FabSwingers.com forum: £10 million, and a snail part 2

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

If the snail can be haltered, I’m also going to make snail sized halters and reins and wee saddles to sell. Alongside my business model from the first thread.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If the snail can be haltered, I’m also going to make snail sized halters and reins and wee saddles to sell. Alongside my business model from the first thread."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does it move at the speed of a normal snail?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Does it move at the speed of a normal snail?"

Normal snail speed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does it move at the speed of a normal snail?

Normal snail speed "

Well in that case just move around a lot. Average snail takes 30 hours to do a mile. 100 miles is 4 months for him to catch up.

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By *Marvel-Man
over a year ago

In The Gym

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED."

I still stand by my post from the 1st thread for being the solution I'd use.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I still stand by my post from the 1st thread for being the solution I'd use."

But you have not said why nobody would find it?

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By *Marvel-Man
over a year ago

In The Gym

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I still stand by my post from the 1st thread for being the solution I'd use.

But you have not said why nobody would find it?"

OK here's a few things that could be done.

Put the snail in orbit around the earth with a random changing tragedies. Expensive but you're rich. Pretty much impossible to find the snail doing this.

Sink the snail to the bottom of the deepest part of the ocean (mariana trench). Not many people have been down there that I'm aware of. (Think more people have been to the moon.)

Have the snail constantly in transit. Like a high security vault on wheels kind of scenario. Unmarked but with guards and escort cars and so on. If it's constantly on the move it's pretty difficult to know where it's going to be. (Least favourite of my ideas due to people being corruptible)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d lead it through one of those airport escalators but up the wrong way.

The snail wouldn’t be intelligent enough to know to turn around once it’s on, it’d forever be stuck on the escalator

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I love how much thought people are putting into outwitting a snail.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can it be caught in a box? I'd keep the little fucker on me at all times, feed it, love it, care for it. Will be best mates before we know it and I'm 10 mill richer

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I love how much thought people are putting into outwitting a snail."

It’s a shame, because it’s a smart snail, and will outwit everyone.

It will always be chasing you, if you accept the money. Delaying it is just that; a delay

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can it be caught in a box? I'd keep the little fucker on me at all times, feed it, love it, care for it. Will be best mates before we know it and I'm 10 mill richer "

He will still find and touch you, and therefore kill you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/06/19 18:04:58]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"He wont have to find me, I'll be carrying him around with me, him in his little box, he will.have the life of luxury! Of course it has to be called Gary"

Yes but hes still going to escape the box and touch you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can it be caught in a box? I'd keep the little fucker on me at all times, feed it, love it, care for it. Will be best mates before we know it and I'm 10 mill richer

He will still find and touch you, and therefore kill you "

He wont have to find me, I'll be carrying him around with me, him in his little box, he will.have the life of luxury! Of course it has to be called Gary

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED."

Put it in a hamster ball so it can follow me but can't touch me

With £2 of salt always on me as a safety net

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Sigh ......

Open hamster ball.

Close hamster ball with snail inside.

The end.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"He wont have to find me, I'll be carrying him around with me, him in his little box, he will.have the life of luxury! Of course it has to be called Gary

Yes but hes still going to escape the box and touch you "

On that note... I'll stay 10 mill lighter, I dont need the paranoia of a snail chase in my life ??

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

Put it in a hamster ball so it can follow me but can't touch me

With £2 of salt always on me as a safety net"

ffs ! ffs ! FFS ! Fuck !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

Put it in a hamster ball so it can follow me but can't touch me

With £2 of salt always on me as a safety net"

I covered it in my previous thread, but salt won’t harm the snail. It will just give it cold like symptoms for a few days

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sigh ......

Open hamster ball.

Close hamster ball with snail inside.

The end. "

It’ll get out eventually

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

put the snail in a circular perspex tube.

Like a maze without exit.

Perpetuality. Infinity. Beyond.

I win.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Sigh ......

Open hamster ball.

Close hamster ball with snail inside.

The end.

