FabSwingers.com forum: Am I being stupid?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So, it transpired that a guy I worked with for a while and had a huge crush on was on here, and after a whirlwind 3am chat we met up later that same day at a hotel for sex, went for dinner, cuddled, spend the night together (I have never been able to sleep over with a meet before) The next morning we had more sex, ambled onto town to get our respective transport home.

We talk a lot on Facebook, Whatsapp, on here, he helped me a few nights ago when I was incredibly low and depressed, to the poibt of doing something stupid. I feel comfortable with him and I really like him- it helped that I already knew him from work. However, I find it hard to trust anyone, and I worry that I an going to blow things with him but I have all these niggling doubts about him and I think sometimes he doesn't always tell me the truth. He said he was going to see elderly relatives tonight (this was at 9, 9:30) and that he would be unable to message while he was there. He showered before he went. I have got it in my head now that he was actually on a date (he still has an active Fab prescence and is on dating sites)

I don't know what to do. I feel like he'll never be honest with me because he's worried I'm fragile and I won't like the truth, but the whole thing is so complex it is messing with my head. I'm in recovery for an eating disorder, I'm depressed and I have Aspergers and every aspect of this is hard, but he's been so good to me I don't want to give him up. If he sees this I don't know what he'll do or say but I don't have anyone I can talk to about this. I feel like I am going crazy.

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m certainly not making a horrid comment but you have an active Fab account?!

Did you expect him to delete his after your meet?

Personally I read that you’re very attached to this guy already.

Easier said than done but I would take a deep breath & step back for a few days xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you need to deal with you before involving a man in the relationship / FWB sense

Enjoy it for what it was as opposed to what you are telling yourself it could be (if you weren't going to mess it up)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m certainly not making a horrid comment but you have an active Fab account?!

Did you expect him to delete his after your meet?

Personally I read that you’re very attached to this guy already.

Easier said than done but I would take a deep breath & step back for a few days xx "

We're both keeping ours active, his because he has friends he keeps in touch with on here, I feel like mine is still here because I want to keep tabs on him ? It's so unhealthy and I hate what this is doing to me but I have always been jealous and I hate the thought of him potentially meeting other people and lying to me when we said we'd be exclusive to each other. I do use the forums and it's nice to talk to people but I'd give it up in a heartbeat if I was sure he had too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you need to deal with you before involving a man in the relationship / FWB sense

Enjoy it for what it was as opposed to what you are telling yourself it could be (if you weren't going to mess it up)"

Do you think I've messed it up now?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him? "

He said we'd be exclusive, and that he'd be there for me and we'd talk as much as he could. He has helped me a lot, and I feel like we have bonded over some stuff, but my stupid brain can't just be happy and accept this as a good thing and trust and believe what he says to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So, it transpired that a guy I worked with for a while and had a huge crush on was on here, and after a whirlwind 3am chat we met up later that same day at a hotel for sex, went for dinner, cuddled, spend the night together (I have never been able to sleep over with a meet before) The next morning we had more sex, ambled onto town to get our respective transport home.

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

You need someone to talk to but it's not him. If you seem needy I don't blame him for running a mile x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How quickly did you agree to be exclusive? That's a pretty big step for swingers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're being clingy already and that's not a good sign.

Would you have been ok if he said he was going out to have sex?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

I think you're right to be careful, but maybe enjoy it on a day-to-day basis and not let worries build up without talking to him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you need to deal with you before involving a man in the relationship / FWB sense

Enjoy it for what it was as opposed to what you are telling yourself it could be (if you weren't going to mess it up)

Do you think I've messed it up now? "

No. I think you are more important than any potential relationship

Enjoy the experience for what it was

Deal with yourself

I don't think the guy is your solution or even part of the solution

You sound low and a bit 'all of the place' emotionally

Not a good platform for anything new forming

Get yourself stronger and better able to cope before involving a man

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

You need someone to talk to but it's not him. If you seem needy I don't blame him for running a mile x"

I don't know if he has run a mile (but probably will when he sees this)

He's one of those really nice people that tries to help everyone. We've made plans to meet next Saturday and next Thursday to do various things, but I'm starting to question if he's better off without me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

If he said you will be exclusive he should have delete his account, and then you yours.

Problem with deleting yours is you won't be on here to see if he lied.

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

The only way you will mess it uo is by not trusting and keeping tabs....

I feel for you and your situation,but you do need to sort yourself out before you can be with anybody..as somebody has already said..

There is no relationship if there is no trust...

Talk to him and tell him how your feeling if you feel that close to him,and ask what he feels,and ask him to be really honest about it so you can deal with whatever he says...

I hope all goes well with you both..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

If he said you will be exclusive he should have delete his account, and then you yours.

Problem with deleting yours is you won't be on here to see if he lied. "

Therein lies the problem. I can't just let myself trust him. I ruin things before they have a chance to start because I'm too fucking damaged to have a functioning relationship of any kind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

If he said you will be exclusive he should have delete his account, and then you yours.

Problem with deleting yours is you won't be on here to see if he lied.

Therein lies the problem. I can't just let myself trust him. I ruin things before they have a chance to start because I'm too fucking damaged to have a functioning relationship of any kind"

Acknowledging you have a trust issue is a positive in this.

I would have a cards on the table heart to heart with him. Tell him your worries and how you feel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

You need someone to talk to but it's not him. If you seem needy I don't blame him for running a mile x

I don't know if he has run a mile (but probably will when he sees this)

For god sake women give yourself a shake lol go out and have fun. Don't bombard him with your problems and start thinking more of yourself. Your causing your own drama. There's no need. Go out...Get yourself looking nice and let your hair down. If it works out fine...if it doesn't then fuck it it wasn't meant to be...Just enjoy it in the meantime x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I just think if he was visiting elderly relatives it's an odd time to do it? And it's almost midnight and he's not picking up, so it just makes me doubt he is being honest. I don't want to be sceptical of him but I think I have made the whole situation so toxic it's untenable for him and he's gone elsewhere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The only way you will mess it uo is by not trusting and keeping tabs....

I feel for you and your situation,but you do need to sort yourself out before you can be with anybody..as somebody has already said..

There is no relationship if there is no trust...

Talk to him and tell him how your feeling if you feel that close to him,and ask what he feels,and ask him to be really honest about it so you can deal with whatever he says...

I hope all goes well with you both.."

The problem with trusting someone is them not being trustworthy.

If you have been betrayed it isn't easy to trust again.

I got over it by not giving a shit about the men I fuck. I like them; I love the sex, but I don't care what they get up to when I'm not around. If any of them asked for an exclusive relationship I would say no. That solves the being cheated on problem.

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By *hubbyfatcockMan
over a year ago

Sutton

Understand where you're coming from but I also see that this is something that may be managed via medication etc. It feels almost as if you're obsessed with the person in question (sounds much worse than its intended! Not trying be to harsh or critical, just know that with Aspergers obsessions are very easy to fall into!)

If you've missed your fluoxetine or equivalent recently that may have contributed to the feeling.

That being said, I may have it entirely wrong.

Either way, I wish you nothing but the best in this difficult situation!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My experience, I don’t really think guys want someone they’ve met on here as their real world partner, they can sometimes think of women on here as good enough to fuck only. You’ve already met and slept together and you have his number. It’s not too late to salvage how he sees you. Next time you meet you could tell him that you’re not going to find what you want on here so you’re gonna give up the site and leave. If you want exclusivity show him what that means and hope he follows suit.

If you stay on here you’re gonna drive yourself crazy checking his profile and seeing when he was last online, thinking he’s messaging other birds or meeting them. Be safe in the knowledge that single men generally don’t do well on here so chances of him finding anyone to meet or even respond to one of his messages are slim.

