FabSwingers.com forum: I don't know how to feel about this...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So tonight ive heard from the last girlfriend I had ... And found out the truth why she gave me the silent treatment.

It wasn't anything to do with me it's was more a problem with her ...

She explained that she couldn't cope with how romantic I was and no one treated her the way I did.. She's never experienced that kind of love before and thought that she didn't deserve it, panicked and thought that she wasnt good enough for me and that I deserved better than her....

It's taken 6 months to get the truth and I just don't know how to process it.... to me she was everything I couldn't have asked for anyone else .. but the last few months have been hell for me wondering and stressing why it happened ..... ..

... I'm just void of any emotions... I don't know what to feel.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

how long did you go out with her for

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

4 months...

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

well if you where only with her 4 months maybe you where to full on to quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like an elongated mind fuck to me. But I know nothing about your situation other than this statement....

I just spent the best part of a year escaping that kinda stop start, won't let go, nonsense, tell her she's beautiful but move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds like you are 'full on'

It's important to find a partner that wants the attention if you're that way inclined

I know I'd feel smothered by someone who made it all about me or 'us'

Other people want just that

Regardless, she's water under the bridge, she's not the one for you, move on. Find a girl that appreciates you and how you are.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Sleep on it, let what she's said sink in a bit and give yourself time to process what she's said. Bear in mind that she's taken six months to tell you something that she could easily have told you when your relationship ended.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think you’ll find what you’re seemingly looking for on here

I mean that in the nicest of ways too

This is just me reading between the lines of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s a lot to be said for being too full on. I’m guilty of doing it. I’m always very complimentary to guys I’m interested in cos I’m putting on what I think I want, I’m attentive I’ll let the person know exactly what my intent is and how I feel about them. But, when I was faced with the same treatment from a guy recently I was like woah, this isn’t what the bastards I fancy do, they don’t text me in the morning telling me I’m the first thing they think about, they don’t message me just to ask how my day is going, they don’t text back within seconds of me texting them. It put me off, tame is my witness to this, I had to kick the guy into touch cos it felt too much and was off putting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s either a beautiful tale of unrequited romantic love, or a story of someone who got WAY too intense and scarily clingy too quickly.

Both are the exactly the same story but depending on who is on the receiving end of it, it can be interpreted in totally different ways.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Did she contact you ? Or did she respond to you contacting her ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you believe her OP?

Some people can’t accept that level of attention, they do feel not worthy of it.

Some people will say what they think will least hurt the person, rejection wise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did she contact you ? Or did she respond to you contacting her ?"

this is the key to this whole scenario. Was she proactive in contacting you unprompted, or responding to your pleas?

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"So tonight ive heard from the last girlfriend I had ... And found out the truth why she gave me the silent treatment.

It wasn't anything to do with me it's was more a problem with her ...

... I'm just void of any emotions... I don't know what to feel.

Feel sad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feel sad for her but take it as a lesson learned and move forward

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok you want to know of an experience I had with a girl not on the site well everything seemed good at first then the texts got less everyday she wouldn’t reply for hours but we both agreed we wanted things to get serious met each other’s family but I wasn’t allowed to go to her house not knock at the door or pick her up from the door I found this extremely strange.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Ok you want to know of an experience I had with a girl not on the site well everything seemed good at first then the texts got less everyday she wouldn’t reply for hours but we both agreed we wanted things to get serious met each other’s family but I wasn’t allowed to go to her house not knock at the door or pick her up from the door I found this extremely strange. "

And then....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

She contacted me. .. in some way we knew it wouldn't last too ... Just I wish she talked first.. she just left me hanging and moved away without talking first, didn't even tell me she was planning it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok things just got more and more strange she would say I would never cheat on you but I went away for the weekend she turned around and said I was gay because a guy was looking at me so she can push me away she would say I enjoy waking up to your good morning message and on a few occasions she wouldn’t even reply it felt like I was in a part time relationship I would offer to help her with things she would say you ain’t giving me a choice but her neighbours would be allowed to go to her house but I wasn’t she wouldn’t even accept my instagram invite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She contacted me. .. in some way we knew it wouldn't last too ... Just I wish she talked first.. she just left me hanging and moved away without talking first, didn't even tell me she was planning it.

I would say she must have of known she was moving but we basically upped and moved within a month so, she might not have known.

I can say this OP, when we first got together I found it hard as doughnut was so different from my first husband, so so different, I actually ended it after the first couple of weeks as I couldn’t handle it but then I realised that there was something that I couldn’t shake (his bum mainly

) but my point is, some people can feel overwhelmed by too much, especially too soon and it’s not because you’ve done anything wrong but the other person just isn’t used to it, it can be overwhelming but that said, there is such a thing as too much love too soon, maybe next time hang back a little and learn from this.

Danish x

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