FabSwingers.com forum: "larger ladies survey"

By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes coz I’m overweight but I don’t think I’m particularly fat. I don’t like the word.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I hate the word fat and I do find it disrespectful and would rather use curvy or bbw but if women openly states she is fat I have no problem with that but I still wouldn't use the word

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Yes (well, it depends, but you don't want the ambiguity). The word has become too loaded, too toxic. It might be true (although becoming less so for me at the moment), but I don't think it's too hard for people to modify their language slightly (as I would do for them). Overweight, curvy, etc.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !"

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes (well, it depends, but you don't want the ambiguity). The word has become too loaded, too toxic. It might be true (although becoming less so for me at the moment), but I don't think it's too hard for people to modify their language slightly (as I would do for them). Overweight, curvy, etc. "

your so right

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true. "

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they were saying it to try to hurt my feelings they make me laugh, at them.

My weight isn't something someone can use as a weapon against me as it's virtually impossible to offend me.

I don't see why my weight should be something to be expected, or disrespected.

If it's an abusive comment it's abuse.

If it's a flattering comment it's flattery.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it. "

That's factual, not disrespectful.

Some might say you're being biased , or digging women out, as there are also a high proportion of fat men in British society too.

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By *utie91Woman
over a year ago

Hitchin

Yes it’s rude

However I think it’s one of those words that is ok to be used if it’s being said by the person themselves, but not by others.

For example, I will often refer to myself as being fat and needing to loose weight. Or refer to things as fat clothes.... I know I’m fat I just don’t need anybody else to tell me that I am. It’s really hard to try to loose weight when other people are body shaming.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

In a neutral sense I wouldn't mind it - so that's a no from me.

I'm fat and although there's a myriad of flowery terms to place a nice veneer on it, I'd much rather it was said as is. I'm not sure it's so much as a reclamation of the term for me, moreso I couldn't care less because I am and it doesn't upset me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it. "

Well yeah I have seen a lot of women that are open about their body and are happy that's fine with me and im glad that they are happy but it won't change my views of the word fat if that makes sense sorry its Monday lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it’s rude

However I think it’s one of those words that is ok to be used if it’s being said by the person themselves, but not by others.

Exactly my points your looking well to be fair

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it. "

I think it's more polite to say overweight. I wouldn't make a fuss, but you lose nothing in the meaning by saying overweight. "Fat" is too often used as a weapon to not be a bit jarring.

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By *ananas57Couple
over a year ago

lake ariel

YES

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it.

That's factual, not disrespectful.

Some might say you're being biased , or digging women out, as there are also a high proportion of fat men in British society too.

I restricted it to women as theres far more issues around women's body image than there is around men's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d find it offensive yes.

My personal experience on here with one particular guy who used the word “fat” within a message that was a derogatory comment/remark.

Usually happens when they ask if you want to meet and if you politely decline...... there comments usually comes back regarding your weight!

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"Yes it’s rude

However I think it’s one of those words that is ok to be used if it’s being said by the person themselves, but not by others.

I'm not talking about telling an individual they're fat. I agree that would be rude. I'm talking about general statements. Is saying "the proportion of fat women in society is increasing" disrespectful?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes it is..very rude and disrespectful. Some of us have good reason !

Yeah. It often comes with a context of "and lazy". Which isn't always true.

I meant where it was it sentence like "there has been an increase in the proportion of fat women in British society ", i. e purely descriptive.

I raised the question because on the other thread lots of women were saying they were fine with it.

That's factual, not disrespectful.

Some might say you're being biased , or digging women out, as there are also a high proportion of fat men in British society too.

I restricted it to women as theres far more issues around women's body image than there is around men's "

On here, or in general?

Possibly because men suck it up and cry at home when they're called fat and women get publicly upset and angry.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

Where as you can do something about being fat. But as we live in a snowflake society where everyone is offended by something and no one likes being told what to do we have to walk on eggshells just incase someone gets upset by being told the truth!!!!

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes..if you are going to say something..then say overweight.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

Mr"

People don't put others down for being tall. And there are reasons why someone is overweight that can't readily be fixed, including health reasons you don't and can't know about.

And just because something is offensive doesn't mean we don't get on. There's strength in trying to change things for the better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

People don't put others down for being tall. And there are reasons why someone is overweight that can't readily be fixed, including health reasons you don't and can't know about.

