived rough dealing with issues I never realised I had.. But like me, you will surface and flourish once again..

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I had a fair few but my ex wife expectantly leaving me and running of with her step cousin was the biggest. I loved her and it totally came out the blue. My life, future and perception of the world crashing down around me. Things got even worse for my mental state when I started digging and realised how emotionally and mentality manipulative she had been for years and so many other lie. I really didnt know what was real anymore. Put me in darkest place I'd ever been. And to top it off I found myself suddenly on my own to raise a 4 year old and a 6 month old baby while also in the middle of buying a house and moving. That was the biggest and hardest upheaval in my life. I was truly broken for a point, I think it was having the kids to raise that saved me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mum dying suddenly and she was the main carer for other family members. I had to take on her role. I had to move north give up my job I loved move from my friends to a new area. I'm still struggling to settle in now a year and a half later.

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire


"I was married for 25 years then my husband died."

Sorry to hear that x

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

My dad passing away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having 3 deaths in the space of 2 months .... Dog had to be put down, my stepbrother died of a heart attack while sleeping then my grandma died a month later and this was 2 year ago.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

Meeting someone who just 'gets me' and for some bizarre reason finds the things about me that annoy others adorable, and doesn't just finish my sentences, but starts them with me. I'll let you all go now....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meeting someone who just 'gets me' and for some bizarre reason finds the things about me that annoy others adorable, and doesn't just finish my sentences, but starts them with me. I'll let you all go now.... "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Suddenly finding myself single at 50, but then realising that I’d been in an abusive relationship and it was actually the best thing that could have happened to me x

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

Becoming a parent is probably the biggest and most important change in my life. And I’ve loved every minute.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too many to put in an open forum

I think the adversities we face are there for a reason

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"I was married for 25 years then my husband died.

Sorry to hear that x"

Thank you. He gave me the gift of four wonderful children.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Losing my Mum from lung cancer then 9 days later Dad dying on the day of my Mums funeral (Ali) most difficult and heartbreaking year of my life

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Losing my Mum from lung cancer then 9 days later Dad dying on the day of my Mums funeral (Ali) most difficult and heartbreaking year of my life "

So sad. Must have been such a difficult time for you.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Has to be having my son, life changed completely, but I wouldn’t be without him.

Followed by the day I walked out on his father leaving everything behind except our clothes and the lads things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Losing my Mum from lung cancer then 9 days later Dad dying on the day of my Mums funeral (Ali) most difficult and heartbreaking year of my life

So sad. Must have been such a difficult time for you. "
It was my Dad had been battling bone cancer and renal problems for years and was in hospital so didn't get to my mums funeral. When we went in to see him to say it had gone well and a lot of friends had turned up etc. he told me and my sisters he was ready to go with her and 4 hours later he was dead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has to be having my son, life changed completely, but I wouldn’t be without him.

Followed by the day I walked out on his father leaving everything behind except our clothes and the lads things. "

Good for you although it must have been really tough at the time..,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has to be having my son, life changed completely, but I wouldn’t be without him.

Followed by the day I walked out on his father leaving everything behind except our clothes and the lads things. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Realising one day that I’m totally alone in a foreign country with a husband I no longer have the slightest interest in. Trying to find a new job in a new place and start from complete scratch is proving to be harder than I thought.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Losing my Mum from lung cancer then 9 days later Dad dying on the day of my Mums funeral (Ali) most difficult and heartbreaking year of my life

So sad. Must have been such a difficult time for you. It was my Dad had been battling bone cancer and renal problems for years and was in hospital so didn't get to my mums funeral. When we went in to see him to say it had gone well and a lot of friends had turned up etc. he told me and my sisters he was ready to go with her and 4 hours later he was dead "

Oh my so sad, I just can’t imagine how you felt. Hugs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Realising one day that I’m totally alone in a foreign country with a husband I no longer have the slightest interest in. Trying to find a new job in a new place and start from complete scratch is proving to be harder than I thought."

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Having heart failure around the same time as my sister died from cancer.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Realising one day that I’m totally alone in a foreign country with a husband I no longer have the slightest interest in. Trying to find a new job in a new place and start from complete scratch is proving to be harder than I thought."

That must be really difficult,

I hope it gets easier for you soon, x

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place


"Realising one day that I’m totally alone in a foreign country with a husband I no longer have the slightest interest in. Trying to find a new job in a new place and start from complete scratch is proving to be harder than I thought."

You’ll get through it. The best is yet to come!

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

Jan 2015 changed my life forever.