It’ll get out eventually "

You are just making the rules up as you go along.

I'd die naturally before it got out

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sigh ......

Open hamster ball.

Close hamster ball with snail inside.

The end.

It’ll get out eventually

You are just making the rules up as you go along.

I'd die naturally before it got out"

Then it’s a happy ending for you and your £10 million

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Let it follow me into a French restaurant and through the kitchen

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Let it follow me into a French restaurant and through the kitchen"

Even if it gets eaten it won’t die. It’ll come out the other end and find you

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Let it follow me into a French restaurant and through the kitchen

Even if it gets eaten it won’t die. It’ll come out the other end and find you "

I think you're making this up as you go along

I'll take my hamster ball winnings please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty valuable snail inside the hamster wheel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it after the person or the money? Because you could give/plant the money on someone else.

And is it a one time killer?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is it after the person or the money? Because you could give/plant the money on someone else.

And is it a one time killer? "

When you take the money the snail will be there. He will touch you once, to mark you as his own, and then you get a head start before he sets off

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Pretty valuable snail inside the hamster wheel."

It’ll get out

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

Nah I'll not bother

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

"Does it move at the speed of a normal snail?

Normal snail speed "

Fine, I'll use the money to get a house on an island as far away from any other land as I can find. Or, stay on a luxury liner forever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One thing I've noticed is people seem intent on trying to kill snail even though it can't be harmed and is relentlessly moving toward target.

Shows people aren't very good at details.

Clearly no ordinary snail from nature so I guess you should have said that OP to give it more plainly. Maybe called it an invincible snail or something in the title...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"One thing I've noticed is people seem intent on trying to kill snail even though it can't be harmed and is relentlessly moving toward target.

Shows people aren't very good at details.

Clearly no ordinary snail from nature so I guess you should have said that OP to give it more plainly. Maybe called it an invincible snail or something in the title..."

Or they can learn to read the OP

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

I'd ask for the money to be given to me in Sydney Australia, that would take him 36 and a half years to travel at snail speed. A months holibobs in Oz every year would add 6 years to that, making me 94 years old.... I think by then I'd be broke and ready for him to kill me lol!

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Is anybody going to help the snail? If not then I'll take the money. I reckon I can evade a snail. I can just move abroad or even go to the Isle of Wight. I can also pay snail-spotters.

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

Can you not place a plant pot(without hole in bottom) over the snail....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can you not place a plant pot(without hole in bottom) over the snail.... "

It will escape

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Is anybody going to help the snail? If not then I'll take the money. I reckon I can evade a snail. I can just move abroad or even go to the Isle of Wight. I can also pay snail-spotters. "

No, nobody is helping the snail

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Ten mill please..I'm going shopping who wants something nice?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a slug killed a japanese railway

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By *ORDERMANMan
over a year ago

wrexham

"Can you not place a plant pot(without hole in bottom) over the snail....

It will escape "

Interested how...

Can it tunnel itself out..

Does it gnaw through the plastic

Does it gnaw through clay...

That is depending which type of plant pot

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can you not place a plant pot(without hole in bottom) over the snail....

It will escape

Interested how...

Can it tunnel itself out..

Does it gnaw through the plastic

Does it gnaw through clay...

That is depending which type of plant pot"

It will find a way

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By *_RiderMan
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

I'll have the £10 million, find the snail, encircle it with a ton of salt then fly off to Thailand. Not before getting someone to stick a GPS location device to its shell. That should buy me some time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One thing I've noticed is people seem intent on trying to kill snail even though it can't be harmed and is relentlessly moving toward target.

Shows people aren't very good at details.

Clearly no ordinary snail from nature so I guess you should have said that OP to give it more plainly. Maybe called it an invincible snail or something in the title...

Or they can learn to read the OP"

Some do some don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surround it with a large copper ring , snails and slugs can't cross copper . It makes them all giddy

I would also feed it regularly call it Daren and pet it wearing rubber gloves .

I think we would become great pals and have many adventures .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"One thing I've noticed is people seem intent on trying to kill snail even though it can't be harmed and is relentlessly moving toward target.