And just because something is offensive doesn't mean we don't get on. There's strength in trying to change things for the better. "

The OP said it was in a neutral conversation and it was being used to be descriptive. Tall people get called lanky if they are slim. People seem to go on the defensive very early with this topic, I wonder why ?!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

People don't put others down for being tall. And there are reasons why someone is overweight that can't readily be fixed, including health reasons you don't and can't know about.

And just because something is offensive doesn't mean we don't get on. There's strength in trying to change things for the better.

I'm not actually feeling especially defensive. I'm answering the question. I think it's a word that needs softening given broader context. I don't think that's a sign of weakness, it's a sign of politeness.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

And while lanky is not a word I use often, if I did and it bothered people, I'd try to use it less.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like being called stick insect!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m overweight for my height - just and have been called fat this morning by someone to my mailbox, blocked them

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

People don't put others down for being tall. And there are reasons why someone is overweight that can't readily be fixed, including health reasons you don't and can't know about.

And just because something is offensive doesn't mean we don't get on. There's strength in trying to change things for the better.

To be fair, even terms used neutrally can be inherently offensive. If I'm referring to a certain ethnic group in Bradford, calling them "paki people in Bradford" would be seen as offensive by most people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well... I am fat, why should I be offended to be defined as fat? Of course is different according to the whole sentence. If it's my doctor saying it, I don't mind. If it's a guy... "Wow I love fat!" and "Come back when you have lost 20kg" is of course two different stories.

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

People don't put others down for being tall. And there are reasons why someone is overweight that can't readily be fixed, including health reasons you don't and can't know about.

And just because something is offensive doesn't mean we don't get on. There's strength in trying to change things for the better.

My point in this thread was to see how far the term has, like "queer", been "reclaimed" by those it has been used to insult.

Not very much it would seem thus far.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am fat, I think it depends how it’s said and context. Said in a certain way it would piss me off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll have to do another survey OP for skinny, tall folks x

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

This is a question of semantics. Fat / overweight / obese describe the exact same physical state. I've found that people who are very self conscious with their weight are more easily offended with the word "fat". I personally use obese or overweight anyway.

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By *urvyandNerdyCouple
over a year ago

Doncaster

Doesn’t bother me in any context it’s used. I’m fat there’s no denying it

That’s being said no one has to go out of their way to be a dickhead about it, the way some do, especially on here hiding behind their basic boring profiles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t mind the word to describe me because that’s what I am, I am fat, I am obese. Obviously there are nicer words such as curvy etc but to me someone that is curvy is someone that is a little bit bigger, not rolls of fat.

I would like to say everyone identifies differently and prefers to use didn’t ways to describe themselves and that’s totally cool.

However if I am in an argument etc and someone came out with you are such a fat bitch, I wouldn’t be too happy about it but again they are just pointing out the obvious but that’s a hurtful way to call someone fat, context is the key.

Like the other thread said ‘where are all the beautiful fat women at’ there is nothing wrong with how he worded it he gets turned on by pretty fat women but also in the same breath one persons fat is another’s skinny, did the poster mean women that are on the bigger side or actually fat women? Because they are two totally different things.

That’s me anyway.

Danish x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In a neutral sense I wouldn't mind it - so that's a no from me.

Yep, what Meli said

It doesn't bother me in the slightest unless it's used as a derogatory term towards me, in which case I always reply with "my weight is only your concern if I'm sat on your face"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it's true I am fat xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't bother me one way or t'other to be honest. I'm fat, let's call a spade a spade.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not. "

In a neutral way I’m not offended, but if someone is using it as part of an insult then yes that’s offensive x

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

In a neutral way I’m not offended, but if someone is using it as part of an insult then yes that’s offensive x "

This.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Yes..if you are going to say something..then say overweight. "

Yup, the word fat is irrevocably associated with an insult, you might as well call a black man a n****** and tell him it's simply a word.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I am fat. No denying it. But I personally do find certain words offensive. Obese is another.

If someone said I like you flab it may be a passion killer.. but if they said I like your curves then it means the same thing but sounds better.

I love tall men but the word lanky COULD possibly hurt someone's feelings so I choose to use the nicer option.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I describe myself as fat, people can’t insult me with that term coz let’s face it it’s not like I’ve never seen myself in a mirror

Some people are sensitive about the term others like myself aren’t bothered, no matter what term is used someone will pull you up on it, just look at the threads asking for curvy ladies and how many jump on them to point out we aren’t curvy but fat/obese et al.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Yes..if you are going to say something..then say overweight.

Yup, the word fat is irrevocably associated with an insult, you might as well call a black man a n****** and tell him it's simply a word."

Yeah, I think this is it. The word might be accurate, like that word derives from the Latin word for black. But it's become ugly. It might be reclaimed. It might be in the process of being reclaimed. But in the meantime, particularly when not describing yourself and/or if you're not in that group, it's probably better avoided.

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

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By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

The word has a negative association.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it "

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are these things always aimed at women there are overweight men as well!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I hate being called fat. Mrscxxx

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Being called fat is a derogatory term and disrespectful to either a male or a female accepting being called Fat shows a self Loathing be more positive it's fine to be big but don't except being shamed by other people calling you fat..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Being called fat is a derogatory term and disrespectful to either a male or a female accepting being called Fat shows a self Loathing be more positive it's fine to be big but don't except being shamed by other people calling you fat..

well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would rather sleep with a woman who had abit meat on the bone. Than a size 4 woman who needs feed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well said"

Exactly that, shouldn't have to put up with a derogatory time simply because other people think it is acceptable.

If I choose to describe myself as fat is my choice it is not that anybody else to tell me how I describe my body.

For example if I choose to call Myself curvy, nobody should say actually I think you're more fat and curvy.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I don’t loathe myself at all and I would rather be upfront about my body shape and size, if I call myself curvy the next person will say no you are fat/obese so I just cut out the middle man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a MASSIVE fan of curves / bbw / voluptuous women.

I genuinely find larger women so attractive and they all have the cutest faces.

I would never use the word fat as fat can mean so many things to different people.

Also being a bit ‘fat’ myself I can’t exaxtly call people fat.

Personally I think there are more acceptable and fitting words over the word ‘fat’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I’m a large lady and it bothers me some what. But I hate being called fat besides my body Is dumb and a lot of my weight is muscle according to the doctor

Mrscxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not. "

Yes it’s not a word we’re taight to describe body types in any other way than disrespectful from a very early age, children aren’t taught anything other than fat is bad from primary school and sometimes earlier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t loathe myself at all and I would rather be upfront about my body shape and size, if I call myself curvy the next person will say no you are fat/obese so I just cut out the middle man

I think that was worded badly but you have just hit the nail on the head! I think by saying if you call yourself curvy somebody is going to tell you you are fat and therefore you choose the describe yourself in a derogatory way before the next person can, which is not ok. It seems to be perfectly acceptable to bash somebody for being overweight you only have to look at the threads on this site.

there was one particular distaste one a couple of weeks ago and when I commented and said I didn't think it was ok, I was told (by some people actually commenting on this thread saying that it's unacceptable to call someone fat) saying oh well it's just tongue in cheek and if you were offended by it you shouldn't read the thread or it's just a bit of fun.

That's my point it should not be fun to take the piss out of somebody's body size.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

Mr"

Not every big person is fat ! If you did a fat analysis on someone you think is overweight you might be surprised at the results and some skinny people have a night fat ratio in their bodies so fat doesn’t explain anything to do with body shapes tall however is tall no doubt about it because tall is a measure fat is not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it's a horrid word imo there are better words for an overweight person.

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By *urvyandNerdyCouple
over a year ago

Doncaster

It everyone that’s accepts being called fat loathes themselves in fact I actually find that assumption more offensive than the word itself

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not. "

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight."

Yes I should’ve said , and in the manner in which it is delivered . But you are quite right there are far more appropriate words to use .

It isn’t a word that I would use towards anyone!!!

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight.

Yes I should’ve said , and in the manner in which it is delivered . But you are quite right there are far more appropriate words to use .

It isn’t a word that I would use towards anyone!!!"

Which words are ok to use?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

The point is there isn't a simple yes and no answer.

And on such an emotive subject. to expect people to just use one word is just not going to cut it. That's why I almost everybody has added something, it isn't a question that can be answered usually by a simple yes or no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight.

Yes I should’ve said , and in the manner in which it is delivered . But you are quite right there are far more appropriate words to use .

It isn’t a word that I would use towards anyone!!!

Which words are ok to use?"

A simple answer is if in doubt don't say anything

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight.

Yes I should’ve said , and in the manner in which it is delivered . But you are quite right there are far more appropriate words to use .

It isn’t a word that I would use towards anyone!!!

Which words are ok to use?"

No doubt you are about to tell me !!

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By *urvyandNerdyCouple
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

You tell us since you’ve not answered it either

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

I'm fat couldn't give a flying fuck who as a problem with it I'm happy and that all that counts .and if some one uses the word fat it doesn't bother me .

