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"Yes you can go alone It’s a social - why would you need to fancy anyone? Unsure - I’ve never been. I’ve heard they’re all very welcoming and friendly though " Maybe a silly question. Just not sure if there was any pressure. | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " Do it! I can only go on the ones I've been to, held in a pub, sometimes a separate room, other times it's been just a side area, so not totally closed off from the general public. It's just a good way to chat to people, no pressure to fancy anyone, though if that does happen, great! Course you can go alone if you're confident to do that, plenty do. It's just a good night out getting to know fellow swingers and having a laugh in a no pressure environment. I can't recommend socials enough. There's one in Chester next month, thread in forum. | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x " Thank you...... I think my mind run away with me | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? Do it! I can only go on the ones I've been to, held in a pub, sometimes a separate room, other times it's been just a side area, so not totally closed off from the general public. It's just a good way to chat to people, no pressure to fancy anyone, though if that does happen, great! Course you can go alone if you're confident to do that, plenty do. It's just a good night out getting to know fellow swingers and having a laugh in a no pressure environment. I can't recommend socials enough. There's one in Chester next month, thread in forum. " I really want to now. Just not sure I could go alone..... Need to make some friends and maybe tag along x | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error" Dressing up??? | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Dressing up??? " You're trying to make an impression. I went in jeans and tee-shirt. Everyone was in shorts and trousers and dresses (not the men) | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Dressing up??? You're trying to make an impression. I went in jeans and tee-shirt. Everyone was in shorts and trousers and dresses (not the men) " Shirts not shorts | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? Do it! I can only go on the ones I've been to, held in a pub, sometimes a separate room, other times it's been just a side area, so not totally closed off from the general public. It's just a good way to chat to people, no pressure to fancy anyone, though if that does happen, great! Course you can go alone if you're confident to do that, plenty do. It's just a good night out getting to know fellow swingers and having a laugh in a no pressure environment. I can't recommend socials enough. There's one in Chester next month, thread in forum. I really want to now. Just not sure I could go alone..... Need to make some friends and maybe tag along x" If that makes you feel more confident but there is something really empowering about walking in to something like that on your own Have you had any 1 to 1 socials yet? Maybe try and arrange a couple of those, get your confidence up a bit? | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Dressing up??? " Most people make an effort , not fancy dress , but most women dress as if it’s a night out at a club and men smart . | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Dressing up??? Most people make an effort , not fancy dress , but most women dress as if it’s a night out at a club and men smart ." Oh that’s ok then.... I wouldn’t have the confidence to turn up in my undies | |||
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"I'm interested in going to a social, if anyone knows of any in Derby let me know please." Come with me!!! | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? See if you can get on the reserve list for the Manchester lounge social in case anyone drops out. They're really friendly and lots of singles in the same boat " | |||
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"If you find one you want to go to, join in on the thread, even ask for someone to buddy you, there'll be plenty of offers. If the organisers are any good they will offer to meet you outside and introduce you to people as well. I like to get there either first or very early so I can see people arriving, rather than walking into an already full room. Just wear smart casual, as you would if you were meeting friends in the pub. If I can help in any other way feel free to pm me. " Thank you so much..... where are the meet threads?? Do you go to any around Manchester? X | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? See if you can get on the reserve list for the Manchester lounge social in case anyone drops out. They're really friendly and lots of singles in the same boat Thank you x Where do I do this? (I’m probs being dumb now lol ) " | |||
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"If you find one you want to go to, join in on the thread, even ask for someone to buddy you, there'll be plenty of offers. If the organisers are any good they will offer to meet you outside and introduce you to people as well. I like to get there either first or very early so I can see people arriving, rather than walking into an already full room. Just wear smart casual, as you would if you were meeting friends in the pub. If I can help in any other way feel free to pm me. Thank you so much..... where are the meet threads?? Do you go to any around Manchester? X" Check out the meet forum think it's down as Moriatys party and yes I'm going | |||
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"I'm interested in going to a social, if anyone knows of any in Derby let me know please. Come with me!!! " Gladly | |||
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"If you find one you want to go to, join in on the thread, even ask for someone to buddy you, there'll be plenty of offers. If the organisers are any good they will offer to meet you outside and introduce you to people as well. I like to get there either first or very early so I can see people arriving, rather than walking into an already full room. Just wear smart casual, as you would if you were meeting friends in the pub. If I can help in any other way feel free to pm me. Thank you so much..... where are the meet threads?? Do you go to any around Manchester? X" There's a forum called "meet requests and parties" or you could do a search for towns near you and see what pops up. Chester is my nearest one 1hr45m drive away, that's the only one I've been to. But after 4 times I've made some lovely friends | |||
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"If you find one you want to go to, join in on the thread, even ask for someone to buddy you, there'll be plenty of offers. If the organisers are any good they will offer to meet you outside and introduce you to people as well. I like to get there either first or very early so I can see people arriving, rather than walking into an already full room. Just wear smart casual, as you would if you were meeting friends in the pub. If I can help in any other way feel free to pm me. Thank you so much..... where are the meet threads?? Do you go to any around Manchester? X Check out the meet forum think it's down as Moriatys party and yes I'm going " Bumped it to the top of the section. You can put a message on there or PM the lounge social profile that has commented x | |||