Shows people aren't very good at details.

Clearly no ordinary snail from nature so I guess you should have said that OP to give it more plainly. Maybe called it an invincible snail or something in the title...

Or they can learn to read the OP

Some do some don't "

Some will some won’t

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Surround it with a large copper ring , snails and slugs can't cross copper . It makes them all giddy

I would also feed it regularly call it Daren and pet it wearing rubber gloves .

I think we would become great pals and have many adventures .

You’re still touching it, even if you’re wearing rubber gloves. Therefore you’d die instantly

And it’ll find a way out of the copper ring

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel bad for the snail. It has a job and people are trying to kill it. I'd throw it some cheese and make friends, from far enough away that it can't take a jump at me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One thing I've noticed is people seem intent on trying to kill snail even though it can't be harmed and is relentlessly moving toward target.

Shows people aren't very good at details.

Clearly no ordinary snail from nature so I guess you should have said that OP to give it more plainly. Maybe called it an invincible snail or something in the title...

Or they can learn to read the OP

Some do some don't

Some will some won’t "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I feel bad for the snail. It has a job and people are trying to kill it. I'd throw it some cheese and make friends, from far enough away that it can't take a jump at me. "

Always the good soul

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By *_RiderMan
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Get someone else to put it in a copper pot, fill it with salt then solder the pot shut. The put the copper pot in a bigger one and repeat. That little bastard isn't getting near me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Get someone else to put it in a copper pot, fill it with salt then solder the pot shut. The put the copper pot in a bigger one and repeat. That little bastard isn't getting near me. "

He will ALWAYS find a way out

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By *_RiderMan
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Get someone else to put it in a copper pot, fill it with salt then solder the pot shut. The put the copper pot in a bigger one and repeat. That little bastard isn't getting near me.

He will ALWAYS find a way out "

Yeah but by the time it does I'm long gone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Surround it with a large copper ring , snails and slugs can't cross copper . It makes them all giddy

I would also feed it regularly call it Daren and pet it wearing rubber gloves .

I think we would become great pals and have many adventures .

You’re still touching it, even if you’re wearing rubber gloves. Therefore you’d die instantly

And it’ll find a way out of the copper ring"

Well in that case no thanks to the money and hello my new pal Daren.

Oh what larks we shall have , we will always be skint but happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd ask for the money to be given to me in Sydney Australia, that would take him 36 and a half years to travel at snail speed. A months holibobs in Oz every year would add 6 years to that, making me 94 years old.... I think by then I'd be broke and ready for him to kill me lol!

But you re assuming that the snail has to follow your every step rather than just track you down.

So you go to Oz for a month. He sets off to find you. A month in you come home. All he needs to do then is turn around, so in fact he'd only be a month behind you, not 6 years

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"Is anybody going to help the snail? If not then I'll take the money. I reckon I can evade a snail. I can just move abroad or even go to the Isle of Wight. I can also pay snail-spotters.

No, nobody is helping the snail "

Does the snail know how to use public transport?

Do I know where the snail is or is he going to try and sneak up on me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course and then I'll put a ring of salt around it and then it's doomed.

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By *019ReadyCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

I'm still traumatised from the last thread about this goddamn snail

*rocks in corner sucking thumb*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm still traumatised from the last thread about this goddamn snail

*rocks in corner sucking thumb*"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im still for taking the money.

The average speed of a snail is 25 metres an hour.

At that speed I think I'm safe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Im still for taking the money.

The average speed of a snail is 25 metres an hour.

At that speed I think I'm safe"

Sorry that should be 25 metres a day,not an hour

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

But you re assuming that the snail has to follow your every step rather than just track you down.

So you go to Oz for a month. He sets off to find you. A month in you come home. All he needs to do then is turn around, so in fact he'd only be a month behind you, not 6 years"

No.

I accept the money and initial contact with Brian (the snail) in Oz.

I fly home.

