FabSwingers.com forum: take over the world

By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

im fed up cant we take over the world again hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

haha

Why stop at the world lets go for the universe

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

im too tired to take over the world or universe so il make do with England for now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

looks like a lot of the troops are tucked up in beddy bo's now

we'll av to do a barrack inspection first thing

i'll check how shiny their boots are, you can check how shiny they are in other areas

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

ooo lovely and can i start making quartermasters lists again pretty please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ooo lovely and can i start making quartermasters lists again pretty please"

this is your revolution, you make as many lists as you like !

well not too many if we're flying ryanair - you know what they're like for charging for excess baggage !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I ain't taking over any world if I have to fly ryanair to do it. Can't we go Virgin instead?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I ain't taking over any world if I have to fly ryanair to do it. Can't we go Virgin instead?"

Upper class I'm assuming ?

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By *azzaahhWoman
over a year ago

north wales / chester

barrack inspection ??does that mean i have to get up early ??? bloody hope not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry wishy, it's looking like ryanair

have had a word with sir richard and he's not having it at all

won't let us charter a plane and can't afford tickets for us all, so unless we hijack one we're knackered

it'll be easier to just book ryanair,but make sure you print your boarding passes in advance

them surcharges could be the difference between shooting peas or mashed potato

am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"looks like a lot of the troops are tucked up in beddy bo's now

we'll av to do a barrack inspection first thing

i'll check how shiny their boots are, you can check how shiny they are in other areas

Reporting for duty

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Ryan air?

What sort of two bit operation is this???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"barrack inspection ??does that mean i have to get up early ??? bloody hope not

ur safe cazzah - you're on the late shift

i think in this case, it's men first and women and last

ya know what lacey's like, she likes a man who rises early

you watch, she'll be up all night polishing helmets in preparation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ryan air?

What sort of two bit operation is this???

in the spirit of the forums today, we're having a working class one

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

I've got a pilot with a Huey

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By *azzaahhWoman
over a year ago

north wales / chester

oo im so pleased ..might stay up late then .now wheres my fb when u need him

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

looks like we have the start of a revolution yeeha now wheres my pen and paper

how many tickets was that then,have to get sparkly breatsplates as well then Lulu might come back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got a pilot with a Huey"

why am i now thinking 'a' team ?

we'll be making tanks out of spoons and old hoovers next

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"I've got a pilot with a Huey

why am i now thinking 'a' team ?

we'll be making tanks out of spoons and old hoovers next"

He doesn't smoke cigars, but I love it when a plan comes together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmm i will have to steal *coughs* i mean emancipate a Penguin again.. starts drawing his plans for black market provisions and liberation of Laceys supplies early... as well as starting a racket on who invades which country first.

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

dont worry bussy i have contacts in the military,i was busy while youv all been away

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

OK Bussy what's my position err job

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hmmm i will have to steal *coughs* i mean emancipate a Penguin again.. starts drawing his plans for black market provisions and liberation of Laceys supplies early... as well as starting a racket on who invades which country first. "

if lacey is in charge may i suggest we start by raiding staples and whsmith ?

i think we had better stock up on paper and pencils for list making

and coloured pencils for making pretty maps

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

before we start can someone sort out him,i am not having blimming penguins again,have you any idea the price of fish!!!

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

ooo pretty maps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OK Bussy what's my position err job"

better ask lacey - she's brown owl tonight

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

Oh well I'll sit here nice and quiet then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh well I'll sit here nice and quiet then"

don't set yourself tasks you know you will fail at

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Oh well I'll sit here nice and quiet then

don't set yourself tasks you know you will fail at

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

your in charge of sabotaging gogo8,hes a sneaky little devil be careful,he will pull you in with promises of penguins and such like

good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Right, Lacey....ready for your beasting???

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

mushy be specific i cant google that

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

" Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg"

We aren't asking

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"your in charge of sabotaging gogo8,hes a sneaky little devil be careful,he will pull you in with promises of penguins and such like

good luck"

I've not got room for penguins in my garden

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg"

i am very surprised

i had imagined that link was gonna take me to 'remember you're a womble'

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

oh no testys back,i did everything you wanted last time but you went off with a bag of popcorn if i remember

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

" Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg

i am very surprised

i had imagined that link was gonna take me to 'remember you're a womble' "

Ah thats who you remind me of

Great Uncle Bulgaria

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"your in charge of sabotaging gogo8,hes a sneaky little devil be careful,he will pull you in with promises of penguins and such like

good luck

I've not got room for penguins in my garden"

can't get in for the royal doulton

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg

i am very surprised

i had imagined that link was gonna take me to 'remember you're a womble'

Ah thats who you remind me of

Great Uncle Bulgaria

wasn't he the one that watched madam cholet choke on a cream scone ?

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

that reminds me we need sarnies again.marmite all round i think

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

" Allow me to supply "our" anthem. Gotta be polite after all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAHjXUPRkg

i am very surprised

i had imagined that link was gonna take me to 'remember you're a womble'

Ah thats who you remind me of

Great Uncle Bulgaria

wasn't he the one that watched madam cholet choke on a cream scone ?

Don't think it was his cream scone she choked on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"oh no testys back,i did everything you wanted last time but you went off with a bag of popcorn if i remember

Not true, not true... I have a pussy cat to hold and stroke n everything....she is the goddess of beauty and all shall serve her, for her name is Athena...

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"that reminds me we need sarnies again.marmite all round i think

I've got scones, jam and cream

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

ooo lets try Turkey this time if we dont succeed we can all go visit that guy who keeps asking all the ladies to come over for a visit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"that reminds me we need sarnies again.marmite all round i think

ryanair i can just about cope with, but marmite ?

you stick to your lists and delegate the catering !

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

need plates and teacups as well then if we are having scones

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"ooo lets try Turkey this time if we dont succeed we can all go visit that guy who keeps asking all the ladies to come over for a visit

Will we be back by a week on Saturday I have to go on holiday, I'll check out invading Egypt and report back

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"need plates and teacups as well then if we are having scones

I've got Royal Doulton

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ooo lets try Turkey this time if we dont succeed we can all go visit that guy who keeps asking all the ladies to come over for a visit

can you drop me off in greece on the way ?

i didn't like turkey

i have paratrooper in my blood so if it's a prob, just open the hatch and fling me out

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

ok,im off to have a look at some rather fetching beige cotton for our uniforms,what its going cheap -)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ooo lets try Turkey this time if we dont succeed we can all go visit that guy who keeps asking all the ladies to come over for a visit

Will we be back by a week on Saturday I have to go on holiday, I'll check out invading Egypt and report back

by the sounds of the news tonight, there's only gonna be you there

never mind, at least you get the masseuse to urself

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"mushy be specific i cant google that"

why google it? just copy and paste into browser bar

"Baby, Baby, Can I Invade Your Country" - Sparks

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

we can go to Greece then,cant afford to loose troops this early

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ok,im off to have a look at some rather fetching beige cotton for our uniforms,what its going cheap -)"

i need darker than beige

it does nothing for my hips and arse

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"ok,im off to have a look at some rather fetching beige cotton for our uniforms,what its going cheap -)"

Can I just point out despite rumours, I hate elasticated waists

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as we don't travel by boat.....

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

"mushy be specific i cant google that

why google it? just copy and paste into browser bar

"Baby, Baby, Can I Invade Your Country" - Sparks"
you can invade my country anytime mushybut,,copy paste,your talking to someone who can just about turn on the pc

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

ok ok no lastic waists,how about a nice burgundy with cream trim

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

and i was thinking,some lovely lace up boots,thigh length of course

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ok ok no lastic waists,how about a nice burgundy with cream trim

how very gay

i approve

and if the war goes tits up at least i can pose as a bell boy whilst i make good my escape to south america

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"ok ok no lastic waists,how about a nice burgundy with cream trim

Oh nice, gold buttons?

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"and i was thinking,some lovely lace up boots,thigh length of course"

Now I would pay to see Bussy in those

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"and i was thinking,some lovely lace up boots,thigh length of course

Now I would pay to see Bussy in those

you could just be surprised one of these days

don't think i havent been keeping a beady eye on those 'boots for bbw's' threads

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"and i was thinking,some lovely lace up boots,thigh length of course

Now I would pay to see Bussy in those

you could just be surprised one of these days

don't think i havent been keeping a beady eye on those 'boots for bbw's' threads

I want thigh boots for short arses

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

gold buttons it is,and extra shiney ones for bussy lol

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

dont worry im a short arse as well,mm might have to have knee length,cant cope with chaffed thighs in the heat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"gold buttons it is,and extra shiney ones for bussy lol

and a little peak cap ?

