FabSwingers.com forum: Cup of tea consent video

By *veragecouple321 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leamington Spa

Has any body seen this video, this video was shown to my daughter at college, and is being shown at colleges and higher education establishments all around the UK, really it's meant to be serious, I just can't believe we teach this stuff to 17/18year olds, surely they should know this all ready.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'd think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

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By *wned EmCouple
over a year ago

nuneaton

I think its great. Very simplistic and easy for even young children to understand. I can imagine teenagers might find it annoying though

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By *veragecouple321 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leamington Spa

Surely by the time they are shown the video, 99% of them are all ready sexually active, I think the age they are shown this, it is just too late.

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By *hedevilwearspradaWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere nearby

It’s more than 17/18 year olds that need to see it, unfortunately.

It’s a great video.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My 14 year old son was shown that video at school just before Christmas break. Great source of hilarity for him & his wee pals. Apparently they spent that whole lunchtime trying to force feed each other while in stitches

I'm not sure if they 'got' it? So I went over it again with him just to be sure!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!"

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

The only thing I wonder about is..... are you expected to get written consent or actually ask the question..... ‘do you want sex’ ..... ‘yes I would like sex’?... takes the whole spontaneity out of it.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

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By *veragecouple321 OP Couple
over a year ago

Leamington Spa

Why do we have to treat young adults like babies. It's aimed at the wrong age and why can't we just call it SEX Omg what a bad bad word. Ffs we are still talking to our kids as if they are an alien species. What happened to open honesty.

Mrs

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

Do you need written consent to make someone a cup of tea?

And whilst you don't need to ask in explicit terms, the foolish people who made the video must have assumed that people talk to each other before sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s more than 17/18 year olds that need to see it, unfortunately.

It’s a great video."

So true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s more than 17/18 year olds that need to see it, unfortunately.

It’s a great video."

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By *ade and VanessaCouple
over a year ago

Central Scotland

You'd hope. Seems like my 3 year old has a better grasp of the concept than some adults though

V x

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By *ade and VanessaCouple
over a year ago

Central Scotland

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

Do you need written consent to make someone a cup of tea?

And whilst you don't need to ask in explicit terms, the foolish people who made the video must have assumed that people talk to each other before sex.

Wow this is concerning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do we have to treat young adults like babies. It's aimed at the wrong age and why can't we just call it SEX Omg what a bad bad word. Ffs we are still talking to our kids as if they are an alien species. What happened to open honesty.

Mrs"

I think you might have misunderstood - the video explains the concept of consent, not sex as such. My understanding is that it wasn't designed specifically for kids. I'm not doing a very good job here- watch it to see what it's all about

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By *idsBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Tamworth

Fantastic video and explained in the most quintessentially British way possible

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

Mrs"

Because if we call it sex, the boys will be sniggering.

And the parents will complain.

And from complaints I've seen about clubs on the forums, perhaps videos about consent should be amended to include "if you see a couple drinking tea, don't try to share the teapot, unless they invite you."

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By *ade and VanessaCouple
over a year ago

Central Scotland

Mrs

Agreed. The analogy has been going around for a while and isn't specifically for young people. Just for anyone struggling with the concept of consent. Worryingly, there seems to be a few people on here who are.

V x

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

I used it with a group of offenders. Some clearly don't understand the concept of consent otherwise they wouldn't have been offenders.

It worked really well. Broke one of them, first time he'd ever admitted to what he did.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

If both parties can’t give consent - only one can, and there is sex, then one of them has been r*aped. Simple.

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By *entish79Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Mrs"

I suppose the sad truth is that too many young guys seem to struggle with the notion of consent when it comes to sex.

The video might not be able to legislate for people still not taking it seriously, or how it might still all go out the window if alcohol is involved. But nonetheless it gets the message across in a great way I think, and rams home the idea that the idea of consent is, in fact, pretty clear. By highlighting just how absurd it would be to pour tea down someone, you’d hope the message would sink in to some where it maybe hadn’t before. Which can only be a good thing surely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think any age is too late, based on the amount of grown adults who just don't get it.

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By *s_macWoman
over a year ago

Traffic land

Mrs"

I think you’re missing the point. It was created to show people how you wouldn’t coerce/force people to have a cup of tea and therefore you shouldn’t to have sex either.

It was created for teenagers either. Sadly some fully grown men who should know better, still behave in an incredibly entitled manner with regard to sex

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

It’s a great video which puts the idea of consent in basic terms accessible to all. A great idea. It’s covered in PSHE in secondary schools from year 8 I think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually think it's brilliant. There is another one called consent for kids which I think is really good because it helps young people understand its up to them what they do with their bodies

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I don't think any age is too late, based on the amount of grown adults who just don't get it."

Isn't this the sad truth. I think the videos are fantastic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

If both parties can’t give consent - only one can, and there is sex, then one of them has been r*aped. Simple. "

Yeah, true. It’s a very good video that puts the idea of consent into simple terms that hopefully all people can understand and may go along way to preventing situations where people are having sex without their consent.

I have been in a club once where the woman from a cpl has been out of her face and the husband has been encouraging guys to have sex with her.....awful thing for him to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people on fab need to watch it and understand what is being said.

Unfortunately like the "so I'm wanking on the M1 at 70 miles an hour, where's the harm?" even this simple analogy will be lost on those who believe they have the right to have sex with whoever they want whenever they want.

Just because you bought tea bags, doesn't mean you want tea that evening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people on fab need to watch it and understand what is being said.

Just because you bought tea bags, doesn't mean you want tea that evening"

Good analogy here.

I think some of the guys that I’ve seen in clubs sometimes need to bear this in mind. Sometimes their actions are shameful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sadly, some people do need it to be spelt out to them. I've seen the video and I think it's superb!

Yeah I’ve seen it and I think it puts the whole idea of consenting sex into perspective and puts it in a very good way.

A good way to get the message across.

Also, what happens if both parties are d*unk and are not in a stable position to give their consent?

Last woman I was with as things were getting heated she stopped and told me she wanted to have sex with me, it was so hot and intimate. It took our sex to another level for me. I know it won't be the same for all, but it really didn't stall proceedings at all

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The clarity that is needed to understand the concept of consent is really important as many people are still confused or are wrong. We should have great sex education today, alongside great consent and relationship education - the mature world has great knowledge. It is sinful to deny younger people the benefits of our expertise. I think it's part justification to having schools that receive public funds fully under the control of local councils and out of religious interference.

We still have a very long way to go to get the right understanding of consent and how to communicate. It's vital in groups where some don't have the confidence to establish and maintain personal boundaries.

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By *orwegian BlueMan
over a year ago

Iceland, but Aldi is closer..

The video was aimed at all people and not just those that have the common sense to realise that sexual consent is, well, common sense..

This video was produced by several years ago and has been doing the rounds a while and as with anything like this, the inevitably parody is made..

Search on YouTube for tea slut and you should find it..

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