11 months later, I go to Oz for a month, so he's travelled 11 months towards the Uk, and when I'm in Oz on hols he travels a month back towards Oz, in effect meaning he's only 10 months away from Oz when I fly home, meaning he has to travel that month again Uk-wards before making any progress.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The other possibility people seem to forget is that it could get on a mode of transportation to wherever you were. It might be slow but nothing stopping it jumping on a boat/plane/car etc. That's stationary. If that car say goes past the house you're in sleeping at night you're fucked, across the drive up the stairs and in your bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

......................................... the snail is nearly here...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Living in a helium filled airship would bugger it somewhat.

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By *onkyLemonsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I genuinely don’t see the problem.

You accept £10 million. You can live your life to the fullest, achieve what you want to achieve, set up your loved ones and children etc.

Then - as the snail can be slowed / halted - you can have full control and influence over when its time for you to move on to greener pastures.

Once you’ve ticked off everything on your bucket list, go touch the snail yourself and let it be done.

Conversely, right now you live life every day. Some of us are struggling to make ends meet. Living in uncertainty of whether Brexit, or whatever the next socio-economic crisis may be, will cripple us financially.

You could be hit by a bus tomorrow, suffer I’ll health, and go way before your time. And all you’ll have been doing (potentially) is struggling along.

It’s like two gifts in one. A relatively worry free life and the power of choice (as in when it’s your time to go) - Id snap your hands off and get my running shoes on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can you use the money to place a tracker on the snail if someone else can touch it?

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I was thinking about this thread the other day!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was thinking about this thread the other day!

Good

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"......................................... the snail is nearly here..."

He’s coming for you all

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

What kind of snail? They move at different speeds

But essentially yes. Based on the natural state of how snails work (unstoppable not included) there is no way that a snail would ever be able to get close enough to touch you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was thinking about this thread the other day!

I think about this thread every time I see a snail.

I always wonder "is that *the* snail?"

And then I run.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was thinking about this thread the other day!

I think about this thread every time I see a snail.

I always wonder "is that *the* snail?"

And then I run."

Good choice. Always better to be safe than sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't need money. So no deal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Freeze it, easy

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By *hilledout-coupleCouple
over a year ago

telford

Put it in a Hamster ball and put the ball on water

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Gonna repeat; no matter what you do, it will find a way to get out or whatever, and hunt you down

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I still stand by my post from the 1st thread for being the solution I'd use.

But you have not said why nobody would find it?

OK here's a few things that could be done.

Put the snail in orbit around the earth with a random changing tragedies. Expensive but you're rich. Pretty much impossible to find the snail doing this.

Sink the snail to the bottom of the deepest part of the ocean (mariana trench). Not many people have been down there that I'm aware of. (Think more people have been to the moon.)

Much cheaper to get a bird to eat it & then keep said bird in a cage. Snail can't die so it'll stay alive but stuck in the bird & therefore can't touch you.

Or you could just get it in a container of beer & sling it in the freezer

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

Of course, one other option is to spend the money as soon as possible to help improve the lives of as many people as possible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a snail, just put the thing in a locked box and throw it down the mariana trench

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its a snail, just put the thing in a locked box and throw it down the mariana trench"

If its a snail..it came across this thread and thinks in 2050 it'll be relevant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been in a similar position like this before and found myself with a same style predicament and using past knowledge I would 100% take the cash

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a brilliant metaphor for life - Death is inevitablE. It is what you do before the snail catches up to you that matters.

I’d take the money, do good things with the money and embrace the snail when it arrives.

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By *Man1263Man
over a year ago

Stockport

Still going with my zombie parasite.

I may not be able to stop the snail (so it will escape orbit, a box, pressure from being thousands of feet of water) but if being controlled by something else......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a brilliant metaphor for life - Death is inevitablE. It is what you do before the snail catches up to you that matters.

I’d take the money, do good things with the money and embrace the snail when it arrives."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the money, get a jet to half away around the world. It will take the snail a life time to get to you at snail speed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What a brilliant metaphor for life - Death is inevitablE. It is what you do before the snail catches up to you that matters.