Men can smell desperate/clingy vibes and it causes a chemical reaction in their brain to retreat from the thing that’s chasing them (not calling you a thing btw)

Trust and believe me I’ve been in your shoes when you like a guy from here and you get all panicky about what they’re up to. It is easier said than done to just switch off and try and be breezy, it’s hard, I know it’s hard but you’ve got to be cool otherwise he’ll fuck you off. Pull back a bit. To sum up, meet him ASAP and have the chat that you’re gonna leave here and then do it, checking up on him will just make you worse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just think if he was visiting elderly relatives it's an odd time to do it? And it's almost midnight and he's not picking up, so it just makes me doubt he is being honest. I don't want to be sceptical of him but I think I have made the whole situation so toxic it's untenable for him and he's gone elsewhere."

You could tell him you aren't ready for an exclusive relationship and he doesn't have to tell you where he is or what he's doing.

Stop caring too much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My experience, I don’t really think guys want someone they’ve met on here as their real world partner, they can sometimes think of women on here as good enough to fuck only. You’ve already met and slept together and you have his number. It’s not too late to salvage how he sees you. Next time you meet you could tell him that you’re not going to find what you want on here so you’re gonna give up the site and leave. If you want exclusivity show him what that means and hope he follows suit.

Men can smell desperate/clingy vibes and it causes a chemical reaction in their brain to retreat from the thing that’s chasing them (not calling you a thing btw)

I was hoping you would see this thread.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The only way you will mess it uo is by not trusting and keeping tabs....

I feel for you and your situation,but you do need to sort yourself out before you can be with anybody..as somebody has already said..

There is no relationship if there is no trust...

Talk to him and tell him how your feeling if you feel that close to him,and ask what he feels,and ask him to be really honest about it so you can deal with whatever he says...

I hope all goes well with you both..

The problem with trusting someone is them not being trustworthy.

If you have been betrayed it isn't easy to trust again.

The problem is that he is different. He seems to genuinely cate about me which is why I am so confused. If he was 'just another guy off Fab' then I would let it go, chalk it up to experience. It's driving me nuts that I have these doubts, and I'm sure it's making me sound like a crazy person.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I think it would help you to define the relationship in a way that will lessen the burden upon it, however possible. You're not in a monogamous longer term sexual relationship at this point, so he's probably better to establish for himself what is going on and what he may want - whilst you do the same.

Your working life is obviously highly important, so consider also that you may be better as friends only. You're vulnerable and it's going to make you stronger if you could get support more widely. The risk is that after finding yourselves on a casual sex based site that you expect he's wanting something different.

Take care

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Understand where you're coming from but I also see that this is something that may be managed via medication etc. It feels almost as if you're obsessed with the person in question (sounds much worse than its intended! Not trying be to harsh or critical, just know that with Aspergers obsessions are very easy to fall into!)

If you've missed your fluoxetine or equivalent recently that may have contributed to the feeling.

That being said, I may have it entirely wrong.

Either way, I wish you nothing but the best in this difficult situation! "

I don't take any medication. Maybe I should. I'm clearly not coping with my life and I have latched onto the first person that has shown me any genuine kindness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The only way you will mess it uo is by not trusting and keeping tabs....

I feel for you and your situation,but you do need to sort yourself out before you can be with anybody..as somebody has already said..

There is no relationship if there is no trust...

Talk to him and tell him how your feeling if you feel that close to him,and ask what he feels,and ask him to be really honest about it so you can deal with whatever he says...

I hope all goes well with you both..

The problem with trusting someone is them not being trustworthy.

If you have been betrayed it isn't easy to trust again.

You can give him a chance and see if he's being honest with you.

If he's not it's likely you will find out. Or, you could have a wonderful relationship with him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was incredibly low and depressed, to the point of doing something stupid

I find it hard to trust anyone

I worry that I am going to blow things with him

I think sometimes he doesn't always tell me the truth

I feel like he'll never be honest

I'm fragile and I won't like the truth

I'm in recovery for an eating disorder

I'm depressed

I have Aspergers

I feel like I am going crazy

I feel crappy

All the above are your words

Read them and tell me that you think you are ready for a relationship

You need to deal with you

He won't make things better - only you and professional help will do that

He may provide an emotional crutch, but at what cost ?

Find the stronger, happier person in you, not in someone else

You're 29.

