FabSwingers.com forum: Granny,s Nice Thread...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ms Crumpet has politely requested some reading matter for her return:

For Granny, the sunshine of everyones lives...

From all of us singles, and some here with wives...

We offer some reading, so tarry a while...

At the end of your long day, and enjoy a good smile...

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

We back to Pollyanna and her glad thoughts

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We back to Pollyanna and her glad thoughts"

Lol...

Anything "nice"...

Lets see if we cant get this thread "closed - too long" by the time she gets back...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

where's she gone then?

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens

Brown paper packages tied up with strings

These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels

Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles

Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings

These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes

Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes

Silver white winters that melt into springs

These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites

When the bee stings

When I'm feeling sad

I simply remember my favorite things

And then I don't feel so bad

Pass the bucket

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ms Crumpet has politely requested some reading matter for her return:

For Granny, the sunshine of everyones lives...

From all of us singles, and some here with wives...

We offer some reading, so tarry a while...

At the end of your long day, and enjoy a good smile...

...if Dr Seuss did swinging....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Biscuits

They're nice

Especially nice biscuits they do a custard cream version now they are beyond nice they are amazing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"where's she gone then?"

She popped onto the morning thread before going out...;-)

Like Arnie (And Kev)...

"She'll be back..."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ms Crumpet has politely requested some reading matter for her return:

For Granny, the sunshine of everyones lives...

From all of us singles, and some here with wives...

We offer some reading, so tarry a while...

At the end of your long day, and enjoy a good smile...

...if Dr Seuss did swinging...."

I love Green Eggs and Ham, Sam I Am...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"where's she gone then?

She popped onto the morning thread before going out...;-)

Like Arnie (And Kev)...

"She'll be back..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello Granny, I hope you are having a lovely day

p.s can we have another game of 'yes or no?' when you get back?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are holes in the sky, where the rain comes in. But they are everso small. That's why rain is thin.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/02/12 08:59:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As the icy winds blow -

all the trees face north,

as Winter sets upon them,

it's frozen mark of ownership.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I write upon my knee. I see I write upon a tree. The paper that I put to pen, will never be a tree again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think that I will never see

A thing more lovely than a tree...

For haps unless the billboards fall,

I'll never see a tree at all.

*Anon*

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

Bump

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

Haikus can be fun

But they don't always make sense

Refrigerator

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

New age Gran xx

Grandma changed

In the dim and distant past

When lifes tempo wasnt so fast,

Grandma used to rock and knit,

Crochet, chat and baby sit.

When the kids were in a jam,

They could always call on Gram.

But today she’s in the gym

Exercising to keep slim.

She’s checking the web or surfing the net, for people to meet.

Sending some e-mail or placing a bet.

Nothing seems to stop or block her,

Now that Grandma’s off her rocker and living life like a 20 year old sexing it up and getting down and dirty my new age gran x

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By *orkieMan
over a year ago

Who knows

Roses are red,

Violets are twisted

Bend right over

You`re gonna get fi***d

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

bollocks......well...i like em

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"bollocks......well...i like em

"
to nibble on or just look at ,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Time for afternoon tea. Nice biscuit anyone?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,

Guess I'll go eat worms,

Long, thin, slimy ones; Short, fat, juicy ones,

Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms.

Down goes the first one, down goes the second one,

Oh how they wiggle and squirm.

Up comes the first one, up comes the second one,

Oh how they wiggle and squirm.

I bite off the heads, and suck out the juice

And throw the skins away

Nobody knows how fat I grow

On worms three times a day

Ohh...nobody loves me.

Chomp off their heads and squeeze out the juice

And throw their tails away

Nobody knows how I survive

On worms three times a day

ong thin slimy ones slip down easily

Short fat fuzzy ones don't

Short fat fuzzy ones stick to your teeth

And the juice goes slurpin' (slurping noise) down your throat

Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,

think I'll go eat worms...

big fat juicy ones, little slimy skinny ones,

hope they don't have germs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By Christian D. Larson

I Promise Myself...

To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.

To make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet.

To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on my side, so long as I am true to the best that is in me.

