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Do you agree: Sex on first date is 'IMPORTANT if you want a serious relationship'

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By *aptain V OP   Man
over a year ago

Birstall, Leicester

What are your thoughts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think someone is looking for you OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, no. If I'm building a serious relationship with someone then I'd think long and hard before sleeping with someone on a first date

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Disagree. I don't believe in blanket rules but I'd rather not on date one.

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By *100Man
over a year ago

Essex

Sex on a first date is probably going to be a one night stand nsa getting to know each other and respecting each other would be more romantic for a lasting relationship don't you think

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Power to the people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never had a serious relationship with anyone i have had sex with on the first date.

I rather the build up with someone i cared enough about to have a serious relationship with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just roll with it

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

No

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think those that do are the I'll-behaved

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By *eardsandboobsCouple
over a year ago

north of lincoln

We had sex on our first date whilst watching city of angels. And we are still going strong

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"I think those that do are the I'll-behaved "

D4 damagers

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

Never had a first date so no clue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We had sex on our first date whilst watching city of angels. And we are still going strong "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have sex when you both feel it's right.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Absolutly not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if it's meant to be then it's meant to be, do what feels right not what someone else says you should.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ohhhhh shit ... Is that the reason I don't get relationships? I never fuck on the first date. Oh damn.....

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By *hocko87Man
over a year ago

dublin

if you want a long term relationship become good friends and then introduce sex so then you know that its a real relationship not just for sex .

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London

No, no and NO. You go that far when you BOTH feel the time is right.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

No. Both having the same or similar views on sex is important but not to do a predetermined ti_eline.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would rather know what the sex is going to be like rather than go through all the getting to know you then finding out the sex is going to be crap so sex on first date yeah

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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago

Scotland - Aberdeen

There is not a chance in hell I will be having sex on a first date these days!

Older and bloody wiser! Not going to happen!

Can't even find a bloody man who can actually hold a conversation these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is not a chance in hell I will be having sex on a first date these days!

Older and bloody wiser! Not going to happen!

Can't even find a bloody man who can actually hold a conversation these days "
likewise, I can't a find woman to hold a conversation.

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By *nowwhitexxx1Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I feel mixed about this... I like the idea of waiting.. Building up the tension and spending time getting to know someone.. Also if you have sex on the first date does that give the wrong impression.. Especially on dating sites.. (apart from tinder that's just a shag site ) BUT I also think if you have that spark and Chemistry why wait?? Just because you have sex does that mean things can't develop... So the jury is out for me. I'll let you know if it ever happens....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There doesn't have to be any rules. Each situation and the people involved are different. I'm sure there are plenty of successful longterm relationships that began with sex on the first, second or third etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't believe in having set rules. However, experience has shown me it's probably wise not to if I want it to go somewhere

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

I slept with my ex on the first night and we were together for 11 years.

No rules if it feels right go with it

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No but I don't think so. I have absolutely no problem with sex on a first date though. Mr N and I did nearly 39 years ago, we're still deciding if it's serious or not though.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I met my ex husband on the saturday night and didnt go home for a week and he married me. Wouldnt now though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. Go with the flow. If it happens, it happens but it shouldn't be a condition or an expectation.

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By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

Only if sex is the most important thing about a relationship to you.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Our relationship started with sex nearly 20 years ago.

So, I really don't think that how soon you have sex, has any impact on how the relationship will progress.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

We had sex with each other on our first date and nine years later we are still going strong .

Everyone is different of course , and sex may not be important to some . But for us it is , and it’s better to know sooner rather than later that you’re sexually compatible .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Each to their own.

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By *erving in the cornerCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

We were fwb for 8 months and now we're engaged, don't think it's necessary but it's fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to try before I buy, do not like nasty surprises further down the line after a number of dates, it is disappointing. Being brutally honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I slept with my ex before we dated, ended up together 6 years and a child but it was toxic, now I get to know someone first and if they are serious about having a relationship they will wait and get to know me as a person first.... that’s why Iv been single 3 years

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By *ky19Man
over a year ago

Plymouth OYO Hotel

No.

I've long believed it's better the other way around, and that one contributing reason a relationship can end up failing is because the cart went before the horse.

It feels right to me to let things flow naturally. I really don't believe sex (or even a kiss) on a first date is the right measure for success i.e. it's not a failure if you don't.

