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"He isn’t really a star :-/" Inexperienced | |||
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"He isn’t really a star :-/" Hmm she gets so nervous she starts hiding in her own house.. | |||
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"He isn’t really a star :-/ Hmm she gets so nervous she starts hiding in her own house.. Get so nervous I hide behind my front door and peek through the peepyhole " Quiet as a mouse during sex | |||
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"He isn’t really a star :-/ Hmm she gets so nervous she starts hiding in her own house.. Get so nervous I hide behind my front door and peek through the peepyhole Quiet as a mouse during sex " Keeps his cycling shorts on :/ | |||
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"He lives too far away " She doesn't read her messages! | |||
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"He isn’t really a star :-/ Hmm she gets so nervous she starts hiding in her own house.. Get so nervous I hide behind my front door and peek through the peepyhole Quiet as a mouse during sex " Does that weird thing with hamsters | |||
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"He isn’t really a star :-/ Hmm she gets so nervous she starts hiding in her own house.. Get so nervous I hide behind my front door and peek through the peepyhole Quiet as a mouse during sex Keeps his cycling shorts on :/" Hasn't shagged me..... yet | |||
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"The mustard he puts on his knob." Her hairy vag cushions the thrusts | |||
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"Never free when he's in the country.. " Oh missy! You're going on my naughty list for this | |||
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"Never free when he's in the country.. Oh missy! You're going on my naughty list for this " I'm always on the naughty list z | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. " He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy!" Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky" Her narcolepsy | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy" Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/" Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X | |||
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"I think he’ll be a good shag " I think she will be a very good shag..... what a figure .... wow X | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/" She only wants to shag if she can put Barbra Streisand on while you you're in action | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X" He asked me to call him daddy | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X He asked me to call him daddy " Has a curious proclivity for reciting Shakespeare during the act which is a tad unnerving | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X He asked me to call him daddy Has a curious proclivity for reciting Shakespeare during the act which is a tad unnerving " Likes to try and breastfeed women before the act, hasn’t successfully pulled this off yet... | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X He asked me to call him daddy Has a curious proclivity for reciting Shakespeare during the act which is a tad unnerving Likes to try and breastfeed women before the act, hasn’t successfully pulled this off yet... " I’m so close to success though - I can feel it in me bones - manly lactation is nearly within my grasp.... | |||
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"He just doesn't remove his hand from his part. He sneezes on the partners ass during doggy! Will only cum if I do an impression of Jimmy cranky Her narcolepsy Only gets it up if I make him bark like a dog :/ Is like shagging a piece of wood ...... Only joking lol X He asked me to call him daddy Has a curious proclivity for reciting Shakespeare during the act which is a tad unnerving Likes to try and breastfeed women before the act, hasn’t successfully pulled this off yet... " Refuses point blank to suckle at my breast | |||
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"We had very different visions of him being milked." No one can get to the bottom of her riddle | |||
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"We had very different visions of him being milked. No one can get to the bottom of her riddle" He's doesn't have the right parts for me. | |||
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"Was laughing faces forgot can't use emojis " Pieces dangling in the wrong spots. | |||
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"Just the wrong pieces haha" Kept asking for a piece mid-shag. I said I'd make them after jeez! | |||
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"[Removed by poster at 28/12/18 18:05:14]" She deleted her comments and is scared to say what she wants | |||
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"They're too indecisive, spent 30 minutes discussing positions!" I can get my legs around his thighs | |||
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"They're too indecisive, spent 30 minutes discussing positions! I can get my legs around his thighs" Her lights gave me a shock ! | |||
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"don,t know if they are a crap shag. (but we would love to fine out)!. xxx " Forget about thread, you just got added to my hot list | |||
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"When asked to talk dirty he said ‘mucky tea towels’, ‘filthy sheets’, dirty floors.... " She got lipstick all over the bed sheets | |||
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"When asked to talk dirty he said ‘mucky tea towels’, ‘filthy sheets’, dirty floors.... " I was hoping for a blowjob but her lips were stuck together with lippy. At least she was quiet | |||
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"When asked to talk dirty he said ‘mucky tea towels’, ‘filthy sheets’, dirty floors.... " She always has to go on top | |||
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"She changed her mind last minute." Depends if she's red or blue | |||
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"She changed her mind last minute. Depends if she's red or blue " Ha ha neither. | |||
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"She changed her mind last minute." Kept asking me 'have we started yet?' | |||
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"When asked to talk dirty he said ‘mucky tea towels’, ‘filthy sheets’, dirty floors.... I was hoping for a blowjob but her lips were stuck together with lippy. At least she was quiet " Ooooh you monkey..... | |||
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"She changed her mind last minute. Kept asking me 'have we started yet?' " His body’s too good! Everyone knows gym bunnies are too busy looking in the mirror at their abs to be a decent shag! | |||
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"She's really a man with a peach fetish." She won't take her nanny slippers off. | |||
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"She's really a man with a peach fetish. She won't take her nanny slippers off." Absolutely nothing I think. | |||
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"She's really a man with a peach fetish. She won't take her nanny slippers off." So hot she burnt my bollocks | |||
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"Expected me to stick a red rose up my bum " What? like this? Wouldn’t stick a red rose up his arse | |||
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"She's a virgin" instead of jizm he shoots spicy yellow stuff | |||
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"He kept asking me to pull his finger when he was about cum " Can only cum when singing mary had a little lamb | |||
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"She changed her mind last minute. Kept asking me 'have we started yet?' His body’s too good! Everyone knows gym bunnies are too busy looking in the mirror at their abs to be a decent shag! " Ceiling mirror will be fine | |||
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"Refuses to remove her jacket never mind anything else unless you pole dance for her " Insisted on stlicking Foxes Glacier Mints up my arse claiming they make you last longer- we all know that it was Trebor mints that did that though | |||
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"Couldn’t get it up and ran out of blue pills " Nicked my blue pills and still couldn’t get it up | |||
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"Couldn't get his intsy windy blue shorts off." Farts when she cums | |||
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"Couldn't get his intsy windy blue shorts off. Farts when she cums " Causes women to fart when they cum | |||
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"Gets the wrong hole and jizzed in seconds." A cups... | |||
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"Spreads salmon paste on his nipples first " he had a cock i am not bi | |||
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"Can't give a blowjob to save her life!" Got his dick stuck in jar of sweets | |||
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"Can't give a blowjob to save her life! Got his dick stuck in jar of sweets " Still looking for his cock in the magnifying glass | |||
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"Can't give a blowjob to save her life! Got his dick stuck in jar of sweets Still looking for his cock in the magnifying glass" Spends more time concentrating of Tensing his abs to see if he has any | |||
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"His love of bollocks " I’ll need a refresher to confirm or deny the statement | |||
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"His love of bollocks I’ll need a refresher to confirm or deny the statement " His need to wear a shirt when having shower sex.. | |||
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"Doesn't make me a crap ahah.. Just an unattainable one cmonn i won't get offended I promise " She was sending winks on fab during it | |||
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"He refused to show his bum." She didn't take any pics of my bum | |||
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"He refused to show his bum. She didn't take any pics of my bum " Course I did. | |||
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"Too stunning to look at, forgot to actually have a jiggy!" Flirts with other women on fab during sex.. | |||
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"Too stunning to look at, forgot to actually have a jiggy! Flirts with other women on fab during sex.." Teases but no touching! | |||
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"Too stunning to look at, forgot to actually have a jiggy! Flirts with other women on fab during sex.. Teases but no touching!" Sexually frustrating but no release.. | |||
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"Too stunning to look at, forgot to actually have a jiggy! Flirts with other women on fab during sex.. Teases but no touching! Sexually frustrating but no release.." | |||
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"Only gets it up in the very early morning so shit for a lunchtime quicky " He tried putting it in my ass | |||
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"He has the wrong sort of toys." Very true. Too many cars | |||
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"He leaves the boxers on during sex" Nothing...he has chocolate balls lol x | |||
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"He leaves the boxers on during sex Nothing...he has chocolate balls lol x" To pretty, would make me cum to quickly. X | |||
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"Her vagina is only 1 inch deep and guarded by warlocks." he aint me | |||
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"Her vagina is only 1 inch deep and guarded by warlocks.he aint me " He brought his mum. | |||
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