FabSwingers.com forum: Things schools couldn't get away with now

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?"
Lol i call bs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cooking class. But girls only

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs"

I was in primary school in the 70's. Bernard Manning and Jim Davidson were considered funny back then, darts players supped pints and smoked tabs at matches and The Sweeney hadn't had their breakfast.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I wasnt taught alot of anything to be fair

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs

My art teacher actually smoked in the classroom!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

[Removed by poster at 28/01/19 23:10:47]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"Cooking class. But girls only "

1980 and I was in high school, the first year girls had woodwork, metalwork and technical drawing as part of their timetable and the boys had home economics.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss Penny TrationWoman
over a year ago

My teacher calling me a slag

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs

Bernard Manning is still my favourite ever comedian ! Saw him loads of times at his club when I lived up there from the age of 18 to 26 .

Used to love Alf Garnett too

And yeah , times change . I remember watching snooker on the box in the seventies and the players chain smoked throughout the game . It was a different world we lived in , and grew up in .

Back on topic , there was ,any a time the teacher would throw the board cleaner across the classroom to get a kids attention , and getting the cane was a badge of honour !

And if you forgot your PE kit , you did it in hour underwear !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Forcing everyone naked into showers after pe. Do they still do that?. Clever girls just had the longest period ever and got a cubicle with a door.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

Being sent home for not wearing the correct uniform!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs

I watched an old episode of Bullseye the other night and Jocky Wilson came on for Bronze Bully with a ciggy in his hand

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Girls were taught to wash and iron a shirt in home economics.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms "

Na the kids parents would likely sue him and go to the papers claiming that said teacher was absuing there son

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The science teacher set light to stuff right in front of our eyes.

PE teachers watched us have showers.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms

Na the kids parents would likely sue him and go to the papers claiming that said teacher was absuing there son"

You would be surprised at what kids don't grass to their parents about from school

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last year of primary school, someone would get chosen to take the teachers their coffee... Boiling hot jugs on trays carried down a slippy corridor!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms

Na the kids parents would likely sue him and go to the papers claiming that said teacher was absuing there son

You would be surprised at what kids don't grass to their parents about from school "

Would like to think my son tells us every thing

He's only 9

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

when i was in my last year of junior school we went away for the week. We had 3 teachers with us 2 of which where male. They used to come in the girls dorm at night and help put us to bed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?"

Is it 45? As he can use the butts of the ones he makes to make another? And still have four buts left.....

I was taught that memorising useless information was a valuable tool and essential in later life.

They feckin lied. Although useful for pub quizzes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

PE in your underwear if you forgot your kit

Staff vs Pupils rugby games where the teachers targetted the naughty kids for particularly rough tackles.

We had a particularly sadistic chemistry teacher who if your top button wasn't done up would str*ngle you with your tie.

He also on one occasion when a kid accidentally set fire to some sulphur made him carry the dish round the classroom ingesting the fumes.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id get away with things the same way do me mr head teacher and you will walk home

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Think my french teacher is still in prison for "historic" crimes i know he got about 8 years

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms

Na the kids parents would likely sue him and go to the papers claiming that said teacher was absuing there son

You would be surprised at what kids don't grass to their parents about from school

Would like to think my son tells us every thing

He's only 9"

I'm talking more secondary school.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My IT teacher smoked in class while we played on lemmings. He didn't give a shit. My RE techer threw a table at me. I also got locked in a cupboard full of confiscated booze for 2 hours to do lines. Didn't finish the lines but it was a good 2 hours! Got suspended for that but worth it. By that I mean I drank the booze... just in case it needed explaining.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"PE in your underwear if you forgot your kit

Staff vs Pupils rugby games where the teachers targetted the naughty kids for particularly rough tackles.

We had a particularly sadistic chemistry teacher who if your top button wasn't done up would str*ngle you with your tie.

He also on one occasion when a kid accidentally set fire to some sulphur made him carry the dish round the classroom ingesting the fumes."

Some still do the tie thing, but in a jokey way.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

my sewing teacher kept a bottle of gin in the cupboard and my metalwork teacher used to cadge fags of me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

always blackboard rubbers flying across the class

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

"PE in your underwear if you forgot your kit

Staff vs Pupils rugby games where the teachers targetted the naughty kids for particularly rough tackles.

We had a particularly sadistic chemistry teacher who if your top button wasn't done up would str*ngle you with your tie.

He also on one occasion when a kid accidentally set fire to some sulphur made him carry the dish round the classroom ingesting the fumes.

Some still do the tie thing, but in a jokey way."