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By *inkyLondonpair OP Couple
over a year ago

London

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

Indeed. I specifically phrased the question to ask if people felt it disrespectful to refer to "fat women" in some neutral sentence.

Now we have everyone talking about whether it's OK to call them fat...

I despair sometimes about people being unable to discuss an abstract issue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would rather sleep with a woman who had abit meat on the bone. Than a size 4 woman who needs feed."

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"It’s only offensive to say the word if that person it’s aimed at feels offended by it

Most do because it it irrevocably associated with an insult, and there are perfectly acceptable 'unloaded' words, like overweight.

Yes I should’ve said , and in the manner in which it is delivered . But you are quite right there are far more appropriate words to use .

It isn’t a word that I would use towards anyone!!!

Which words are ok to use?

A simple answer is if in doubt don't say anything

Do i tell people i need to move more, and eat less because I'm becoming too voluptuous?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would rather sleep with a woman who had abit meat on the bone. Than a size 4 woman who needs feed."

There’s always one who has to mention “meat on the bone”...

Let’s see how long it takes for a “real women” comment to appear....

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By *ad123Man
over a year ago

ayr Scotland

I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

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By *osmosgirlWoman
over a year ago

Wetherby

Yes, I think it is disrespectful.

I prefer pleasantly plump or rubinesque

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW "

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Why are these things always aimed at women there are overweight men as well!"

Fat bastuds.....

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

Honestly, some of these questions make me wonder if people on here have ever met other people in their lives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer. "

So I got cancer because I am fat?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

Indeed. I specifically phrased the question to ask if people felt it disrespectful to refer to "fat women" in some neutral sentence.

Now we have everyone talking about whether it's OK to call them fat...

I despair sometimes about people being unable to discuss an abstract issue. "

But that's the point, you don't want people to discuss it. You always want simple yes or no and some of the questions you ask don't have a simple answer.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?"

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

Indeed. I specifically phrased the question to ask if people felt it disrespectful to refer to "fat women" in some neutral sentence.

Now we have everyone talking about whether it's OK to call them fat...

I despair sometimes about people being unable to discuss an abstract issue.

But that's the point, you don't want people to discuss it. You always want simple yes or no and some of the questions you ask don't have a simple answer."

Because it was already being discussed....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?"

I had cancer and I'm not overweight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I call myself fat and it is a very accurate description. I am not curvy I don't have particularly big boobs. But no I would never call another woman fat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference"

Mine was cervical so probably not because I'm fat but because I've had lots of sexual partners

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer. "

Yet there are indeed other diseases that can develop as a consequence of the more negative, bitter or neurotic personalities, of course.

Excess weight is also detrimental to health, no denying it, but that does not give anyone the right to insult either the overweight or the bitter and twisted.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

Mine was cervical so probably not because I'm fat but because I've had lots of sexual partners "

Yup, and I'm sure your promiscuity will be judged by many too!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

Yet there are indeed other diseases that can develop as a consequence of the more negative, bitter or neurotic personalities, of course.

Excess weight is also detrimental to health, no denying it, but that does not give anyone the right to insult either the overweight or the bitter and twisted."

And it's shown that weight shaming contributes to obesity, so those who claim to care might like to think about how to be part of the solution not the problem.

As to thread drift, it's inevitable I'm afraid!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

No its not offensive

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By *andare63Man
over a year ago

oldham

"Again another survey and deriving from the other thread.

This one is for women who consider themselves fat /overweight/BbW or whatever and the question is this

Would you consider someone calling someone of your body type "fat" disrespectful. Assume its in a neutral conversation and used in a descriptive way, not as part of an insult.

Just say yes if you consider it disrespectful, no if not.

Why can't anyone here read a simple OP?

Indeed. I specifically phrased the question to ask if people felt it disrespectful to refer to "fat women" in some neutral sentence.

Now we have everyone talking about whether it's OK to call them fat...

I despair sometimes about people being unable to discuss an abstract issue. "

Despair? That’s a bit severe OP !! Perhaps you need to speak to someone ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

Mine was cervical so probably not because I'm fat but because I've had lots of sexual partners

Yup, and I'm sure your promiscuity will be judged by many too!

Probably but fuck em

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats it's true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

Mine was cervical so probably not because I'm fat but because I've had lots of sexual partners

Yup, and I'm sure your promiscuity will be judged by many too!

Probably but fuck em

xx"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So what if someone is tall and that person doesn't like being referred to as tall. Does this mean everyone who is tall should be called something different??

I think the difference is people can't do anything about their height.

