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Things that happen in films, that never happen in real life ?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

A woman in a film who's just had sex, must always get up and head to the shower with the the bedsheet wrapped around her body and for some reason will take the whole thing with her to the bathroom. Leaving the bloke lying there like an idiot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one ever cleans up or has to pee after sex. They just fall asleep in each others arms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A woman in a film who's just had sex, must always get up and head to the shower with the the bedsheet wrapped around her body and for some reason will take the whole thing with her to the bathroom. Leaving the bloke lying there like an idiot. "

I do that in real life

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

People hiding from aliens under their beds....who has space under their bed? Mines full of shoes, bags and naughty things!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s never a wet patch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one says half way through “ I need to wee” or farts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gun fights where they don't get shot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then the both wake up looking perfectly made up and not some drooling gargoyle with crazy hair.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A woman in a film who's just had sex, must always get up and head to the shower with the the bedsheet wrapped around her body and for some reason will take the whole thing with her to the bathroom. Leaving the bloke lying there like an idiot. "

Sadly, I think there is probably some truth in this as so many women have a poor body image and don't like being seen naked even by their lovers. Not something I would ever dream of doing though. As for unrealistic things in films - happy endings (in the original sense of the phrase). Some ambiguity is always more interesting and realistic

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By *rNaughtyNickMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"And the prince and princess lived happy ever after"....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All great detectives have a sad back story or are heavy drinkers. They also manage to work off hunches.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know there's a serial killer/Alien/zombie/monster on the loose, you hear a noise and go straight down to the pitch black basement on your own, with just a torch.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No one has the same name, never see two Gary’s or two Steve’s in a film.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"No one says half way through “ I need to wee” or farts."

Nope and definately no fanny farts

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Shooting" the lock off a door. Looks like ricochet city to me...and yet..

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By *eriousGuyABCMan
over a year ago

( WEST OF ) Chippenham ish

Fights that last for ages, esp in spy ie James Bond films or Jason Statham films. A real fight lasts seconds generally. And they keep getting up !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No human being can balance on the wings of a fighter jet and shoot the enemy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fights that last for ages, esp in spy ie James Bond films or Jason Statham films. A real fight lasts seconds generally. And they keep getting up !"

Tell that to Ali or Foreman

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Every bomb has a timer with huge red digital display counting down to when it goes off and it's always stopped at 0:01 by the good guy.

The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.

The sex is never rubbish or ruined by the guy prematurely ejaculating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Every bomb has a timer with huge red digital display counting down to when it goes off and it's always stopped at 0:01 by the good guy.

The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.

The sex is never rubbish or ruined by the guy prematurely ejaculating"

That last one reminded me a bit of the film about time when the sex was shit so he kept going back in time until he got it right

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks


"No one has the same name, never see two Gary’s or two Steve’s in a film. "

Made me lol...my life is a rollercoaster of Gary's and Steve's!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

People in films rarely need the toilet it seems.

Using 24 as a guideline - it's possible to get from Trafalgar Square to Docklands by car in less than 5 minutes and then be at Wembley 30 minutes later

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Baddies take it in turns to fight with the protagonist

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

You're hard as fuck! Just wiped out hoards of yakuza, mossad, sas, navy seals, aliens from every dimension, beaten black and blue without uttering a moan but flinch and groan when a hot totty dabs your bruise with a drop of tcp!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Baddies take it in turns to fight with the protagonist "

We often laugh at this: they form an orderly queue and wait their turn!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

If the scene is London, Big Ben, Tower Bridge seen from the window. Paris it's the Eiffel Tower, Rome the Coliseum, Prague the Charles Bridge and/or the castle etc.

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By *he SurveyorMan
over a year ago

Bury

Guns that never run out of ammo.

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By *eriousGuyABCMan
over a year ago

( WEST OF ) Chippenham ish


"Fights that last for ages, esp in spy ie James Bond films or Jason Statham films. A real fight lasts seconds generally. And they keep getting up !