You've got a whole lifetime to share the new, rejuvenated, healthier, happier you with someone else

From your post, now isn't the time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it would help you to define the relationship in a way that will lessen the burden upon it, however possible. You're not in a monogamous longer term sexual relationship at this point, so he's probably better to establish for himself what is going on and what he may want - whilst you do the same.

Take care "

To clarify, we don't work together anymore, it was a temporary contract.

I do expect that, based on things he has said. I'm finding it hard to access wider support at the moment. Waiting lists for everything are huge.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I was incredibly low and depressed, to the point of doing something stupid

I find it hard to trust anyone

I worry that I am going to blow things with him

I think sometimes he doesn't always tell me the truth

I feel like he'll never be honest

I'm fragile and I won't like the truth

I'm in recovery for an eating disorder

I'm depressed

I have Aspergers

I feel like I am going crazy

I feel crappy

All the above are your words

Read them and tell me that you think you are ready for a relationship

You need to deal with you

He won't make things better - only you and professional help will do that

He may provide an emotional crutch, but at what cost ?

Find the stronger, happier person in you, not in someone else

You're 29.

You've got a whole lifetime to share the new, rejuvenated, healthier, happier you with someone else

From your post, now isn't the time "

I'm being selfish to want to hang onto him aren't I?

It's just going to mess him up too and I don't want that. I care enough about him to back off and not be a part of his life anymore.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Back off - you are behaving as if you both have a different relationship type.

Go slowly. Ease the pressure on the two of you

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I was incredibly low and depressed, to the point of doing something stupid

I find it hard to trust anyone

I worry that I am going to blow things with him

I think sometimes he doesn't always tell me the truth

I feel like he'll never be honest

I'm fragile and I won't like the truth

I'm in recovery for an eating disorder

I'm depressed

I have Aspergers

I feel like I am going crazy

I feel crappy

All the above are your words

Read them and tell me that you think you are ready for a relationship

You need to deal with you

He won't make things better - only you and professional help will do that

He may provide an emotional crutch, but at what cost ?

Find the stronger, happier person in you, not in someone else

You're 29.

You've got a whole lifetime to share the new, rejuvenated, healthier, happier you with someone else

From your post, now isn't the time "

These are wise words.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was incredibly low and depressed, to the point of doing something stupid

I find it hard to trust anyone

I worry that I am going to blow things with him

I think sometimes he doesn't always tell me the truth

I feel like he'll never be honest

I'm fragile and I won't like the truth

I'm in recovery for an eating disorder

I'm depressed

I have Aspergers

I feel like I am going crazy

I feel crappy

All the above are your words

Read them and tell me that you think you are ready for a relationship

You need to deal with you

He won't make things better - only you and professional help will do that

He may provide an emotional crutch, but at what cost ?

Find the stronger, happier person in you, not in someone else

You're 29.

You've got a whole lifetime to share the new, rejuvenated, healthier, happier you with someone else

From your post, now isn't the time

I'm being selfish to want to hang onto him aren't I?

It's just going to mess him up too and I don't want that. I care enough about him to back off and not be a part of his life anymore."

It's not about messing anyone up

It's about getting YOU right

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

Honest answer: yes he may well have been on a date. End of the day you have met him on a swingers’ website. I doubt a single bloke on here is looking for dates/monogamy.

This site also is not the place to be if you’re in any way mentally fragile - I can understand the eating disorder and depression and I really, really, really get the Aspergers (my kid bro is on the autistic spectrum).

The best thing you can do is to forget him and delete/hide your account for the time being.

I mean that nicely x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men can smell desperate/clingy vibes and it causes a chemical reaction in their brain to retreat from the thing that’s chasing them (not calling you a thing btw)

I was hoping you would see this thread."

Hope the op takes notice!

It’s not too late at this stage for damage control, any more of the behaviour she’s displaying and there will be nothing to salvage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

Honest answer: yes he may well have been on a date. End of the day you have met him on a swingers’ website. I doubt a single bloke on here is looking for dates/monogamy.

The best thing you can do is to forget him and delete/hide your account for the time being.