I am not suggesting being mean or horrible and intentionally nasty but if you are 30st and 5 ft 4" tall your not curvey are you?

We are all guilty these days of irrational behaviour and over sensitivity myself included.

Buy I think there's a lot of people who are going to have a very long difficult life if they spend their entire time getting offended by pretty much everything.

Oh and btw I consider myself fat.

Mr"

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term. "

You are always the Voice of Reason and common sense.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term.

You are always the Voice of Reason and common sense.

Thank you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term.

You are always the Voice of Reason and common sense.

Thank you

I've just stolen what you said and put it on another thread!

please still be my friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term. "

Like that

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term.

You are always the Voice of Reason and common sense.

Thank you

I've just stolen what you said and put it on another thread!

please still be my friend

of course x

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don’t like it and I would be upset by the term.

Fat is what people have, it is not what they are. It’s an incorrect term. "

Good point. Adipose tissue. Sometimes even relaxed muscle lol!

Everyone has some fat, it's only a question of degree, which is totally subjective in the debatable range.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

If they said 'you have a fat belly' then no. They are describing something of mine that is fat (providing it was in context with the conversation). If they just said 'you're fat' then maybe.

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

Any whoooooo there is no right or wrong, people can call themselves whatever they like, others won’t like it, that is up to them.

So no it’s not disrespectful and yes it is

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

This is quite interesting:

Description Women Men

Lean 14–20% 6–13%

Fitness 21–24% 14–17%

Average 25–31% 18–24%

Obese 32%+ 25%+

I hope anyone calling anyone fat knows for sure they are under 31/24%

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference"

My bothers best friend had just passed away from testicular cancer at 47, he had never been fat, life doesn’t always follow a patern or a diagram

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. It's a descriptor. I am fat. Doesn't mean I'm not also sexy and talented.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

Yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hope you're going to do a 'skinny' survey tomorrow OP. I like your surveys. The yes and no answers make it really easy to calculate the results.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hope you're going to do a 'skinny' survey tomorrow OP. I like your surveys. The yes and no answers make it really easy to calculate the results.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have fat, I am not fat.... I am many other things also.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others"

I don’t.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have fat, I am not fat.... I am many other things also. "

I love that saying, I saw a funny meme that said:

"You have fat, you're not fat. You have toes, you're not a toe"

Made me smile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others

I don’t. "

good on ya,,unfortunately some do

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

My bothers best friend had just passed away from testicular cancer at 47, he had never been fat, life doesn’t always follow a patern or a diagram

Are you arguing with scientific research now sandy? I knew a guy who smoked and didn't get cancer, but it doesn't make them good for you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's about the person not the size of someone so hello BBW

Unfortunately, personality rarely gives you diabetes, heart failure, or cancer.

So I got cancer because I am fat?

I don't know your medical history, however this is from cancer research.

Yes, obesity is the second biggest preventable cause of cancer in the UK- more than 1 in 20 cancer cases are caused by excess weight

The risk is higher the more weight a person gains and the longer they are overweight for

The good news is small changes that are kept up over time can make a real difference

My bothers best friend had just passed away from testicular cancer at 47, he had never been fat, life doesn’t always follow a patern or a diagram

Are you arguing with scientific research now sandy? I knew a guy who smoked and didn't get cancer, but it doesn't make them good for you..."

I think you might need to wind it in a little bit because you are becoming very offensive.

Let's not start blaming people for getting cancer. This is exactly why threads like this are offensive because you always end up with comments like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope not in the slightest. I get more annoyed when someone says oh but your not fat as I obviously have lots of fat so they are obviously being sycophantic.

Or the whole pretty face thing which I've had for yeays., Nice face Shame about the rest...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty lady

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if its offensive and upsets people so much,,i understand that but why do the same people use offensive terminology towards others

I don’t.

good on ya,,unfortunately some do"

Two wrongs do not make a right and because some people that are larger aren't particularly nice does not mean that other people can just be downright offensive.

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By *arpePinguisWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

Cheerfully refer to myself as a fat bird

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No. It's a descriptor. I am fat. Doesn't mean I'm not also sexy and talented."

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By *unningFoxWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Depends on a day and who said it haha I will be offended if my mum would say it as she have tournented me all my life but if stranger that I will probably have a giggle

I had best situation in sauna recently when 2 russian guys came in and one of them didn’t like look of me and complained to his friend in Russian how fat I am but his friend asked if he do not have enough space and told him to look at himself

I just giggled and they had no idea I could understand them plus later in pool I accidentally splash him and apologised