I got my life back, finally stood up to my ex. Walked about nursing what was left of my sanity

I lost a ridiculous amount of weight, started to rebuild my life

Then over the next 12 months I lost 9 people, starting in April with my dad who died of cancer related complications.

Another was murdered, stabbed to death in a road rage incident minutes after he left me.

2 more died when a bloody great plane crashed, there a wernt even supposed to be there, they were waiting for me.

The others, all taken by cancer, all too young, all had so much to live for.

It was the hardest year of my life, I went into a very black hole.

My mum & kids were the only thing that stopped me giving up completly.

I realised how short & fragile our lives can be, how nothing is guaranteed, to stop putting things off, to go out and have adventures, to live, really live.

My Phoenix is dedicated to learning to live again, and the friends who are always in my heart

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lost 2 and half stone and found i have power

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Realising one day that I’m totally alone in a foreign country with a husband I no longer have the slightest interest in. Trying to find a new job in a new place and start from complete scratch is proving to be harder than I thought."

It is tough, but just one day at a time, it will get better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Losing my baby son. Ripped me apart. Then divorce after 25yrs marriage. The upside is that I'm slowly realising how abusive that marriage was.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Has to be having my son, life changed completely, but I wouldn’t be without him.

Followed by the day I walked out on his father leaving everything behind except our clothes and the lads things.

Good for you although it must have been really tough at the time..,"

Actually the leaving was so easy as been living a lie so long. The tough part was telling my 6 year old at the time.

However in his true “let’s get on with it style” when I took him to the new place to show him where we were moving to the next day the tears started. A couple of minutes later I asked if he wanted to talk, his response “you can’t cook omelettes and daddy can’t cook pasta” that’s when I knew we would be ok

My ex wasn’t there when I told the lad as he decided he didn’t want any part of it. We were out for 8 hours and not one message to see how the lad was coping with the news. When we walked back into the shared house that night the lad turned to his dad and said “I’m moving to a new place with mum and you ain’t coming” and off to bed he trotted.

The lad has made the last four years a lot easier than I thought they’d be.

The ex is a pr*t and some of his decisions are very questionable, but give him his dues he’s a good dad to the lad and when I’ve been ill this last year he’s stepped up and helped out no questions asked.

Our priority is the lad and his wellbeing and he’s realised that at last, now he’s not thinking with his lower Male brain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I had a fair few but my ex wife expectantly leaving me and running of with her step cousin was the biggest. I loved her and it totally came out the blue. My life, future and perception of the world crashing down around me. Things got even worse for my mental state when I started digging and realised how emotionally and mentality manipulative she had been for years and so many other lie. I really didnt know what was real anymore. Put me in darkest place I'd ever been. And to top it off I found myself suddenly on my own to raise a 4 year old and a 6 month old baby while also in the middle of buying a house and moving. That was the biggest and hardest upheaval in my life. I was truly broken for a point, I think it was having the kids to raise that saved me."

Your ex left her babies behind? Does she still ask to see them at all

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"Losing my baby son. Ripped me apart. Then divorce after 25yrs marriage. The upside is that I'm slowly realising how abusive that marriage was. "

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Too many to put in an open forum

I think the adversities we face are there for a reason

"

Agree and shape who we are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Having heart failure around the same time as my sister died from cancer. "

Can’t even imagine and sorry just doesn’t cut it does it?. My heart goes outs to you although yours is clearly working fine now. Survivor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Too many to put in an open forum

I think the adversities we face are there for a reason

"

Funny how it’s easier sometimes to confess to a bunch of sex crazy fuckers though

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

So many people have been through or are still going through a tough time.

I honestly don’t know how to respond to most of you, because I just can’t imagine what you’ve gone through, but you’ve come out the other side of your darkest time.

Hugs to all xx

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Too many to put in an open forum

I think the adversities we face are there for a reason

Funny how it’s easier sometimes to confess to a bunch of sex crazy fuckers though "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having to help look after my disabled little nephew. He is only two and a half years old, brain like a 3 month old apparently and he has trouble even keeping his neck straight. But i swear we have all fallen in love with the little angel.

Cutest chubby cheeks lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Meeting trim changed my life forever in the best possible way. Can't even begin to explain what an incredible impact he's had on me.

I was lost with no one to guide me, through being with him and his influences I am the best version of myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Work.... used to be salary based and any overtime was unpaid. 15 years later, the 40-60 odd overtime hours i continue to put in each month are now paid. So im happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meeting trim changed my life forever in the best possible way. Can't even begin to explain what an incredible impact he's had on me.

I was lost with no one to guide me, through being with him and his influences I am the best version of myself."

Beautiful and so happy for the both of you. But don’t forget what you’ve done for him too... ??

