FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Not my type sorry

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Sometimes I reply with a no thankyou with their name if they've said it and don't ever recall getting abuse. I don't give a reason just a no thankyou,sometimes I'll get one back saying thankyou for the reply.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had 3 negative responses and two were because I was in a mood when they messaged (quite late at night), and I was a bit sarcastic in my reply.

That's out of hundreds-possibly a thousand-messages I've replied to.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Maybe the guy's messaging me think they're chancing their arm as well...joke!!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Only once I've had abuse for saying that, and he came back later and apologised

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

I don't think it's mad either,I think there's more civilised people on here than abusive idiots.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ulfilthmentMan
over a year ago

Just around the corner

I only ever say thank you for replying. Life’s too short, and we can’t be everyone’s cup of tea.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not as of yet

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had any abusive messages from men.

Women on the other hand ...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

Never. I mostly get thanked for replying.

I don’t get abuse or bullied (seems to be the latest buzz word). I’m polite and clear and it works for me so I will carry on that way

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a few abusive replies where they've gone with the whole 'you're a fat bitch anyway' but generally people are polite about it xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just blocked someone who couldn't take a hint. Really really annoying

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not as of yet"

I have never had abuse but they have tried to convince me that a BJ off them will be the best I have had or requested a full frontal pic

I just said you will have to make do with my public pics

As you might of guessed it was guys messaging me

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Unlike other groups and platforms I always find everyone rather friendly on here x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would never message you op as I know I ain't got no chance lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't give it get it. We usually give a polite no thanks, if not for us and usually get a polite no thanks if were not for them. There again we don't allow single males in our filters so it may be a skewed response. male

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down."

Probably comes from a dented ego. More common if they deem themselves to be too good for the woman they’re messaging yet still get turned down.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down."

Frustration and bruised ego maybe.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eal Deal PartiesWoman
over a year ago

x


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

Daily.. about 12/15 guys!! I just block now

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down.

Probably comes from a dented ego. More common if they deem themselves to be too good for the woman they’re messaging yet still get turned down. "

I have witnessed a few over the years, my mrs got some right nasty replies when she had politely turned guys down, it’s amazing how quick they change from all compliments to wishing death on you

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down.

Probably comes from a dented ego. More common if they deem themselves to be too good for the woman they’re messaging yet still get turned down. "

Do you deem yourself to good for the men that you are turning down?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rkeb3Man
over a year ago

east Lancashire road

I had 2 couples

I don't like thier profile

And they start calling me names that I am desperate can't get a gf or wife is just laughed n blocked them

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a few. Turned a guy down. Because I knew he had met MsF on her profile and she was talking about meeting him again. He then decided she was too fat.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just don't reply. Only had abuse once and that was on the forum

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

In fairness find most are accepting when we reply with sorry not our type etc.

Maybe we’ve been lucky?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *an and wifeyCouple
over a year ago

n lincs

Think we've been on fab about 6 ish years now wifey doesn't respond to messages as doesn't know what to say but I usually will reply with a polite 'not what we're looking for at this time' or similar and think we've only may be had 2 ranting replies and 1 was off a guy who thought he recognised wifey pics and worked with her. I assured him politely he was mistaken which he was thank God lol lol few more abusive messages so straight to the block button we're here for fun and a good time not to fall out with people

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I just don't get why guys have to be abusive if they get turned down.

Probably comes from a dented ego. More common if they deem themselves to be too good for the woman they’re messaging yet still get turned down.

Do you deem yourself to good for the men that you are turning down?"

No I didn’t believe in leagues. I like certain features that other women possibly don’t find attractive in men like big fuck off bushy eyebrows.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

I suggest it often.. those that suffer and complain of abuse or inappropriate messages should block those gender(s) and search themselves. Very few of those that complain seem to change the filters. Strange that.

Only had one abusive message that was from a lady (lady in a very loose sense of the word)

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!

Daily.. about 12/15 guys!! I just block now

"

Yeah our block button is getting a work out today. creepy, do these methods actually work?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had abuse for saying no either. Just the opposite actually. (Perhaps they were relieved!)

Had a few abusive messages as first messages though; perhaps 3 or 4 of those.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just say a simple no thanks or dont answer back at all ..it will save you grief ...also look at your local status's and you get to see the guys and gals that consantly moan about not getting meets or not getting any luck or worse getting nasty with status like ''your all cunts on ere'' and also name and shame in there status saying timewasters because you've said no thanks, i just randomly put them on my block list to save me if they deciede to message in the future .... if you cant handel rejection then you should not be on a swingers site or in a swingers club or in the lifestyle at all...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don't think it's mad either,I think there's more civilised people on here than abusive idiots."

I've never used the exact words in the title. But I always give a reason and have very rarely ever had abuse. Mostly thank you/ nice replies.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary

Ladies form a queue...take a ticket and i'll reply in good time...i might just delete all the messages...