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"I've been to loads of socials in my time on here, though not for a few years! I've been to some local one's and the couples (women won't let their man stray in case you try to snag them! so I left early) I have also been down to a few down south and had a wonderful time! And well worth the money. OP only you know what your local vicinity is like, but I am a great advocate and BTW I've been to all of them on my own, I never get why men always need someone to go with, they are just like going to the pub on your own, so go for it! " Thanks. I’d like to go with a friend just the first time I spose. | |||
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"I'd consider going to one in Leeds or Wakefield, I'll have to take a look and see what's happening " The Barnsley ones are known for being good fun and friendly | |||
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"I’ve been to quite a few socials. Even if you do fancy someone you should be doing no more than exchanging contact details. Just your fab name if you like. Just dress how you feel comfortable in a pub. Circulate and say hi to as many as you can. You’ll get Veris a plenty. Enjoy the socialising with like minded people. That’s what it’s all about. " So you go alone? X | |||
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"I'd consider going to one in Leeds or Wakefield, I'll have to take a look and see what's happening The Barnsley ones are known for being good fun and friendly" I would probably be wanting a drink or 2 to settle the nerves and Barnsley is a bit too far to get back home from | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Dressing up??? Most people make an effort , not fancy dress , but most women dress as if it’s a night out at a club and men smart ." I dress in jeans, jumper and boots if it's cold out. For a social in a pub I dress how I would for a drink with my family and friends. | |||
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"I’ve been to quite a few socials. Even if you do fancy someone you should be doing no more than exchanging contact details. Just your fab name if you like. Just dress how you feel comfortable in a pub. Circulate and say hi to as many as you can. You’ll get Veris a plenty. Enjoy the socialising with like minded people. That’s what it’s all about. So you go alone? X" I do. The people I've socialised with at the STP socials have all been lovely and down to Earth, and you don't have to wear a dress and heels. Come in a t-shirt and leggings if you want. | |||
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"I'd consider going to one in Leeds or Wakefield, I'll have to take a look and see what's happening The Barnsley ones are known for being good fun and friendly I would probably be wanting a drink or 2 to settle the nerves and Barnsley is a bit too far to get back home from" That's why people book a hotel. Well one of the reasons.... | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error" Did you turn up in your birthday suit then pal? No messing about with this one | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Did you turn up in your birthday suit then pal? No messing about with this one " I was casual... Everyone else was smart casual | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " You should attend one, they’re a great no pressure way of meeting real people and finding out if you actually fancy them. Lots attend alone and you’ll be made most welcome. If you don’t fancy any one then no problem, you’ll still meet lots of very interesting people. The group socials are the only reason we stay on the site, they’re just so enjoyable. We always treat them as an adventure | |||
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"I’ve been to quite a few socials. Even if you do fancy someone you should be doing no more than exchanging contact details. Just your fab name if you like. Just dress how you feel comfortable in a pub. Circulate and say hi to as many as you can. You’ll get Veris a plenty. Enjoy the socialising with like minded people. That’s what it’s all about. So you go alone? X" Yes. | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? You should attend one, they’re a great no pressure way of meeting real people and finding out if you actually fancy them. Lots attend alone and you’ll be made most welcome. If you don’t fancy any one then no problem, you’ll still meet lots of very interesting people. The group socials are the only reason we stay on the site, they’re just so enjoyable. We always treat them as an adventure " Thank you..... I’m definitely going to x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. " Just need to find one now that’s not full x | |||
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"I’ve been to quite a few socials. Even if you do fancy someone you should be doing no more than exchanging contact details. Just your fab name if you like. Just dress how you feel comfortable in a pub. Circulate and say hi to as many as you can. You’ll get Veris a plenty. Enjoy the socialising with like minded people. That’s what it’s all about. So you go alone? X Yes. " I’m gonna do it...... x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x" If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Did you turn up in your birthday suit then pal? No messing about with this one I was casual... Everyone else was smart casual" Only having the banter here obvs pal think you know me bi now Op socials are an amazing way to get to know fellow likemined people in a non pressurised and totally chilled out environment Couldn't recommend them enough x Must say though there's a lot of hotels booked on the night so obvs if there is lots of that clicking n sparking don't always just have to be a social if those desires and needs must jay x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local " Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x" I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it | |||
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"It was going to a social that led to having female friends on here. When I take a break from Fab I come back for the socials, not always but mostly. We had the STP on Saturday and I just loved watching people chatting to each other. In the dim and distant past there used to be lounge-based socials in clubs so those who wanted to could hook up and play. Absolutely no pressure to do anything. I had my birthday party in a club as big social - dancing, barbecue, chatting and some people having a fab time in a room together (sadly, not me). The thing I enjoyed about those socials was the getting together in the pub/hotel bar first then people going off to change into their sexy selves and then seeing them again the next morning over breakfast back in civvies." I’m so excited to go to one x | |||
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"My first social, I made the mistake of not dressing up. School boy error Did you turn up in your birthday suit then pal? No messing about with this one I was casual... Everyone else was smart casual Only having the banter here obvs pal think you know me bi now Op socials are an amazing way to get to know fellow likemined people in a non pressurised and totally chilled out environment Couldn't recommend them enough x Must say though there's a lot of hotels booked on the night so obvs if there is lots of that clicking n sparking don't always just have to be a social if those desires and needs must jay x" I’m sold! X | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " We’ve only just started going to socials. Been to a couple now, next one booked. It’s just full of normal people that happen to swing. Chat to loads. Swap fab names if you want. Swap numbers if you want. As it’s usually held in a pub it’s pretty normal apart from you’re surrounded by friendly people that actually want to talk! Lol. Just have a read on what’s on and make a jump to the unknown. Nothing ventured nothing gained etc xx no one will bite (unless you ask! Lol) x | |||
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"I’ve been to quite a few socials. Even if you do fancy someone you should be doing no more than exchanging contact details. Just your fab name if you like. Just dress how you feel comfortable in a pub. Circulate and say hi to as many as you can. You’ll get Veris a plenty. Enjoy the socialising with like minded people. That’s what it’s all about. So you go alone? X Yes. I’m gonna do it...... x" Go for it. It’s just a social so what’s there to worry about x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it " I really want to come to that one...... x | |||
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"If not already get in touch with your regions socials Pretty face like yours will be more than welcome and sure everyone will be as nice as can possibly be and welcome you into our beautiful and amazing world x" I will, thank you x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x" They hold one at fairly regular intervals there will be another MLS up soon that you can attend I'm sure. | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x They hold one at fairly regular intervals there will be another MLS up soon that you can attend I'm sure." That’s good to know, thanks | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x" People drop out.. just keep it free and I'm sure they'll let you know x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x They hold one at fairly regular intervals there will be another MLS up soon that you can attend I'm sure. That’s good to know, thanks " Just be prepared to dance naked round a open fire chanting and wailing to greek goddess Aphrodite | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol" What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??." Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying? | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying?" 29 meets you know the crack..#awkward | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying? 29 meets you know the crack..#awkward" Aliot more than 29 meets ....but no I don't so enlighten me. Where you never new on here? | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying? 29 meets you know the crack..#awkward Aliot more than 29 meets ....but no I don't so enlighten me. Where you never new on here? " Boring people like to invent imaginary drama to spice thier lives up is my take on her posts lol. Op normal person nervous about meeting a large group of strangers vs op being a secret undercover daily mail reporter she has detected!? | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying? 29 meets you know the crack..#awkward Aliot more than 29 meets ....but no I don't so enlighten me. Where you never new on here? Boring people like to invent imaginary drama to spice thier lives up is my take on her posts lol. Op normal person nervous about meeting a large group of strangers vs op being a secret undercover daily mail reporter she has detected!? " Exactly! I remember my first social. I had 101 questions but never looked back. | |||
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"I'm exactly the same very awkward lol What looking for a titivating story for the newspaper ??. Is the OP a journo or what exactly is it you are implying? 29 meets you know the crack..#awkward Aliot more than 29 meets ....but no I don't so enlighten me. Where you never new on here? Boring people like to invent imaginary drama to spice thier lives up is my take on her posts lol. Op normal person nervous about meeting a large group of strangers vs op being a secret undercover daily mail reporter she has detected!? " Thank you | |||
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"Group socials are a great way to meet up with others you've got to know from the forums, socialise and have fun - think of it as a drink in the pub with work colleagues, some of whom you don't usually have a lot to do with, and you'll not go far wrong. The biggest problem I have at them is recognising people with their clothes on!! Especially if I've not seen their face before " Haha!! X | |||
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"If not already get in touch with your regions socials Pretty face like yours will be more than welcome and sure everyone will be as nice as can possibly be and welcome you into our beautiful and amazing world x" Thank you x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x People drop out.. just keep it free and I'm sure they'll let you know x" I will. Thanks again x | |||
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"Jump in op. I always attend on my own. A good host will introduce you to a friendly face or two and help get the ball rolling. Just need to find one now that’s not full x If spaces to the Manchester one become free give me a shout. I'm local Deffo. If you know of any others you go to let me know x I've only been to one so not met that many people myself! Chatted to quite a few going to the Manchester one though so looking forward to it I really want to come to that one...... x They hold one at fairly regular intervals there will be another MLS up soon that you can attend I'm sure. That’s good to know, thanks Just be prepared to dance naked round a open fire chanting and wailing to greek goddess Aphrodite " Hahaha!! | |||
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"*waves* As Crimson has said, it’s just a bunch of folks with Fab in common, standing around, eating cake, chatting shit, having a bevvy or a brew and then being kicked out at closing time because there’s so much gossiping to do, we’ve lost track of time. The hosts of any such event will make sure you are met, introduced and included. Green arrow us to see our social threads, there’s far to much chat about cake though. " Thank you..... even better if there’s cake involved | |||
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"What fuck do you think goes on we take of all our clothes fuck a goat then sacrifice a virgin... 99% time posts like this is the University of Australia..." Yes | |||
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"Yes you can go alone It’s a social - why would you need to fancy anyone? Unsure - I’ve never been. I’ve heard they’re all very welcoming and friendly though Maybe a silly question. Just not sure if there was any pressure. " There's no pressure at all x | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x " Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie." Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint " Fuck you bitch | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Thanks!! I’ll take you up on that x Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie." | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint " Lol | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint Fuck you bitch " I really do miss you lot!!! | |||
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"We went to our first social at the end of last year and we were also very anxious about what was expected fortunately we chose the aforementioned Manchester Lounge Social as it seemed that those we speak to on the forums were attending. The hosts do a fantastic job of making you feel relaxed and so does everyone else! We couldn’t wait to put our name down for the next one!! Hopefully there will be some space for you OP as it seems it’s something you really want to do and the MLS, for us, was the perfect introduction into the group socials! Good luck Jo&D.Xx" was good wasnt it | |||
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"We went to our first social at the end of last year and we were also very anxious about what was expected fortunately we chose the aforementioned Manchester Lounge Social as it seemed that those we speak to on the forums were attending. The hosts do a fantastic job of making you feel relaxed and so does everyone else! We couldn’t wait to put our name down for the next one!! Hopefully there will be some space for you OP as it seems it’s something you really want to do and the MLS, for us, was the perfect introduction into the group socials! Good luck Jo&D.Xxwas good wasnt it " It was! We will be a little sad this time as you aren’t able to make it D. | |||
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"We went to our first social at the end of last year and we were also very anxious about what was expected fortunately we chose the aforementioned Manchester Lounge Social as it seemed that those we speak to on the forums were attending. The hosts do a fantastic job of making you feel relaxed and so does everyone else! We couldn’t wait to put our name down for the next one!! Hopefully there will be some space for you OP as it seems it’s something you really want to do and the MLS, for us, was the perfect introduction into the group socials! Good luck Jo&D.Xxwas good wasnt it It was! We will be a little sad this time as you aren’t able to make it D." na im a bloody bore compared to some folks going plus i lost my hat | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint Lol " Haha this is a good one Bladey, you have appalling time keeping skills and navigation skills, you’d never bloody get there! | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Well I’m sure you will find someone you will find attractive so that’s a check go alone I’d say meet in a public place and make sure someone knows where you are and how long you intend to be go for a coffee something like that What are people’s experiences? " | |||
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"I've been to a couple. It's best to treat it as a normal evening out, otherwise you might overthink it and won't be able to relax. Go with the flow is how I approach these things, if you do happen to meet someone you like the look of, well that's a bonus It doesn't mean you have to drag them off and five them a blowie in the car park, but you could make arrangements for another time. Good luck OP, take your time, there's no pressure and it's your rules always remember x Not read the whole thread I didn't need to this is all you need to know. Wise words indead. I go to loads and I've taken loads who just need to walk in with somebody. You see my name on a social list and wonna go just ask as I know within 10/20 mins you'll be off hopefully having a ball and I'll be Billy no mates yet again. Seriously read my veri mail if you wish no biggie. Yep. I can confirm; wannabe social slag, always ends up Billy no mates crying into a pint Fuck you bitch I really do miss you lot!!! " You to even if you do always end up lost and I have to rescue you | |||
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"Get yourself along to one ASAP girl! They really are the way to go. I've travelled over to Manchester a few times to attend the wonderful Lounge Socials hosted by SexyBrunette and MissRed (yeah yeah Moriarty... And you too ), and absolutely hate that I haven't been able to attend any of the recent ones as they are such good fun, and such a lovely relaxed way to meet people without any pressure... And if you're really lucky, someone might catch your eye and you may find yourself making plans to meet them afterwards " I think I’m going. So excited x | |||
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"We went to our first social at the end of last year and we were also very anxious about what was expected fortunately we chose the aforementioned Manchester Lounge Social as it seemed that those we speak to on the forums were attending. The hosts do a fantastic job of making you feel relaxed and so does everyone else! We couldn’t wait to put our name down for the next one!! Hopefully there will be some space for you OP as it seems it’s something you really want to do and the MLS, for us, was the perfect introduction into the group socials! Good luck Jo&D.Xx" Thank you!! Hopefully see you there xx | |||
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"Generally for big, organised socials there ends up being threads on the forums with who's going and predrinks/after parties etc worth keeping an eye out for if you're going to any V x" Thank you xx | |||
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"Hi. We've just tried to message you regarding a place at the social but can't as your filters are up. Please message us x" I’ve messaged you xxx | |||
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"Get yourself along to one ASAP girl! They really are the way to go. I've travelled over to Manchester a few times to attend the wonderful Lounge Socials hosted by SexyBrunette and MissRed (yeah yeah Moriarty... And you too ), and absolutely hate that I haven't been able to attend any of the recent ones as they are such good fun, and such a lovely relaxed way to meet people without any pressure... And if you're really lucky, someone might catch your eye and you may find yourself making plans to meet them afterwards " We've missed you! | |||
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"Get yourself along to one ASAP girl! They really are the way to go. I've travelled over to Manchester a few times to attend the wonderful Lounge Socials hosted by SexyBrunette and MissRed (yeah yeah Moriarty... And you too ), and absolutely hate that I haven't been able to attend any of the recent ones as they are such good fun, and such a lovely relaxed way to meet people without any pressure... And if you're really lucky, someone might catch your eye and you may find yourself making plans to meet them afterwards We've missed you! " I miss all 3 of you but I'd still eat a full 1 | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " Its probably better to chat ot other people going beforehand then there is someone there to welcome you on arrival but its very much down to you what you do and how long you stay there are no commitments. | |||
