FabSwingers.com forum: Avast! Ye Scurvy Dogs.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/19 11:42:26]

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By *oney to the beeWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

I presume you will all be rodgering the cabin boy then.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Aye captain...I'm handy with a cutlass (aka potato peeler) and look good in an eyepatch.

I'll join your crew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Shiver me timbers!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I presume you will all be rodgering the cabin boy then.

No.. I prefer older ones myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Aye captain...I'm handy with a cutlass (aka potato peeler) and look good in an eyepatch.

I'll join your crew "

Sweet.. You can be First Mate.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seaman Stains reporting for duty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ll pull on the rigging and hoist the sails

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

I'm sorry, I fucked up! Hazard of having x2 profiles. I'm not allowed to use first in forum and can't delete the thread. So i'll run with it and hope Moderator sees it as a genuine, easy made mistake.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ll pull on the rigging and hoist the sails "

Ok.. you can be Master of the Rigging

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Always have Rum, what kind of Pirate Queen would I be without Rum? My Willy is my magic compass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will be the ship ho

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will be the ship ho "

Ummm.. That's the Captains Job! Puck another

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I’ll man the guns - let’s sink the salty land lovers!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ll man the guns - let’s sink the salty land lovers! "

Master Gunner you are.. I'm relying on you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines"

I can swab the decks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will be the ship ho

Ummm.. That's the Captains Job! Puck another

"
Cixi your such a boner killer

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By *ickygirl41Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Shiver me timbers! "

There's a joinery company in Glasgow called that

It's not talk like a pirate day? That's in September.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

I can swab the decks"

Of Semen? I imagine you'll need a few buckets on this boat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Shiver me timbers!

There's a joinery company in Glasgow called that

It's not talk like a pirate day? That's in September....."

Every day is International Talk Like A Pirate for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I will be the ship ho

Ummm.. That's the Captains Job! Puck another

Cixi your such a boner killer

I'm good like that

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By *ot-AshMan
over a year ago

London

I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

I can swab the decks

Of Semen? I imagine you'll need a few buckets on this boat"

Can't get the Captain Pugwash theme out of my head now!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink..."

Most important role on the ship after Captain.. You better be good. Captain likes the Spiced Variety.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command."

Confused.com how come you're shorter on this profile than your other one..oh and bi as opposed to straight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

I can swab the decks

Of Semen? I imagine you'll need a few buckets on this boat

Can't get the Captain Pugwash theme out of my head now!!"

Walk the plank *Raises a cutlass to your throat and flintlock pistol at your gonads*

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I hate to be a pain but one of my practice shots has just made a bloody great hole in the hull, port side....

Do we have a repair kit and emergency carpenter on board?

Sorry about that....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command.

Confused.com how come you're shorter on this profile than your other one..oh and bi as opposed to straight

I've answered that enough on here, press my green arrow to find out. This is a pirate thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command.

Confused.com how come you're shorter on this profile than your other one..oh and bi as opposed to straight

I've answered that enough on here, press my green arrow to find out. This is a pirate thread. "

So you’re the OP?

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

There were two women pirates back in the day, Anne Bonny and Mary Read. Mary dressed as a man as women were meant to be unlucky on ships.

There ends the history lesson me hearties

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate to be a pain but one of my practice shots has just made a bloody great hole in the hull, port side....

Do we have a repair kit and emergency carpenter on board?

Sorry about that....

You fucking dickhead! My beautiful ship! You're demoted to an ordinary Gunner now! Start Bailing! We've no chippies yet!

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By *ubenesque.Woman
over a year ago

over by there

I'm quite handy with rope, can I come aboard?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command.

Confused.com how come you're shorter on this profile than your other one..oh and bi as opposed to straight

I've answered that enough on here, press my green arrow to find out. This is a pirate thread.

So you’re the OP?

Ummm.. no... maybe.. you can't prove anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

I can swab the decks

Of Semen? I imagine you'll need a few buckets on this boat

Can't get the Captain Pugwash theme out of my head now!!

Walk the plank *Raises a cutlass to your throat and flintlock pistol at your gonads*"

Arrrrhh…. that is so unfair Cap'n….