In fairness a response even if it is rejection is better than a message just left on read...at the same time i suppose some of the folks on here get loads of messages so cant possibly respond to all of them

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads "

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had abuse three times in 9 years

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reply with a thanks for messaging me but no type of response

I’ve had probably no more than 6 abusive messages this year

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me. "

People generally only like it when people loathe themselves. Woman says I’m too fat, guy can swoop in and say you’re not fat lovely, come here I’ll shag you. What can they do to someone who’s reasonably attractive with a decent figure, nothing

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me. "

If you can’t love yourself who else ever will?

Nothing wrong with a bit of self loving anyhow

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

People generally only like it when people loathe themselves. Woman says I’m too fat, guy can swoop in and say you’re not fat lovely, come here I’ll shag you. What can they do to someone who’s reasonably attractive with a decent figure, nothing "

Good point.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I always reply with a ‘thank you for your message but not what I’m looking - have fun’

9 out of 10 say thanks for the reply but some keep coming back.

My big bare is when they come back with ‘what you looking for then?’

It’s normally from the ones with zero info on their own profile - you know the ‘fill in later’ ones

I do say really clearly in mine what I’m looking for

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow get over yourself

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

People generally only like it when people loathe themselves. Woman says I’m too fat, guy can swoop in and say you’re not fat lovely, come here I’ll shag you. What can they do to someone who’s reasonably attractive with a decent figure, nothing "

So it's only fat women that get abuse,they can't think of anything more intelligent to say?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me. "

I love humility.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always reply with a ‘thank you for your message but not what I’m looking - have fun’

9 out of 10 say thanks for the reply but some keep coming back.

My big bare is when they come back with ‘what you looking for then?’

It’s normally from the ones with zero info on their own profile - you know the ‘fill in later’ ones

I do say really clearly in mine what I’m looking for "

I tell them I'm looking for a man I feel attracted to. They accept that and move on.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante

Extremely rare for us to receive abusive messages.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to get a lot of abuse when sending/ replying to messages.

Probably because I'm in costa with my hand down my pants trying to masturbate and type at the same time.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With every passing thread you post I'm thinking your ego will be enough to love yourself whether you get abuse or not

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"With every passing thread you post I'm thinking your ego will be enough to love yourself whether you get abuse or not "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads "

Why?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ycra loutMan
over a year ago

york/Scarborough

With the "No thankyou's" that I get..I just reply with a thankyou for letting me know..am I just too polite even when I'm disappointed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I get a message saying not for me I just reply and say thanks for letting me know.

On the few occasions I've sent the you're not for me message to ladies the amount of abuse I've received is unreal.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"If I get a message saying not for me I just reply and say thanks for letting me know.

On the few occasions I've sent the you're not for me message to ladies the amount of abuse I've received is unreal. "

That doesn’t surprise me tbh .. I think men on here accept the rejection far better than women from what other guys have said about their personal experiences

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

I’ve had too many times to count but I’m fat so they have an “easy” go to “insult”

I say it in air quotes because after the 100th time of hearing fat insults it becomes white noise you just think “yeah yeah got anything a bit more original”

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ily Con CarneTV/TS
over a year ago

Cornwall

some come back with .."why" though

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

Anyone says this to you is obviously either a twat or bloody blind!!

Your gorgeous

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I tend to get a lot of abuse when sending/ replying to messages.

Probably because I'm in costa with my hand down my pants trying to masturbate and type at the same time."

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If everybody looked the same and were attracted to the same features life would be hella boring.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the rare occasion that I do get a reply I'm always polite. It might change their initial impression of me, but also you never know if things may change in the future - looking for single or smooth men now, but interested in married or hairy men next year.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve had too many times to count but I’m fat so they have an “easy” go to “insult”

I say it in air quotes because after the 100th time of hearing fat insults it becomes white noise you just think “yeah yeah got anything a bit more original” "

It's not an insult, it's a compliment. Always see it that way. They wanted to fuck you. They're hurt you said no. The worse the insult the greater the compliment.

If you say no and there's no insult, maybe they weren't that bothered about fucking you at all. x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I’ve had too many times to count but I’m fat so they have an “easy” go to “insult”

I say it in air quotes because after the 100th time of hearing fat insults it becomes white noise you just think “yeah yeah got anything a bit more original”

It's not an insult, it's a compliment. Always see it that way. They wanted to fuck you. They're hurt you said no. The worse the insult the greater the compliment.

If you say no and there's no insult, maybe they weren't that bothered about fucking you at all. x"

Just another good reason to have the word insult in air quotes then

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

People generally only like it when people loathe themselves. Woman says I’m too fat, guy can swoop in and say you’re not fat lovely, come here I’ll shag you. What can they do to someone who’s reasonably attractive with a decent figure, nothing

So it's only fat women that get abuse,they can't think of anything more intelligent to say?"

No this part of the thread is a sub section that has nothing to do with the original comment. I don’t mean only fat women get abusive messages.