I mean that nicely x

You're right. I just wanted to say goodbye and to explain but he won't pick up (understandable, if he is on a date)

I don't know how to start with getting 'better' but he doesn't deserve to be the one that I burden with this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Men can smell desperate/clingy vibes and it causes a chemical reaction in their brain to retreat from the thing that’s chasing them (not calling you a thing btw)

I was hoping you would see this thread.

Hope the op takes notice!

It’s not too late at this stage for damage control, any more of the behaviour she’s displaying and there will be nothing to salvage. "

I'm clearly taking notice...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

Sorry but the advice is what a women on here would give a men, are you sure you're in the right site, shouldn't you be on a dating site if you want exclusivity?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

Sorry but the advice is what a women on here would give a men, are you sure you're in the right site, shouldn't you be on a dating site if you want exclusivity?"

I didn't want it until he offered it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better' "

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

I'm driving myself nuts over this and it's any ugly situation to expect him to be a part of. I just want to talk to him but he isn't picking up. I'm making myself look like a psychopath.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

Honest answer: yes he may well have been on a date. End of the day you have met him on a swingers’ website. I doubt a single bloke on here is looking for dates/monogamy.

The best thing you can do is to forget him and delete/hide your account for the time being.

I mean that nicely x

You're right. I just wanted to say goodbye and to explain but he won't pick up (understandable, if he is on a date)

I don't know how to start with getting 'better' but he doesn't deserve to be the one that I burden with this."

You’re viewing this in the wrong way.

You’ve met him on a swingers website. He’s not here for monogamy - no single bloke on here is.

More importantly, you need to be thinking about yourself, and not about him.

You need to prioritise your own mental wellbeing, delete your account on here, and stop dwelling on him x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men can smell desperate/clingy vibes and it causes a chemical reaction in their brain to retreat from the thing that’s chasing them (not calling you a thing btw)

I was hoping you would see this thread.

Hope the op takes notice!

It’s not too late at this stage for damage control, any more of the behaviour she’s displaying and there will be nothing to salvage.

I'm clearly taking notice..."

You said he wanted to meet you this coming Thursday and Saturday? Trust that it will happen. Please don’t message or call him. Don’t send messages saying you just want to say goodbye or anything like that. It’s hard to listen to advice but if your future self came and spoke to you and said look I know what’s gonna happen and if you do this then this will happen but if you do this then this will happen. Calling him/texting him, bombarding him with all these signs that you need him or relying on him then he will remove you from his life, this will happen.

You back off now, be cool, try and occupy yourself when you feel like contacting him, be confident that the site is hard for men to get a bite so you don’t need to worry about anything and he will meet you again, that will happen.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get yourself away from fab, go see a DR for some mental health guidance, sort yourself out first. Learn to love yourself before you start into any form of relationship it sounds like your in a really dark place mentally and allowing this to make Ur life worse than it already is ..best of luck and hope you do get mental help op

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By *allSteveMan
over a year ago

Poole

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Ever been to a GP with mental health issues??

They are totally useless and have no idea how to deal with someone that has real needs. Can't just give a prescription and expect it to go away.

At one point I was given Tamazepam and Diazepam at the same time. Not exactly a great combination for someone with psychiatric thoughts constantly going through their mind. GP my ass

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Can't you call at 8 am tomorrow for a same day emergency appointment?

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

If he said you will be exclusive he should have delete his account, and then you yours.

Problem with deleting yours is you won't be on here to see if he lied.

Therein lies the problem. I can't just let myself trust him. I ruin things before they have a chance to start because I'm too fucking damaged to have a functioning relationship of any kind"

Well in that case you need to stop with him and work on yourself first before even trying...

You will only end up damaging yourself more....you need to learn to love yourself before you can attempt to love somebody else...

Sounds like you need your own head space first before letting anybody else in...x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Can't you call at 8 am tomorrow for a same day emergency appointment?"

Most of the GPs at my surgery are rude and dismissive and don't know any of my back history. The one that understands and doesn't patronise me has a waiting list as long as my arm.

I feel really shitty tonight and I don't think I'm going to actively do anything but I don't want to feel like this anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Ever been to a GP with mental health issues??