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"Bumping it up! Will read this tomorrow. Looks like an informative thread for social newbies " m There’s a Chester social on 16th with Chester social nw, the Manchester Lounge on 23rd and Manchester social on 30th!!! Our names are down for 16th and 23rd already! It’s a great way to meet new faces | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums " I can’t find the thread x | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x" They post it in the UK forum. Lovely people. www.fabswingers.com/forum/uk/843751 | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x" Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. " Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x" I can’t delete | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete " Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed." Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight " Yes she did. | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight Yes she did." No she didn't It was Mike rotch | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight Yes she did. No she didn't It was Mike rotch " Yes she did. Shes apologised. | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight Yes she did. No she didn't It was Mike rotch Yes she did. Shes apologised. " Mike just mentioned it was the gay village (which is huge). She mentioned the venue - which is against forum rules. Shes apologised and it's been removed. | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " I have had a couple of nice social meets. Met the lady in Costa had a coffee and got on like a house on fire. It can be a great way of meeting someone on “neutral territory “ without the pressure to play. At best you could find a playmate. We are great friends not playmates which suits us both. As long as you don’t go with an agenda or expecting play, hopefully you won’t be disappointed. I enjoy socials wether in a club or in a pub etc | |||
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"March 30 .... manchester gay village ....social ...check forums I can’t find the thread x Its best to not mention venues on the forum. Its against forum rules. Oh bugger sorry I didn’t know x I can’t delete Ive reported it so hopefully its removed. Lexi didn't mention it? White knight white knight Yes she did. No she didn't It was Mike rotch Yes she did. Shes apologised. Mike just mentioned it was the gay village (which is huge). She mentioned the venue - which is against forum rules. Shes apologised and it's been removed. " Arrrr I'm sorry then only seen the mgv and thought that was the venue | |||
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"I didnt realise. Was my mistake. Sorry again " Don't let it bother you too much l first times for everything I feel a pratt for saying it was someone else It's only fab but can see where there coming from with locations etc else you'd get every Tom dick n Harry turning up uninvited etc I suppose x Have a gawjus day | |||
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"I didnt realise. Was my mistake. Sorry again Don't let it bother you too much l first times for everything I feel a pratt for saying it was someone else It's only fab but can see where there coming from with locations etc else you'd get every Tom dick n Harry turning up uninvited etc I suppose x Have a gawjus day " I just didn’t think. Lesson learnt. | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? " We use socials prior to all meets, but just expect to be let down a lot, if you expect it and they show great, if not then hey ho their loss. But honesty we find is best, if not for you, say so | |||
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"Hi! I’m very new and it’s taken some courage to actually do this. But I’m really keen to meet new people. I’d like to to go to a social. What usually happens? Can you go alone? What if I don’t fancy anyone? What are people’s experiences? We use socials prior to all meets, but just expect to be let down a lot, if you expect it and they show great, if not then hey ho their loss. But honesty we find is best, if not for you, say so" I think the OP is speaking more about event socials, than one on one socials | |||
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"I don’t know what I had in my head " You probably had more of a party that turns into an orgy thing going through your head.. I know that was my initial thought on swinger socials. I haven't been to one, but the truth sounds much more mundane. | |||
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"For the love of God!! It took me ages to find a suitable social thread to post in. I been wondering about in many threads and they either been created by nutters or got crazies posting in them. I had totally forgotten about this thread. Finally... First of all congrats to the OP. If anyone wants to know how good socials can be contact her because she is an expert now and can't get enough of events This is why I am back in here: Friends you will remember years back when as an ordinary citizen I wondered into the scene in search of the X Factor... little did I know how exciting/addictive the Fabbing world/journey would be... good things led me to want to be more involved and share so I was using my profile as a forum. Always editing/updating it with upcoming parties/socials, where I was going and my stories on actual real events... That all stopped because I started to get more into forum threads. So here is what happened at one of the social events I attended... A group of us sitting in a lovely venue. Enjoying a chat and a very pretty, but fashionably late woman walks in. All of us turn around and look at the late comer as you do... there happened to be a spare seat next to me so she sat down. In my mind I was thinking oh here we go. Not all in a good way mind you because nobody likes a late comer coming in disturbing the peace so we get chatting... The conversation flowed nicely and we realised we have many things in common... but then... out of the blue... no warning... no nothing... she tells me "I know you... you're the chin from the forums" oh fuck!! OMFG she is one of them lurkers!! Shit!! She knew so many things... flippin heck I never been so scared in my life!! I was sat next to a feckin real life Ninja!! I used to think they were just made up to scare us... yikes!! Right, not going into more details just now because it's not safe but she confirmed there are clique groups within the forums. I know what you're thinking... tell us something we don't know because that is old news... fair enough guess what... the ninjas, lurkers, stalkers whatever have their own click on the outside looking in!! Eek!! Oh my lordy lord btw there is a difference between "click" and "clique" apparently it's because they have different turfs to do their thing... don't look at me I ain't got a clue!! I even asked how does one get into this so called "click" thingy... she said don't bother trying because I won't be welcome or allowed in... not good enough or some nonsense like that!! Holy fuck!! This has completely blown things way out in the open on a different level now Fastforward: I survived. Lived to share this. We are mates now, but only barely because she thinks I ain't as funny as her. We all know I am fucking hilarious so she is well out of order. Apparently her inner lioness likes to come out and hunt... all that roar roar Leo malarkey... what the fuck does the universe know anyway!! Scorpios maybe horny folk, but we are good people. Plus sexercise is as good as any exercise to get the heart pumping... beating faster... Why can't I be part of a clique/click group/cult !! Oh forget it. Fine. I will just have to carry on doing my own thing and somehow survive ha ha For those still never been to a social: Do it. Trust me. Attend one of your local ones or contact any organisers of the well known bigger events around the UK. You have nothing to lose and potentially everything to gain. Well a friend or two or more... socialise and you never know when a surprise could be waiting for you." . so just how much have you done tonight | |||