I was using the example of how guys like to swoop in with reassurance whenever someone puts themselves down, most common example is women thinking they are fat.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve only ever had an abussive message once. She wasn’t happy about being turned down I guess

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

I block before they have a chance to reply back with abuse. You know a lot will. I used to just delete but they keep on messaging. Strangely at times messaging back right away acting as if they've never messaged before.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

People generally only like it when people loathe themselves. Woman says I’m too fat, guy can swoop in and say you’re not fat lovely, come here I’ll shag you. What can they do to someone who’s reasonably attractive with a decent figure, nothing

So it's only fat women that get abuse,they can't think of anything more intelligent to say?

No this part of the thread is a sub section that has nothing to do with the original comment. I don’t mean only fat women get abusive messages.

I was using the example of how guys like to swoop in with reassurance whenever someone puts themselves down, most common example is women thinking they are fat. "

When I let men know I'm fat (just in case they haven't realised ) they think I'm putting myself down and tell me to love myself blah blah. I'm just letting them know so they don't have a shock when my belly falls out

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve had too many times to count but I’m fat so they have an “easy” go to “insult”

I say it in air quotes because after the 100th time of hearing fat insults it becomes white noise you just think “yeah yeah got anything a bit more original”

It's not an insult, it's a compliment. Always see it that way. They wanted to fuck you. They're hurt you said no. The worse the insult the greater the compliment.

If you say no and there's no insult, maybe they weren't that bothered about fucking you at all. x"

Yup, they were scraping the bottom of the barrel and relieved they were turned down.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

I've had a few that have made me chuckle.

Always amuses me how some people handle or rather, can't handhe rejection.

The most recent was a guy who sent me multiple messages over about 3hrs, I wasn't online at the time, read them, checked profile, wasn't intrested, so deleted.

Next message, another 'you're stunning' I replied thanking him for his messages, but wasn't looking to meet anyone right now.

I then got back, thst he was actually glad, as he'd had chance to have a better look at my pics, and I was a bit too old & rough around the edges.

Then wished me luck in finding someone who's want to shag that!

Almost had me crying into my coffee

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you"

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you""

And then they block you before you can reply !!

Frustrating isn’t it

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve had too many times to count but I’m fat so they have an “easy” go to “insult”

I say it in air quotes because after the 100th time of hearing fat insults it becomes white noise you just think “yeah yeah got anything a bit more original”

It's not an insult, it's a compliment. Always see it that way. They wanted to fuck you. They're hurt you said no. The worse the insult the greater the compliment.

If you say no and there's no insult, maybe they weren't that bothered about fucking you at all. x

Yup, they were scraping the bottom of the barrel and relieved they were turned down. "

Exactly. But some people see that as an insult too, I don't. Someone may think they're scraping the bottom of the barrel to meet me. I'm ok with that because they're entitled to their opinion.

NN (an ex forumite) had a great way of looking at it. That hot person thinks I'm an ugly barrel. Who's the loser? Not me - I'm fucking a hot person!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you"

And then they block you before you can reply !!

Frustrating isn’t it "

That's excatly what they done

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sent a sorry not for us reply yesterday and got a dozen messages back asking why?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually like when a woman takes the time to reply even if its a polite no just nice to get a response, i never take it badly as im not most womens cup of tea anyway lol x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you"

And then they block you before you can reply !!

Frustrating isn’t it

That's excatly what they done"

Happened to me many times lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

I’ve used that reason and then block instantly as I’ve bad abuse previously! Some men here think we are just here to entertain them......

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I actually like when a woman takes the time to reply even if its a polite no just nice to get a response, i never take it badly as im not most womens cup of tea anyway lol x "

We think every nice message deserves a nice reply if it is a no thankyou. Manners cost nothing

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you"

And then they block you before you can reply !!

Frustrating isn’t it "
....

Which is why I always think . Is there a need to reply ? Especially if no effort was put into the message...we reply to about 50% and say why in a polite way.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had abusive messages for saying no thank you.. I don't bother replying now..

If a message interests me I respond, if not delete

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

Dont rise to the bait .... ignore and block ... why waste your time

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've had abusive messages for saying no thank you.. I don't bother replying now..

If a message interests me I respond, if not delete "

Has it really now reached a point where a woman simply does not lift a finger of effort to meet a guy

It’s all down to the chaps ?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I actually like when a woman takes the time to reply even if its a polite no just nice to get a response, i never take it badly as im not most womens cup of tea anyway lol x

We think every nice message deserves a nice reply if it is a no thankyou. Manners cost nothing"

I always try and put effort into a message never just one of these 1 or 2 line messages and i always try and include something that has been mentioned in the profile to make it more personal and show iv actually read the profile

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why abuse anyone don't understand it I get knock back all I reply is take care

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why"

I'd go easy on all that mate...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why"

And how many of them reply giving you a reason after that?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've had abusive messages for saying no thank you.. I don't bother replying now..

If a message interests me I respond, if not delete

Has it really now reached a point where a woman simply does not lift a finger of effort to meet a guy

It’s all down to the chaps ?"