*Whistles to the tune of Frigging in the Rigging*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There were two women pirates back in the day, Anne Bonny and Mary Read. Mary dressed as a man as women were meant to be unlucky on ships.

There ends the history lesson me hearties"

Where doth thou thinketh one draweth inspiration?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Stains reporting for duty

What job do you want Mr. Staines

I can swab the decks

Of Semen? I imagine you'll need a few buckets on this boat

Can't get the Captain Pugwash theme out of my head now!!

Walk the plank *Raises a cutlass to your throat and flintlock pistol at your gonads*

Arrrrhh…. that is so unfair Cap'n….

*Whistles to the tune of Frigging in the Rigging*"

Forgiven.. Get bailing.. We're sinking! Master Gunner blew a hole in the boat. You're no longer my least favourite crew member!

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By *ot-AshMan
over a year ago

London

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink...

Most important role on the ship after Captain.. You better be good. Captain likes the Spiced Variety."

I'm the best bar man in the pirate world.

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By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

Any volunteers to kiss the golden rivet yet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm quite handy with rope, can I come aboard?

Bienvenido. It'd be better if you're handy with a bucket right now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink...

Most important role on the ship after Captain.. You better be good. Captain likes the Spiced Variety.

I'm the best bar man in the pirate world.

Time will tell.

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By *ubenesque.Woman
over a year ago

over by there

"I'm quite handy with rope, can I come aboard?

Bienvenido. It'd be better if you're handy with a bucket right now

Bailing out as I type cap'n

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink...

Most important role on the ship after Captain.. You better be good. Captain likes the Spiced Variety.

I'm the best bar man in the pirate world.

Time will tell."

Where is my Cubra Libre? Why is my Hook empty?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm quite handy with rope, can I come aboard?

Bienvenido. It'd be better if you're handy with a bucket right now

Bailing out as I type cap'n"

Good lass, ye'll go far

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buckets, buckets.....we need more feckin' buckets!!

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Good news: I’ve managed to plug the hole with a barrel

The bad news: It’s a gun powder barrel so I’d heartily recommend not to smoke near it anyone....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any volunteers to kiss the golden rivet yet?"

You can kiss my golden rivet if you don't fix that hole in the ship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ummm.. I'm the one who has the ship really.. dunno what he's on about!

I'm the Captain and I need a crew.

Who is in?

Blimey I'm confused already.

Do you have a compass and rum?

Ah ok, I'm still in.

I might not be.. once Mod see's it

If this is the case, you may assume Command.

Confused.com how come you're shorter on this profile than your other one..oh and bi as opposed to straight

I've answered that enough on here, press my green arrow to find out. This is a pirate thread.

So you’re the OP?

Ummm.. no... maybe.. you can't prove anything."

Ay?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good news: I’ve managed to plug the hole with a barrel

The bad news: It’s a gun powder barrel so I’d heartily recommend not to smoke near it anyone.... "

*Captain Cixi's furrowed brow of concern mixes with uneasy, temporary relief*

I'll stuff you in it, if you don't board it up soon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rubs hands together *interesting.

Im good with wood?

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By *ynetaurusMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Seaman Staines here willing to sign on but note no experience the only ship I have known is Hardship...Thats my two penny worth of Nautycal nonsense.Disembarking now x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rubs hands together *interesting.

Im good with wood?"

Get.. fixing the hole in the side. At last we have.. someone good with "Wood".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Staines here willing to sign on but note no experience the only ship I have known is Hardship...Thats my two penny worth of Nautycal nonsense.Disembarking now x"

Feck off.... I'm Seaman Staines

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Staines here willing to sign on but note no experience the only ship I have known is Hardship...Thats my two penny worth of Nautycal nonsense.Disembarking now x"

We have a Seaman Stains already. Are you his Brother?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seaman Staines here willing to sign on but note no experience the only ship I have known is Hardship...Thats my two penny worth of Nautycal nonsense.Disembarking now x

Feck off.... I'm Seaman Staines

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I presume you will all be rodgering the cabin boy then.

I'll be rogering everyone

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Captain! - There’s rats below decks ‘ere!

.....Do we have any BBQ sauce to compliment them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Captain! - There’s rats below decks ‘ere!

.....Do we have any BBQ sauce to compliment them? "

.... Yes! We also have Honey Mustard. I like mine "Crispy" Well spotted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll be the Loblolly Boy.

(That's what the Surgeon's Assistant was called).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll be the Loblolly Boy.

(That's what the Surgeon's Assistant was called)."

You'd best find us a Surgeon you can assist fast then.. or you're getting promoted. Hurry, I need my daily bed bath soon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't have scurvy. I eat lots of vitamin c.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't have scurvy. I eat lots of vitamin c.

Then you ain't one of us then. Yellow skinned, sullen eyed pirates only I'm afraid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/19 12:41:25]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was on the good ship Venus

By Christ, ya shoulda seen us

The figurehead was a whore in bed

And the mast, a mammoth penis

The captain of this lugger

He was a dirty bugger

He wasn't fit to shovel shit

From one place to another

[Chorus:]

Friggin' in the riggin'

There was fuck all else to do

The captain's name was Morgan

By Christ, he was a gorgon

Ten times a day he'd stop and play

With his fuckin' organ

The first mate's name was Cooper

By Christ he was a trooper.

He jerked and jerked until he worked

Himself into a stupor

[Chorus]

The second mate was Andy

By Christ, he had a dandy

Till they crushed his cock on a jagged rock

For cumming in the brandy

The cabin boy was Flipper

He was a fuckin' nipper

He stuffed his ass with broken glass

And circumcised the skipper

[Chorus]

The Captain's wife was Mabel

To fuck she was not able

So the dirty shits, they nailed her tits

Across the barroom table

The Captain had a daughter

Who fell in deep sea water

And by her squeals we knew the eels

Had found 'er sexual quarters

Edit Lyrics

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our Sea Shanty Cap'n…..

Friggin' in the Riggin' from them there Sex Pistols

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any riggers on board? This innocent stow away makes a habit of getting caught by riggers

Peach x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our Sea Shanty Cap'n…..

Friggin' in the Riggin' from them there Sex Pistols"

... Cap'n don't like the sex pistols.

*Cap'n starts loading flintlock pistol*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any riggers on board? This innocent stow away makes a habit of getting caught by riggers

Peach x"

We do... I'll allow him to introduce himself.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Ship ahoy captain! Shall I fire off a warning shot at their bow? (considering the disaster I caused last time...)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ship ahoy captain! Shall I fire off a warning shot at their bow? (considering the disaster I caused last time...)

No! Not you! Anyone but you! What you doing in the Crowd Nest anyway? Wait out....

Who has a scope on them? Get eyes on the colours She's sailing under. Someone report back ASAP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our Sea Shanty Cap'n…..

Friggin' in the Riggin' from them there Sex Pistols

... Cap'n don't like the sex pistols.

*Cap'n starts loading flintlock pistol*"

Seaman Staines looks doomed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/19 12:58:38]

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Ship ahoy captain! Shall I fire off a warning shot at their bow? (considering the disaster I caused last time...)

No! Not you! Anyone but you! What you doing in the Crowd Nest anyway? Wait out....

Who has a scope on them? Get eyes on the colours She's sailing under. Someone report back ASAP

Sorry captain - I was a bit delirious after the combination of an undercooked rat, dysentery, a bit of scurvy and some over-imbibing of ale.....

Also, could you pass on to the deck hand that I didn’t quite manage to throw up overboard in time......

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I presume you will all be rodgering the cabin boy then.

Oi Rodgers is mine...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink..."

Who will be providing the sodomy and the lash?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'll be the bar man although we only have rum to drink...

Who will be providing the sodomy and the lash?"

I'll provide "On the lash" Rest is down to your goodselves

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What are you all doing? This ship is in shit state! Half the side is blown out, someone's puked all over the decking!

Cixi ran a slack ship by the looks of things!

Right, that ship on the Horizon is a Spanish Galleon, we'd best avoid her given our current condition.

Sail on.

Stains - Sort out this mess.

- Nice job with the Rigging.

Now get to work you dogs before I have the lot of you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines"

I like Cixi. She's nice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What are you all doing? This ship is in shit state! Half the side is blown out, someone's puked all over the decking!

Cixi ran a slack ship by the looks of things!

Right, that ship on the Horizon is a Spanish Galleon, we'd best avoid her given our current condition.

Sail on.

Stains - Sort out this mess.

- Nice job with the Rigging.

Now get to work you dogs before I have the lot of you!

Only if you pay us, and not in pieces of bloody eight - the exchange rate's crap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines"

It has to be said - I'm standing shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Khaaaaaaaaaaannn".

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

I like Cixi. She's nice. "

Well maybe you can meet her one day, she still exists in spirit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

I like Cixi. She's nice.

Well maybe you can meet her one day, she still exists in spirit

I feel stupidly sad. Not sure if you feel pressured to hide. Dunno.

I'll fuck off. Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

It has to be said - I'm standing shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Khaaaaaaaaaaannn"."

What do you want paying in?

Is that a good "Khaaaaan" or a bad one?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is a Master Bates on board

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

I like Cixi. She's nice.

Well maybe you can meet her one day, she still exists in spirit

I feel stupidly sad. Not sure if you feel pressured to hide. Dunno.

I'll fuck off. Xx"

This isn't very pirate

Yiure embarrassing me infront of the crew. Step into my cabin..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

It has to be said - I'm standing shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Khaaaaaaaaaaannn".

What do you want paying in?

Is that a good "Khaaaaan" or a bad one?"

I want doubloons! And the Khaaaaaaaan thing is a quote from Star Trek 2. It wasn't a good Khaaaaaaaaaan.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

We have a new problem captain! - There’s a bloody great tear in the sails and we’re taking on water faster than my humble ale flaggen can bail it out; I tell yer, she canny take much more Captain!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have a new problem captain! - There’s a bloody great tear in the sails and we’re taking on water faster than my humble ale flaggen can bail it out; I tell yer, she canny take much more Captain!

I recommend splicing the mainbrace and furling the mizzens

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By *ubenesque.Woman
over a year ago

over by there

We need to make land Cap'n before we go down and we're all lost!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

It has to be said - I'm standing shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Khaaaaaaaaaaannn".

What do you want paying in?

Is that a good "Khaaaaan" or a bad one?

I want doubloons! And the Khaaaaaaaan thing is a quote from Star Trek 2. It wasn't a good Khaaaaaaaaaan."

You're very demanding. You can be the QuarterMaster

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Panic!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I recommend splicing the mainbrace and furling the mizzens

Do it now! We're going down

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

*Jumps overboard!*

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We need to make land Cap'n before we go down and we're all lost!!

You're telling me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cap'n Cixi is DEAD. This is a Mutiny, I be Cap'n Kahn.

Same rules, carry on.. Mop up this mess Staines

It has to be said - I'm standing shaking my fist at the sky and shouting "Khaaaaaaaaaaannn".

What do you want paying in?

Is that a good "Khaaaaan" or a bad one?

I want doubloons! And the Khaaaaaaaan thing is a quote from Star Trek 2. It wasn't a good Khaaaaaaaaaan.

You're very demanding. You can be the QuarterMaster"

I was hoping to be ship's cook - I've got a genuine pegleg, and everything. Can't grow a beard though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

I'll happily send my semen your way

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

Cap'n jumps overboard

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

‘All hands on dick! Er.....deck!’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

I'll happily send my semen your way"

So that's why the sea's so salty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*mermaid Rubi swims up alongside the boat and sings the sweetest song, hoping to lure the seamen into the sea so she can seduce them

I'll happily send my semen your way

So that's why the sea's so salty."
and fertile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What are you all doing? This ship is in shit state! Half the side is blown out, someone's puked all over the decking!

Cixi ran a slack ship by the looks of things!

Right, that ship on the Horizon is a Spanish Galleon, we'd best avoid her given our current condition.

Sail on.

Stains - Sort out this mess.

- Nice job with the Rigging.

Now get to work you dogs before I have the lot of you!

I’m disinclined to acquiesce to your request. Means no!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in! I'm a competent sailor so I'm sure you'll be able to find a use for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm in! I'm a competent sailor so I'm sure you'll be able to find a use for me

Rescue me, I'm scared of sharks

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What a fiasco

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Do we have a life boat onboard?

Um....was it my job to load it on?

Ahhhh......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What a fiasco"

I blame the captain.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I see Tortuga! Paddle everyone!

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Avast behind

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