This wasn't jokey - can remember many a kid going bright red in the face due to lack of oxygen and the thing is he got away with it for years

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I got the slipper at least once a month right through school and always for smoking

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

6 of the best

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"I got the slipper at least once a month right through school and always for smoking"

I spent 10 years at boarding school and one of our housemaster's deputy had a plimsoll who was called Bernard. He may as well have hit you with a wet kipper for what use it was

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting the odd female teacher, jeez they were so soft and easy. We never listened to a word they said.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"PE in your underwear if you forgot your kit

Staff vs Pupils rugby games where the teachers targetted the naughty kids for particularly rough tackles.

We had a particularly sadistic chemistry teacher who if your top button wasn't done up would str*ngle you with your tie.

He also on one occasion when a kid accidentally set fire to some sulphur made him carry the dish round the classroom ingesting the fumes.

Some still do the tie thing, but in a jokey way.

This wasn't jokey - can remember many a kid going bright red in the face due to lack of oxygen and the thing is he got away with it for years"

It's called peanutting now and they have a talk on how dangerous it is, in year 7.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha I remember a few things that have been said already.

PE teachers watching you shower and doing PE in your underwear if you forgot your kit.

Or worse wearing a skanky spare one

Teachers knicking your fags and smoking them.

Smoking in the toilets.

Things on fire in Science class.

Chalk being thrown across the room by teachers when you weren't listening.

Being sent home from school if you were in incorrect uniform.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Female teacher used to sit infront of me with her legs spread, wouldnt get away with that now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs"

That's because you're not old enough to remember such questions, but they did exist ha! The variant I remember was a bit different and a bit of a trick;

"If a tramp can make a cigarette from each 5 butts that he finds, how many cigarettes can he make from 25 butts?"

Answer was 6 as obviously he'd smoke the 5 he made and make another from the butts of them.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?"

Respect. For self and others.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Marking work with red pen, apparently they are not allowed anymore.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eepfoughtMan
over a year ago

Burnley

New Concept English, back.in the 1970s (and still in use in English as a Foreign Language classes around the globe) frequently refers to drinking and smoking. I remember one lesson in particular that revolves around a host being visited by a friend and the 'polite' thing to do was to to offer him brandy and a cigar.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember one Welsh teacher who was a complete nut case and who probably spent weekend setting fire to holiday cottages. His favourite weapon of choice was to hurl a big bunch of keys if you were caught up to something in class. I once saw them coming ducked, they then smashed through a window. I got a right bollocking and was sent down 3 flights of stairs to find them. I found them, dropped them down a grid and told him they were lost.

I Ran into him a number of years later in a pub and admitted to what I'd done, he laughed and said he suspected that's what I'd done and would have done the same thing. I bought him a few drinks that night

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Girls were taught to wash and iron a shirt in home economics."

Ali must have played the Wag that day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My junior school teacher taught us basic maths by getting us to play darts. Would never get that past H&S rules now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

Father O'Brien and his wandering hands?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Father O'Brien and his wandering hands?"

Sounds like my re teacher when I was in high school

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rbean69Man
over a year ago

Stroud

So many things....

In the last year at primary school, our teacher, Mr P., let his favourite girls sit on his lap for a cuddle in front of the class. They didn't seem to mind, but I remember most of us thinking it was a bit weird. Incidentally, two of the girls used to play "you show me yours and I'll show you mine" with me. The entire class - 14 boys and 28 girls - passed their 11-plus, so at least Mr P. could teach. I remember in my 3rd year at grammar school thinking we had just about reached the stage in English Language teaching we reached at the end of primary school.

Grammar school was much more lax, although considered a strict school. Plenty of strange teachers. My first year form (& French language) teacher would pull boys out of their seats by their ears if they misbehaved.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Being sent home for not wearing the correct uniform! "

They still do that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickeyblueeyes7Man
over a year ago

newport

PE teacher lining the class up along the gym wall then kicking footballs at us and not being allowed to move

We’re all PE teachers sadistic bastards

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickeyblueeyes7Man
over a year ago

newport

We had a teacher called Ozzie flick he would pick his nose then flick at someone in class

Another teacher had a glass eye he would take it out put it on his desk when leaving the room saying I’ve got my eye on you lot

Come to think of it all my teachers were all abit strange

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?"

Wow lol. I can't beleive they asked that! Good way to get the kids attention maybe.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oonloverWoman
over a year ago

bognor regis

"always blackboard rubbers flying across the class"
and they usually got their target even of you tried to dodge it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I used to spend time at teachers homes, it seemed normal but probably wouldn't happen now.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Favourite reading book at school was Little Black Sambo...don't think they'd stock it now, let alone have it on a reading list!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I used to spend time at teachers homes, it seemed normal but probably wouldn't happen now. "

When I was 13 I played piano for a male octet. They'd practice in my house most Fridays and they'd sing in churches around the south east most Saturdays.