It hurts to be rejected or ignored. Why would a woman put herself through that when she can feel good from having many messages asking to fuck her?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

I can go from being gorgeous with great curves to being a fat slag that no one would want to shag in the space of two messages.

Funny how a ‘not my type’ can invoke such a response.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why

And how many of them reply giving you a reason after that? "

Most do I don’t ask nastily it’s phrased to be constructive, how am I to better myself as a person if I can’t learn from my own mistakes and improve

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I've had abusive messages for saying no thank you.. I don't bother replying now..

If a message interests me I respond, if not delete

Has it really now reached a point where a woman simply does not lift a finger of effort to meet a guy

It’s all down to the chaps ?"

In my case, yes. But, once we're taking I put a lot of work into establishing we are right for each other. It's not a case of 'I've replied, so I'm going to have sex with you'

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why"

Just a heads up Incase this thread hasn’t already given it away already

Asking why is bloody annoying

They don’t owe you anything that includes an explanation so just take it on the chin

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why

Just a heads up Incase this thread hasn’t already given it away already

Asking why is bloody annoying

They don’t owe you anything that includes an explanation so just take it on the chin"

Fair enough, I think it’s just the way my mind works if something doesn’t work why not? But if it really annoys people then I won’t do it anymore thanks for informing me

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why

And how many of them reply giving you a reason after that?

Most do I don’t ask nastily it’s phrased to be constructive, how am I to better myself as a person if I can’t learn from my own mistakes and improve "

That surprises me, I used to reply to the "why" messages but most people just used it to keep the conversation going even though they knew I wasn't interested, so I don't anymore. And if it's that you're too young, or not hot enough, you can't really change those things so what's the use in knowing? Anyway thats a whole other thread

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"If my message gets read and I get nothing not even a sorry not my type I get a stab of annoyance but I will block the person as I’m clearly not what they want and then move on

If I get a message back saying sorry not my type I’ll apologise for wasting their time but will ask what the reason is, like is it I’m young or just not hot enough so at least I can understand why

Just a heads up Incase this thread hasn’t already given it away already

Asking why is bloody annoying

They don’t owe you anything that includes an explanation so just take it on the chin

Fair enough, I think it’s just the way my mind works if something doesn’t work why not? But if it really annoys people then I won’t do it anymore thanks for informing me "

We all tick in different ways but that’s part of the problem

Look at it this way whatever The reason they don’t want to meet you, counld be the very reason why others actually do want to. If you then changed to “match” what the person that rejected wanted then you missing out on a potential meet further down the line

Just be you and don’t worry what others think x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *trongbobMan
over a year ago

rochester

I just don't any replies at all, simple

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

Flagrante


"We said no politely 3 or 4 times to someone and thier closing message to us was "I hope your slut leaves you"

And then they block you before you can reply !!

Frustrating isn’t it "

Yep, not only twats but cowardly twats.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? "

And this, I suspect is one of the reasons so many single men are convinced they are looked down upon by the female and couple population of Fab.

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the O P has a point actually. The reason I say this is several times I've had abuse when I said no thank you. And they have always been a long the lines of, "someone like you can't turn someone like me down" or " well I was desperate so I thought I'd try you". There seems to be a bit of an undertone recently on some threads that suggest that some women are perceived "easier"than others. I'm quoting from another thread " bigger women are easier targets". Don't get me wrong the vast majority of messages I receive are lovely and very respectful, and the majority of men on this site wouldn't dream of speaking to a woman like that.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no?

And this, I suspect is one of the reasons so many single men are convinced they are looked down upon by the female and couple population of Fab.

A

"

I literally never bother messaging anyone unless we've spoken before. To me it's pissing in the wind so now I socialise using the forum

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just recieving a reply to a message is an achievement in many cases, be it abusive or not.

The comment about "chancing your arm", well are we all not chancing our arm on an initial message.?. Nobody can know if the first message will even be read by the recipiant, let alone replied too

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t respond delete and block simpls

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never had abuse for saying no thanks. Only ever when I don't respond.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xelf787Man
over a year ago

Chorlton, Manchester

There is no point getting abusive if someone says "Not my type"! Thing is they are only responding to one message and trying to deem you by your profile. I have met the same ladies afterwards in a club and I was def their type!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often get this response. Which is a fair comment.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply "

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xelf787Man
over a year ago

Chorlton, Manchester


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

"

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

"

Tbh probably not but if I read a message and it's from someone who's taken the time to read my profile I will always answer it back, I've written messages to females conforming to their profile and never received a reply which I find rude, it only takes a second to say thanks but no thanks.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

"

True I really don’t want to spend at least an hour and half (minimum) writing no thanks after working a 9 hour shift being out of the house for 11hours with travel time, coming home doing hours of chores/mum duties, when I could have spent that hour and half arranging a meet with someone I do like if I’ve got time to meet after doing all that

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!"