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"dont worry im a short arse as well,mm might have to have knee length,cant cope with chaffed thighs in the heat"

Short arses rule, if that's ok with you Ma'am

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"gold buttons it is,and extra shiney ones for bussy lol

and a little peak cap ?"

Nah a balaclava, knitted by a grannie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"gold buttons it is,and extra shiney ones for bussy lol

and a little peak cap ?

Nah a balaclava, knitted by a grannie"

what and hide my rugged yet boyish good looks ? never !

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

mm might need both,depends if we go in undercover of darkness,balclava could come in usefull

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

stand easy bussy if your going to be in this mans erm womans army you will have to take orders

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

camaflage make up?

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"sorry wishy, it's looking like ryanair

have had a word with sir richard and he's not having it at all

won't let us charter a plane and can't afford tickets for us all, so unless we hijack one we're knackered

it'll be easier to just book ryanair,but make sure you print your boarding passes in advance

them surcharges could be the difference between shooting peas or mashed potato

am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

yea everyone coming to visit me

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"mm might need both,depends if we go in undercover of darkness,balclava could come in usefull"

baclava might be more useful

may i apply for in the dark under the covers duties?

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

if you dont mind ,phew was getting a bit bossy there for a minute

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"sorry wishy, it's looking like ryanair

have had a word with sir richard and he's not having it at all

won't let us charter a plane and can't afford tickets for us all, so unless we hijack one we're knackered

it'll be easier to just book ryanair,but make sure you print your boarding passes in advance

them surcharges could be the difference between shooting peas or mashed potato

am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

yea everyone coming to visit me

oh fkin ell, looks like the irish guards have been at the voddy again

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

and this cream? are you sure, really sure, it's not beige?

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

excellent idea ,who else but mushy for under cover covert ops

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"if you dont mind ,phew was getting a bit bussy there for a minute"

i'll pass on the bit of bussy if it's ok with you all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"if you dont mind ,phew was getting a bit bossy there for a minute"

i know and i liked it

good job we opted for the darker trousers after all !

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"sorry wishy, it's looking like ryanair

have had a word with sir richard and he's not having it at all

won't let us charter a plane and can't afford tickets for us all, so unless we hijack one we're knackered

it'll be easier to just book ryanair,but make sure you print your boarding passes in advance

them surcharges could be the difference between shooting peas or mashed potato

am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

yea everyone coming to visit me

oh fkin ell, looks like the irish guards have been at the voddy again

nah not on a school night

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"excellent idea ,who else but mushy for under cover covert ops

verifications this way please

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

no beige,wev decided bussys arse will look too big in it,defo cream

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

you will get youre verify when the mission is complete

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?"

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

You need more than one in charge of prisoners, don;t want any allegations of rough treatment. I volunteer

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By *awty nannaWoman
over a year ago

sheffield

I can knit balaclavas,,, and I fook...eerrrr mean cook !!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?"

i think she should be put in charge of espionage and diversionary tactics after her attempts to foil us with a stop off in antrim on our way to greece / turkey

whatever role she happens to land though, her department must be placed in the barrack furthest away from the naafi !

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?"

i'll whip everyone into shape

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

that was top secret

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

that was top secret

Well we need to tell Mushy false info, cos if he gets captured he's gonna tell everything

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

that was our secret

oops, i'm so sorry

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

i think she should be put in charge of espionage and diversionary tactics after her attempts to foil us with a stop off in antrim on our way to greece / turkey

whatever role she happens to land though, her department must be placed in the barrack furthest away from the naafi !"

have you not heard the naafi is where the new punishment department has been relocated to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed"

fkin ell lacey how many lists do you need ?

i know it's rude to ask in front of the troops but is your real surname schindler ?

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

i think she should be put in charge of espionage and diversionary tactics after her attempts to foil us with a stop off in antrim on our way to greece / turkey

whatever role she happens to land though, her department must be placed in the barrack furthest away from the naafi !

have you not heard the naafi is where the new punishment department has been relocated to

I'm in charge of scone, jam and cream

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey Mrs A, what you gonna be in charge off in this world domination?

Prisoners.

there's a rumour she's rather good at light bondage.

don't be too surprised if you haven't heard of this rumour, it's newsih

that was top secret

Well we need to tell Mushy false info, cos if he gets captured he's gonna tell everything"

indeed - i thought i recognised him

he used to be an airman in the callard & bowser adverts !

