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Make me smile

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull

It's been a tough old week so i would appreciate any attempts to make me smile.

A joke,photos of boobies, anything might help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should shag a seedless watermelon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should shag a seedless watermelon

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull

Sammy took his blonde blind date to a seaside carnival. 'What would you like to do first, Kim?' asked Sammy. 'I want to get weighed,' she said.

They ambled over to the weight guesser, who guessed 70 kg. Kim got on the scale and it read 67 kg and she won a prize.

Next the couple went on the ferris wheel. When the ride was over, Sammy again asked Kim what she wanted to do next. 'I want to get weighed,' she said. Back to the weight guesser they went and because she'd been there before the man guessed Kim's correct weight and Sammy lost his dollar.

Kim and Sammy walked around the carnival and again he asked, 'Where to next?' Kim responded: 'I want to get weighed,' but by this time Sammy figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her flatmate, Laura, asked Kim about her blind date, 'How'd it go?' she asked. Kim said, 'Oh, Waura, it was wousy

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"You should shag a seedless watermelon "

Do I warm it up first ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ? "

Depends on your level of horniness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness "

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?"

Depends on your level of healthiness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?

Depends on your level of healthiness "

Are some melons healthier than others then?

Is a melon not just a melon?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?

Depends on your level of healthiness

Are some melons healthier than others then?

Is a melon not just a melon?"

Depends on the level of sun it had received

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?

Depends on your level of healthiness

Are some melons healthier than others then?

Is a melon not just a melon?

Depends on the level of sun it had received "

It would appear there is more to shagging melons then I first realised!

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull

I tried it but It's only given me a temporary smile,

I asked the melon to marry me after but she said she can't cantaloupe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You should shag a seedless watermelon

Do I warm it up first ?

Depends on your level of horniness

Does it have to be a watermelon or would any melon suffice?

Depends on your level of healthiness

Are some melons healthier than others then?

Is a melon not just a melon?

Depends on the level of sun it had received

It would appear there is more to shagging melons then I first realised!"

Depends on your level of understanding

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull

I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tried it but It's only given me a temporary smile,

I asked the melon to marry me after but she said she can't cantaloupe "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ? "

You are on fire

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tried it but It's only given me a temporary smile,

I asked the melon to marry me after but she said she can't cantaloupe "

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire "

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one "

Have you try to shag an avocado ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one "

I have a nice ripe one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

Have you try to shag an avocado ? "

I thought about suggesting an avocado however the stone might get in the way.

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By *layful HarlequinMan
over a year ago

iver heath

How do you find will Smith in the snow ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How do you find will Smith in the snow ???? "

I don't know? how do you find Will Smith in the snow!

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By *layful HarlequinMan
over a year ago

iver heath


"How do you find will Smith in the snow ????

I don't know? how do you find Will Smith in the snow!"

Look for the fresh prints

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How do you find will Smith in the snow ????

I don't know? how do you find Will Smith in the snow!

Look for the fresh prints "

I like that one a lot!

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By *layfullsam OP   Man
over a year ago

Solihull


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

Have you try to shag an avocado ?

I thought about suggesting an avocado however the stone might get in the way."

What are you trying to say ?

It's a bit small ! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

Have you try to shag an avocado ?

I thought about suggesting an avocado however the stone might get in the way.

What are you trying to say ?

It's a bit small ! lol"

this is the other reason why I wasn't going to suggest that avocado.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

Have you try to shag an avocado ?

I thought about suggesting an avocado however the stone might get in the way.

What are you trying to say ?

It's a bit small ! lol

this is the other reason why I wasn't going to suggest that avocado. "

I only mentioned it because my gp said it was the right thing to do

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By *layful HarlequinMan
over a year ago

iver heath


"How do you find will Smith in the snow ????

I don't know? how do you find Will Smith in the snow!

Look for the fresh prints

I like that one a lot! "

good x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sammy took his blonde blind date to a seaside carnival. 'What would you like to do first, Kim?' asked Sammy. 'I want to get weighed,' she said.

They ambled over to the weight guesser, who guessed 70 kg. Kim got on the scale and it read 67 kg and she won a prize.

Next the couple went on the ferris wheel. When the ride was over, Sammy again asked Kim what she wanted to do next. 'I want to get weighed,' she said. Back to the weight guesser they went and because she'd been there before the man guessed Kim's correct weight and Sammy lost his dollar.

Kim and Sammy walked around the carnival and again he asked, 'Where to next?' Kim responded: 'I want to get weighed,' but by this time Sammy figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her flatmate, Laura, asked Kim about her blind date, 'How'd it go?' she asked. Kim said, 'Oh, Waura, it was wousy"
Am i the only one not obsessed with watermelon and found this funny!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sammy took his blonde blind date to a seaside carnival. 'What would you like to do first, Kim?' asked Sammy. 'I want to get weighed,' she said.

They ambled over to the weight guesser, who guessed 70 kg. Kim got on the scale and it read 67 kg and she won a prize.

Next the couple went on the ferris wheel. When the ride was over, Sammy again asked Kim what she wanted to do next. 'I want to get weighed,' she said. Back to the weight guesser they went and because she'd been there before the man guessed Kim's correct weight and Sammy lost his dollar.

Kim and Sammy walked around the carnival and again he asked, 'Where to next?' Kim responded: 'I want to get weighed,' but by this time Sammy figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her flatmate, Laura, asked Kim about her blind date, 'How'd it go?' she asked. Kim said, 'Oh, Waura, it was wousy Am i the only one not obsessed with watermelon and found this funny!!"

I laughed too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm tempted to act out a three some with two melons but would that make it a pear ?

You are on fire

Bloody friction from the melon, I need a riper one

Have you try to shag an avocado ?

I thought about suggesting an avocado however the stone might get in the way.

What are you trying to say ?

It's a bit small ! lol

this is the other reason why I wasn't going to suggest that avocado.

I only mentioned it because my gp said it was the right thing to do "

Your GP told you to shag an avocado!!!

I think you might need to check that he/she is actually a proper GP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Paddy is at Mick’s house

“Mick shall i make a coffee”?

“Yes, white no sugar”, says Mick

Paddy opens the fridge door and sees an empty bottle of milk next to a full one

“Mick! Why do you have an empty bottle of milk in your fridge”?

“ It’s in case anyone wants a black coffee you thick git”!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does sticking your cock in a watermelon make it a horned melon?

#Melonology

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you cheat on your watermelon with a honeydew does that make it a bitter melon?

#Melonology

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sammy took his blonde blind date to a seaside carnival. 'What would you like to do first, Kim?' asked Sammy. 'I want to get weighed,' she said.

They ambled over to the weight guesser, who guessed 70 kg. Kim got on the scale and it read 67 kg and she won a prize.

Next the couple went on the ferris wheel. When the ride was over, Sammy again asked Kim what she wanted to do next. 'I want to get weighed,' she said. Back to the weight guesser they went and because she'd been there before the man guessed Kim's correct weight and Sammy lost his dollar.

Kim and Sammy walked around the carnival and again he asked, 'Where to next?' Kim responded: 'I want to get weighed,' but by this time Sammy figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her flatmate, Laura, asked Kim about her blind date, 'How'd it go?' she asked. Kim said, 'Oh, Waura, it was wousy Am i the only one not obsessed with watermelon and found this funny!!

I laughed too "

So you did but you are obviously another watermelon enthusiast

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