They are totally useless and have no idea how to deal with someone that has real needs. Can't just give a prescription and expect it to go away.

At one point I was given Tamazepam and Diazepam at the same time. Not exactly a great combination for someone with psychiatric thoughts constantly going through their mind. GP my ass"

Where do you suggest then ?

Rather than throwing scorn, throw some sage advice in

It seems evident that the lady has got herself into a tizz at least or is currently in crisis at worst

So, if you've been there, try and make your contribution valid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Hmmm yeah that’s not good.

However in 2016 I had a first meet with a guy I’d been speaking to for a while, was when the World Cup started and he said he would come over mine. I did a nice hot buffet, sticky chicken skewers, garlic bread, wedges and bought some woo woo frozen cocktails and cleaned my house top to bottom. He didn’t turn up, I must have rang him about 50 times sent him texts calling him all the cunts under the sun, said I knew he lived by IKEA and I’d find his house and kick his head in for standing me up, he called the next day saying he got too pisses watching the football and was sorry. I met him the following weekend but didn’t fancy him in the flesh so had to discard him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Dont worry about any of that now. I would echo the advice of others of stepping away from him and fab if you can and making yourself stronger first. Hope the help is out there for you and perhaps just try your doctors first thing, there are always emergency appointments if needed. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That was old me by the way, I’m different now

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Please, please stop doing that to yourself.

If he hasn’t responded after one missed call that’s all you need to know.

Please don’t keep calling/texting him, put your phone down away, preferably block him.

And then move on x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Ever been to a GP with mental health issues??

They are totally useless and have no idea how to deal with someone that has real needs. Can't just give a prescription and expect it to go away.

At one point I was given Tamazepam and Diazepam at the same time. Not exactly a great combination for someone with psychiatric thoughts constantly going through their mind. GP my ass"

I, and many other people have and it helped us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Definitely see your GP. I was on the floor and couldn't get any lower except for the obvious and my husband rang my GP.

It took medication, some visits to a psychiatrist and therapy, but I'm here now almost 20 years later.

You have to start somewhere.

I have an appointment on the 12th Dec for my ED check up. I couldn't get in any sooner.

If I hadn't already messed things up I have now, with 8 calls, 3 texts and 8 Whatsapps

Can't you call at 8 am tomorrow for a same day emergency appointment?

Most of the GPs at my surgery are rude and dismissive and don't know any of my back history. The one that understands and doesn't patronise me has a waiting list as long as my arm.

I feel really shitty tonight and I don't think I'm going to actively do anything but I don't want to feel like this anymore."

Is there anyone you can take with you to back you up a bit against the rude docs. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It just hurts so much- I've been doing this for so long on my own and feeling like I have nobody on my side, and when I saw him on here it was like fate, and we got on so well and he said he'd be there for me and made me all these promises.

I've fucked it up, because wherever he is now, when he looks at his phone it's all over. There's no coming back from that.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

If you've missed your fluoxetine or equivalent recently that may have contributed to the feeling.

That being said, I may have it entirely wrong.

Either way, I wish you nothing but the best in this difficult situation!

I don't take any medication. Maybe I should. I'm clearly not coping with my life and I have latched onto the first person that has shown me any genuine kindness "

Try St Johns Wort - if I ever get crazy stressed over something it just makes it all seem doable for me, I can't recommend it highly enough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men can say all kinds of crap when they want sex. I genuinely want you to feel better, no more messaging him or calling him ok. Just try and sleep now, if he knows you had stuff going on he might over look the calls and texts but you must let him come to you. Don’t try and contact him. Wishing you all the best.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Ever been to a GP with mental health issues??

They are totally useless and have no idea how to deal with someone that has real needs. Can't just give a prescription and expect it to go away.