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

i could have my desk in there,kill two birds with one stone get some tips on bondage,whilst making the lists....perfect

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

"will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed

fkin ell lacey how many lists do you need ?

i know it's rude to ask in front of the troops but is your real surname schindler ?"
bussy you obviously have no idea how difficult it is being quartermaster, note to myself needs a pencil sharpener too,tut tut

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"i could have my desk in there,kill two birds with one stone get some tips on bondage,whilst making the lists....perfect

stick with me and i'll show you the ropes

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed

fkin ell lacey how many lists do you need ?

i know it's rude to ask in front of the troops but is your real surname schindler ?bussy you obviously have no idea how difficult it is being quartermaster, note to myself needs a pencil sharpener too,tut tut"

only a quarter master?

you need to enlist more carefully, i'm sure i often read of full masters on here

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed

fkin ell lacey how many lists do you need ?

well make it quick, you need to get to bed if you're up at 4 polishing knobs

i would help ya but i'm pressing my new uniform

it's lovely but am not sure about these beige shorts

when i put um on i keep getting the overwhelming urge to burst into a chorus of whispering grass

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"i could have my desk in there,kill two birds with one stone get some tips on bondage,whilst making the lists....perfect

stick to me and i'll show you the ropes

ooooh you are a tease, ready when you are

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

" only a quarter master?

you need to enlist more carefully, i'm sure i often read of full masters on here

Are they all the baters?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"will have to try and get her on board then,makes another list,more strong rope needed

fkin ell lacey how many lists do you need ?

well make it quick, you need to get to bed if you're up at 4 polishing knobs

i would help ya but i'm pressing my new uniform

it's lovely but am not sure about these beige shorts

when i put um on i keep getting the overwhelming urge to burst into a chorus of whispering grass"

Laccy not too tight

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

im in trainig not done the full exam yet

keep it quiet though dont want to alarm the troops

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?"

Nope but I can do night shift I'm good at that so long as I have a cpl guys to watch out for the boggy men

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

we'll av to do a barrack inspection first thing

'kin hell gang, well done for getting Obama on board - has anyone tried for Newt in case he gets in next time???

Lacey, hope my breastplate's still available and hasn't gone to rivet up the side of the Costa Concordia

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?"

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

Nope but I can do night shift I'm good at that so long as I have a cpl guys to watch out for the boggy men

Well we got Bussy and Mushy at the mo

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

jet been waiting for you,got you a lovely uniform and everything,and while your here could you just keep bussy in line he keeps bursting into song,,,,its not good

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'"

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"jet been waiting for you,got you a lovely uniform and everything,and while your here could you just keep bussy in line he keeps bursting into song,,,,its not good"

neither was vera lynn but it didn't do her much harm !

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

boggy men?

i'll have you know i'm fully potty trained

and in the wild, i can dig one of them sh*tting trenches (for want of the true terminology)with the best of 'em.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

cas just polishing it as we speak,no bussy not the knobs,the breastplate,

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"jet been waiting for you,got you a lovely uniform and everything,and while your here could you just keep bussy in line he keeps bursting into song,,,,its not good"

Will gag him it's fine and seeing as how got mushy as well will just gag him too

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

latrines soldier,oops best get some shovels whilst i think on

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

best make some more scones petty,got more troops coming in

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"jet been waiting for you,got you a lovely uniform and everything,and while your here could you just keep bussy in line he keeps bursting into song,,,,its not good

Will gag him it's fine and seeing as how got mushy as well will just gag him too

gee thanks.

none of that kinky leather bondage stuff i hope

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

boggy men?

i'll have you know i'm fully potty trained

and in the wild, i can dig one of them sh*tting trenches (for want of the true terminology)with the best of 'em.

Errr how did we get from boggy men or should it be boggie you know the snotty green nose stuff to shit oh yes boggy as in bog , hey I answered own question how clever am I

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"best make some more scones petty,got more troops coming in"

More scones on the way, btw any preference on jam?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

feel a quick burst of ..come and join us come and joins us,with a tambourine thrown in for the beat

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

boggy men?

i'll have you know i'm fully potty trained

and in the wild, i can dig one of them sh*tting trenches (for want of the true terminology)with the best of 'em.