Tell that to Ali or Foreman"

That's totally different from a bare knuckle street fight between supposed normal people in life in general

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By *eriousGuyABCMan
over a year ago

( WEST OF ) Chippenham ish


"You're hard as fuck! Just wiped out hoards of yakuza, mossad, sas, navy seals, aliens from every dimension, beaten black and blue without uttering a moan but flinch and groan when a hot totty dabs your bruise with a drop of tcp!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The big guys getting the girls haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Makeup never streaks- sex, fighting, shower/swimming, you name it, they always look perfect- and that’s just the guys xx

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Uber villains have to come up with an inventive way to kill the hero (that provides the hero with opportunity to escape from the predicament) rather than just put a bullet between the eyes at the first opportunity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frogs don’t turn into a Prince.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

The ugly guy gets the hotty because she likes his personality

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By *VxrMan
over a year ago

Newton le Willows

Buying a takeaway coffee & being able to drink it straight away without burning your mouth, spitting it out & proclaiming "f*uck that's hot".

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Car chases where the hero is doing 140 mph desperately trying to shake off the bad guys through the town, city and open roads.

Then a few weeks later In the film they never open the post and say ffs I've got a speed camera ticket.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ancient Chinese warriors levitating to the top of bamboo groves to fight a duel.

A surpressor on a revolver.

Cowboys losing their hats in a chase on horseback and wearing the same hats a few miles away in the next shot.

Smoke rising upward in outer space.

Sound in the vacuum of outer space.

Spacecraft maneuvering like fighter jets.

Extraterrestrials who can speak human languages.

Extraterrestrials who can mate with humans.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone stands stock still for 90 mins and gets paid for it....Any Steven Segal film

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By *eriousGuyABCMan
over a year ago

( WEST OF ) Chippenham ish

The good guys winning the girl, like that happens !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People will leave a bar even if they have most of their drink left.

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By *iss.RedWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

You live happily ever after

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Killing people carries very little consequence in fact seems to be rewarded..

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

The Fast and Furious bulshit.

Literally everything

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By *ornylittlesubWoman
over a year ago

Grangemouth

What Women Want.

A man actually knowing this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" The Fast and Furious bulshit.

Literally everything"

I was about to say that

150 mile runway

Rock getting clogged in the face with a spanner the size of someone's leg and brushing it off like it was nothing

Cars flying out the planes with parachutes

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish


"A woman in a film who's just had sex, must always get up and head to the shower with the the bedsheet wrapped around her body and for some reason will take the whole thing with her to the bathroom. Leaving the bloke lying there like an idiot. "

The guy always gets his dream girl if he’s ‘nice’ - same applies to the girl if she’s ‘nice’!

Sadly that’s not as common in real life!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That the lonely geeky girl gets the school hotty or that she has to change herself completely to get him.

A mum takes the time to make loads of food in the mornings for breakfast (with full make up) only for the family not to eat it.

Danish x

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria


" The Fast and Furious bulshit.

Literally everything

I was about to say that

150 mile runway

Rock getting clogged in the face with a spanner the size of someone's leg and brushing it off like it was nothing

Cars flying out the planes with parachutes"

I know drivers me crazy ...

There was one where dragging a safe it defied the Law of Physical by actually speed up when the tower was released..

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

No matter where the characters are and depending on the plot they always get a mobile signal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not killing your absolutely worst enemy immediately while you have the upper hand (mostly gun pointing at face) talk,talk,talk, and more talk he gets free to kill you or his friends come to the rescue and kill you.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

No one ever takes a shit in a movie

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By *onygirlieWoman
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Nobody says goodbye or similar when on the phone to signal that the conversation has ended.

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Merton

Slow motions

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Jobs in which they can stand around just talking without getting moaned at.

Cute friends who drop everything, when you're having a bad day.

Walking into a cafe or bar and your friends are already in there and it wasn't planned.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

In historic movies, they always agree to set out at daybreak, but no one confirms what time daybreak is, but still everyone’s manages to be ready on time and no one ever over sleeps!

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Uber villains have to come up with an inventive way to kill the hero (that provides the hero with opportunity to escape from the predicament) rather than just put a bullet between the eyes at the first opportunity "
....and sit there for a good few minutes explaining this in detail to the hero..

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"No matter where the characters are and depending on the plot they always get a mobile signal."

...unless they're being chased by baddies and a call to police would save the day.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"Nobody says goodbye or similar when on the phone to signal that the conversation has ended. "

I've been known to mutter "how rude!" at the screen for that.

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