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By *aceytopWoman
over a year ago

from a town near you

you do know shes gonna slate the lot of you for all this nicey nicey dont you,but i think she will be secretly pleased

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By *razydriver8Couple
over a year ago

plymouth

Oh, I wish I were a glow worm,

a glow worm’s never glum.

‘Cause how can you be grumpy,

when the sun shines out your bum??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice.

A place in France.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A wonderful thing is a nose...

It grows and it grows and it grows...

It grows on your head,

Whilst youre lying in bed...

At the opposite end to your toes.

*Spine Millignam*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a famous seaside place called Blackpool,

That's noted for fresh air and fun,

And Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom

Went there with young Albert, their son.

A grand little lad was young Albert,

All dressed in his best; quite a swell

With a stick with an 'orse's 'ead 'andle,

The finest that Woolworth's could sell.

They didn't think much of the Ocean:

The waves, they were fiddlin' and small,

There was no wrecks and nobody drownded,

Fact, nothing to laugh at at all.

So, seeking for further amusement,

They paid and went into the Zoo,

Where they'd Lions and Tigers and Camels,

And old ale and sandwiches too.

There were one great big Lion called Wallace;

His nose were all covered with scars -

He lay in a somnolent posture,

With the side of his face on the bars.

Now Albert had heard about Lions,

How they was ferocious and wild -

To see Wallace lying so peaceful,

Well, it didn't seem right to the child.

So straightway the brave little feller,

Not showing a morsel of fear,

Took his stick with its 'orse's 'ead 'andle

And pushed it in Wallace's ear.

You could see that the Lion didn't like it,

For giving a kind of a roll,

He pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im,

And swallowed the little lad 'ole.

Then Pa, who had seen the occurrence,

And didn't know what to do next,

Said 'Mother! Yon Lion's 'et Albert',

And Mother said 'Well, I am vexed!'

Then Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom -

Quite rightly, when all's said and done -

Complained to the Animal Keeper,

That the Lion had eaten their son.

The keeper was quite nice about it;

He said 'What a nasty mishap.

Are you sure that it's your boy he's eaten?'

Pa said "Am I sure? There's his cap!'

The manager had to be sent for.

He came and he said 'What's to do?'

Pa said 'Yon Lion's 'et Albert,

'And 'im in his Sunday clothes, too.'

Then Mother said, 'Right's right, young feller;

I think it's a shame and a sin,

For a lion to go and eat Albert,

And after we've paid to come in.'

The manager wanted no trouble,

He took out his purse right away,

Saying 'How much to settle the matter?'

And Pa said "What do you usually pay?'

But Mother had turned a bit awkward

When she thought where her Albert had gone.

She said 'No! someone's got to be summonsed' -

So that was decided upon.

Then off they went to the P'lice Station,

In front of the Magistrate chap;

They told 'im what happened to Albert,

And proved it by showing his cap.

The Magistrate gave his opinion

That no one was really to blame

And he said that he hoped the Ramsbottoms

Would have further sons to their name.

At that Mother got proper blazing,

'And thank you, sir, kindly,' said she.

'What waste all our lives raising children

To feed ruddy Lions? Not me!'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

roses are red

violets are blue

i am a schizophrenic

and so am i

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Biscuits

They're nice

Especially nice biscuits they do a custard cream version now they are beyond nice they are amazing

Ooo yes someone brought a pack into work, couldn't stop helping myself, yummy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh, I wish I were a glow worm,

a glow worm’s never glum.

‘Cause how can you be grumpy,

when the sun shines out your bum??

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Old Chinese Proverb;

Man who walks through door side ways with an erection, is always going to Bangkok

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Theres a hell of a smell down in Dingley Dell... Coz the pixies are washin their socks...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The grand old Duke of York

He had ten thousand men,

And when he had the energy

He had them all again.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Georgey Porgey pudding and pie

Kissed the girls and made them cry...

When the boys came out to play

He kissed em too coz he's funny that way...