I often think the pressure to have sex on a first date comes from films, seldom very realistic, in which two people eye each other then a scene or two later they're banging each other. And so giving the message that's the way it has to be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think someone is looking for you OP"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only if their Dad owns a brewery as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not. "

So a fuck on a first date determines if or what a future relationship might be?

Isn't there rather more to compatibility?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not.

So a fuck on a first date determines if or what a future relationship might be?

Isn't there rather more to compatibility?"

Yes but there seems to be a lot of importance attached to it. It really is only a fuck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not for me.

I prefer to get to know someone first & stimulate the mind, and have mine stimulated.

Not just in dating, but on here too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 30/04/19 23:02:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not.

So a fuck on a first date determines if or what a future relationship might be?

Isn't there rather more to compatibility?"

Reading from the bottom up, I knew that would be you. Yes. The very most important thing in the world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will fuck if im horny if im horny il flirt harder make her laugh harder and have the sex if its fantastic we meet again and again its the circle of life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuck or not fuck all the same if theres connections

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By *entish79Man
over a year ago

Glasgow


" What are your thoughts "

You’re suggesting that the potential to have a serious relationship with someone is significantly reduced if you don’t have sex with them on a first date?

That can’t possibly be right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A fuck is just a fuck. Isn't a relationship something a little more?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I slept with my ex wife on our first date and we had nearly 20 years together.. its not all that bad tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not.

So a fuck on a first date determines if or what a future relationship might be?

Isn't there rather more to compatibility?

Yes but there seems to be a lot of importance attached to it. It really is only a fuck. "

And I don't want to be fucking someone forever who is an ice cube in bed.

Best to find out early on in the relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

99 % of successful relationships will not have had sex on the first date.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I probably wouldnt have agreed before being on here. But I think it could be a great idea, you get all the info you need from a person re compatibility and know if it is something that will blossom or not.

So a fuck on a first date determines if or what a future relationship might be?

Isn't there rather more to compatibility?

Yes but there seems to be a lot of importance attached to it. It really is only a fuck.

And I don't want to be fucking someone forever who is an ice cube in bed.

Best to find out early on in the relationship. "

I've had sex on a first date with nearly everyone I've been in a long-term relationship with and many that I haven't. I don't think badly of people who don't have sex on a first date but plenty think bad of me because I did. Oddly I won't have sex on a first swinging date.

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By *ornyhornytwoCouple
over a year ago

Bradford

We didn't have sex for like 4 or 5 and we still together and swinging over 15 years later... Don't think there has to be just sex to want to see someone again and anticipation is good xx

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

And they say romance is dead.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally haven't had sex on tue first date, but i know of others who have and have had relationships. I also know of some who have waited and then they realise the chemistry isnt what they hoped It's up to the two people involved. If they like each other, then they are not going to care about when they have sex. I dont think it's essential. Two people want to turn it into a relationship, or they don't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Only if sex is the most important thing about a relationship to you."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do whatever feels right!

My OH and I had sex on our first meet...3 and a half years later we're very much in love. It was a fab meet though at the time I very rarely played on a first meet! Don't regret it for one second!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Only if sex is the most important thing about a relationship to you."

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

No, I disagree. Sex should happen when you all feel ready and the situation is right. You may also not know that you want a serious relationship, so let the sex happen when you want it to.

Great to have the sexual attraction and interests but if it's a long term relationship, you'll have plenty of opportunity. Don't be too formulaic, let each relationship develop in its own way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex very important in a relationship for me. I want the intimacy and not a friendship alone relationship.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

How many people know on a first date that they want a serious relationship with that person? If a guy agrees to have sex with me the first time I meet him does it mean he wants a long term relationship with me or not? I'm confused now

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

On a first date? No. Granted sexual compatibility (IMO) is an important factor in a relationship but there are many other factors too. Plus sex is more likely to be better and more impressive to you both if you've had some time to bond first. So I would say sex early on in a relationship is important to judge sexual compatibility but by no means nesersary on a first date. Having said that I doesn't mean sex on a first date is bad per se. Its perfectly fine to have sex on a first date if things flow that way.

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry


"Do whatever feels right!

My OH and I had sex on our first meet...3 and a half years later we're very much in love. It was a fab meet though at the time I very rarely played on a first meet! Don't regret it for one second!"

That was us too, it was just ment to be a Fab meet. One and a half years now and I can't imagine future where we are not together. Sometimes you find love when it's unexpected.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relationships are so dynamic. Leave the rules outside. If it happens hey, if it doesnt she or he could still be the one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Completely disagree actually OP.