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"For the love of God!! It took me ages to find a suitable social thread to post in. I been wondering about in many threads and they either been created by nutters or got crazies posting in them. I had totally forgotten about this thread. Finally... First of all congrats to the OP. If anyone wants to know how good socials can be contact her because she is an expert now and can't get enough of events This is why I am back in here: Friends you will remember years back when as an ordinary citizen I wondered into the scene in search of the X Factor... little did I know how exciting/addictive the Fabbing world/journey would be... good things led me to want to be more involved and share so I was using my profile as a forum. Always editing/updating it with upcoming parties/socials, where I was going and my stories on actual real events... That all stopped because I started to get more into forum threads. So here is what happened at one of the social events I attended... A group of us sitting in a lovely venue. Enjoying a chat and a very pretty, but fashionably late woman walks in. All of us turn around and look at the late comer as you do... there happened to be a spare seat next to me so she sat down. In my mind I was thinking oh here we go. Not all in a good way mind you because nobody likes a late comer coming in disturbing the peace so we get chatting... The conversation flowed nicely and we realised we have many things in common... but then... out of the blue... no warning... no nothing... she tells me "I know you... you're the chin from the forums" oh fuck!! OMFG she is one of them lurkers!! Shit!! She knew so many things... flippin heck I never been so scared in my life!! I was sat next to a feckin real life Ninja!! I used to think they were just made up to scare us... yikes!! Right, not going into more details just now because it's not safe but she confirmed there are clique groups within the forums. I know what you're thinking... tell us something we don't know because that is old news... fair enough guess what... the ninjas, lurkers, stalkers whatever have their own click on the outside looking in!! Eek!! Oh my lordy lord btw there is a difference between "click" and "clique" apparently it's because they have different turfs to do their thing... don't look at me I ain't got a clue!! I even asked how does one get into this so called "click" thingy... she said don't bother trying because I won't be welcome or allowed in... not good enough or some nonsense like that!! Holy fuck!! This has completely blown things way out in the open on a different level now Fastforward: I survived. Lived to share this. We are mates now, but only barely because she thinks I ain't as funny as her. We all know I am fucking hilarious so she is well out of order. Apparently her inner lioness likes to come out and hunt... all that roar roar Leo malarkey... what the fuck does the universe know anyway!! Scorpios maybe horny folk, but we are good people. Plus sexercise is as good as any exercise to get the heart pumping... beating faster... Why can't I be part of a clique/click group/cult !! Oh forget it. Fine. I will just have to carry on doing my own thing and somehow survive ha ha For those still never been to a social: Do it. Trust me. Attend one of your local ones or contact any organisers of the well known bigger events around the UK. You have nothing to lose and potentially everything to gain. Well a friend or two or more... socialise and you never know when a surprise could be waiting for you." Adam there isn’t a clique. There are friends who have met and/or chat. It’s easy to call it a clique with a derogatory accusatory edge which feeds peoples paranoia but basically the site will always be what you make of it. There will always be groups of friends and if you don’t make it into that group then that’s life. I will continue to do my own things in my own way with people I get along with, irrespective of what others have to say. Mind you, you know all this because I’ve told you before | |||
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"Adam there isn’t a clique. There are friends who have met and/or chat. It’s easy to call it a clique with a derogatory accusatory edge which feeds peoples paranoia but basically the site will always be what you make of it. There will always be groups of friends and if you don’t make it into that group then that’s life. I will continue to do my own things in my own way with people I get along with, irrespective of what others have to say. Mind you, you know all this because I’ve told you before " Blimey, did I post that last night!? I'm glad you have posted Babs because you're not part of the clique and you're one of the ones that has been consistent over the years in your views/opinions. That is why we are connected and get on well on here my post was not aimed at any specific groups or forumites that as you say have met/chat and are friends. As you're aware I have many groups of friends across Fab so I totally get that. I often get accused of being a forumite myself by cheeky buggers! The bit about lurkers/click that was a joke I shared because I know some of the social attendees I have met would have giggled at reading that. Having said that I was going to post on the "clique" topic at a later date, but you mentioned some interesting points so I am going to do that now as my final post in this thread. Some of the regular forum posters try to put people down or brush it aside when anyone mentions "clique" it appears to be a sensitive topic and for good reason... yes people do get jealous or try to be spiteful with a "derogatory accusatory edge" as you said, but I am not one of them. And because the way I am I say it exactly how it is not just being "selective" or turning a blind eye. Mates or no mates if it's wrong and I witness it I will call it out especially if the clique try to push/drive people out... So here is my definition of "clique" and this is exactly what people mean when they mention it. Not to be confused by groups of friends enjoying friendly banter within the forums or otherwise... A "clique" is when people will join together in 3s, 4s, 5s (there is no max number) I once witnessed at least 20 people! I don't exaggerate. They will jump on an individual(s) and either troll them or persistently quote their posts to bring them down. It becomes like a gang. Online bullies. This happens and I stand by that. That is what the surprise conversation was I had at a social. Just because some choose to turn a blind eye or pretend it ain't true that does occur therefore "clique" exist. Finally I am going to add another point. There are people within the forums that are waiting to "pounce" on individual(s) in a negative way, isolate them because for whatever reason they don't like them or see them as a threat or because who they are friends with. So they wait for them to slip up even with posting a particular "word" and next thing you know 3, 4, 5+ have latched onto it to cause problems. As someone who has been to socials/events all over the UK for years on here I can vouch for them and always recommend/encourage people to attend because in my experience 99% is all good fun. Like with anything nothing is perfect therefore the 1% can be the negative individual(s). That is life. The OP of this thread is a prime example of how to do it. I remember coming in here weeks ago when she created the thread as someone looking into getting to socials. Fastforward to today and she enjoyed/loved the experience. That is what you call a happy ending Right, I better get a wiggle on! Have a great weekend everyone. Over and out for now | |||
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"Adam there isn’t a clique. There are friends who have met and/or chat. It’s easy to call it a clique with a derogatory accusatory edge which feeds peoples paranoia but basically the site will always be what you make of it. There will always be groups of friends and if you don’t make it into that group then that’s life. I will continue to do my own things in my own way with people I get along with, irrespective of what others have to say. Mind you, you know all this because I’ve told you before Blimey, did I post that last night!? I'm glad you have posted Babs because you're not part of the clique and you're one of the ones that has been consistent over the years in your views/opinions. That is why we are connected and get on well on here my post was not aimed at any specific groups or forumites that as you say have met/chat and are friends. As you're aware I have many groups of friends across Fab so I totally get that. I often get accused of being a forumite myself by cheeky buggers! The bit about lurkers/click that was a joke I shared because I know some of the social attendees I have met would have giggled at reading that. Having said that I was going to post on the "clique" topic at a later date, but you mentioned some interesting points so I am going to do that now as my final post in this thread. Some of the regular forum posters try to put people down or brush it aside when anyone mentions "clique" it appears to be a sensitive topic and for good reason... yes people do get jealous or try to be spiteful with a "derogatory accusatory edge" as you said, but I am not one of them. And because the way I am I say it exactly how it is not just being "selective" or turning a blind eye. Mates or no mates if it's wrong and I witness it I will call it out especially if the clique try to push/drive people out... So here is my definition of "clique" and this is exactly what people mean when they mention it. Not to be confused by groups of friends enjoying friendly banter within the forums or otherwise... A "clique" is when people will join together in 3s, 4s, 5s (there is no max number) I once witnessed at least 20 people! I don't exaggerate. They will jump on an individual(s) and either troll them or persistently quote their posts to bring them down. It becomes like a gang. Online bullies. This happens and I stand by that. That is what the surprise conversation was I had at a social. Just because some choose to turn a blind eye or pretend it ain't true that does occur therefore "clique" exist. Finally I am going to add another point. There are people within the forums that are waiting to "pounce" on individual(s) in a negative way, isolate them because for whatever reason they don't like them or see them as a threat or because who they are friends with. So they wait for them to slip up even with posting a particular "word" and next thing you know 3, 4, 5+ have latched onto it to cause problems. As someone who has been to socials/events all over the UK for years on here I can vouch for them and always recommend/encourage people to attend because in my experience 99% is all good fun. Like with anything nothing is perfect therefore the 1% can be the negative individual(s). That is life. The OP of this thread is a prime example of how to do it. I remember coming in here weeks ago when she created the thread as someone looking into getting to socials. Fastforward to today and she enjoyed/loved the experience. That is what you call a happy ending Right, I better get a wiggle on! Have a great weekend everyone. Over and out for now " I am with you on this Adam. I actually experienced five years ago being on the end of such a ganging up process when I challenged the ‘pack of wolves’ approach to dealing with people who hadn’t understood the unwritten rules of forum posting and had ventured into what became known as fabicide territory. By doing so as realised I had committed fabicide myself. Experiences like that and a few similar ones caused me to hide my profile for 8 months and rethink my forum presence. I came back because the forum has also been a wonderfully supportive place for me to work out, who I am as a sexual being and what that meant for life outside of Fab and have made some genuinely beautiful online friends who I am still yet to meet socially or otherwise. I have never attended a social but a I will get round to it, in the meantime the more we can, as another friend says ‘be excellent to each other’ the more this place will thrive. | |||
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"Adam there isn’t a clique. There are friends who have met and/or chat. It’s easy to call it a clique with a derogatory accusatory edge which feeds peoples paranoia but basically the site will always be what you make of it. There will always be groups of friends and if you don’t make it into that group then that’s life. I will continue to do my own things in my own way with people I get along with, irrespective of what others have to say. Mind you, you know all this because I’ve told you before Blimey, did I post that last night!? I'm glad you have posted Babs because you're not part of the clique and you're one of the ones that has been consistent over the years in your views/opinions. That is why we are connected and get on well on here my post was not aimed at any specific groups or forumites that as you say have met/chat and are friends. As you're aware I have many groups of friends across Fab so I totally get that. I often get accused of being a forumite myself by cheeky buggers! The bit about lurkers/click that was a joke I shared because I know some of the social attendees I have met would have giggled at reading that. Having said that I was going to post on the "clique" topic at a later date, but you mentioned some interesting points so I am going to do that now as my final post in this thread. Some of the regular forum posters try to put people down or brush it aside when anyone mentions "clique" it appears to be a sensitive topic and for good reason... yes people do get jealous or try to be spiteful with a "derogatory accusatory edge" as you said, but I am not one of them. And because the way I am I say it exactly how it is not just being "selective" or turning a blind eye. Mates or no mates if it's wrong and I witness it I will call it out especially if the clique try to push/drive people out... So here is my definition of "clique" and this is exactly what people mean when they mention it. Not to be confused by groups of friends enjoying friendly banter within the forums or otherwise... A "clique" is when people will join together in 3s, 4s, 5s (there is no max number) I once witnessed at least 20 people! I don't exaggerate. They will jump on an individual(s) and either troll them or persistently quote their posts to bring them down. It becomes like a gang. Online bullies. This happens and I stand by that. That is what the surprise conversation was I had at a social. Just because some choose to turn a blind eye or pretend it ain't true that does occur therefore "clique" exist. Finally I am going to add another point. There are people within the forums that are waiting to "pounce" on individual(s) in a negative way, isolate them because for whatever reason they don't like them or see them as a threat or because who they are friends with. So they wait for them to slip up even with posting a particular "word" and next thing you know 3, 4, 5+ have latched onto it to cause problems. As someone who has been to socials/events all over the UK for years on here I can vouch for them and always recommend/encourage people to attend because in my experience 99% is all good fun. Like with anything nothing is perfect therefore the 1% can be the negative individual(s). That is life. The OP of this thread is a prime example of how to do it. I remember coming in here weeks ago when she created the thread as someone looking into getting to socials. Fastforward to today and she enjoyed/loved the experience. That is what you call a happy ending Right, I better get a wiggle on! Have a great weekend everyone. Over and out for now I am with you on this Adam. I actually experienced five years ago being on the end of such a ganging up process when I challenged the ‘pack of wolves’ approach to dealing with people who hadn’t understood the unwritten rules of forum posting and had ventured into what became known as fabicide territory. By doing so as realised I had committed fabicide myself. Experiences like that and a few similar ones caused me to hide my profile for 8 months and rethink my forum presence. I came back because the forum has also been a wonderfully supportive place for me to work out, who I am as a sexual being and what that meant for life outside of Fab and have made some genuinely beautiful online friends who I am still yet to meet socially or otherwise. I have never attended a social but a I will get round to it, in the meantime the more we can, as another friend says ‘be excellent to each other’ the more this place will thrive." What is fabicide? I'm pretty sure I do it every time I post. People have still been nice to me at socials though. You should try one, they're good. | |||
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"Wow!! What can happen in 5 weeks!!! I’ve now done a big social and tonight is my first party!!! " Have a fantastic time Lexi | |||
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"Adam there isn’t a clique. There are friends who have met and/or chat. It’s easy to call it a clique with a derogatory accusatory edge which feeds peoples paranoia but basically the site will always be what you make of it. There will always be groups of friends and if you don’t make it into that group then that’s life. I will continue to do my own things in my own way with people I get along with, irrespective of what others have to say. Mind you, you know all this because I’ve told you before Blimey, did I post that last night!? I'm glad you have posted Babs because you're not part of the clique and you're one of the ones that has been consistent over the years in your views/opinions. That is why we are connected and get on well on here my post was not aimed at any specific groups or forumites that as you say have met/chat and are friends. As you're aware I have many groups of friends across Fab so I totally get that. I often get accused of being a forumite myself by cheeky buggers! The bit about lurkers/click that was a joke I shared because I know some of the social attendees I have met would have giggled at reading that. Having said that I was going to post on the "clique" topic at a later date, but you mentioned some interesting points so I am going to do that now as my final post in this thread. Some of the regular forum posters try to put people down or brush it aside when anyone mentions "clique" it appears to be a sensitive topic and for good reason... yes people do get jealous or try to be spiteful with a "derogatory accusatory edge" as you said, but I am not one of them. And because the way I am I say it exactly how it is not just being "selective" or turning a blind eye. Mates or no mates if it's wrong and I witness it I will call it out especially if the clique try to push/drive people out... So here is my definition of "clique" and this is exactly what people mean when they mention it. Not to be confused by groups of friends enjoying friendly banter within the forums or otherwise... A "clique" is when people will join together in 3s, 4s, 5s (there is no max number) I once witnessed at least 20 people! I don't exaggerate. They will jump on an individual(s) and either troll them or persistently quote their posts to bring them down. It becomes like a gang. Online bullies. This happens and I stand by that. That is what the surprise conversation was I had at a social. Just because some choose to turn a blind eye or pretend it ain't true that does occur therefore "clique" exist. Finally I am going to add another point. There are people within the forums that are waiting to "pounce" on individual(s) in a negative way, isolate them because for whatever reason they don't like them or see them as a threat or because who they are friends with. So they wait for them to slip up even with posting a particular "word" and next thing you know 3, 4, 5+ have latched onto it to cause problems. As someone who has been to socials/events all over the UK for years on here I can vouch for them and always recommend/encourage people to attend because in my experience 99% is all good fun. Like with anything nothing is perfect therefore the 1% can be the negative individual(s). That is life. The OP of this thread is a prime example of how to do it. I remember coming in here weeks ago when she created the thread as someone looking into getting to socials. Fastforward to today and she enjoyed/loved the experience. That is what you call a happy ending Right, I better get a wiggle on! Have a great weekend everyone. Over and out for now I am with you on this Adam. I actually experienced five years ago being on the end of such a ganging up process when I challenged the ‘pack of wolves’ approach to dealing with people who hadn’t understood the unwritten rules of forum posting and had ventured into what became known as fabicide territory. By doing so as realised I had committed fabicide myself. Experiences like that and a few similar ones caused me to hide my profile for 8 months and rethink my forum presence. I came back because the forum has also been a wonderfully supportive place for me to work out, who I am as a sexual being and what that meant for life outside of Fab and have made some genuinely beautiful online friends who I am still yet to meet socially or otherwise. I have never attended a social but a I will get round to it, in the meantime the more we can, as another friend says ‘be excellent to each other’ the more this place will thrive. What is fabicide? I'm pretty sure I do it every time I post. People have still been nice to me at socials though. You should try one, they're good. " Fabicide was a made up term describe the action of posting a thread where a pack wolves roasted you. As if you were dead to the Fab world even though only a small proportion of the site use the forum. It’s a myth. As for going to an organised social I’ll get round to one eventually. In the meantime I’ll happily meet at a convenient time for coffee and chinwag on a one-to-one or small group basis. | |||
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