FabSwingers.com forum: Animal vs Human

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As before.. For Reputation points.

What is the hardest/toughest/fiercest animal you think you could take down in an unarmed deathmatch?

Battle Arena being a football field. If aquatic or sub-aquatic an Olympic sized pool.

Fiiiiight!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

I can’t even beat my little dog so I don’t stand a chance!!! Maybe a goldfish?

J x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

I think I could take on a goldfish that's not been fed for 3 days

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cat and he's got no teeth

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I can’t even beat my little dog so I don’t stand a chance!!! Maybe a goldfish?

J x"

You'd have to catch it. Or wait for it to die of old age. It's in a pool FFS and you've no net

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think I could take on a goldfish that's not been fed for 3 days"

No.. all animals in this thread are in their prime. Till you murder them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My cat and he's got no teeth"

You could kill your own cat? Duuude.. that's cold.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A mouse

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

I'd arm wrestle an aardvark

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A Golden Marmoset. Fluffy little Trump look-a-likey bastards

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I could take out a fairly substantial Goose I reckon. I would cry while doing it though.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I forgot to mention.. the animal knows the score and is psyched up for the fight.. Youd be facing a mouse tgats up for it.

Also those who said goldfish wouldn't have to catch it.. it'd come to them.. to the sound of some very tiny Cellos

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'd arm wrestle an aardvark "

No.. it's to the death

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A Golden Marmoset. Fluffy little Trump look-a-likey bastards

Lmfao!

You'll get bit by the rotten little doppelganger.. but I think you'll win.. you've got him mentally beaten with your sass

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I could take out a fairly substantial Goose I reckon. I would cry while doing it though. "

I expect all of us will have tears or adrenaline, rage, fear, sorrow and guilt as we throttle our chosen creatures.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

D."

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?"

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

An adult doe.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

D."

You're dead

It's going to catch your leg on the first kick grab hold of your thigh with all its claws grab your shins with its back claws and use your leg as a climbing frame up to your face.

You have a murderous Lynx that's attached itself to your leg and he's moving quick. You've not got a shot in.. What s your plan?

Have you seen them hunt? They're very agile you know? About the size of a medium Dog.

I like your photos.. please reconsider this.. For Fabs sake. I've already lost someone to a hippo, a Hyena and two kangaroos. Possibly an Anaconda.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"An adult doe.

Ok.. let's hear the plan. I think youre capable.. I just need the proof I want to hear. How are you going to fuck up this doey eyed muthafucka?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

"An adult doe.

Ok.. let's hear the plan. I think youre capable.. I just need the proof I want to hear. How are you going to fuck up this doey eyed muthafucka?"

Both arms around the doe’s neck approaching from the same side, in a lunge move, whilst kicking out its legs to destabilise it. This will allow me to floor it with me lying over it (whole body on top to pin it) and when I’ve squared myself to ensure it’s trapped under my weight and immovable then it’s taking the head low to the ground and wrenching purposefully and with force its neck round till it breaks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

You're dead

It's going to catch your leg on the first kick grab hold of your thigh with all its claws grab your shins with its back claws and use your leg as a climbing frame up to your face.

You have a murderous Lynx that's attached itself to your leg and he's moving quick. You've not got a shot in.. What s your plan?

Have you seen them hunt? They're very agile you know? About the size of a medium Dog.

I like your photos.. please reconsider this.. For Fabs sake. I've already lost someone to a hippo, a Hyena and two kangaroos. Possibly an Anaconda."

lmao thanks for your concern! Ye I’ve checked them out (not eye to eye of course) but I’m still confident

I will be like Daniel-san! Leg ready, the Lynx pounces, thrust kick, run and Jonny Wilkinson volley, then when it’s stunned I will run in and get evil!

if it’s got my leg I’m ripping it’s eyes out!

I feel sad saying it, I’m an animal lover, but I’ve got 4 kids to feed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"An adult doe.

Ok.. let's hear the plan. I think youre capable.. I just need the proof I want to hear. How are you going to fuck up this doey eyed muthafucka?

RESPECT!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

You're dead

It's going to catch your leg on the first kick grab hold of your thigh with all its claws grab your shins with its back claws and use your leg as a climbing frame up to your face.

You have a murderous Lynx that's attached itself to your leg and he's moving quick. You've not got a shot in.. What s your plan?

Have you seen them hunt? They're very agile you know? About the size of a medium Dog.

I like your photos.. please reconsider this.. For Fabs sake. I've already lost someone to a hippo, a Hyena and two kangaroos. Possibly an Anaconda.

lmao thanks for your concern! Ye I’ve checked them out (not eye to eye of course) but I’m still confident

I will be like Daniel-san! Leg ready, the Lynx pounces, thrust kick, run and Jonny Wilkinson volley, then when it’s stunned I will run in and get evil!

if it’s got my leg I’m ripping it’s eyes out!

I feel sad saying it, I’m an animal lover, but I’ve got 4 kids to feed

D."

Same.. nobody wants to do this. The animals started it.

Ok.. I'll give you the lynx.. but it'll be close and you'll end up in A&E

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

You're dead

It's going to catch your leg on the first kick grab hold of your thigh with all its claws grab your shins with its back claws and use your leg as a climbing frame up to your face.

You have a murderous Lynx that's attached itself to your leg and he's moving quick. You've not got a shot in.. What s your plan?

Have you seen them hunt? They're very agile you know? About the size of a medium Dog.

I like your photos.. please reconsider this.. For Fabs sake. I've already lost someone to a hippo, a Hyena and two kangaroos. Possibly an Anaconda.

lmao thanks for your concern! Ye I’ve checked them out (not eye to eye of course) but I’m still confident

I will be like Daniel-san! Leg ready, the Lynx pounces, thrust kick, run and Jonny Wilkinson volley, then when it’s stunned I will run in and get evil!

if it’s got my leg I’m ripping it’s eyes out!

I feel sad saying it, I’m an animal lover, but I’ve got 4 kids to feed

Same.. nobody wants to do this. The animals started it.

Ok.. I'll give you the lynx.. but it'll be close and you'll end up in A&E

I will take us both going down

as long as my kids are safe

how many points?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?

I’m thinking defensive thrust kicks until I can run in and volley it

the claws need to be kept away from my body

You're dead

It's going to catch your leg on the first kick grab hold of your thigh with all its claws grab your shins with its back claws and use your leg as a climbing frame up to your face.

You have a murderous Lynx that's attached itself to your leg and he's moving quick. You've not got a shot in.. What s your plan?

Have you seen them hunt? They're very agile you know? About the size of a medium Dog.

I like your photos.. please reconsider this.. For Fabs sake. I've already lost someone to a hippo, a Hyena and two kangaroos. Possibly an Anaconda.

lmao thanks for your concern! Ye I’ve checked them out (not eye to eye of course) but I’m still confident

I will be like Daniel-san! Leg ready, the Lynx pounces, thrust kick, run and Jonny Wilkinson volley, then when it’s stunned I will run in and get evil!

if it’s got my leg I’m ripping it’s eyes out!

I feel sad saying it, I’m an animal lover, but I’ve got 4 kids to feed

Same.. nobody wants to do this. The animals started it.

Ok.. I'll give you the lynx.. but it'll be close and you'll end up in A&E

I will take us both going down

as long as my kids are safe

how many points?

D."

Lots.. up there with Rattlesnake and Wolf brigade.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

"An adult doe.

Ok.. let's hear the plan. I think youre capable.. I just need the proof I want to hear. How are you going to fuck up this doey eyed muthafucka?

RESPECT!

I got skillz.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A donkey.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A kick could break your leg

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"A kick could break your leg"
Yeah but you would help me again wouldn't you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A swan but I'd have to be careful, they can break your arm know.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A kick could break your legYeah but you would help me again wouldn't you

Why do I keep getting dragged into your fights?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A swan but I'd have to be careful, they can break your arm know."

I reckon they're all talk.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

2 hippos

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is the kind of question Jay from The Inbetweeners would come out with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

I kill critters for a living.....soooooooo I'll bow out if this one....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"2 hippos

I won't allow it. You can take on two animals.. but there must be another person to fight alongside.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is the kind of question Jay from The Inbetweeners would come out with"

I'm honoured.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I kill critters for a living.....soooooooo I'll bow out if this one....

No pros.. this is purely amateur animal murder. I admire your sense of honour to bow out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uzukiNo1Woman
over a year ago

Rhyl

"I kill critters for a living.....soooooooo I'll bow out if this one....

No pros.. this is purely amateur animal murder. I admire your sense of honour to bow out."

Any advice needed just ask

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"I’m gunna go for a Lynx, they are pretty tough but I reckon I could take it

A lynx! Fooking Ell! ONE hiss and I'd be off.. much rather face a dog's bite than four sets of cat claws and teeth. A Lynx swipe could open up a few arteries! It's mad as fuck too..

What's your plan?"

Spray it in the eyes with a can of Lynx to blind it first

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"2 hippos

I won't allow it. You can take on two animals.. but there must be another person to fight alongside."
i have a trap stand between the hippos make the attack from each side last sec dive out thr way just as there gonna bite and then watch them kill eachother before i pick off the potential winner

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"2 hippos

I won't allow it. You can take on two animals.. but there must be another person to fight alongside.i have a trap stand between the hippos make the attack from each side last sec dive out thr way just as there gonna bite and then watch them kill eachother before i pick off the potential winner

Ghengis Khan will not televise this fight

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"A kick could break your legYeah but you would help me again wouldn't you

Why do I keep getting dragged into your fights?

"
I can manage myself you can be there just as backup.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A kick could break your legYeah but you would help me again wouldn't you

Why do I keep getting dragged into your fights?

I can manage myself you can be there just as backup."

No.. No I can't.. I like you and I don't want you to get hurt.. So why not pick a Puffin or something and be done with it

You don't see me jumping in to protect the Hippo fiend do you? It wouldn't be.. honourable.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A kick could break your legYeah but you would help me again wouldn't you

Why do I keep getting dragged into your fights?

I can manage myself you can be there just as backup."

I can be your cheerleader

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But if that Donkey goes for your jugular.. my hands are tied

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ocodoughnutgirlWoman
over a year ago

Sea of jelly and doughnuts

I'm sticking with my first choice Mongoose....

Swift kick to the face, then I'll jump on it Bruce Lee style!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm sticking with my first choice Mongoose....

Swift kick to the face, then I'll jump on it Bruce Lee style!

Just make sure it's dead before you relax you're guard. Tough little bastards. You have my respect.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ocodoughnutgirlWoman
over a year ago

Sea of jelly and doughnuts

"I'm sticking with my first choice Mongoose....

Swift kick to the face, then I'll jump on it Bruce Lee style!

Just make sure it's dead before you relax you're guard. Tough little bastards. You have my respect."

Squeeze it between my thighs, then a swift twist to the neck should make sure its dead

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm sticking with my first choice Mongoose....

Swift kick to the face, then I'll jump on it Bruce Lee style!

Just make sure it's dead before you relax you're guard. Tough little bastards. You have my respect.

Squeeze it between my thighs, then a swift twist to the neck should make sure its dead

You'll get some private messages off the back of that comment

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ocodoughnutgirlWoman
over a year ago

Sea of jelly and doughnuts

"I'm sticking with my first choice Mongoose....

Swift kick to the face, then I'll jump on it Bruce Lee style!

Just make sure it's dead before you relax you're guard. Tough little bastards. You have my respect.

Squeeze it between my thighs, then a swift twist to the neck should make sure its dead

You'll get some private messages off the back of that comment

Note to self: don't type what pops into ones head

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A dodo.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

city

Tortoise. I love them, but I'd kill one if it attacked me. I'd show no mercy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A dodo."

Ok.. but it's alive. I've found one. You're on your own.. go for it!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tortoise. I love them, but I'd kill one if it attacked me. I'd show no mercy. "

Don't kick it!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I genuinely got attacked by a meant to be tame llama and my hubby just laughed and tried to film it before he realiSed it was actually trying to hurt me and had to pull it off

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I genuinely got attacked by a meant to be tame llama and my hubby just laughed and tried to film it before he realiSed it was actually trying to hurt me and had to pull it off"
and have the pics to prove it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A cobra

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I genuinely got attacked by a meant to be tame llama and my hubby just laughed and tried to film it before he realiSed it was actually trying to hurt me and had to pull it off and have the pics to prove it "

You need to share lololol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A cobra

FFS! Definately not helping

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

How about a fox.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about a fox."

Sounds reasonable.. though.. given your form so far.. you're probably thinking desert fox SAS guy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"How about a fox.

Sounds reasonable.. though.. given your form so far.. you're probably thinking desert fox SAS guy"
no not Jason.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"How about a fox.

Sounds reasonable.. though.. given your form so far.. you're probably thinking desert fox SAS guy"
given my form so far what do you mean

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

battle arena...Great white shark

Aquatic... Honey badger

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"I genuinely got attacked by a meant to be tame llama and my hubby just laughed and tried to film it before he realiSed it was actually trying to hurt me and had to pull it off"

Sounds allama-ing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A centipede....they're the only thing I would fight.

I love animals too much, I'd just let them shred me rather than hurt one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How about a fox.

Sounds reasonable.. though.. given your form so far.. you're probably thinking desert fox SAS guygiven my form so far what do you mean

You keep signing your own death warrant then asking me to join in as backup!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"battle arena...Great white shark

Aquatic... Honey badger"

Playful Sam may he rest in pieces

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"How about a fox.

Sounds reasonable.. though.. given your form so far.. you're probably thinking desert fox SAS guygiven my form so far what do you mean

You keep signing your own death warrant then asking me to join in as backup!"

Well fighting animals can be difficult at times

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ibblingnewtWoman
over a year ago

by the sea

I’ve battled my demons before

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve battled my demons before "

Which are? Animally speaking.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was a mouse yesterday, today I want to be a gerbil

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ibblingnewtWoman
over a year ago

by the sea

"I’ve battled my demons before

Which are? Animally speaking."

They were scary monsters with animalistic features, I felt I was fighting a mix of American werewolf in London and a evil hellboy

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve battled my demons before

Which are? Animally speaking.

They were scary monsters with animalistic features, I felt I was fighting a mix of American werewolf in London and a evil hellboy"

that sounds hardcore

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread