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How common are hackers on here?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I don't know if this is me being thick but majority of the time when I come on here my preferences are being changed!!

For the record we are only interested in MEN hubby is straight and I'm straight. But just now I've had a load of 'winks' from couples (go away!!) went on my settings and most of the filters were unchecked. I know the other half isn't changing it, well I hope not otherwise thats a massive invasion of my trust and maybe this shouldn't be for me. Apart from that how has anyone ever had their settings messed about without their knowledge? It's making me have second thoughts about all this and only been on here a couple of weeks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t know your other half so can’t judge him but I’ve been on and off here for about 5 years and never heard of it happening so it’s more than likely the other half changing it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never happened to me either and been here over 8 years. More than likely it’s the other person who has access to the account.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Small update, just went to double check the settings on my profile and it said we are looking for women and couples. Quickly changed all that - we are definitely not looking for women and couples I'm raaaaging!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone was hacking your account they would do much more than just changing your profile settings. For one, they’d steal your password and lock you out of your account. Probably send messages to people posing as you. Steal your photos. Etc etc.

It’s probably either an error, or your husband.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

Change your password just in case.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Change your password just in case. "

This and make sure you remember to save your settings. X

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Change your password just in case.

This and make sure you remember to save your settings. X"

I'm on it!! Feeling a tad paranoid because of the whole nature of this site you know lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Never happened to me either and been here over 8 years. More than likely it’s the other person who has access to the account. "

Always. If you know someone has access to your account, start your enquiry there.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

There's quite a few I should imagine - As there would be in any techy using community.

That rug in your bathroom has seen better days ( just helping ) and you need to check your bank balance FAR too much shopping on Amazon tut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people) "

Looking is one thing, taking it further another. Talk to him about it in a nice way.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people) "

Maybe he's lifted the filters just so he can have a wee look at women and couples updates, I think blocking them blocks the updates too, so it could be that he's just being nosey.

Or maybe you're changing the filters but not saving it properly? This has never happened to me, I'd say it's highly unlikely you've been hacked.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people) "

*if* it was him.

We make changes to our settings independently of each other. We mention that we've done it though. Sometimes Mr N puts a photo of me up that I hate so I take it down.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This has never happened to us before either. Have that conversation with your man and invite openness and honesty. If you find the cause there then at least the question is answered and how you go about things will be in your hands. It is the not knowing that is the worst part, for me at least.

Good luck love x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

*if* it was him.

We make changes to our settings independently of each other. We mention that we've done it though. Sometimes Mr N puts a photo of me up that I hate so I take it down. "

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There's quite a few I should imagine - As there would be in any techy using community.

That rug in your bathroom has seen better days ( just helping ) and you need to check your bank balance FAR too much shopping on Amazon tut "

You got the bank balance thing right hahahahaha fuck my life I'm broke as a joke

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

You need to talk to him, not us and stop jumping to conclusions.

I would say that you're not fully comitted to this and should stop now.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

It might not have been him though. Sounds like you need to have a chat with him about it and set clear boundaries of what is and isn't acceptable to you both. Maybe he doesn't know you'd be so upset about him just looking.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy"

Have you asked him yet, quite frankly I'd stop commenting and speak to him as he could view you discussing his potential behaviours as being untrustworthy. Especially if he has done nothing wrong, I'd be hurt if it were me.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't know if this is me being thick but majority of the time when I come on here my preferences are being changed!!

For the record we are only interested in MEN hubby is straight and I'm straight. But just now I've had a load of 'winks' from couples (go away!!) went on my settings and most of the filters were unchecked. I know the other half isn't changing it, well I hope not otherwise thats a massive invasion of my trust and maybe this shouldn't be for me. Apart from that how has anyone ever had their settings messed about without their knowledge? It's making me have second thoughts about all this and only been on here a couple of weeks."

i barely looked at the thread and just went with my thinking...

for fuck sakes...HOT PICS!!!!!!

am one minded

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

*if* it was him.

We make changes to our settings independently of each other. We mention that we've done it though. Sometimes Mr N puts a photo of me up that I hate so I take it down.

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy"

As I said above you're jumping to conclusions.

Log off, talk to your partner and for heavens sake don't have sex with another man to please him, its bad for your soul

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

My settings only get changed when I do it.

Have a chat to your other half. Ultimately this is something you both have to agree to, and couples/ women, at least, aren't likely to bombard you with mail.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does he ever read the forum? Probably best to have a word before he does?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

It might not have been him though. Sounds like you need to have a chat with him about it and set clear boundaries of what is and isn't acceptable to you both. Maybe he doesn't know you'd be so upset about him just looking. "

Oh he knows!! I'm extremely insecure although he said that my confidence has gone right up since we started this. I just wanted a bit of advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy

Have you asked him yet, quite frankly I'd stop commenting and speak to him as he could view you discussing his potential behaviours as being untrustworthy. Especially if he has done nothing wrong, I'd be hurt if it were me."

He knows, I've asked him before and he avoided the answer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

If he's had to convince you and you're only doing it to make him happy......I'd say you're doing it for all the wrong reasons. You have a say in this and you have the right to say no. He's your husband and should respect that unequivocally

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Giving in to make your other half happy isn't good, either.

I think you should have a serious chat to your other half.

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Small update, just went to double check the settings on my profile and it said we are looking for women and couples. Quickly changed all that - we are definitely not looking for women and couples I'm raaaaging! "

The easiest thing to do is change your password and see if the settings change again.

Have you asked your OH? They might just want be fiddling.

Cal

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on.

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.

Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

Sounds like you need to have a serious conversation. You should never feel pressurised into doing anything so if you are just doing this for him then you should stop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know this might sound stupid and forgive me if I am , but are you saving the changes or just closing the page when done ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy

Have you asked him yet, quite frankly I'd stop commenting and speak to him as he could view you discussing his potential behaviours as being untrustworthy. Especially if he has done nothing wrong, I'd be hurt if it were me.

He knows, I've asked him before and he avoided the answer "

Trust me, you do not want to be playing out personal issues on a public forum. If you can't agree on this privately you need to step back until you can.

I don't know if you're aware but you don't need to be a member of fab to read the forums.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on."

He'll only see it if he goes looking in the forums. It's not like we get notifications when others reply. I'd say she's safe enough posting about it

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

*if* it was him.

We make changes to our settings independently of each other. We mention that we've done it though. Sometimes Mr N puts a photo of me up that I hate so I take it down.

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy"

Before you start having a fall out make sure after ticking the settings you go to the very bottom and click on save settings. You might have forgotten to and that's what has happened.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Does he ever read the forum? Probably best to have a word before he does?"

Probably not but if he did he'd realise that I'm serious because I've spoke to him multiple times about it and it gets laughed off and couple days later my settings gets mysteriously changed AGAIN. This is the 3rd,4th time now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

Can’t the other person (your a couple remember) still be curious? Or have fantasy’s?

Yes, the adventure on here maybe about sharing you right now, but does that mean you’ll stop all of the good stuff your doing because he likes the idea of something more?

You know?

Broken mistrust about your setting maybe (he may not have) but Have a think about it as a couple, because that’s what you are.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

*if* it was him.

We make changes to our settings independently of each other. We mention that we've done it though. Sometimes Mr N puts a photo of me up that I hate so I take it down.

See now I'm thinking he's doing it and not telling me which is find is untrustworthy

Before you start having a fall out make sure after ticking the settings you go to the very bottom and click on save settings. You might have forgotten to and that's what has happened. "

Always always save the changes Always have have done lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on.

He'll only see it if he goes looking in the forums. It's not like we get notifications when others reply. I'd say she's safe enough posting about it

"

And how do you know he wouldn't go and look?

If he is changing settings why wouldn't be do other stuff like check she is posting on the forum?

You have no idea the sick lengths people will go to.

I say this because I came to fab in a similar way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Can’t the other person (your a couple remember) still be curious? Or have fantasy’s?

Yes, the adventure on here maybe about sharing you right now, but does that mean you’ll stop all of the good stuff your doing because he likes the idea of something more?

You know?

Broken mistrust about your setting maybe (he may not have) but Have a think about it as a couple, because that’s what you are. "

If he wants something more he can find someone else to do it with and I've told him this Hundreds of times. I'd happily not do this at all I'm doing it because he loves watching me. I'm just pissed and upset that I feel like I'm not enough

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Generally HACKERS are only interested in making money, and HACKING your fab account wouldn't be worth the hassle. People often think that they're "being hacked" when in fact they've just allowed their password to get out. Also consider who else might have access to your computer or phone, especially if passwords are remembered by the device.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people) "

Do you think it might be him changing it?

I would say that's a very bad thing and for me the trust would be gone. Swinging isn't about lying and deceit.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Does he ever read the forum? Probably best to have a word before he does?

Probably not but if he did he'd realise that I'm serious because I've spoke to him multiple times about it and it gets laughed off and couple days later my settings gets mysteriously changed AGAIN. This is the 3rd,4th time now "

Ok. If you don't like how he wants to do things or his attitude towards your concerns simply stop swinging until you can agree on clear, mutually agreed boundaries.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on."

I'm fully aware, maybe he'll realise how fucked off I am then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Can’t the other person (your a couple remember) still be curious? Or have fantasy’s?

Yes, the adventure on here maybe about sharing you right now, but does that mean you’ll stop all of the good stuff your doing because he likes the idea of something more?

You know?

Broken mistrust about your setting maybe (he may not have) but Have a think about it as a couple, because that’s what you are.

If he wants something more he can find someone else to do it with and I've told him this Hundreds of times. I'd happily not do this at all I'm doing it because he loves watching me. I'm just pissed and upset that I feel like I'm not enough "

It was just my penny’s worth, You definitely need to talk to him. All the best.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Do you think it might be him changing it?

I would say that's a very bad thing and for me the trust would be gone. Swinging isn't about lying and deceit. "

Thank you I was waiting for a reply like this although everyone else has also been helpful I was just thinking I am overreacting about it being deceitful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on.

I'm fully aware, maybe he'll realise how fucked off I am then "

You're not going to find health in your relationship in this forum.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Can’t the other person (your a couple remember) still be curious? Or have fantasy’s?

Yes, the adventure on here maybe about sharing you right now, but does that mean you’ll stop all of the good stuff your doing because he likes the idea of something more?

You know?

Broken mistrust about your setting maybe (he may not have) but Have a think about it as a couple, because that’s what you are.

If he wants something more he can find someone else to do it with and I've told him this Hundreds of times. I'd happily not do this at all I'm doing it because he loves watching me. I'm just pissed and upset that I feel like I'm not enough "

Why are you still married to a man who treats you with so little respect?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on.

I'm fully aware, maybe he'll realise how fucked off I am then

You're not going to find health in your relationship in this forum. "

Very true

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Does he ever read the forum? Probably best to have a word before he does?

Probably not but if he did he'd realise that I'm serious because I've spoke to him multiple times about it and it gets laughed off and couple days later my settings gets mysteriously changed AGAIN. This is the 3rd,4th time now

Ok. If you don't like how he wants to do things or his attitude towards your concerns simply stop swinging until you can agree on clear, mutually agreed boundaries."

This is a very bad place to play these issues out. Swinging doesn't seem like a good idea given the concerns you've raised here. Step away from the forum, talk to your other half, do not even attempt to swing until you're both on the same page. Maybe discuss the balance between non monogamy and jealousy, and if/ how they can be handled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Do you think it might be him changing it?

I would say that's a very bad thing and for me the trust would be gone. Swinging isn't about lying and deceit.

Thank you I was waiting for a reply like this although everyone else has also been helpful I was just thinking I am overreacting about it being deceitful "

I don't think you are over reacting at all. From the other information you've given, you don't want to do this at all. It sounds like he's wittered on about it so much you've given in to keep the peace.

It's a slippery slope. If he's just laughed it off that's really disrespectful. You deserve better.

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By *nvercoupleCouple
over a year ago

Inverness

I am finding any of this hard to believe if I'm being honest.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Do you think it might be him changing it?

I would say that's a very bad thing and for me the trust would be gone. Swinging isn't about lying and deceit.

Thank you I was waiting for a reply like this although everyone else has also been helpful I was just thinking I am overreacting about it being deceitful

I don't think you are over reacting at all. From the other information you've given, you don't want to do this at all. It sounds like he's wittered on about it so much you've given in to keep the peace.

It's a slippery slope. If he's just laughed it off that's really disrespectful. You deserve better. "

I agree. If you don't want to do this, shut it down. If non monogamy isn't something you're comfortable with, it should be a deal breaker. If you've conceded unwillingly and he's exceeding your boundaries, even more reason to shut it down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Do you think it might be him changing it?

I would say that's a very bad thing and for me the trust would be gone. Swinging isn't about lying and deceit.

Thank you I was waiting for a reply like this although everyone else has also been helpful I was just thinking I am overreacting about it being deceitful

I don't think you are over reacting at all. From the other information you've given, you don't want to do this at all. It sounds like he's wittered on about it so much you've given in to keep the peace.

It's a slippery slope. If he's just laughed it off that's really disrespectful. You deserve better. "

Yeah alarm bells started ringing when she mentioned she does it to keep him happy that’s not how swinging should work tbh

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I am finding any of this hard to believe if I'm being honest."

I always take the view that, if this is true, this is what I think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am finding any of this hard to believe if I'm being honest.

I always take the view that, if this is true, this is what I think. "

Same. I just reply to the info given.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

Do you know what site you are on? Your husband will no doubt look at women on the site.

To your last comment, no one should do something they don't want to just to please their OH, especially swinging

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"I don’t know your other half so can’t judge him but I’ve been on and off here for about 5 years and never heard of it happening so it’s more than likely the other half changing it "

Been here ten years and never heard of that either!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for the non judgemental input guys (seriously though you've all been quite understanding) obviously I wanted people to talk to and can't exactly ring up my mates and rant about this lol imagine the reaction I would get so thought you guys would be best! As you've all suggested to talk to him about it, that I have done numerous times to no avail. Will probably deactivate this until we come to a mutual agreement where I don't feel like an insecure piece of shit and he stops fucking around with the settings. Quick question though. We are both logged in on each of our phones and I've just changed my password (again!!) so would he get logged out of the account on his phone? Bit stupid init, my brain is absolutely mashed from all this haha

Love you all xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo

I don't know if it would log him off at that time but when he tries to log back in he would need the new password

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me. "

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!"

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too. "

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

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By *nsatiable_nymphWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere down south


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too. "

This

Op I think it's worth having a serious chat with your OH and hiding your account for a bit until you've sorted out whatever is going on.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc "

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it "

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min "

Good luck! Hope you get it all sorted, not a nice situation for either of you

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it "

It's not a shitty reply - it's my reply to your comment on an open forum.

The truth is, it's downright silly to get upset with a partner who looks at pictures of naked women on a site you've joined together. Perhaps try talking to him about how you feel, instead of a group of strangers who can only give their opinion on something that affects you personally.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind. "

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness."

That makes more sense. I think you're right, for what it's worth.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk


"I am finding any of this hard to believe if I'm being honest."

Yes alarm bells are ringing.

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Honestly are you sure swinging is right for you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness."

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment. The person who replied underneath saying it was harsh it definitely wasn't aimed at you and I'm sorry if you thought that way!! These message threads are confusing as fuck

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness.

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment. The person who replied underneath saying it was harsh it definitely wasn't aimed at you and I'm sorry if you thought that way!! These message threads are confusing as fuck "

Boobs not books, ffs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

It's not a shitty reply - it's my reply to your comment on an open forum.

The truth is, it's downright silly to get upset with a partner who looks at pictures of naked women on a site you've joined together. Perhaps try talking to him about how you feel, instead of a group of strangers who can only give their opinion on something that affects you personally."

Ugh at risk of repeating myself...

I've talked to him about this to him numerous times

I do this because he enjoys it and it gives me more confidence (yes that sounds wrong)

I can't exactly talk to anyone else about this because of the nature of it

I think that's about it lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness.

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment. The person who replied underneath saying it was harsh it definitely wasn't aimed at you and I'm sorry if you thought that way!! These message threads are confusing as fuck

Boobs not books, ffs"

Ace typo though. It made me smile, hope it made you smile too.

Sounds like you're having a really shitty time. Sending you a virtual hug. xx

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"You know he can also see these forum posts and what you're saying?

There are many provocative posts on here that people make to get off on.

He'll only see it if he goes looking in the forums. It's not like we get notifications when others reply. I'd say she's safe enough posting about it

"

She's not. The forums are public for all to see. They can be accessed on any browser by members and non members.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I feel for you OP but at the end of the day (most) men are pervs and with access to a site like this they are bound to want to look at pics etc. It's no place for people with insecurities in my opinion.

If it is him changing settings, which I think sounds likely, he really should of discussed it with you.

Hope you get it sorted OP.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

This place can be amazing for confidence. It can also be really corrosive. I think you need to untangle the relationship and trust issues, jealousy/ non monogamy, and what you gain/ whether you want to do this. Work out what's most important to you, and if/ how you can reconcile these things. On your own and with your partner. But you put yourself and your own needs/ concerns first.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

O o O oo


"

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment.

"

A true comment isn't a useless one

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I don't know if it would log him off at that time but when he tries to log back in he would need the new password"

It asks you for the password when you try and change the page you're on from memory.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been on here on and off for over 8 years and had a couple's profile too, but never heard of this or been hacked. I think changing password every couple of weeks is a good idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This place can be amazing for confidence. It can also be really corrosive. I think you need to untangle the relationship and trust issues, jealousy/ non monogamy, and what you gain/ whether you want to do this. Work out what's most important to you, and if/ how you can reconcile these things. On your own and with your partner. But you put yourself and your own needs/ concerns first. "

I think this is great general advice for anyone. How many people ever step back and have a think about what they really want. I know I don't. Love it.

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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago

Beyond the shadows.


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness.

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment. The person who replied underneath saying it was harsh it definitely wasn't aimed at you and I'm sorry if you thought that way!! These message threads are confusing as fuck

Boobs not books, ffs"

Im only here for the book pics

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Think you should delete your account, or hide it until you're sure about this, as you're not coming across as a fun couple: all this drama already...good lord, you're on a site where women have their boobies and foo foos on show and your getting your panties in a bunch?!! For crying out loud!

I think that's a little harsh. OP may not be into it, and that's OK. She might be into it under different circumstances, and that's OK. My kink is not her kink, but we're both OK.

Being uncomfortable with other people desiring you or your partner is probably incompatible with swinging, I think. Reluctant consent is (or should be) too.

No I'm not into it enough with the shitty replies, if you haven't got anything helpful to say zip it

I beg your pardon?

I don't think you are into it. You're allowed to not be. I thought I was being helpful. Never mind.

I think her reply was meant for me, in fairness.

I was replying to the girl who was going on about this site crawling in pictures of books. Literally the most useless comment. The person who replied underneath saying it was harsh it definitely wasn't aimed at you and I'm sorry if you thought that way!! These message threads are confusing as fuck

Boobs not books, ffs

Im only here for the book pics "

Is it wrong that I'm now thinking how I'd incorporate a book into a sexy picture?

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

There are two places to change the settings. In one place it will not save, in the other it will.

The first is in the browse - Will not save and can be changed at any time and will change back.

The second is in the second is in the edit account, that one should save.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm really sorry, but it's your husband changing the settings, it's only thing that adds up. I think you should delete the account, then have a chat with him, if he keeps avoiding the subject he's clearly responsible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This place can be amazing for confidence. It can also be really corrosive. I think you need to untangle the relationship and trust issues, jealousy/ non monogamy, and what you gain/ whether you want to do this. Work out what's most important to you, and if/ how you can reconcile these things. On your own and with your partner. But you put yourself and your own needs/ concerns first.

I think this is great general advice for anyone. How many people ever step back and have a think about what they really want. I know I don't. Love it. "

But it’s not all about me me me. A couple is a couple, it’s more than 1 person.

I’m sorry if, I don’t mean this in a bad way, but I do here the fact that it’s your way or no way for the swinging thing.

And again in this post, put yourself and your needs first. That sound selfish.

So I repeat what I said before. Talk to your spouse. If you love each other first and foremost, reconciliation isn’t far behind.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"This place can be amazing for confidence. It can also be really corrosive. I think you need to untangle the relationship and trust issues, jealousy/ non monogamy, and what you gain/ whether you want to do this. Work out what's most important to you, and if/ how you can reconcile these things. On your own and with your partner. But you put yourself and your own needs/ concerns first.

I think this is great general advice for anyone. How many people ever step back and have a think about what they really want. I know I don't. Love it.

But it’s not all about me me me. A couple is a couple, it’s more than 1 person.

I’m sorry if, I don’t mean this in a bad way, but I do here the fact that it’s your way or no way for the swinging thing.

And again in this post, put yourself and your needs first. That sound selfish.

So I repeat what I said before. Talk to your spouse. If you love each other first and foremost, reconciliation isn’t far behind. "

That's not really what I meant, though.

If you don't want to swing, you shouldn't swing. Some things are about the individual, and both parties have to reconcile what they want individually with what can be done together.

The OP has agreed, it seems, because her husband wants her to. She has to want to for herself or this won't end well.

I'm not saying she should be endlessly selfish for all eternity. I'm saying she should have a solid sense of what *she* wants before considering how to apply it within the context of her relationship. Compromise can be taken (way) too far.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

A man doesn't need to change settings to look at pictures of books. They are available for all to see regardless of preferences in fact lots of single male profiles have women's bodies on them.

Swinging is not for the insecure, faint hearted or relationships in which one or both partners needs aren't heard and taken in to account.

Telling someone it's all their partners fault without knowing the other side of the story isn't helpful in my opinion and only serves to convince one of them that they're right and the other is wrong.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I don't think I'm being selfish. He enjoys watching and I enjoy seeing his reaction (if I'm on top of someone or sucking them off or anything like that) after said bloke has gone he'll tell me how well I've done and how proud he is and lucky that he is to have me. I wouldn't call us swingers though as we don't do swaps. he mentioned cuckolding but that involves humiliation and we don't do that so I'd say I'm more of a hot wife? Correct me if any of that is wrong though

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

* boobs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!"

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"* boobs "

You lot aren't going to let that go are you hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m single but I’d be wary if my partner wanted to watch me with other guys, yes I know some guys get off on it but if I did anything with other guys I’d always think he would have a free pass to go with other women, which I definitely wouldn’t be into!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx "

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

op when you change your settings are you actually scrolling all the way down and clicking save. If you dont click save they wont change

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask him if he would like to meet single women and couples. Tell him you want him to be honest and you will respect his wants too.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"* boobs

You lot aren't going to let that go are you hahaha "

I was correcting my post which autocorrected to books

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"op when you change your settings are you actually scrolling all the way down and clicking save. If you dont click save they wont change"

It could be as simple as that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"op when you change your settings are you actually scrolling all the way down and clicking save. If you dont click save they wont change"

shuttit you tripe

(I never thought tripe was a word)

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"The thought of him looking at other women in that way makes me want to scream. It was his idea to "share" me its taken him about a year to convince me and I gave in because I want to make him happy. Unfortunately now I feel like I'm not enough and this kind of thing isn't for me.

Can’t the other person (your a couple remember) still be curious? Or have fantasy’s?

Yes, the adventure on here maybe about sharing you right now, but does that mean you’ll stop all of the good stuff your doing because he likes the idea of something more?

You know?

Broken mistrust about your setting maybe (he may not have) but Have a think about it as a couple, because that’s what you are.

If he wants something more he can find someone else to do it with and I've told him this Hundreds of times. I'd happily not do this at all I'm doing it because he loves watching me. I'm just pissed and upset that I feel like I'm not enough "

As others have said, I don't think you should be doing anything for someone else, you don't sound comfortable with it and he shouldn't be asking you to do this either. Some serious talking needs to be done, especially if he is looking for something else from this site. Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m single but I’d be wary if my partner wanted to watch me with other guys, yes I know some guys get off on it but if I did anything with other guys I’d always think he would have a free pass to go with other women, which I definitely wouldn’t be into!"

That's what's made me wary from the start. But he's a fair bit older than me and just wants to settle down along with having some fun if his idea of fun is watching me then fair enough lol. We do it very rarely not as much as some people on here seem to. Maybe once every couple months if that. But Yeh i told him I hope that he doesn't get any ideas that I'll let him meet other women and he gave me his word that he wouldn't

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me."

I’d agree agree with this wholeheartedly!

Op - many people have mental health problems and I’m sure you’re not ‘completely crazy’ - but ethical non-monogamy/swinging/whatever you want to call it isn’t for everyone - and if you and your partner aren’t singing from exactly the same hymn sheet it’s a mine field!

You said you hate the idea of your partner looking at other women/pics of other women ‘in that way’ - but fab is a highly sexualised site full of explicit images - and full of temptations for everyone! It’s really no place for the jealous or insecure!

I’d strongly suggest you hide your profile for now and have a real think about whether this is something you can handle without damaging you in any way!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me.

I’d agree agree with this wholeheartedly!

Op - many people have mental health problems and I’m sure you’re not ‘completely crazy’ - but ethical non-monogamy/swinging/whatever you want to call it isn’t for everyone - and if you and your partner aren’t singing from exactly the same hymn sheet it’s a mine field!

You said you hate the idea of your partner looking at other women/pics of other women ‘in that way’ - but fab is a highly sexualised site full of explicit images - and full of temptations for everyone! It’s really no place for the jealous or insecure!

I’d strongly suggest you hide your profile for now and have a real think about whether this is something you can handle without damaging you in any way! "

I'm not bothered about the photos on here you can't avoid them can you. And he's told me the pictures of women with their gash out are hanging, he prefers ladies that leave more to the imagination he said haha. It's more the fact I had the feeling he was looking for more and by changing the settings allowing people to contact us instead of actively approaching them. Hope that makes sense lol.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Having read through and followed the thread from fairly early on - something just doesn't add up for me, in fact I'll be honest and say it crossed my mind if this was just a look at me type post - I'm not saying it is, but it crossed my mind.

Purely changing settings doesn't really mean a great deal OP, just because it would mean others could contact you doesn't mean they will, and if they did you'd see that contact anyway. Changing them doesn't mean he'd be able to see any more or less than he can with your current settings, so none of it makes any sense to me.

This is something you should be talking to your other half about, as many people have already said, and if it is him changing settings (which you don't know it is yet) you need to have a discussion with him about why he's changed it, and come to an agreement about boundaries etc. and how they should be respected, and if that means not changing settings, or that any changes to your profile are only made with mutual agreement then that's the way to go.

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By *nvercoupleCouple
over a year ago

Inverness

So I will go under the assumption for now that you aren't talking a lot of rubbish and ask why does it matter what your settings are anyway? If you block single women from seeing you or mailing you that block is automatically lifted if you mail them.

That block also does not effect your account viewing and mailing those profiles.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me.

I’d agree agree with this wholeheartedly!

Op - many people have mental health problems and I’m sure you’re not ‘completely crazy’ - but ethical non-monogamy/swinging/whatever you want to call it isn’t for everyone - and if you and your partner aren’t singing from exactly the same hymn sheet it’s a mine field!

You said you hate the idea of your partner looking at other women/pics of other women ‘in that way’ - but fab is a highly sexualised site full of explicit images - and full of temptations for everyone! It’s really no place for the jealous or insecure!

I’d strongly suggest you hide your profile for now and have a real think about whether this is something you can handle without damaging you in any way!

I'm not bothered about the photos on here you can't avoid them can you. And he's told me the pictures of women with their gash out are hanging, he prefers ladies that leave more to the imagination he said haha. It's more the fact I had the feeling he was looking for more and by changing the settings allowing people to contact us instead of actively approaching them. Hope that makes sense lol. "

Have you asked him if he changed the settings yet?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me.

I’d agree agree with this wholeheartedly!

Op - many people have mental health problems and I’m sure you’re not ‘completely crazy’ - but ethical non-monogamy/swinging/whatever you want to call it isn’t for everyone - and if you and your partner aren’t singing from exactly the same hymn sheet it’s a mine field!

You said you hate the idea of your partner looking at other women/pics of other women ‘in that way’ - but fab is a highly sexualised site full of explicit images - and full of temptations for everyone! It’s really no place for the jealous or insecure!

I’d strongly suggest you hide your profile for now and have a real think about whether this is something you can handle without damaging you in any way!

I'm not bothered about the photos on here you can't avoid them can you. And he's told me the pictures of women with their gash out are hanging, he prefers ladies that leave more to the imagination he said haha. It's more the fact I had the feeling he was looking for more and by changing the settings allowing people to contact us instead of actively approaching them. Hope that makes sense lol.

Have you asked him if he changed the settings yet?"

Yeh and you can guess what he said - hackers. I'm over all this now had a melt down earlier I don't know wtf is going on.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"Would you say it's a bad thing he's looking for other things without telling me first? Feeling a bit mugged off here I'm no way interested in another woman being involved it's not the way we work (no offence I'm sure you're all nice people)

Maybe it’s about communication?

Maybe he thinks that if you get to fuck other men - he should get to fuck other women?

Maybe - just maybe - if it’s a couple profile you should be communicating with him in private instead of having a rant on here and making yourself look like a bit of a tit?

Oh - and I’m answer to your original op - I imagine hackers have better things to do than change the settings on your profile!

Noooo, we agreed beforehand. he suggested we did this I had no idea this was his kind of thing and it took a while to assure me it'll be safe and it's what he wants. he assured me that he's not interested in other women or couples and that his fantasy was to see me with a black guy (that's been ticked off) and cos he enjoyed it that much he started finding other men on here for me. I personally can't get my head around it but you have to start from somewhere don't you lol. I'm passed the thought of hackers now just me being naive thinking my other half wouldn't go looking after he told me he wouldn't then finding out he'd changed everything so more people can contact us. I'm trying to get over my insecurities and (as I've mentioned before a few times) he says my confidence is getting better. I'm very new to all this unlike a few of you who see swinging as a hobby pretty much so you have to understand I probably look more into these kind of things than most. I don't know if it's worth mentioning that I've been diagnosed that a few different mental health disorders so obviously my views and way of thinking will be different to someone who isn't. I'm not completely crazy though hahaha xx

I think you should think very carefully about why you're doing this and how it might impact on you in the future.

You're setting serious alarm bells ringing with me.

I’d agree agree with this wholeheartedly!

Op - many people have mental health problems and I’m sure you’re not ‘completely crazy’ - but ethical non-monogamy/swinging/whatever you want to call it isn’t for everyone - and if you and your partner aren’t singing from exactly the same hymn sheet it’s a mine field!

You said you hate the idea of your partner looking at other women/pics of other women ‘in that way’ - but fab is a highly sexualised site full of explicit images - and full of temptations for everyone! It’s really no place for the jealous or insecure!

I’d strongly suggest you hide your profile for now and have a real think about whether this is something you can handle without damaging you in any way!

I'm not bothered about the photos on here you can't avoid them can you. And he's told me the pictures of women with their gash out are hanging, he prefers ladies that leave more to the imagination he said haha. It's more the fact I had the feeling he was looking for more and by changing the settings allowing people to contact us instead of actively approaching them. Hope that makes sense lol. "

So what did you mean when you said "the thought of him looking at other women makes me want to scream"?

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Kaitlyn - Maybe your spare cucumber would cheer OP up.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

I've removed some posts please don't mention drug use in the forum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pardon me for being so cynical, but this reeks of falseness.

However IF you guys are genuine, sounds like this is a very one sided relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kaitlyn - Maybe your spare cucumber would cheer OP up. "

I would happily donate it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I'm not sure how genuine this either.

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min "

100% open with him?

So... you told him you don't like doing it, and only do it to please him?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'm genuine just new to all this. Just wanted a bit of advice and somewhere to vent as it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears when bringing it up with the other half. Please don't judge me though we've all had to start somewhere. I should have mentioned from the start we don't do the whole full swap thing he has no interest in meeting other women or couples he's more interested in seeing me with other men. And from looking on this site there's a lot of couples that work like that so I don't see why I'm getting a hard time for it. We set it up so only men could contact us as it's what he's interested in and I'm happy to oblige. I was just slightly concerned when I was getting messages from women and other couples recently. Turns out our account had been fiddled with so those parties had been unblocked and our "looking for" included women and couples when that's not how we work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm genuine just new to all this. Just wanted a bit of advice and somewhere to vent as it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears when bringing it up with the other half. Please don't judge me though we've all had to start somewhere. I should have mentioned from the start we don't do the whole full swap thing he has no interest in meeting other women or couples he's more interested in seeing me with other men. And from looking on this site there's a lot of couples that work like that so I don't see why I'm getting a hard time for it. We set it up so only men could contact us as it's what he's interested in and I'm happy to oblige. I was just slightly concerned when I was getting messages from women and other couples recently. Turns out our account had been fiddled with so those parties had been unblocked and our "looking for" included women and couples when that's not how we work. "

Do you use Fab on your phone?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min

100% open with him?

So... you told him you don't like doing it, and only do it to please him? "

He knows I'd happily give this up but I am happy to go along with it. It's only nsa sex at the end of the day. I'm not being forced into it I can say no at anytime and he respects that

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for? "

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min

100% open with him?

So... you told him you don't like doing it, and only do it to please him?

He knows I'd happily give this up but I am happy to go along with it. It's only nsa sex at the end of the day. I'm not being forced into it I can say no at anytime and he respects that"

If that's the case then I really fail to see what the problem is - if you're getting messages from people you're not looking for then just delete them and/or block the people sending them.

Sorry but the more this has gone on the more I wonder how much this is a "look at me" thread.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm genuine just new to all this. Just wanted a bit of advice and somewhere to vent as it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears when bringing it up with the other half. Please don't judge me though we've all had to start somewhere. I should have mentioned from the start we don't do the whole full swap thing he has no interest in meeting other women or couples he's more interested in seeing me with other men. And from looking on this site there's a lot of couples that work like that so I don't see why I'm getting a hard time for it. We set it up so only men could contact us as it's what he's interested in and I'm happy to oblige. I was just slightly concerned when I was getting messages from women and other couples recently. Turns out our account had been fiddled with so those parties had been unblocked and our "looking for" included women and couples when that's not how we work.

Do you use Fab on your phone? "

Yeh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm genuine just new to all this. Just wanted a bit of advice and somewhere to vent as it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears when bringing it up with the other half. Please don't judge me though we've all had to start somewhere. I should have mentioned from the start we don't do the whole full swap thing he has no interest in meeting other women or couples he's more interested in seeing me with other men. And from looking on this site there's a lot of couples that work like that so I don't see why I'm getting a hard time for it. We set it up so only men could contact us as it's what he's interested in and I'm happy to oblige. I was just slightly concerned when I was getting messages from women and other couples recently. Turns out our account had been fiddled with so those parties had been unblocked and our "looking for" included women and couples when that's not how we work. "

It could be a misunderstanding. Your 'looking for' list is not the same as mail filters. If your list just says 'men', couples and women can still mail you.

Mail filters can be used to block women and couples from mailing you. You can't stop them from looking at your profile unless you hide it- then no-one can see it.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work. "

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min

100% open with him?

So... you told him you don't like doing it, and only do it to please him?

He knows I'd happily give this up but I am happy to go along with it. It's only nsa sex at the end of the day. I'm not being forced into it I can say no at anytime and he respects that

If that's the case then I really fail to see what the problem is - if you're getting messages from people you're not looking for then just delete them and/or block the people sending them.

Sorry but the more this has gone on the more I wonder how much this is a "look at me" thread."

Hardly a look at me thread, not everyone on here is an attention seeker and those words get thrown around a lot on these forums. I just wasn't expecting many people to pipe up.

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By *nvercoupleCouple
over a year ago

Inverness

Op you are contradicting yourself. You have said you are new to all this but have also said you do this once every few months and have also said you have been doing this for a year.

You said several hours ago you were going to stop the account but here you are still mailing and keeping the conversation going.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year."

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It all sounds a bit of a mess to be honest.

He sounds capable enough of making his own profile and looking at women on that if he wanted to, so at least he is doing it where you can see? (if it is indeed him changing things)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Changing your password will probably start a fight cause no doubt he will start accusing you of hidden things from him etc

I have absolutely nothing to hide I'm 100% open with him which is why I decided to give this a try. But you're all right, I'm deactivating this along with an angry text to him that I need to have a word cos he's at work at the min

100% open with him?

So... you told him you don't like doing it, and only do it to please him?

He knows I'd happily give this up but I am happy to go along with it. It's only nsa sex at the end of the day. I'm not being forced into it I can say no at anytime and he respects that

If that's the case then I really fail to see what the problem is - if you're getting messages from people you're not looking for then just delete them and/or block the people sending them.

Sorry but the more this has gone on the more I wonder how much this is a "look at me" thread.

Hardly a look at me thread, not everyone on here is an attention seeker and those words get thrown around a lot on these forums. I just wasn't expecting many people to pipe up. "

Oh I think you knew exactly what would happen and exactly what you're doing.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha) "

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens "

I think that's what the aim of this thread is!

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Op you are contradicting yourself. You have said you are new to all this but have also said you do this once every few months and have also said you have been doing this for a year.

You said several hours ago you were going to stop the account but here you are still mailing and keeping the conversation going. "

Yes every few months, but about 3 separate guys in total. My partners friend I'm also good friends with and he will visit every few months or so, sometimes we get frisky sometimes it's just a night in town. Read my other reply it explains it a bit clearer. The other 2, one sound as fuck the other I'd rather forget about haha

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me. "

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens

I think that's what the aim of this thread is! "

Could be

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens

I think that's what the aim of this thread is! "

No its really not otherwise I'd just upload a photo and watch the views roll in. I'm not that sad. Why is everyone on here so judgey I thought we were adults seems I'm just getting picked on now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens

I think that's what the aim of this thread is!

No its really not otherwise I'd just upload a photo and watch the views roll in. I'm not that sad. Why is everyone on here so judgey I thought we were adults seems I'm just getting picked on now "

You are not being picked on. You start a thread asking if people think your account has been hacked.