At one point I was given Tamazepam and Diazepam at the same time. Not exactly a great combination for someone with psychiatric thoughts constantly going through their mind. GP my ass

I, and many other people have and it helped us. "

Indeed. GPs are merely the gatekeeper for other mental health services.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Men can say all kinds of crap when they want sex. I genuinely want you to feel better, no more messaging him or calling him ok. Just try and sleep now, if he knows you had stuff going on he might over look the calls and texts but you must let him come to you. Don’t try and contact him. Wishing you all the best. "

I know I should sleep but I want some answers. I'm too wired and anxious to sleep, because now I am worried something has happened to him. I don't know what to think.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

Especially men on swingers’ websites.

There’s a lot of truth in the above statement OP. You need to delete him from your phone and move on...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I should sleep but I want some answers. I'm too wired and anxious to sleep, because now I am worried something has happened to him. I don't know what to think. "

To be blunt, he's had his fun and now has moved on to another chase!

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By *allSteveMan
over a year ago

Poole

I don't know how to start with getting 'better'

Getting an appointment with your GP would be a starting point

Reaching out to The Samaritans is useful out of hours if you are feeling so low

Ever been to a GP with mental health issues??

They are totally useless and have no idea how to deal with someone that has real needs. Can't just give a prescription and expect it to go away.

At one point I was given Tamazepam and Diazepam at the same time. Not exactly a great combination for someone with psychiatric thoughts constantly going through their mind. GP my ass

I, and many other people have and it helped us. "

Glad that it helped you. Im not saying all GP's are useless(even though the majority actually are). They will eventually get you assessed by someone more specialized. Would appear to me that the OP has issues that need addressing and is also aware of that herself. I never got the same level of help from my GP and eventually went and had a private assessment and psychiatric evaluation. Only once this was passed on to the surgery they really took any notice. Would like to say much has changed since then but unfortunately the NHS is far too stretched with its budget and I'm not getting involved in a political discussion. OP is welcome to DM if would like to chat

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Especially men on swingers’ websites.

There’s a lot of truth in the above statement OP. You need to delete him from your phone and move on... "

But he isn't just 'a man from a swingers site!' We worked together, we already knew each other- we talked on Facebook. It's just coincidence he was on here too.

And if he had had his fun and moved on then why has he made plans with me? Why is he still talking to me and making the effort?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I should sleep but I want some answers. I'm too wired and anxious to sleep, because now I am worried something has happened to him. I don't know what to think. "

He's fine. His eyeballs may be out on stalks looking at his phone, but relax. Xx

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

I know I should sleep but I want some answers. I'm too wired and anxious to sleep, because now I am worried something has happened to him. I don't know what to think. "

Again, and this is meant in the nicest possible way, do you imagine for one second that he’s racking his brain worrying about you?

I’m afraid you need to take exactly the same approach. X

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"It just hurts so much- I've been doing this for so long on my own and feeling like I have nobody on my side, and when I saw him on here it was like fate, and we got on so well and he said he'd be there for me and made me all these promises.

I've fucked it up, because wherever he is now, when he looks at his phone it's all over. There's no coming back from that."

Try not to despair - it could be that he is someone genuine who really likes you and will be totally forgiving as he knows full well how fragile you are.

Yes, it seems likely that someone is up to something they don't want you to know about when they are out of touch, but it isn't always so. There could be genuine reasons, or he could be trying to protect you - just wait now and let him get back to you in good time, see how he reacts to all your texts and calls.

If he still reacts positively - just tell him you're in a mess and don't know what's best to do for either of you and see what he suggests, maybe he will be there fore you as a friend for now. Good luck, I agree it'd be best to get to sleep if you can.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm going to go to bed, I can't hurt myself there (physically, I can still hurt myself emotionally and mentally)

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I'm going to go to bed, I can't hurt myself there (physically, I can still hurt myself emotionally and mentally)"

If in doubt - sleep!!! Have some warm milk if nothing else....

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

Especially men on swingers’ websites.

There’s a lot of truth in the above statement OP. You need to delete him from your phone and move on...

But he isn't just 'a man from a swingers site!' We worked together, we already knew each other- we talked on Facebook. It's just coincidence he was on here too.

And if he had had his fun and moved on then why has he made plans with me? Why is he still talking to me and making the effort?"