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

OK Euro, you've been too nice, Granny has sodded off lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's astounding

Time is fleeting

Madness takes its toll

But listen closely

Not for very much longer

I've got to keep control

I remember doing the Time Warp

Drinking those moments when

The blackness would hit me

And the void would be calling

Let's do the Time Warp again

It's just a jump to the left

And then a step to the right

With your hands on your hips

You bring your knees in tight

But it's the pelvic thrust

That really drives you insane

Let's do the Time Warp again

It's so dreamy

Oh, fantasy free me

So you can't see me

No, not at all

In another dimension

With voyeuristic intention

Well secluded, I see all

With a bit of a mind flip

You're into the time slip

And nothing can ever be the same

You're spaced out on sensation

Like you're under sedation

Let's do the Time Warp again

Well I was walking down the street

Just a having a think

When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink

He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise

He had a pick up truck and the devil's eyes

He stared at me and I felt a change

Time meant nothing, never would again

Let's do the Time Warp again

It's just a jump to the left

And then a step to the right

With your hands on your hips

You bring your knees in tight

But it's the pelvic thrust

That really drives you insane

Let's do the Time Warp again

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" it's the pelvic thrust

That really drives you insane

Let's do the Time Warp again

Let's do the Time Warp again"

The Frocky Horror Show...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,

Guess I'll go eat worms,

Long, thin, slimy ones; Short, fat, juicy ones,

Itsy, bitsy, fuzzy wuzzy worms.

Down goes the first one, down goes the second one,

Oh how they wiggle and squirm.

Up comes the first one, up comes the second one,

Oh how they wiggle and squirm.

I bite off the heads, and suck out the juice

And throw the skins away

Nobody knows how fat I grow

On worms three times a day

Ohh...nobody loves me.

Chomp off their heads and squeeze out the juice

And throw their tails away

Nobody knows how I survive

On worms three times a day

ong thin slimy ones slip down easily

Short fat fuzzy ones don't

Short fat fuzzy ones stick to your teeth

And the juice goes slurpin' (slurping noise) down your throat

Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,

think I'll go eat worms...

big fat juicy ones, little slimy skinny ones,

hope they don't have germs!

me too - you are not alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" it's the pelvic thrust

That really drives you insane

Let's do the Time Warp again

The Frocky Horror Show...

... you are such a gent

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" think I'll go eat worms...

big fat juicy ones, little slimy skinny ones,

hope they don't have germs!

me too - you are not alone

Awwww... Ya knows that aint true...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Things that in Bump in the night

Should not really give you a fright...

Its the hole in each ear

That lets in the fear...

That and the absence of light.

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I have to say; what a thoroughly nice thread.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have to say; what a thoroughly nice thread."

For a thoroughly nice lady...

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

"I have to say; what a thoroughly nice thread.

For a thoroughly nice lady...

She's OK. I wouldn't go that far though.

*runs, hides*

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"I have to say; what a thoroughly nice thread.

For a thoroughly nice lady...

She's OK. I wouldn't go that far though.

*runs, hides*"

Put ya tin hat on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think this is nice ... Taken from Eddie Vedder's brilliant soundtrack from Into the Wild...

On bended knee is no way to be free

Lifting up an empty cup, I ask silently

All my destinations will accept the one that's me

So I can breathe...

Circles they grow and they swallow people whole

Half their lives they say goodnight to wives they'll never know

A mind full of questions, and a teacher in my soul

And so it goes...

Don't come closer or I'll have to go

Holding me like gravity are places that pull

If ever there was someone to keep me at home

It would be you...

Everyone I come across, in cages they bought

They think of me and my wandering, but I'm never what they thought

I've got my indignation, but I'm pure in all my thoughts

I'm alive...

Wind in my hair, I feel part of everywhere

Underneath my being is a road that disappeared

Late at night I hear the trees, they're singing with the dead

Overhead...

Leave it to me as I find a way to be

Consider me a satellite, forever orbiting

I knew all the rules, but the rules did not know me

Guaranteed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have to say; what a thoroughly nice thread.

For a thoroughly nice lady...

She's OK. I wouldn't go that far though.

*runs, hides*"

Oi... Stop lowerin the tone mo pizzle...

This is Grannys "Nice" thread...

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

It was beautiful ...... thanks xx

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