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xelf787Man
over a year ago

Chorlton, Manchester


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it "

Yes I understand which is why I didn't spit my dummy out when you didn't reply to me lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it "

Oh the joys of being a female on fab lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

Why the drama? The tools are there to stop any of that, respond with a “no thank you” then block, it saves you from all the abusive replies and the “why not” question

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

Yes I understand which is why I didn't spit my dummy out when you didn't reply to me lol "

Good man

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it "

Also non site supporters only have a 100 message limit per day so it would be mathematically impossible for some to reply to all

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

I think when you reject a woman it's a bigger shock for them as it doesn't happen to them as often as to most guys. I've had the odd bad reaction.

Despite what my profile says women don't generally ask me for meets anymore anyway as I'm seen as "taken", but if I do need to I just get Red to politely say thanks but no thanks for me

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

"

If that was me I would manage my message filters better

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

It is harder to say “sorry, not my type” to a woman. Maybe that’s because most men on here are ‘less selective’ and wouldn’t turn down anything with a pulse. I’ll chat to anyone - some women don’t take it lying down (pun intended!)

But we can’t be attracted to, or attractive to, everyone.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

If that was me I would manage my message filters better "

For Hot pic regulars that’s unfortunately still the case with message filters in place

They could easily block everyone but then they’re accused of just being egotistcal and only looking for fabs on their pics when they should be here to fuck

Moral of the story you can’t please everyone so don’t try just do things your way only

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

Oh the joys of being a female on fab lol "

Yep !!

A woman can put a profile up , no text and have no pics at all but will receive hundreds of messages instantly telling her how amazing she is

The reason men don’t receive as many messages is because women on the whole get so much attention that reading our inbox takes up most of the time haha

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"I've had abusive messages for saying no thank you.. I don't bother replying now..

If a message interests me I respond, if not delete

Has it really now reached a point where a woman simply does not lift a finger of effort to meet a guy

It’s all down to the chaps ?

It hurts to be rejected or ignored. Why would a woman put herself through that when she can feel good from having many messages asking to fuck her?"

Many messages asking to fuck me do not make me feel good lol! I need a damn good fucking for that.....

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xelf787Man
over a year ago

Chorlton, Manchester


"

Yep !!

A woman can put a profile up , no text and have no pics at all but will receive hundreds of messages instantly telling her how amazing she is

The reason men don’t receive as many messages is because women on the whole get so much attention that reading our inbox takes up most of the time haha

"

Think you need a sexcretary

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

"

And this is why i wouldn't message chance ya got ffs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

Oh the joys of being a female on fab lol

Yep !!

A woman can put a profile up , no text and have no pics at all but will receive hundreds of messages instantly telling her how amazing she is

The reason men don’t receive as many messages is because women on the whole get so much attention that reading our inbox takes up most of the time haha

"

With all the hardships that go with being female on here - overloaded inboxes, unwanted attention, rude replys, people not reading profiles, men chancing their arm when they're unsuitable......... I wonder why more women don't just block all incoming messages and take a proactive stance?

Surely this would be a more efficient use of time, cut down the odds of missing a good match because their message is sandwiched between shite and enable the female population to enjoy the site more?

Is there a specific reason most don't do this? Genuinely interested?

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You cannot win either way I learned that so I don’t reply at all or block.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

Oh the joys of being a female on fab lol

Yep !!

A woman can put a profile up , no text and have no pics at all but will receive hundreds of messages instantly telling her how amazing she is

The reason men don’t receive as many messages is because women on the whole get so much attention that reading our inbox takes up most of the time haha

With all the hardships that go with being female on here - overloaded inboxes, unwanted attention, rude replys, people not reading profiles, men chancing their arm when they're unsuitable......... I wonder why more women don't just block all incoming messages and take a proactive stance?

Surely this would be a more efficient use of time, cut down the odds of missing a good match because their message is sandwiched between shite and enable the female population to enjoy the site more?

Is there a specific reason most don't do this? Genuinely interested?

A"

I’ve had meets with men who have messaged me and who I never would have messaged a few. Why punish a gender just for the act of a few?

OP - I’ve had a few abusive messages, from men and women. I just ignore and do a bulk delete weekly now

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"I am the opposite then as I get around 20-30 messages a day and answer every one of them, the way I see it is if someone has taken the time to write me a message then I should find the time to reply back to them, even if it's a polite no thanks you're my type, I think it's rude not to reply

Would you still reply to everyone if you got 100+ messages a day every day for 5 years ?

And putting a pic up could generate 1000+ messages in one day ?

Only 1000? I would think with your hot pics it would be double that!!

Haha

That’s what most women have on a regular basis on here. It’s impossible to reply to all.

Saying it’s rude not to reply is easy to say when you only have to reply to a few messages isn’t it

Oh the joys of being a female on fab lol

Yep !!

A woman can put a profile up , no text and have no pics at all but will receive hundreds of messages instantly telling her how amazing she is

The reason men don’t receive as many messages is because women on the whole get so much attention that reading our inbox takes up most of the time haha

With all the hardships that go with being female on here - overloaded inboxes, unwanted attention, rude replys, people not reading profiles, men chancing their arm when they're unsuitable......... I wonder why more women don't just block all incoming messages and take a proactive stance?

Surely this would be a more efficient use of time, cut down the odds of missing a good match because their message is sandwiched between shite and enable the female population to enjoy the site more?

Is there a specific reason most don't do this? Genuinely interested?

A

I’ve had meets with men who have messaged me and who I never would have messaged a few. Why punish a gender just for the act of a few?

OP - I’ve had a few abusive messages, from men and women. I just ignore and do a bulk delete weekly now "

Exactly this

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice. "

Everyone deserves respect

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"

Surely this would be a more efficient use of time, cut down the odds of missing a good match because their message is sandwiched between shite and enable the female population to enjoy the site more?

Is there a specific reason most don't do this? Genuinely interested?

A"

I find it way too depressing trawling through male profiles, which are on the whole dreadful, and make me see things I really didn't want to see!! I get fed up with it VERY quickly every time I've tried it, and have never found any hidden gems anyway, I get much better prospects finding me.

I also meet younger men and will never presume someone wants to meet older (dating sites don't state preferences), so it just cuts down the time wasted if they messaged me first.

I don't moan about messages - I have good filters up, and I find if I delete messages unread if people are not compatible I don't get any abuse either.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice.

Everyone deserves respect "

This

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is no point getting abusive if someone says "Not my type"! Thing is they are only responding to one message and trying to deem you by your profile. I have met the same ladies afterwards in a club and I was def their type!! "

That's a great point well made!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *xelf787Man
over a year ago

Chorlton, Manchester


"There is no point getting abusive if someone says "Not my type"! Thing is they are only responding to one message and trying to deem you by your profile. I have met the same ladies afterwards in a club and I was def their type!!

That's a great point well made! "

Always better to meet face to face ! lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"

Surely this would be a more efficient use of time, cut down the odds of missing a good match because their message is sandwiched between shite and enable the female population to enjoy the site more?

Is there a specific reason most don't do this? Genuinely interested?

A

I find it way too depressing trawling through male profiles, which are on the whole dreadful, and make me see things I really didn't want to see!! I get fed up with it VERY quickly every time I've tried it, and have never found any hidden gems anyway, I get much better prospects finding me.

I also meet younger men and will never presume someone wants to meet older (dating sites don't state preferences), so it just cuts down the time wasted if they messaged me first.

I don't moan about messages - I have good filters up, and I find if I delete messages unread if people are not compatible I don't get any abuse either. "

Perfectly well explained - thanks!

If it works for you why would you change it?

It's those that display frustration and angst due to the number/quality of messages and the difficulty of finding suitable meets that confuse me.

If what you're currently doing isn't working then making no changes to your approach is hardly likely to improve results........

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago

Sunderland

Only one time, from a single guy who addressed his message as though it was a single profile. Lived about 2 mile from me, which I explicitly state I’ll never meet with someone locally and he was a wanna fuck now kinda post. All things guaranteed to boil my piss so I politely ignored his message.

To which he sent a prompt “yo think you’re to good for me” message

I must have been due, he got my full attention and then a block

Lex

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eal Deal PartiesWoman
over a year ago

x

The problem with most guys on here is that they don’t read what is being asked.. yesterday I asked for a social with a white guy aged 36/46 no beard!! No married guys.. I have my reasons, And must be within a 30 min drive of me!! I got lots messages.. no one fitting what I had asked!! So I replied no thanks and then get called all the names under the sun!! I’m not desperate and like what I like!! Is that so hard to get!! So the ones who was abusive get reported and blocked simple!! We are all here for different things!! And I’m not going to fuck someone I’m not interested in !! Simple!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m starting to think you and Mr White could be one and the same

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The problem with most guys on here is that they don’t read what is being asked.. yesterday I asked for a social with a white guy aged 36/46 no beard!! No married guys.. I have my reasons, And must be within a 30 min drive of me!! I got lots messages.. no one fitting what I had asked!! So I replied no thanks and then get called all the names under the sun!! I’m not desperate and like what I like!! Is that so hard to get!! So the ones who was abusive get reported and blocked simple!! We are all here for different things!! And I’m not going to fuck someone I’m not interested in !! Simple!! "

Glass houses/stones spring to mind

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Imagine the forums is where people most of the abuse!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eal Deal PartiesWoman
over a year ago

x


"The problem with most guys on here is that they don’t read what is being asked.. yesterday I asked for a social with a white guy aged 36/46 no beard!! No married guys.. I have my reasons, And must be within a 30 min drive of me!! I got lots messages.. no one fitting what I had asked!! So I replied no thanks and then get called all the names under the sun!! I’m not desperate and like what I like!! Is that so hard to get!! So the ones who was abusive get reported and blocked simple!! We are all here for different things!! And I’m not going to fuck someone I’m not interested in !! Simple!!