You then go into great detail about what you think your partner is up to. You are washing your dirty laundry in public so I'm not quite sure what you expected people to say to you or for people to take it seriously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id say hes shagging about

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/01/19 16:56:38]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm genuine just new to all this. Just wanted a bit of advice and somewhere to vent as it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears when bringing it up with the other half. Please don't judge me though we've all had to start somewhere. I should have mentioned from the start we don't do the whole full swap thing he has no interest in meeting other women or couples he's more interested in seeing me with other men. And from looking on this site there's a lot of couples that work like that so I don't see why I'm getting a hard time for it. We set it up so only men could contact us as it's what he's interested in and I'm happy to oblige. I was just slightly concerned when I was getting messages from women and other couples recently. Turns out our account had been fiddled with so those parties had been unblocked and our "looking for" included women and couples when that's not how we work.

Do you use Fab on your phone?

Yeh "

Could someone else get hold of your phone?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK "

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK "

Whose is it?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I do t understand why someone would hack a Fab account to open up your filters? But, if that’s what’s happening fine, let’s go with that.

So do you feel any better or any clearer of your trust with your husband who your doing all this for?

No I've come to the conclusion it was him messing with it and he won't admit it. No biggy now but to start with I felt a bit mugged off. We don't do this a lot at all, in the year we've been doing this only met 2 or 3 lads so it's hardly a lifestyle or anything. Now everyone else is looking too deeply into this and I should have kept my gob shut and given him a bollocking when he's back from work.

In the two weeks you've had this profile you have two meet veris which suggests a bit more than 2 or 3 in a year.

Nice to know you're having a snoop on my page lol, but yes there's only been a few. The black guy which I mentioned before who's actually a good friend of my partners and 2 on here (but one of them I don't really like to count cos it was a bit awkward haha)

He's not snooping, I'm sure many have had a look, at your profile, that's what happens

I think that's what the aim of this thread is!

No its really not otherwise I'd just upload a photo and watch the views roll in. I'm not that sad. Why is everyone on here so judgey I thought we were adults seems I'm just getting picked on now "

I don't think anyone is judging, it's just your story seems to have changed somewhat since the original post and contradicts itself as others have pointed out.

As I said much further up, something doesn't add up here and people are ultimately expressing their opinions based on what has been said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Id say hes shagging about"

I can see why you would think this but then if he was only a complete idiot would use a couples profile that his partner could access rather than create another secret one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

"

Its one of the other lads we had round.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Whose is it? "

Curiouser and curiouser! Knew there with something fishy going on that’s why I brought it up.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK "

So it shouldn't be in your pics, one of you, or part of you, should be in any pics you post

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round. "

People always take photos of others that they've met on here and upload them. I guess he's a bit more discreet than I am

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

So it shouldn't be in your pics, one of you, or part of you, should be in any pics you post "

I don't understand what you would gain by putting another man's cock on your profile pictures.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Something smells fishy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round.

People always take photos of others that they've met on here and upload them. I guess he's a bit more discreet than I am "

It's against site rules because at least one of you has to be in the photo. I think you have made an error by publicly admitting this

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round. "

What, the full frontal, just a bloke and no one else? in your pics? Does he know sounds...bizarre. But then the whole thread got weirder as I read.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round.

People always take photos of others that they've met on here and upload them. I guess he's a bit more discreet than I am "

Yes, but one of you has to be in that photo, according to rules

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

So it shouldn't be in your pics, one of you, or part of you, should be in any pics you post

I don't understand what you would gain by putting another man's cock on your profile pictures. "

I've seen plenty of profiles on here which contain photos of neither part of the couple when we first set this up. So why shouldn't we

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round.

People always take photos of others that they've met on here and upload them. I guess he's a bit more discreet than I am

Yes, but one of you has to be in that photo, according to rules "

Well fuck me it'll get deleted then,

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

So it shouldn't be in your pics, one of you, or part of you, should be in any pics you post

I don't understand what you would gain by putting another man's cock on your profile pictures.

I've seen plenty of profiles on here which contain photos of neither part of the couple when we first set this up. So why shouldn't we "

It doesn't make it right though, does it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People would assume the penis is your husband. You’re not looking for women or couples ergo no need for pics of the husband to be on the profile page.

Even when I uploaded of picture of my roast potatoes, my breast and nipple was in the shot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Opened a can of worms here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got a feeling we are being wound up and that by the end of the day this profile will be unlos.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is this for real? Really? Reaaaaaaaallly?

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

Well then why do you have a photo of another man's cock on your profile?

Its one of the other lads we had round.

People always take photos of others that they've met on here and upload them. I guess he's a bit more discreet than I am

Yes, but one of you has to be in that photo, according to rules

Well fuck me it'll get deleted then, "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've got a feeling we are being wound up and that by the end of the day this profile will be unlos."

Gone like a fart in the wind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've got a feeling we are being wound up and that by the end of the day this profile will be unlos.

Gone like a fart in the wind. "

I've never had that saying but it made me giggle.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"I've got a feeling we are being wound up and that by the end of the day this profile will be unlos."

Well it's past a couple of hours on a cold Sunday afternoon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/01/19 17:10:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could this be the first case of a phantom husband in a couples profile

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex


"So what have we all achieved today?

Your husband has a very nice penis I bet he’d love to fuck me.

Its not even his cock but OK

So it shouldn't be in your pics, one of you, or part of you, should be in any pics you post

I don't understand what you would gain by putting another man's cock on your profile pictures.

I've seen plenty of profiles on here which contain photos of neither part of the couple when we first set this up. So why shouldn't we "

The photo rules are quite clear

https://www.fabswingers.com/articles/photo-rules

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Could this be the first case of a phantom husband in a couples profile "

That would be a 1st xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Something smells fishy "

Fish?

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Something smells fishy

Fish? "

A red herring ?

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