Can you imagine the uproar today! A thirteen year old girl with eight 45+ men!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eriousGuyABCMan
over a year ago

( WEST OF ) Chippenham ish

"Cooking class. But girls only

1980 and I was in high school, the first year girls had woodwork, metalwork and technical drawing as part of their timetable and the boys had home economics. "

I was one of only two guys who carried on with H/E into the 4th year in the early 80's. We got the piss taken out of us, but while the rest of the guys were cutting or filing bits of metal and wood, we were surrounded by 20-30 cute girls

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ruler on palm of hands ..ouch!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickeyblueeyes7Man
over a year ago

newport

"ruler on palm of hands ..ouch!

Our French teacher used to hit you on the head with the edge of a ruler now that hurt

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We just used to make toast in maths, our maths teacher was always pregnant and the supply never turned up.

Our history teacher used to throw the blackboard rubber if one of us wasn't paying attention

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't mean the cane.

I remember vaguely from primary school a maths question:

If a tramp found can make a cigarette from 5 butts, keeping the butt of each one he smoked to use in another cigarette, how many butts would he need to find to smoke 10 cigarettes a day?

What were you taught that kids wouldn't be taught now?Lol i call bs"

I second this.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *Cocksucker84Man
over a year ago

salford

We had a science teacher as recent as 2000. He was a good looking guy but he had some shady views and told our class that he felt uncomfortable around gay men and didn't think he should have to work with any... there were gay teachers in the school. Ropey back then but saying shit like that now would result in his dismissal and rightly so.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a member of a religious order who used to threaten us with ‘Ill get my little dick out on you’. It’s what he called his instrument of corporal punishment.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If when I wanked I came enough to glaze your donut how many times would I need to cum to fill your bath ???

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Last year of primary school, someone would get chosen to take the teachers their coffee... Boiling hot jugs on trays carried down a slippy corridor!"

They said "boiling hot jugs " heeee heeee. Still at skool clearly.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having the board rubber hurled at your head for talking, calling your friends mong's and black kids sambo's

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *cousesubsallyWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere out there

Our Geography teachers would go and get pissed every dinner time - slurred their way through the afternoons stinking of whiskey

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Taking the bunsen burner off the rubber pipe, open the valve and blow down it, puts all the bunsens out in the room. Great when you are at a critical point.

I was eventually caught and made to kneel up at the front of the class for twenty minutes, didn’t do it again, well for awhile at least.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

writing on slates. ..at least without roof ladders

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oachman 9CoolMan
over a year ago

derby

"when I was in school, I refused to play rugby during games. When we had rugby I just didn’t bring my kit.

My games teacher would lose his rag every time and hit me with the clip board on top of my head.

If he did that now he’s probably get beaten up in the changing rooms "
It was a few years after leaveing school that my games teacher actually did get beat up not in the changeing room but actually outside by one of the parents, the teacher used his sports slipper on my buttocks a few times for not bringing my sports kit in one swipe was excruciateing pain but it was the norm in those days nevertheless some schoolkids now days are morons by nature no respect for anyone which is sad really.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone remember dipping a nib-pen in an ink well set in the desk . couldn't do that now .'elf & safety,some Ralph(Simpsons) would drink it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Throwing the chalk board erasure at you for talking

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

The whack

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My lo has just done the titanic - apparently nobody died

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Cough and drop.

Yes they used to and I remember standing nervously in line waiting my turn.

God knows how they got away with it then let alone now.

Nurse Gladys cold clammy hand around my tiny nadgers.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sm81Couple
over a year ago

warwickshire

In PE using all wooden equipment, climbing up shaky apparatus all the way to the top and also the rope climbing but it was all good as we had a flimsy crash mat just in case we fell!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"Cooking class. But girls only

1980 and I was in high school, the first year girls had woodwork, metalwork and technical drawing as part of their timetable and the boys had home economics.

Me too!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can’t sing bah bah black sheep it’s now rainbow coulred sheep

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ickeyblueeyes7Man
over a year ago

newport

"Throwing the chalk board erasure at you for talking "

It was called a black board back then

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Teaching that life is competitive.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When did Bodacia become Booooodika. yuk

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can’t sing bah bah black sheep it’s now rainbow coulred sheep "
yep your not wrong can't sing bah bah black sheep ... Can't sing merry Christmas songs now and hold nativity plays just in case it offends. ... Still tell the niece's to sing it though ... Freedom of speech and that .. don't want them to be silenced because someone cries racism because a nursery rhyme or Christmas song.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread