FabSwingers.com forum: Bisexuality

By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I don't have a direct question here, I'm more asking for people's opinions; do you believe it's correct that people feel like that? Have you ever received abuse for your sexuality? Do you hide your sexuality? Do you maybe feel that bisexuality is fake and that they're just fooling themselves?

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Anyone?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I don’t shove my sexuality down people’s throats. I was straight until I was about age 42 so that was a bit of a life shock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you mean Bisexual or Fab-bisexual?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I kissed a man once.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

I'm not, I'm opening a discussion about people's experiences.

Y'know; public forum... It can't be all 'kiss, fuck, avoid'

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Anyone?

_rightonsteve is the gayest bloke ever

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Do you mean Bisexual or Fab-bisexual?

Fab straight guys? That's part of it too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone?

"
I've never been abused, so answer is no

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I kissed a man once. "

Just once Steve? Did you like it?

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

OP appears to be asking if intolerance is bad.

It is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

I'm not, I'm opening a discussion about people's experiences.

Y'know; public forum... It can't be all 'kiss, fuck, avoid'

Cool,can you give some examples of abuse?

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"OP appears to be asking if intolerance is bad.

It is."

That's not really what I'm asking. I'm asking for people's experiences or what they think about bisexuality, a wider discussion in general

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"OP appears to be asking if intolerance is bad.

It is."

Yes, I can't tolerate your silly willy pic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences "

In my experience I don't suffer with abuse and bisexuality is definitely not fake. As for hiding sexuality that question is best answered by all the 'straight' listed guys on this site who contact me. We are what we are and don't need labels in my view.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

Cause it’s relevant to the thread and his experiences of being bisexual, as viewed from people with other sexualites

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

Cause it’s relevant to the thread and his experiences of being bisexual, as viewed from people with other sexualites "

Ok thanks for letting me know.

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By *uryWhipMan
over a year ago

Harringay

I dont hide my sexuality but its not really anyone's business. I work with some people who can be homophobic in a náive way and hate the thought of them knowing what I get up to outside of work because they will treat differently. I've seen how they speak about one of the managers who is gay behind his back.

I hate mostly that everything is defined by label's. I dont have a god or a religion so i must be called an Athiest. Nihilist is another label that gets pushed around just appease the smaller minds of people. I more of a fuckitallist if i have to be anything. Cant put that on an equal opportunities form though. I like to think i just sample from the tree of life and tend to over engorge on what fruit life throws at me. Sex amd sexuality only make up samll percetage of who i am.

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By *ob_2017Man
over a year ago

the last place you look

Despite my profile saying bi-curious (that's for everyone who doesn't believe that I could possibly be bisexual without meeting a guy from here) I am, in fact, bisexual. My attraction tends to favour women but I find quite a few guys attractive and would have no qualms in kissing, going down on, or having sex with a guy that I liked.

I've never had abuse for that but then I don't parade it around. I'm not hiding, nor in the closet, but I don't feel the need to tell everyone I meet. I see it as similar to liking sprouts. Some do, some don't, but you wouldn't thrust it into a conversation that didn't warrant it. If there is a discussion about sexuality then it will come up and has done previously. I've never had a disgusted look or snide comment so I guess I'm lucky.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I disagree, some people like to use labels to define others and to pop them into neat little boxes. In my opinion and experience people are far more complex than that. However in a text based situation such as fab; yes, labels and terms that we use for ourselves carry weight and import

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Why are you telling us your bi sexual?Just get on with it

Cause it’s relevant to the thread and his experiences of being bisexual, as viewed from people with other sexualites "

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Despite my profile saying bi-curious (that's for everyone who doesn't believe that I could possibly be bisexual without meeting a guy from here) I am, in fact, bisexual. My attraction tends to favour women but I find quite a few guys attractive and would have no qualms in kissing, going down on, or having sex with a guy that I liked.

I don't parade it around, I generally believe that it's no ones business really, however I've received abuse on grindr from gay men and in life from lesbians for being 'fake' or words to that effect.

Also the medical system discriminates against bisexual men, not to mention all of the couples on here who consider bi guys as dirty...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I was raised in a horribly homophobic environment. Abuse? Don't get me started. It actually hit me like a bolt of lightning as a young adult that people could be same sex attracted without hurting anyone (much less the downfall of society as I'd been taught). My earliest same sex experiences were tainted with fear, hatred, and even erasure, as attraction between women was impossible. Women only consent to sex a) to please their husbands, honour God, and have the children they universally desire, or b) to corrupt men. Any individual female sexuality is sinful and must be crushed.

I got better! But accepting my sexuality (hell, even being sexual) has been a long and hard fought battle.

In practice I'm in a fairly flimsy closet in real life. Those from and with connections to my childhood, they assume I'm straight and I'm not inclined to correct them. Those without those connections also assume I'm straight, but I don't lie if it comes up.

Outside those particularly toxic influences, I do feel it a bit from both sides, including on Fab a bit. In real life I'm neither straight nor queer enough depending on who you ask. On Fab, while I'm sought after, my same sex attraction is often treated as an ornament, an addition to the "real thing", rather than of equal worth to my attraction to men. I've even been told it's a kink not a sexuality!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dad kicked the fuck out of me when he found out.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

We're moving towards a period of greater acceptance of varied sexual orientations imo - whether it will continuously develop, without any backlash or reduction again, I'd certainly expect there to be movements in both directions. Younger people here are different to their older relatives, where they define themselves more openly and with greater levels of bisexuality.

Some more ultra-religious and hard right elements of society will continue to push for constraint and there may come a point where it's generally to no avail, as it achieves little. Though I'd not expect them to give up without massive effort, possibly towards some extinction event, of their beliefs (less so the religious types).

The AIDS crisis was a major brake on bisexuality being acceptable for many, which was tragic in all ways.

What some people find hard to understand is the complexity of sexuality, where they assume there must be parity between liking all genders in the same ways - this is the next barrier of ignorance that could diminish. People dabble, experiment, have very contrasting differences between them, in how they appreciate and may gain satisfaction from different genders, rather than a universal truth for all. I spend most of my time amongst people who are late teens onwards and the outlook is very different from others who are older - I love it.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I was raised in a horribly homophobic environment. Abuse? Don't get me started. It actually hit me like a bolt of lightning as a young adult that people could be same sex attracted without hurting anyone (much less the downfall of society as I'd been taught). My earliest same sex experiences were tainted with fear, hatred, and even erasure, as attraction between women was impossible. Women only consent to sex a) to please their husbands, honour God, and have the children they universally desire, or b) to corrupt men. Any individual female sexuality is sinful and must be crushed.

I got better! But accepting my sexuality (hell, even being sexual) has been a long and hard fought battle.

I'm sorry to read about your experiences from when you were younger and I can totally sympathise with how that made and makes you feel.

I think it's an interesting point that you brought up about attitudes towards female bisexuality as well in your last paragraph, I do think that often it's seen as a 'trick' to keep the guys happy in a play situation and it's definitely fetishised by people, often by the same people who reject male bisexuality

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"My dad kicked the fuck out of me when he found out.

I'm sorry to read that, has he accepted you since?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I believe that though there has been an increase in acceptance and understanding of bi and homosexuality in others, there has also been an upsurge in those that display an unwillingness to acknowledge that it is even allowable or normal. Like the middle ground has decreased and left mostly polarised opinions.

I may be wrong but that is how it appears to me.

Mind you, as unpleasant as it can be to hear pejorative diatribe from those that disapprove, I would rather that they do so and let themselves be known. Maybe even possibly be dissuaded from their stand point with reasoned debate instead of just being told they are wrong because they are.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I got better! But accepting my sexuality (hell, even being sexual) has been a long and hard fought battle.

I'm sorry to read about your experiences from when you were younger and I can totally sympathise with how that made and makes you feel.

Yes, I do think that the rejection of male bisexuality and the fetishisation of female bisexuality are two sides of the same coin.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I wonder if sraight, bi or gay are just one sliding scale...

Everyone has the capacity to be be maybe...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I wonder if sraight, bi or gay are just one sliding scale...

Everyone has the capacity to be be maybe..."

The Kinsey scale.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I believe that though there has been an increase in acceptance and understanding of bi and homosexuality in others, there has also been an upsurge in those that display an unwillingness to acknowledge that it is even allowable or normal. Like the middle ground has decreased and left mostly polarised opinions.

I may be wrong but that is how it appears to me.

In all honesty I was hoping to hear from some people who had a negative view, if only for the benefit of the discussion.

I do believe that attitudes are changing in an steadily positive manner, but in reply to your point; I think that this will cause the vehemently opposed to become more exposed

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By *ix-foot-two-stuMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I've seen a ray of home in the comments from my kids about how their peers were treated at school where being gay didn't seem to carry any stigma at all. That's their school and their friends. Not saying it's the same everywhere, but a ray of hope for tolerance, anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I wonder if sraight, bi or gay are just one sliding scale...

Everyone has the capacity to be be maybe...

The Kinsey scale. "

*nods*

Societal influences and a person's inhibitions prevent a lot from accepting or acting. It is where a lot of homophobic actions come from in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In all honesty I was hoping to hear from some people who had a negative view, if only for the benefit of the discussion.

I do believe that attitudes are changing in an steadily positive manner, but in reply to your point; I think that this will cause the vehemently opposed to become more exposed"

Whilst plenty of folk will argue the other side for the hell of it on here, I think this is a subject that can lead to what would amount to be fabicide if they aren't careful in how they put their point across, so you might be waiting a while for them

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay."

What do you base that opinion on?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lie on my profile, it says I'm straight but I'm not.

People (that have known me a long time) in real life know I'm not straight and I hate that. My sex life is my business. I wish I could 'go back in the closet'.

There's more sexualities than bi straight and gay.

I think bisexual people are still thought of as being wishy washy. "They should pick a side. Gay or straight". I really hate "they are just greedy". Bisexual people don't fancy every person on the planet. Just as straight people don't fancy every person of the opposite sex.

I also hate when celebrities come out. I wish they wouldnt- it's their private life. And it's always phrased they 'admit' to being gay/ bi. Admit? Like it's a negative?!!

How many people 'admit' to being straight.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My dad kicked the fuck out of me when he found out.

I'm sorry to read that, has he accepted you since? "

Nope. And I’ve had nothing to do with him since. I changed my name because I don’t want to share anything in common with him.

My brother uses his mother’s maiden name.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only people who know I am anything other than heterosexual are on here. That may change - I’ll just suck it and see. Never received any abuse for my bi/pansexual orientation on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on? "

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

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By *ovelifelovefuntimesMan
over a year ago

Where ever I lay my hat

I've become more open to new things as I've got older. I wouldn't say I "like" men but I do enjoy giving pleasure and particularly as part of bi mmf find anything goes as long as everyone is comfortable.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I lie on my profile, it says I'm straight but I'm not.

People (that have known me a long time) in real life know I'm not straight and I hate that. My sex life is my business. I wish I could 'go back in the closet'.

There's more sexualities than bi straight and gay.

I also hate when celebrities come out. I wish they wouldnt- it's their private life. And it's always phrased they 'admit' to being gay/ bi. Admit? Like it's a negative?!!

How many people 'admit' to being straight. "

I totally agree with you about 'coming out', I think it's a huge overly dramatic gesture that is completely unnecessary in day to day life. If my kids are gay or bisexual or anything else then I will accept that just in exactly the same manner and there will be no explanation necessary.

I'm not so sure about the concept of celebrities though. I dont think a big press conference is necessary, but I think that it's good to have people in the public eye of all sexualities as positive role models.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex."

I don't think it's as clear cut as that, some people may find a person of the same sex attractive but not want sexual contact, some may enjoy limited sexual contact but not want full sex, there are different levels of attraction

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My dad kicked the fuck out of me when he found out.

Oh fuck. That’s harsh. I’ve never outwardly told my dad. He’s slipped into conversation a few times that he’s ok with lesbians but not gay/bi men. I’ve told my sister. My sister is awesome. She’s bi too. Good to have her to talk to about stuff.

I come to terms with it when I was just getting into a relationship. The girl I was with cried when I told her. And told her mum and sister. I’m still with her - married now - even though she’s never really accepted it. She found Grindr on my phone this year. Nearly split us up. Wish I had done something for all the shit that was (still is) thrown at me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with.."

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with.."

Very true, I'm not sure of the relevance though...

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

No, plenty of guys attracted to men don't have sex either... Hence my point about it being fluid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

Does annoy me when people who say they’re straight would go down on a guy though. It shouldn’t but it does. What’s so wrong with accepting you’re bi? Even just a little bit?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own. "

I'm not telling other people how they feel at all.Just that if you are a man or woman and have/want sex with another person of the same sex then you are not straight.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

No, plenty of guys attracted to men don't have sex either... Hence my point about it being fluid"

Then you are bi

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

If a straight male has sex with another man as an experiment then does it make him bi or gay ?

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

I don't parade it around, I generally believe that it's no ones business really, however I've received abuse on grindr from gay men and in life from lesbians for being 'fake' or words to that effect.

Also the medical system discriminates against bisexual men, not to mention all of the couples on here who consider bi guys as dirty... "

I’m intrigued by your last statement op! How do you feel the medical system discriminates against bisexual men? Xx

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own.

I'm not telling other people how they feel at all.Just that if you are a man or woman and have/want sex with another person of the same sex then you are not straight."

This is the problem with thinking literals and defined terms, people don't fit in neat boxes

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

No, plenty of guys attracted to men don't have sex either... Hence my point about it being fluid

Then you are bi"

That is telling someone how they feel though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

If a straight male has sex with another man as an experiment then does it make him bi or gay ? "

I would say if it was an experiment then bi if he then carried on having sex with only men then gay.But if he liked a bit of both then bi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Gay sex

Bi sex

Straight sex

It's all just sex.

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

No, plenty of guys attracted to men don't have sex either... Hence my point about it being fluid

Then you are bi

That is telling someone how they feel though"

So you admit that if you like both then you are bi?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People who have sex don't always want a relationship with people they have sex with..

No you are absolutely correct.

But a straight male wouldn't have sex with another male

If a straight male has sex with another man as an experiment then does it make him bi or gay ?

I would say if it was an experiment then bi if he then carried on having sex with only men then gay.But if he liked a bit of both then bi

Yes. If the were simply curious then they’re straight, if they’ve done it at least once and want to do it again then they’re bi.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I don't parade it around, I generally believe that it's no ones business really, however I've received abuse on grindr from gay men and in life from lesbians for being 'fake' or words to that effect.

Also the medical system discriminates against bisexual men, not to mention all of the couples on here who consider bi guys as dirty...

I’m intrigued by your last statement op! How do you feel the medical system discriminates against bisexual men? Xx"

Giving blood for one...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own.

I'm not telling other people how they feel at all.Just that if you are a man or woman and have/want sex with another person of the same sex then you are not straight.

This is the problem with thinking literals and defined terms, people don't fit in neat boxes

I get what you are saying but I think that they do.Lets say a couple advertise a meet looking for a bi male only for a threesome.I wouldn't message as I'm straight but people that like both would.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I’m intrigued by your last statement op! How do you feel the medical system discriminates against bisexual men? Xx

Giving blood for one... "

Really? Is there no way to screen it these days ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels"

Its all good,I just think people need to be honest with what they are.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

"Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels

Its all good,I just think people need to be honest with what they are.

If you are straight but decide at some point in the future to be bi then what are you now ?

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own.

I'm not telling other people how they feel at all.Just that if you are a man or woman and have/want sex with another person of the same sex then you are not straight.

This is the problem with thinking literals and defined terms, people don't fit in neat boxes

I get what you are saying but I think that they do.Lets say a couple advertise a meet looking for a bi male only for a threesome.I wouldn't message as I'm straight but people that like both would."

That's a very literal example, and I think you're missing my point of the many levels of attraction that exist before wanting full sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels

Its all good,I just think people need to be honest with what they are.

If you are straight but decide at some point in the future to be bi then what are you now ?"

Blimey ha ha that's taking it a bit far is it something you just choose?

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I’m intrigued by your last statement op! How do you feel the medical system discriminates against bisexual men? Xx

Giving blood for one...

Really? Is there no way to screen it these days ?"

Yes, absolutely. Hence the descrimination

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sexuality is way more complicated than can be pigeonholed into a few labels.

I think preference for men vs women is not a case of straight, bi or gay rather than more of a sliding scale.

And that place on the scale can change. Where to depends on how a person feels, their opportunities and experiences.

Some people consider themselves 100% one way or the other, whereas I think most people are a little way along the scale.

Even if they don't want to admit it for fear of public ridicule.

Unfortunately it's a legitimate fear because of the way society is today.

I disagree I think you are either Bi straight or gay.

What do you base that opinion on?

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex.

That's cool but it's how I see it.

I don't think that a straight guy would find another man attractive.

It's fine that its not how you see it, but you're essentially telling others how they feel with that assumption. You can never speak for others experiences or feelings, only your own.

I'm not telling other people how they feel at all.Just that if you are a man or woman and have/want sex with another person of the same sex then you are not straight.

This is the problem with thinking literals and defined terms, people don't fit in neat boxes

I get what you are saying but I think that they do.Lets say a couple advertise a meet looking for a bi male only for a threesome.I wouldn't message as I'm straight but people that like both would.

That's a very literal example, and I think you're missing my point of the many levels of attraction that exist before wanting full sex. "

No I completely get what you are saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences "

That we are all plotted somewhere on the scale. I am certainly curious, some seriously smoking hot ladies around.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

That we are all plotted somewhere on the scale. I am certainly curious, some seriously smoking hot ladies around. "

agreed. I slide up and down the scale on different days depending on how I’m feeling. If it works that you like both then only you are justified to call yourself bi. Or whatever label you like. If you even do labels.

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

Snap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm straight and only ever been with women.but think about trying cock sometimes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So am I having bi sex while my boyfriend is having gay sex??

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

"Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels

Its all good,I just think people need to be honest with what they are.

If you are straight but decide at some point in the future to be bi then what are you now ?

Blimey ha ha that's taking it a bit far is it something you just choose?"

No, I was just wondering if you straight now could you be bisexual in the future ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So am I having bi sex while my boyfriend is having gay sex?? "

No words for this. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fair play rugby but I get so confused about all the labels

Its all good,I just think people need to be honest with what they are.

If you are straight but decide at some point in the future to be bi then what are you now ?

Blimey ha ha that's taking it a bit far is it something you just choose?

No, I was just wondering if you straight now could you be bisexual in the future ?

Yeah things change in life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So am I having bi sex while my boyfriend is having gay sex?? "

Depends who you are having it with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lie on my profile, it says I'm straight but I'm not.

People (that have known me a long time) in real life know I'm not straight and I hate that. My sex life is my business. I wish I could 'go back in the closet'.

There's more sexualities than bi straight and gay.

I also hate when celebrities come out. I wish they wouldnt- it's their private life. And it's always phrased they 'admit' to being gay/ bi. Admit? Like it's a negative?!!

How many people 'admit' to being straight.

I think 'coming out' makes it something more than it should be. I didn't come out as female or liking chocolate. It's all irrelevant to anyone but me.

I agree about the press conference thing. The paps make such a big thing out of it when a celebrity says they aren't straight.

I'm very much liking the celebs that hint but won't 'admit' anything.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one."

Why would you rather put straight?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one."

When I first saw your username I knew it from somewhere but couldn't figure out where. Then I eventually realised! I love that song!!

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"I lie on my profile, it says I'm straight but I'm not.

People (that have known me a long time) in real life know I'm not straight and I hate that. My sex life is my business. I wish I could 'go back in the closet'.

There's more sexualities than bi straight and gay.

I also hate when celebrities come out. I wish they wouldnt- it's their private life. And it's always phrased they 'admit' to being gay/ bi. Admit? Like it's a negative?!!

How many people 'admit' to being straight.

I think 'coming out' makes it something more than it should be. I didn't come out as female or liking chocolate. It's all irrelevant to anyone but me.

I agree about the press conference thing. The paps make such a big thing out of it when a celebrity says they aren't straight.

I'm very much liking the celebs that hint but won't 'admit' anything. "

I agree with you about the 'chocolate' thing. It's totally irrelevant as to whether you like men, women, trans people or whoever, to anyone else, why should it be necessary to point out that you want something other than what the Societal norm is

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

Coming out is a big deal for some artists. Elton John coming out affected his USA sales.. I am sure for others it might boost sales..

Financial decisions

But I agree. Nobody comes out as straight so why should gay people have to

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"I lie on my profile, it says I'm straight but I'm not.

People (that have known me a long time) in real life know I'm not straight and I hate that. My sex life is my business. I wish I could 'go back in the closet'.

There's more sexualities than bi straight and gay.

I also hate when celebrities come out. I wish they wouldnt- it's their private life. And it's always phrased they 'admit' to being gay/ bi. Admit? Like it's a negative?!!

How many people 'admit' to being straight. "

I completely agree.

It used to really grind my gears when an openly bi woman I used to work with used to get told that - it was banter between them, but I really had to bite my tongue.

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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago

Poole, but up in lincs for a bit

Never received abuse but I'm pan not bi. My sister is no also and our dad used to joke she needed to pick a team and stop switching haha.

My big thoughts for the day are that love, attraction, connection (all those great things) they don't know gender or lables. And we as humans feel the need to lable everything when sometimes we shouldn't, but sometimes lable help people deal with things. Catch 22.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try being in a same sex, mixed age relationship

A relationship where you are merely tolerated by one family, something that will never change

A relationship where the second family don't want to know or acknowledge the others existance

A relationship where even your oldest friends now keep you at a polite arms length

A relationship, at best, where you are treated as a curiosity

A relationship where you are assumed to be sugar daddy as opposed to a 'real' partner

A relationship where you have been told you are disgusting by strangers

A relationship where 'well meaning' hotel staff will allocate you a twin rather than a double

A relationship where you cannot be affectionate with the person you love without looking over your shoulder first

A relationship that for all intents and purposes is conducted in private

Trust me, being called out here for being bi-sexual is water off a ducks back

And whilst I'm on one, if I was in a straight relationship, people would be more accepting of my bi status

It is assumed by many that I am gay and curious as opposed to being bi and in a same sex relat

It's a strange old world

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?"

Because I'm not bi

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

When I first saw your username I knew it from somewhere but couldn't figure out where. Then I eventually realised! I love that song!!"

It's a fantastic song. It's resonated with me since I first heard it, even before the FAB world!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

That we are all plotted somewhere on the scale. I am certainly curious, some seriously smoking hot ladies around.

I think the scale, if there is one, has more stops on it than we may ever know. My experiences suggest that very few are at either end ( gay or straight), and those who are happy in their skin will admit at least to themselves that they are somewhere in the middle. Some times you need to gain a bit of maturity to accept who you are?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex."

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time."

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

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By *ea monkey OP Man
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't."

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

You may not agree that there is a sliding scale, but this is exactly what proves it. You seem intent on forcing everyone into your belief system and pigeon holes, irrespective of their actual experiences and feelings

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

My Dad once said something when I was arguing a point with Mum

"She's made her mind up. No point in trying to confuse her with the facts"

This applies here

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

My Dad once said something when I was arguing a point with Mum

"She's made her mind up. No point in trying to confuse her with the facts"

This applies here "

So because my definition of what bisexuality is is different, I'm in the wrong and confused?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

I'm still not telling people how they feel but the fact is that if you play with people of the same sex then you are not straight.

I'll leave it there as it is just going to go around in circles.Feel free to pm me and I'll get back to you later if you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

My Dad once said something when I was arguing a point with Mum

"She's made her mind up. No point in trying to confuse her with the facts"

This applies here

So because my definition of what bisexuality is is different, I'm in the wrong and confused?"

No, but for someone who isn't affected by bi-sexuality, you have made over 20% of the contributions in this thread to date

You are straight, you seek straight playmates, you wouldn't shag a guy

Why does how others choose to label themselves, not you, themselves, bother you so much that you will argue the point where you're dominating a thread that shouldn't affect you ?

It's almost as if you can't let it drop til we all see your point

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

"For myself this is something that I came to later in life. I certainly feel that my sexuality has been 'hard won' and its very important to me.

Sadly though many people receive abuse or discrimination because of it, even amongst LGBTQ+ groups bisexuality is open to abuse.

I'm interested to know people's thoughts and experiences

Labels are very important on here as with anywhere in life.

I often get asked where my username comes from.

It's from a Kelly Clarkson song called "You Can't Win". I describe it as a song about not fitting into pigeonholes.

I feel I don't conform to any fixed label; straight or bi. There are people who automatically assume I'm bi because I'm ok to play with women as part of a threesome.

I'd rather put straight on my profile because I wouldn't play with a woman one on one.

Why would you rather put straight?

Because I'm not bi

I would disagree if you are happy to play with people of the same sex.

But it's not your call to make that decision for me, is it?

I'm not attracted to women, so therefore I'm not bi.

I compare it to sleeping with someone you're not physically attracted to. It all works and you can have some fun, but not necessarily something you'd want to do all the time.

It is my call,if I was looking for a straight man or woman I would like to think people would be honest about it and not pretend to be something they aren't.

For saying that you posted earlier that you're not telling people how they feel, that's exactly what you're doing here.

My Dad once said something when I was arguing a point with Mum

"She's made her mind up. No point in trying to confuse her with the facts"

This applies here

So because my definition of what bisexuality is is different, I'm in the wrong and confused?

No, but for someone who isn't affected by bi-sexuality, you have made over 20% of the contributions in this thread to date

You are straight, you seek straight playmates, you wouldn't shag a guy

Why does how others choose to label themselves, not you, themselves, bother you so much that you will argue the point where you're dominating a thread that shouldn't affect you ?

It's almost as if you can't let it drop til we all see your point "

I've said that I should be labelled the way I want to be. Labels don't matter.

And I said I play with women, so it's my choice about how *I* get labelled.

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Haven’t read a single comment on the thread, sorry folks, so here’s my wandering stream of consciousness.

I’m bi, always have been. Preferred women before I even started fancying guys. A threesome with Indiana Jones and Lara Croft was pretty much my stand out fantasy of my early teens (I have a fluid concept of time and a thing for adventuring geeks

)

My mum never really believed me because apparently bisexuality doesn’t exist, it’s what you are when you haven’t made up your mind yet - she got that line from her gay best friend at the time, and ‘apparently he would know as he is gay’

I’ve never really received any abuse for it though. Gay girl in my class gave me a hard time for it through high school, Christian friends told me earnestly that it was the Devil and they would help me shake off his influence, a lad once spat at me and told me that gay people like me were lower than paedos and rapists...the usual shenanigans.

It’s never really bothered me though. People are weird and don’t seem to understand that for some of us, gender plays no part in how attracted to someone we are. Then again, I can’t really wrap my head around how straight or gay people view someone...to me people are either good looking or they’re not.

But my bisexuality doesn’t really define me, any more than my genderfluidity, my submissive side or my polyamory do. They are all what I am, not who I am, like being a Marmite lover and a geek.

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By *ix-foot-two-stuMan
over a year ago

Coventry

If you are straight you like members of the opposite sex.

If you are bi you like a bit of both.

If you are gay you like people of the same sex."

Seems to me that you are doggedly sticking to the labels that society has invented to make pigeonholing people easy.

There is definitely a convenience to having labels, but they are very generic and so don't fully describe how people actually feel.

Feelings are more complicated. And they change.

My suggestion is that since we are forced to use those labels in society (and by the Fab site system as an example), maybe we could appreciate that picking a label does not (as Elcee rightly says) define people. It's just a broad indication.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So am I having bi sex while my boyfriend is having gay sex??

Depends who you are having it with

Well each other Obviously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are both bisexual, a source of local gossip to the people here. Outed due to me not deleting all our profiles on our return to the UK 14 years ago. The atmosphere at our local pub got so bad that we no longer go in there. The only pub for 30 miles and the only one we can walk home from. So that social network closed down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We are both bisexual, a source of local gossip to the people here. Outed due to me not deleting all our profiles on our return to the UK 14 years ago. The atmosphere at our local pub got so bad that we no longer go in there. The only pub for 30 miles and the only one we can walk home from. So that social network closed down."

That saddens me

Yet people will argue than sexuality is more accepted today than it has ever been

Maybe it has

Maybe it has in the cities

More accepted, yes

Accepted, no

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