I’d take the money, do good things with the money and embrace the snail when it arrives."

You’re a good soul

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve been in a similar position like this before and found myself with a same style predicament and using past knowledge I would 100% take the cash "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’m bumping this again.

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the money.

No one is meant to live forever and I would feel so badass if I was on the run from a nemesis

I would just sleep in a circle of salt and be vigilant

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

Depends how long it would take to find me..if it was like 20 yrs then yes

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

"Take the money.

No one is meant to live forever and I would feel so badass if I was on the run from a nemesis

I would just sleep in a circle of salt and be vigilant "
even better

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston

I would not take the money.

CBA with the snail.

Little shit

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

Can’t you read

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends how long it would take to find me..if it was like 20 yrs then yes"

Well snails are pretty slow

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would not take the money.

CBA with the snail.

Little shit"

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

"10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

Can’t you read"
yes , you never said about it getting locked up in a cage it still moves about in a cage !!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

Can’t you read yes , you never said about it getting locked up in a cage it still moves about in a cage !!! "

‘ YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.’

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

"10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

Can’t you read yes , you never said about it getting locked up in a cage it still moves about in a cage !!!

‘ YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.’"

Ok , wish I'd never bothered commenting at all !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"10 mill , snail goes In a cage , job done

Can’t you read yes , you never said about it getting locked up in a cage it still moves about in a cage !!!

‘ YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.’

Ok , wish I'd never bothered commenting at all !!!! "

What? Why?! That’s in my original OP!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will take the Money assuming there is equal chance of death and survival.

I.e. the snail could kill me the next second alternatively I could delay it killing me for the next 60 years.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have two tanks of african snails and one tank of bugs and garden snails formy littlun.....i would allow it to move into the tanks, feed it, befreind it and whenever we move house, take him cedric with us(his new name),

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the money, put it in trust, live off the interest.

Choose when I want to die, sounds good because few people get that option.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED."

A snail can be trapped

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

What is the snail's motivation?

And how will it kill me?

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

Just hire someone to stalk the snail so they could warn you when it gets close, then they could keep taking it to the other side of the world or you could keep moving on, just maintaining distance between you until you're ready to go gentle into that good night or the snail dies (what's the life expectancy of a snail anyway? Few years?).

Problem solved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What is the snail's motivation?

And how will it kill me?

No self respecting snail would get out of bed if it wasn't for the £10mil.

The snail kills by touching.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

My crack team of snail commandos will alert and protect me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What is the snail's motivation?

And how will it kill me?

It’s only purpose in life is to kill you

And as soon as it touches you, you die

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

A snail can be trapped

Aye but it’ll get out

How you gonna trap the snail without touching it? You’ll dir

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By *DreamOfGenieWoman
over a year ago

London

I dreamt about this last night!

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"I dreamt about this last night!"

Ha ha ha

Was it scary?

I'll be honest it sounds awful. You'd never sleep!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put the snail on a social distancing lead always 2 metres away or more if the lead is longer

(Hopefully)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Put the snail on a social distancing lead always 2 metres away or more if the lead is longer

(Hopefully)

How are you getting the lead on the snail?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I dreamt about this last night!"

What happened?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Put the snail on a social distancing lead always 2 metres away or more if the lead is longer

(Hopefully)

How are you getting the lead on the snail?"

I had my trusty butler do it for me

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED."

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?"

You don’t know where the snail is.

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By *lint-EverhardMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

Yep, I'm in.

So when you get tired of life to or terminal cancer just let him catch you and it's good night Vienna.

Althoughout life you can have people telling you where the snake is.

"Hey Phil, how's it going"?

"Good thanks, we're (me and the snail) in Manchester walking down the high street. You"?

"Oh, I'm on my yacht in the Caribbean. I'll send someone to watch the snail tomorrow and you can join me if you want"?

"Yeah, that'll be great. I'm sick of watching this snail".

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

You don’t know where the snail is. "

Yes I do

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

You don’t know where the snail is.

Yes I do "

You have not said invisible snail

You said the snail kills when touched

You said snail travels at snalil pace

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Put the snail on a social distancing lead always 2 metres away or more if the lead is longer

(Hopefully)

How are you getting the lead on the snail?"

Snail Lasso obviously

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

You don’t know where the snail is.

Yes I do

You have not said invisible snail

You said the snail kills when touched

You said snail travels at snalil pace"

Yep. But how do you know where the snail is at all times?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the ten million get someone else to pick the snail up put in a locked tank post it the other side of the world and live my days in luxury if one day it does escape and catch me I would have spent the ten million and have lived a very indulgent life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Put the snail on a social distancing lead always 2 metres away or more if the lead is longer

(Hopefully)

How are you getting the lead on the snail?

Snail Lasso obviously

Oh you are good

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Take the ten million get someone else to pick the snail up put in a locked tank post it the other side of the world and live my days in luxury if one day it does escape and catch me I would have spent the ten million and have lived a very indulgent life"

That’s the spirit

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

A snail can be trapped

Aye but it’ll get out

How you gonna trap the snail without touching it? You’ll dir"

10 million can afford me a cast iron box I could coax it into. Then i'd bury it in the middle of nowhere and throw away the key

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

You don’t know where the snail is.

Yes I do

You have not said invisible snail

You said the snail kills when touched

You said snail travels at snalil pace

Yep. But how do you know where the snail is at all times? "

Simple

Stay in one place till Brian shows up then move

Knowing Brian is travelling towards me at 1m per hr will mean I always know where he is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I say give me the money and bring it on! Won't be the first run in I've had with a snail.

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I cannot see the problem

The premise tells us we cannot EVER stay in one place for more than 4months

Thus owning property around the world and moving every 3 adheres to the rules

Obviously one day one will not want to move and seriously that day the snail could have me

The snail knows where I am I know where the snail is and I get to travel the world

What am I losing exactly?

You don’t know where the snail is.

Yes I do

You have not said invisible snail

You said the snail kills when touched

You said snail travels at snalil pace

Yep. But how do you know where the snail is at all times?

Simple

Stay in one place till Brian shows up then move

Knowing Brian is travelling towards me at 1m per hr will mean I always know where he is

Of course the location method I'd use is sailing round the UK for a year

After a year I know Brian is on mainland UK

I travel 4 months away and will always know what trajectory he is on and how far away

After 3 months I move to home 2 on the same line

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I say give me the money and bring it on! Won't be the first run in I've had with a snail.

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

"Let it follow me into a French restaurant and through the kitchen

Even if it gets eaten it won’t die. It’ll come out the other end and find you "

And it will probably be angry too! - 'make it even more determined to kill you.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here"

Why are you confused?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Let it follow me into a French restaurant and through the kitchen

Even if it gets eaten it won’t die. It’ll come out the other end and find you

And it will probably be angry too! - 'make it even more determined to kill you."

Exactly.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here

Why are you confused?"

Killer... snail?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here

Why are you confused?

Killer... snail? "

What about it has you confused?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here

Why are you confused?

Killer... snail?

What about it has you confused?"

My brain just went to blue screen of death

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

Tbh I'd be more concerned about the humans who might be after me to get the money. If they were to join forces with the snail to track me then the snail would catch up with me sooner with the humans carrying it and using it as a direction finder.

Still I'd take the money and put it in trust for the family keeping a little back to pay for a tombstone inscribed with the legend "died from the touch of a vengeant snail"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tbh I'd be more concerned about the humans who might be after me to get the money. If they were to join forces with the snail to track me then the snail would catch up with me sooner with the humans carrying it and using it as a direction finder.

Still I'd take the money and put it in trust for the family keeping a little back to pay for a tombstone inscribed with the legend "died from the touch of a vengeant snail""

I like your thinking

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Insert confused puppy head tilt gif here

Why are you confused?

Killer... snail?

What about it has you confused?