In fact, I'd say, if anything, it goes the other way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"99 % of successful relationships will not have had sex on the first date."

Seriously the amount of people here on this thread who make this statement garbage.....

How many we didn't have sex on our first date and here we are 10 years later stories are posted above, I don't remember seeing any...

Sex is good, whenever you get there!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"99 % of successful relationships will not have had sex on the first date.

Seriously the amount of people here on this thread who make this statement garbage.....

How many we didn't have sex on our first date and here we are 10 years later stories are posted above, I don't remember seeing any...

Sex is good, whenever you get there!"

My sister & her husband didn’t have sex on the first date, she told me the about how she waited 10 dates to have sex with him, her and her friends had this “thing” they did, but she & one other friend were the only ones who kept to the “rule”.

20 years later they’re still together and happy.

My parents were the same too, my mom loves to tell their “love story” as she calls it over and over lol! 34 years they’ve been together and

So there is probably many people who didn’t have sex on the first date who are still together.

No posts doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen!

I don’t think sex on the first date determines if your relationship will be successful or not to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, for me I don't think it's important

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"99 % of successful relationships will not have had sex on the first date.

Seriously the amount of people here on this thread who make this statement garbage.....

How many we didn't have sex on our first date and here we are 10 years later stories are posted above, I don't remember seeing any...

Sex is good, whenever you get there!

My sister & her husband didn’t have sex on the first date, she told me the about how she waited 10 dates to have sex with him, her and her friends had this “thing” they did, but she & one other friend were the only ones who kept to the “rule”.

20 years later they’re still together and happy.

My parents were the same too, my mom loves to tell their “love story” as she calls it over and over lol! 34 years they’ve been together and

So there is probably many people who didn’t have sex on the first date who are still together.

No posts doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen!

I don’t think sex on the first date determines if your relationship will be successful or not to be honest. "

Spot on and that was my point. Having sex on the first date is an utterly irrelevent measure as to whether a relationship will be successful or not.

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By *wingin CatMan
over a year ago

London


"I don’t think sex on the first date determines if your relationship will be successful or not to be honest. "

Exactly. And it's bloody selfish if just one side of the relationship demands that it happens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t think sex on the first date determines if your relationship will be successful or not to be honest.

Exactly. And it's bloody selfish if just one side of the relationship demands that it happens."

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I don’t think sex on the first date determines if your relationship will be successful or not to be honest.

Exactly. And it's bloody selfish if just one side of the relationship demands that it happens."

Then incompatibility is proved on a first date.

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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago

Stafford

Well I dno. I fucked my now husband the first time we met, it wasn't planned it just kinda happened, and it wasn't all romantic like hahah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No way sex is not important on a first date. If we are talking about looking for a relationship then I would want to get to know her in many other ways than sex!

I recently read a forum about this and a guy who was part of a couple said he loves his partner and he is happy in his relationship... He also went on to say if he was in a relationship where the woman lost her sex drive he wouldn't be with her.

Now that makes me think he doesn't love the woman who he is with.. Because if a man truly loves someone then it shouldn't matter if they lose their sex drive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relationships are about compatability. What is with all the rules and expectations. Go with the flow see what happens if something is meant to develop it will no matter wether you shag on a first date or not. What will ne will be with effort and communication and want.

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By *arlo82Couple
over a year ago

the gym and random places

If i am looking for life long I wouldn't gauge it on when... more rather how and why and how good it was and if we connected on a different level.

I've done the whole wait and get to know and end up attached to someone yet the sex is shit.

It's one of those things it either works or doesnt .

I've had mates meet off pof fuck on day 1 engaged and together years down the line

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The one that got away was sex on the first "date " it wasn't even a date I met him in a night club

We ended up together for 3yrs.

I ended it for someone else - and even though it was a REALLY long time ago - I regret it.

He was a beautiful man and we would have been happy.

I'm a complete knob

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All if my meaningful, long-term relationships have come from one night stands.

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral


"For me, no. If I'm building a serious relationship with someone then I'd think long and hard before sleeping with someone on a first date "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why sooooo serious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The one that got away was sex on the first "date " it wasn't even a date I met him in a night club

We ended up together for 3yrs.

I ended it for someone else - and even though it was a REALLY long time ago - I regret it.

He was a beautiful man and we would have been happy.

I'm a complete knob "

Awe you knob lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mr S and I met and didn’t have sex for 4 months!

I would never on a first date. Good things develop over time. I’m glad we waited. But poor bloke can’t get rid of me now hehe

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