Glass houses/stones spring to mind "

It’s called personal choice!! Nothing more!! If someone don’t want u.. get over it!! Simple!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I get plenty of abuse. God knows why. My expectations are pretty clear, I don't try particularly hard to solicit attention (heck peak abuse was when I was in hospital earlier this year, before I'd learned not to bother, and the threats I got for "can I get back to you, I've landed in hospital"! Or later, unsolicited sarcastic or abusive messages when I was "not meeting due to injury"). I treat everyone about the same, and my standards actually aren't impossibly high.

I've tried blocking all guys, didn't find it effective. Still not my fault that I use the site in a way that's efficient and get abuse.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"The problem with most guys on here is that they don’t read what is being asked.. yesterday I asked for a social with a white guy aged 36/46 no beard!! No married guys.. I have my reasons, And must be within a 30 min drive of me!! I got lots messages.. no one fitting what I had asked!! So I replied no thanks and then get called all the names under the sun!! I’m not desperate and like what I like!! Is that so hard to get!! So the ones who was abusive get reported and blocked simple!! We are all here for different things!! And I’m not going to fuck someone I’m not interested in !! Simple!!

Glass houses/stones spring to mind "

Do you know what that expression means? How does it apply here?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with? "

Yes

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

ive only had one abusive message and that was the other day and nithing to do with me saying no thankyou

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with?

Yes"

Brill thanks xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think I've ever received abuse but then I don't bother reading messages if a profile doesn't grab my attention. Works for me. Only read and respond to interesting messages/ profiles = Happy times on fab. So many make this way harder than it need be. Muppets!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ndecidedMan
over a year ago

London

Everyone has their own preference, and there's thousands of people on here.

There's never an excuse to get arsey just because you someone on here isn't into you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice. "

I recognise your picture was I rude to you when conversing through messaging?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice.

I recognise your picture was I rude to you when conversing through messaging?"

I did not take it personally, I don’t honk you were rude, straight to the point and politely I thought.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice. "

Why?

Are you not an equal party in any meet or conversation?

If you perceive yourself as less important then that's generally how you'll get treated.

A

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

Is there a need to add the “I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness” though?

I just don’t think that’s a very nice thing to say to be fair. I know a lot of your stuff is tongue in cheek and you do make me laugh but I think some of the things you say don’t actually need to be said.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!

Is there a need to add the “I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness” though?

I just don’t think that’s a very nice thing to say to be fair. I know a lot of your stuff is tongue in cheek and you do make me laugh but I think some of the things you say don’t actually need to be said. "

... most of what is said on here doesn't need to be said. Forums would be a dull place if the only comments were what needed to be said

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rtraymondo76Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"Only once I've had abuse for saying that, and he came back later and apologised "

Outside your filters so sending you a thank you through this forum thread. For what you ask? For fabbing a photo of mine. Can't think why you would but bow to your preference. I could happily fab all of your pics, but not sure it would do me any good. For this thread, I've never had any abuse, and certainly never given any. It's a free choice, someone doesn't fancy what they see. Fine, move on. ALWAYS thank anyone for their polite "not for me" type message. Politeness costs nothing but is so appreciated.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice.

Why?

Are you not an equal party in any meet or conversation?

If you perceive yourself as less important then that's generally how you'll get treated.

A"

Did not mean to say guys are a lesser sex, I meant that there are so many more males on here. Not many ladies search profiles, but most guys do the chasing that’s all. So ladies have pick of the bunch

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Only once I've had abuse for saying that, and he came back later and apologised

Outside your filters so sending you a thank you through this forum thread. For what you ask? For fabbing a photo of mine. Can't think why you would but bow to your preference. I could happily fab all of your pics, but not sure it would do me any good. For this thread, I've never had any abuse, and certainly never given any. It's a free choice, someone doesn't fancy what they see. Fine, move on. ALWAYS thank anyone for their polite "not for me" type message. Politeness costs nothing but is so appreciated. "

You posted on the fabbing thread. And you're welcome!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Any guy that sends a rude message is a complete douche. Ladies deserve respect and the whole dating/ meeting up game is always on the female terms. Ladies have the pick of choice.

Why?

Are you not an equal party in any meet or conversation?

If you perceive yourself as less important then that's generally how you'll get treated.

A"

I think it's self selection a lot of the time. Even before Fab, on much more equal playing fields, I was much more cautious than most guys I knew.

This stuff takes (at least) two yeses. Anyone who devalues their yes cedes their power. Amount of choice in partners is irrelevant.

(I don't view this as a power game, fwiw. The only thing the unicorn effect has done for me is give me backup for holding my boundaries, and maybe taking guys a bit more seriously who are "out of my league")

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rtraymondo76Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham


"Only once I've had abuse for saying that, and he came back later and apologised

Outside your filters so sending you a thank you through this forum thread. For what you ask? For fabbing a photo of mine. Can't think why you would but bow to your preference. I could happily fab all of your pics, but not sure it would do me any good. For this thread, I've never had any abuse, and certainly never given any. It's a free choice, someone doesn't fancy what they see. Fine, move on. ALWAYS thank anyone for their polite "not for me" type message. Politeness costs nothing but is so appreciated.

You posted on the fabbing thread. And you're welcome! "

Man of my word, I've had the pleasure of looking at all your photos again (extra large size haha) and have fabbed them all. Your comments on threads usually make me chuckle. Keep it up. x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think us guys are happy to get a reply even if it’s to say that ur not interested. I for one wouldn’t get nasty with a woman because she isn’t interested in me. Just move on and try again lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin and London

If you get abuse for simply saying sorry you're not my type, then it should be an instant block.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *adtaffladMan
over a year ago

Rhyl

When I get that message which is quite often I reply thanking them for taking the time to reply and wishing them fun on fabs . Why be rude no one deserves that you would not be like that if it was face to face

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never had hate messages from women that I have rejected, firstly because I have never rejected anyone and I'd fuck anybody and secondly, well there is nothing else to add.

The comment that serves no purpose

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

seagulls have sticky feet...they can stick to anything , its how they sleep

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

And yeah, rejection stings. You take a deep breath and swallow it, or take it out somewhere harmless if necessary (beating up your pillow, stress ball, etc).

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary


"And yeah, rejection stings. You take a deep breath and swallow it, or take it out somewhere harmless if necessary (beating up your pillow, stress ball, etc). "

True...rejection is bad...its part of life...unfortunately some people choose not to breathe and rant instead...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!"

Any nonsense abuse I've had was mainly in first messages which I'd just ignore. I've never said no thanks to a decent message then had abuse. Think guys don't get much credit on here, I'd say there are more good guys than wanks. Most guys, and girls, know that we're just not all attracted to the same people/things.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *an_LexaCouple
over a year ago

Sunderland


"Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with? "

So if there’s anyone you don’t want to get through, you’ll need to block them.

If you open your filters for any reason and anyone messages, don’t even send a polite reply coz that will let them through your filters when you close them up again.

It’s like some space 1999 air block thing you have to work out to survive.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton

I haven't received any abusive messages, neither would I ever send one

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with?

So if there’s anyone you don’t want to get through, you’ll need to block them.

If you open your filters for any reason and anyone messages, don’t even send a polite reply coz that will let them through your filters when you close them up again.

It’s like some space 1999 air block thing you have to work out to survive. "

Same with winks, if you wink someone your filters no longer apply to them.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And yeah, rejection stings. You take a deep breath and swallow it, or take it out somewhere harmless if necessary (beating up your pillow, stress ball, etc). "

I punch myself in the balls, rejection hurts

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Question - to save starting a new thread. If you block everyone from messaging can your friends still message you and people you have already had conversations with?

So if there’s anyone you don’t want to get through, you’ll need to block them.

If you open your filters for any reason and anyone messages, don’t even send a polite reply coz that will let them through your filters when you close them up again.

It’s like some space 1999 air block thing you have to work out to survive. "

interesting

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!

Is there a need to add the “I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness” though?

I just don’t think that’s a very nice thing to say to be fair. I know a lot of your stuff is tongue in cheek and you do make me laugh but I think some of the things you say don’t actually need to be said. "

Some women like men with big cocks. Should they keep quiet in case men with little cocks think it's not nice?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"And yeah, rejection stings. You take a deep breath and swallow it, or take it out somewhere harmless if necessary (beating up your pillow, stress ball, etc).

True...rejection is bad...its part of life...unfortunately some people choose not to breathe and rant instead..."

With January self flagellation about to kick into gear, medicine ball slams are great for repressed anger and frustration

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oo32Man
over a year ago

tipperary


"And yeah, rejection stings. You take a deep breath and swallow it, or take it out somewhere harmless if necessary (beating up your pillow, stress ball, etc).

True...rejection is bad...its part of life...unfortunately some people choose not to breathe and rant instead...

With January self flagellation about to kick into gear, medicine ball slams are great for repressed anger and frustration "

Nawhhh its part of life...just smile and move on...no point in getting upset...medicine balls are too heavy

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How many people get abuse for giving this response?

I never get abusive messages, 8 years I’ve been here and I just don’t get them. (Probably will now after this post)

Is it because from the start most guys know they’re chancing their arm so they’re already expecting me to say no? Possibly, but even when I flat out say nah I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness, they just agree with me and thank me for replying. Mad!

Is there a need to add the “I like guys with extreme facial attractiveness” though?

I just don’t think that’s a very nice thing to say to be fair. I know a lot of your stuff is tongue in cheek and you do make me laugh but I think some of the things you say don’t actually need to be said.

Some women like men with big cocks. Should they keep quiet in case men with little cocks think it's not nice?

"

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 
 

By *mber DextrousWoman
over a year ago

Devon


"I love the “ just confirming I love myself” threads

I don't understand the hate for people that love themselves. Who the heck doesn't love themselves?

I love me.

If you can’t love yourself who else ever will?

Nothing wrong with a bit of self loving anyhow "

Nothing wrong with loving yourself, more people should, but if the expression of it knocks others either explicitly or implicitly that's not good.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
back to top