My brain just went to blue screen of death

It’s an easy concept

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never been the fastest over the ground but I'm pretty sure I can outpace a snail for the rest of my life..... I accept cash or cheque

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've never been the fastest over the ground but I'm pretty sure I can outpace a snail for the rest of my life..... I accept cash or cheque

Let’s hope you can

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, you'd never sleep for worrying about that damm snail

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By *ill-Ian KissesCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere over there

"I'll have the £10 million, find the snail, encircle it with a ton of salt then fly off to Thailand. Not before getting someone to stick a GPS location device to its shell. That should buy me some time."

This thread reminding me of a book I spent one summer reading as a kid called ‘Pilgrim Snail’ by Ben Nimmo where he puts wee dots that he can track them.

Millie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've never been the fastest over the ground but I'm pretty sure I can outpace a snail for the rest of my life..... I accept cash or cheque

Let’s hope you can"

I'm willing to take that chance.

Is there a small fee required for setting up the account to pay the money into by any chance?

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By *hewifeandiCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

I'd stick it in a jam jar taped up and carry it with me. That way I know where the slimey little bugger is at all times lol

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED.

I still stand by my post from the 1st thread for being the solution I'd use.

But you have not said why nobody would find it?

OK here's a few things that could be done.

Put the snail in orbit around the earth with a random changing tragedies. Expensive but you're rich. Pretty much impossible to find the snail doing this.

Sink the snail to the bottom of the deepest part of the ocean (mariana trench). Not many people have been down there that I'm aware of. (Think more people have been to the moon.)

Or... just stick a glass over it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"£10 million, cash in hand, right now. But there’s a catch;

- A snail is chasing you, and will be for the rest of your life. If it touches you, you die instantly.

- The snail cannot be killed.

- It knows your location at all times.

- It’s only purpose is to find you.

Are you taking the money?

Update;

PEOPLE THE SNAIL WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU

YOU MAY TEMPORARILY HALTER IT, BUT IT WILL FIND YOU.

IT CANNOT BE KILLED. ITS ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO FIND AND TOUCH YOU. IT CANNOT BE BRIBED OR STOPPED."

We all die at some point. Snail eating humans or not.

You may even due before the pesky snail gets its two tentacles on you. Their sense of direction is governed by then, cut them off and they loose all sense of direction. It may still find you.

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

I’ll buy him a lovely tank with full of entertainment and food in it but secure to not let him get out. I’ll take him with me wherever I go so he will think he can kill me anytime he wishes.

Then I will find him a sexy wife to enjoy when bored on its own. After, here comes babies. He will be too tired to do anything else after that.

I will open the sink when I’m old and become useless for life. He will raise and kill me.

Happy Ending

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I keep thinking about this snail

My baba watches a baby TV program about a cartoon snail who interviews other animals

And he goes all over the world to do so

And me and C keep wondering how he gets from place to place

Just like the snail in my OP. Except I don’t think the cartoon snail kills you. Maybe it does

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I keep thinking about this snail

My baba watches a baby TV program about a cartoon snail who interviews other animals

And he goes all over the world to do so

And me and C keep wondering how he gets from place to place

Just like the snail in my OP. Except I don’t think the cartoon snail kills you. Maybe it does"

Ah yes "Killer Snail" the CBeebies version lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah; let’s do it!

(Moves to a salt marsh)

I’ll wait

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I keep thinking about this snail

My baba watches a baby TV program about a cartoon snail who interviews other animals

And he goes all over the world to do so

And me and C keep wondering how he gets from place to place

Just like the snail in my OP. Except I don’t think the cartoon snail kills you. Maybe it does"

Surely an important snail would have his own jet

Slime-air?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I keep thinking about this snail

My baba watches a baby TV program about a cartoon snail who interviews other animals

And he goes all over the world to do so

And me and C keep wondering how he gets from place to place

Just like the snail in my OP. Except I don’t think the cartoon snail kills you. Maybe it does

Surely an important snail would have his own jet

Slime-air?"

Gets his jet fuel from shell

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