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By *elticgoddessTV/TS
over a year ago

Plumstead

In 09 I moved to London, split from an abusive partner and started my own business all in the space of 6 months.

10 years later I'm having fun, happy and enjoying every minute of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Learning to drive and passing my test 6 months ago at age 53 has had a huge impact on mine and my sons life and has opened up so many new possibilities

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Learning to drive and passing my test 6 months ago at age 53 has had a huge impact on mine and my sons life and has opened up so many new possibilities "

I love this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Meeting trim changed my life forever in the best possible way. Can't even begin to explain what an incredible impact he's had on me.

I was lost with no one to guide me, through being with him and his influences I am the best version of myself.

Beautiful and so happy for the both of you. But don’t forget what you’ve done for him too... ??"

I don't, we complete each other in the best possible way.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"Learning to drive and passing my test 6 months ago at age 53 has had a huge impact on mine and my sons life and has opened up so many new possibilities "

Love this, still hope for me yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our son being still born at full term. It broke me....

Our second son being emergency Section at 7 months and rushed to the special care unit in a plastic incubator, while my ex lay bleeding on an operating table, not knowing if either were going to survive....

The biggest thing though being a Dad to the most special smart kind hearted and beautiful person in my world....

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By *ummyluvvahMan
over a year ago

cove

All of the above are heartbreaking .... I’m humbled by people’s ability to carry on , for me realising that much of the time you don’t get over things but you just get used to them !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I married my childhood sweetheart, had to have IVF as couldn't conceive. I became pregnant with twins but by then my husband had changed. He turned to drink and gambling. I miscarried the babies alone whilst he was at the casino with his mates. After that, he was always angry but we tried to move on. However, one night he decided to take his frustration out on me big style and broke my arm in two places, as well as other injuries. This was a few days before I was due to go for England netball trials. He had turned into a monster. I divorced him and gave up a very comfortable life as his parents were millionaires and we too were very well off.

It was a very dark time for me and I felt embarrassed that I had been a victim of domestic abuse. He died recently of throat cancer from the boozing and fags. He left behind a son and a second ex wife.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So much heartache here that it touches the heart and the soul. We never know whats happening behind a persons bubbly facade unless we look deeper than normal. This maybe misconstrued, hopefully not, but I am a believer, certainly in my case, that everything happens for a reason and that as much as we have uphill struggles those uphills do, in time, level out and life improves. For me, i lost my sanity as well as my relationship and material things, and if not for friends, almost my life twice. But as much as it was a breakdown it was a breakthrough as I learned the truth of my childhood terrors through flashbacks, I learned the reasons for my raging at the world and over time was able to rebuild, to accept who I am, how different I am to the world in general, but more than anything I learned about hugs, about love and about what life should be.. Be open, have understanding, empathy, don t judge or follow others rules or opinions.. I wish with all my heart that you all find a sanctuary, a place where your heart, soul and mind find happiness.. Stay strong people xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cancer made me realise I wanted to live and be happy.

Meeting my partner made me realise I could.

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By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

Some sad but lovely stories on here. It's a hard lessons learned but even in our darkest moments life has a way of moving us forward.. Even when we think its impossible.

Sending big huggles to everyone

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Finding the courage to leave an abusive relationship and completely changing career paths all within a few months. It was make or break time x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After a 10year affair (he was married).

I just said NO MORE. I started to breathe again.

But to people who have lost a loved one. Day by day it gets slightly easier. For those out of abusive relationship. Learn to love yourself as your so worth it

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Losing a few relatives and friends has made me realise that life is short and we have to live it to the full.

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru


"Losing my baby son. Ripped me apart. Then divorce after 25yrs marriage. The upside is that I'm slowly realising how abusive that marriage was. "

So sorry to hear this, my grandson passed away at 24 days old. Never felt a pain like it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I married my childhood sweetheart, had to have IVF as couldn't conceive. I became pregnant with twins but by then my husband had changed. He turned to drink and gambling. I miscarried the babies alone whilst he was at the casino with his mates. After that, he was always angry but we tried to move on. However, one night he decided to take his frustration out on me big style and broke my arm in two places, as well as other injuries. This was a few days before I was due to go for England netball trials. He had turned into a monster. I divorced him and gave up a very comfortable life as his parents were millionaires and we too were very well off.

It was a very dark time for me and I felt embarrassed that I had been a victim of domestic abuse. He died recently of throat cancer from the boozing and fags. He left behind a son and a second ex wife. "

Hope you don't feel embarrassed anymore. It was his fault, not yours. X

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"So much heartache here that it touches the heart and the soul. We never know whats happening behind a persons bubbly facade unless we look deeper than normal. This maybe misconstrued, hopefully not, but I am a believer, certainly in my case, that everything happens for a reason and that as much as we have uphill struggles those uphills do, in time, level out and life improves. For me, i lost my sanity as well as my relationship and material things, and if not for friends, almost my life twice. But as much as it was a breakdown it was a breakthrough as I learned the truth of my childhood terrors through flashbacks, I learned the reasons for my raging at the world and over time was able to rebuild, to accept who I am, how different I am to the world in general, but more than anything I learned about hugs, about love and about what life should be.. Be open, have understanding, empathy, don t judge or follow others rules or opinions.. I wish with all my heart that you all find a sanctuary, a place where your heart, soul and mind find happiness.. Stay strong people xx"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having children was the biggest overall change to my life. I had to grow up, calm down and start being responsible.

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry


"I had a fair few but my ex wife expectantly leaving me and running of with her step cousin was the biggest. I loved her and it totally came out the blue. My life, future and perception of the world crashing down around me. Things got even worse for my mental state when I started digging and realised how emotionally and mentality manipulative she had been for years and so many other lie. I really didnt know what was real anymore. Put me in darkest place I'd ever been. And to top it off I found myself suddenly on my own to raise a 4 year old and a 6 month old baby while also in the middle of buying a house and moving. That was the biggest and hardest upheaval in my life. I was truly broken for a point, I think it was having the kids to raise that saved me.

Your ex left her babies behind? Does she still ask to see them at all "

No to be fair to her she is around a fair bit for the kids considering she lives 2 hours drive away. She has them every couple of weekends and about half of the time in the school holidays. Also now she rings them every few days. I try a keep her in touch and involved with as much of their life's as possible. She's not a monster, just a bit messed up. We actually have quite a good and working parenting realtionship considering the history and distance. She is still there mum and all I want is to help facilitate that relationship between her and kids.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I had a fair few but my ex wife expectantly leaving me and running of with her step cousin was the biggest. I loved her and it totally came out the blue. My life, future and perception of the world crashing down around me. Things got even worse for my mental state when I started digging and realised how emotionally and mentality manipulative she had been for years and so many other lie. I really didnt know what was real anymore. Put me in darkest place I'd ever been. And to top it off I found myself suddenly on my own to raise a 4 year old and a 6 month old baby while also in the middle of buying a house and moving. That was the biggest and hardest upheaval in my life. I was truly broken for a point, I think it was having the kids to raise that saved me.

Your ex left her babies behind? Does she still ask to see them at all

No to be fair to her she is around a fair bit for the kids considering she lives 2 hours drive away. She has them every couple of weekends and about half of the time in the school holidays. Also now she rings them every few days. I try a keep her in touch and involved with as much of their life's as possible. She's not a monster, just a bit messed up. We actually have quite a good and working parenting realtionship considering the history and distance. She is still there mum and all I want is to help facilitate that relationship between her and kids."

Thankyou for answering that was a really nosy question of me, sorry. Glad she is still there for you and them though. Xx

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

3 months ago, at the age of 25, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis..

I had known for a good few years something wasn't right, and all though its not the end of the world, its been hard.

Having D here,supporting me, loving my children and not running for the hills, has really made things so much easier to deal with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say the biggest change in my life was having a baby. I don't think anything prpares you for how that feels and how it changes your life.

I would say losing my dad too last year. It makes the world a different place and I haven't felt the same since he passed. It's a big change adjusting to life without him.

I'm glad to hear OP that you're comfortable with who you are and it sounds like your life has changed for the better now you can happily be yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd say the biggest change in my life was having a baby. I don't think anything prpares you for how that feels and how it changes your life.

I would say losing my dad too last year. It makes the world a different place and I haven't felt the same since he passed. It's a big change adjusting to life without him.

I'm glad to hear OP that you're comfortable with who you are and it sounds like your life has changed for the better now you can happily be yourself. "

Thank you, still has its ups n downs but lifes sure better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Moving our relationship to an open relationship

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By *aisyDDWoman
over a year ago

North West

Meeting someone off here

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By *llenGTWoman
over a year ago

East/West Mids


"Mines gotta be that I am openly bi, have been for couple of years now and am comfortable enough for people around me to know and with that came a gf that loves who I am including my loce of nylons etc and she loces that now I will pamper myself, shaving and staying smooth etc.. Two years prior I was still the hard fronted, disciplined ex squaddie.. Massive changes for me but my demeanour has changed, no hidden secrets means I can live my life the way I want and need to, as a result no longer angry inside "

Health scare just as I join Fab! I want the all

clear so I can play. Then It will be Armageddon ??

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