Errr how did we get from boggy men or should it be boggie you know the snotty green nose stuff to shit oh yes boggy as in bog , hey I answered own question how clever am I

BOGEY

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges "

lol, top class troop entertainment

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges "

SHUT IT, said in best Sweeney voice

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

will leave that to you soldier,

although i do rather like strawberry with scones

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment"

Mushy you have no idea

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

"cas just polishing it as we speak,no bussy not the knobs,the breastplate,"

oooohh, gonna be shinier than a really shiny thing from shinington mmmmm

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

boggy men?

i'll have you know i'm fully potty trained

and in the wild, i can dig one of them sh*tting trenches (for want of the true terminology)with the best of 'em.

Errr how did we get from boggy men or should it be boggie you know the snotty green nose stuff to shit oh yes boggy as in bog , hey I answered own question how clever am I

BOGEY"

That's it

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"cas just polishing it as we speak,no bussy not the knobs,the breastplate,

oooohh, gonna be shinier than a really shiny thing from shinington mmmmm

Brasso and Silver polish at the ready

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

boggy men?

i'll have you know i'm fully potty trained

and in the wild, i can dig one of them sh*tting trenches (for want of the true terminology)with the best of 'em.

Errr how did we get from boggy men or should it be boggie you know the snotty green nose stuff to shit oh yes boggy as in bog , hey I answered own question how clever am I

BOGEY

That's it

See I do come in handy

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

back to digging latrines soldier mushy,entertainments later

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts"

Nothing to do with me, if an incident had have occured with said Privet Hedge I would have been wearing knickers, but it didn't so I could have not been

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

right

general lacey, my uniform is freshly pressed, my buttons shine like they never have before and the singing has died down

so i am off to my billet for a short repose.

i'll see you first thing for a jam scone brekkie followed by a polishing session on the parade ground.

i suggest you get some sleep too, there is a long hard battle ahead (staples have upped the security round the notepad section)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"right

general lacey, my uniform is freshly pressed, my buttons shine like they never have before and the singing has died down

so i am off to my billet for a short repose.

i'll see you first thing for a jam scone brekkie followed by a polishing session on the parade ground.

i suggest you get some sleep too, there is a long hard battle ahead (staples have upped the security round the notepad section)"

Does this mean I;m up all night baking

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts

Nothing to do with me, if an incident had have occured with said Privet Hedge I would have been wearing knickers, but it didn't so I could have not been

and will your nose have shrunk back to it's normal size before morning ?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"right

general lacey, my uniform is freshly pressed, my buttons shine like they never have before and the singing has died down

so i am off to my billet for a short repose.

i'll see you first thing for a jam scone brekkie followed by a polishing session on the parade ground.

i suggest you get some sleep too, there is a long hard battle ahead (staples have upped the security round the notepad section)

Does this mean I;m up all night baking

nah get ur head down til 3ish

i prefer my scones fresh anyway

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts

Nothing to do with me, if an incident had have occured with said Privet Hedge I would have been wearing knickers, but it didn't so I could have not been

and will your nose have shrunk back to it's normal size before morning ?"

I assure you if an incident did happen with a privet hedge I was wearing knickers

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

quartermaster, more absorbing cream material next time please

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

first job in the morning then bussy,staples,get some sleep i have an idea we will have a fight on our hands

and i have to say that uniform realy suits you

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

Permission to retire, someone wants theur scones fresh so I have to be up by three, Ma'am

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"first job in the morning then bussy,staples,get some sleep i have an idea we will have a fight on our hands

and i have to say that uniform realy suits you

especially if i wear that cap jauntily to one side

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

quartermaster, more absorbing cream material next time please "
MORE, what do you think this army is,we are running on a budget as it is,you will have to take care of your own absorbtions

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

"first job in the morning then bussy,staples,get some sleep i have an idea we will have a fight on our hands

and i have to say that uniform realy suits you

especially if i wear that cap jauntily to one side

"
your pushing it now

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts

Nothing to do with me, if an incident had have occured with said Privet Hedge I would have been wearing knickers, but it didn't so I could have not been

and will your nose have shrunk back to it's normal size before morning ?

I assure you if an incident did happen with a privet hedge I was wearing knickers"

maybe at the start, it did alledgely involve losing 'em somewhere

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

mm me thinks we can use privat hedges as a trap what does everybody think

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"Better late than never 1 moodycow reporting for duty

Do you have a note explaining your delay in getting here?

it was illegible - covered in some sort of sticky substance

the only words i could work out were 'big' 'purple' and 'ouch'

oops sorry about that got a bit carried away with the big purple 1

Remind me not to tell you about our secret plan

especially if it involves privet hedges

lol, top class troop entertainment

Mushy you have no idea

tell me something i don't know.

although i do recall the privet hedge and no knickers posts

Nothing to do with me, if an incident had have occured with said Privet Hedge I would have been wearing knickers, but it didn't so I could have not been

and will your nose have shrunk back to it's normal size before morning ?

I assure you if an incident did happen with a privet hedge I was wearing knickers

maybe at the start, it did alledgely involve losing 'em somewhere "

My knickers were intact, well they would have been if it had happened which despite what Bussy and Just say, it didn;t

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"mm me thinks we can use privat hedges as a trap what does everybody think"

Just don;t put me in charge of them, they are deadly

And with that warning Ma'am request permission to retire?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

petty,mushy,take mrs antrim with the rope and set some traps,dont forget your uniforms we dont want any flashing,it will alert the enemy

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

permission granted stand down petty

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

hmmmm, :

Sherlock : "And you say this Peti lost her knickers?"

Watson : "It would seem so."

Sherlock : "And this Bussy claims to have parachuted?"

Watson : "Indeed he has."

Sherlock : "Are you thinking what i'm thinking, more than mere coincidence?"

Watson : "No shit"

Sherlock :"And why are you painting your ass yellow?"

Watson, in a camp voice : "Lemon entry my dear man"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"permission granted stand down petty"

Ma'am, thank you Ma'am

Private Petti standing down

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"petty,mushy,take mrs antrim with the rope and set some traps,dont forget your uniforms we dont want any flashing,it will alert the enemy"

rope, mrs antrim, flashing

stood to attention ma'am

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

that leaves mrs antrim with mushy,mm can they be trusted,i do mean tie the privat up, not mushy

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

quartermaster, more absorbing cream material next time please MORE, what do you think this army is,we are running on a budget as it is,you will have to take care of your own absorbtions"

oi, the army is proffersional these days

that'll stop us meeting peeps on the way into battle.

i quite like Sussex.

i'd ask for a posting but i wouldn't trust some of these kinky BDSM types

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol"

Hey I could be the NAFFI bird again take me back to when I was 21

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *aceytop OP Woman
over a year ago

from a town near you

at ease mushy,erm no stand to attention

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

"at ease mushy,erm no stand to attention"

'shun

helmet in hand, Sir

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

OK Plain or Fruit scones?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plain with strawberry jam and clotted cream....mmmm

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol

Hey I could be the NAFFI bird again take me back to when I was 21

NAFFI bird...where were you when I was in the queue...xxx (xRN)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

s'what happens if ya leave a feckin bint in charge of sommat.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

"am a bit pissed with sir richard actually. don't know what's up with him, he's been a right narky get since kate winslet burnt his island down !

s'what happens if ya leave a feckin bint in charge of sommat.

Not like if you leave us ladies in charge eh Wishy

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

"at ease mushy,erm no stand to attention

'shun

helmet in hand, Sir "

Ahem... if you're addressing a female officer its ma'am...

... put your helmet down and report for extra duties,...

I'm sure these ladies will discipline you...

major p ervert reporting...

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol

Hey I could be the NAFFI bird again take me back to when I was 21

NAFFI bird...where were you when I was in the queue...xxx (xRN)"

I ended up with the RAF and I didn't like their uniform

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By *etillanteWoman
over a year ago

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol

Hey I could be the NAFFI bird again take me back to when I was 21

NAFFI bird...where were you when I was in the queue...xxx (xRN)

I ended up with the RAF and I didn't like their uniform

Did you mind them out of uniform

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Naafi must've been open and well stocked, we've lost Mrs Antrims privates.

Or is that Private MrsAntrim.

Unless she's been taken prisoner in which case MrA is offering £5k to keep her lol

Hey I could be the NAFFI bird again take me back to when I was 21

NAFFI bird...where were you when I was in the queue...xxx (xRN)

I ended up with the RAF and I didn't like their uniform

Did you mind them out of uniform

Was a good girl back then till I moved to Coldstream guards unit anyway

(closed, thread got too big)

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