Take this from a bloke. The mixed messages are because of one of two possibilities as follows:

1. He just wants sex;

2. He isn’t sure what he wants generally (but, specifically, he probably wants more of 1), hence the mixed messages;

3. Neither 1 or 2 above is good for your own mental health.

Time to block and move on.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all of the (nice) replies. I will read through all of this and have a think about it all when I am less tired and sad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you rely on someone to make you feel better, it is bound to fail at some point amd make you feel even more dpressed than you were in the first place.

I personally would stop to see that person for sex, especially if I suspect that that person is not 100% honest. However, I never expect anyone to 100% honest anymore anyway. But still, if you think that he isn't honest and you fear that the truth will hurt you, do not look for it and walk away. Take care of yourself and do not rely on others to make you feel better or you will be disapointed at some point.

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By *atureandhornyCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

No room for jealousy in swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You don't say whether he's promised or offered any level of commitment other than the fun you've had so far. What are you expecting of him?

Unfortunately 99.9% of fab men tell you what they think you want to hear ... My advice is simply this ... Proceed with extreme caution x

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By *.gerri.xTV/TS
over a year ago

North west

I read this and thought awww bloody hell ,

I hope you're OK and a sleeps calmed you down a bit and he's had time to at least give you a ring.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for all of the (nice) replies. I will read through all of this and have a think about it all when I am less tired and sad. "

Hope you're feeling better today.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Hi op

Would agree with some of the advice given,ie ring and get an appointment sooner if you can face it.

Also ask for some therapy to try and help you cope with things when they get too much.

I hope you ade feeling better today ,none of us can say what his intentions are,but hope he has at least got in touch one way or another.

Miss xx

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

Hi OP.

The one thing I've noticed while reading over this thread is that everyone is seeing it as a Fab thing. But you knew each other long before either of you knew the other was on Fab... Fab was just the opportunity that allowed you to finally cross the line from being working acquaintances to something more intimate because your inhibitions were lowered. A boozy snog at the company Christmas party may have lead to the same thing...

Taking Fab out of the equation... How was your friendship before? Did he treat you well and with respect?

By the way... Don't delete off here and 'hope' he will follow suit... That's projecting your own wishes onto him and he probably won't even realise that's what you are hoping he will do. You'll just drive yourself crazy then wondering if he did it or not.

I'm not sure how long you've been seeing each other, but it sounds very intense, and having someone hang their happiness completely on you and especially if, as you say, you have previously expressed a desire to do something silly out of insecurity, is a colossal responsibility to put on anyone.

You're not going to want to hear this OP but you need to step back yourself before you completely destroy your friendship.

Trust takes time. Slow down and give it time to build. You can't flip a switch and suddenly be as committed as a long-term couple.

Enjoy each day for what it is and maybe at some point in the future you'll be pleasantly surprised to realise you've been together a while and it's something special

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By *lly24Man
over a year ago

Manchester.

"Hi OP.

I think you're missing the point. Yes there may have been a relationship ie friendship from previous but you have to accept that they've now met on a swingers site an the environment is different. Fwb is a different beast,jealousy has no place on this site. Men are here to have sex with as many as they can, yet constantly I see womens profiles like they're on a dating site looking for Mr right.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not."

It does happen. Plenty of men do expect exclusivity and behave in similar ways to the OP without having ever met even.

And I haven't missed the point, I was just offering a different perspective to the ones already offered. I'm not blinkered and can see other points of view to my own

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Update: we talked on the phone for an hour when he got home at 1am and I was a total dickhead to him and hung up on him.

For anyone in any doubt about who has the issue here, it's me. I'm doing very badly at the moment and I can't be around him. I do really like him and I'm going to miss talking to him but I've missed people before and it'll stop hurting eventually, hopefully

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

"Update: we talked on the phone for an hour when he got home at 1am and I was a total dickhead to him and hung up on him.

Glad to hear you're taking ownership of your situation OP. Hope you start to feel better soon!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not."

Yes they do, but funny enough, they'll ask if we have a female friend who can join us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Update: we talked on the phone for an hour when he got home at 1am and I was a total dickhead to him and hung up on him.

Glad to hear you're taking ownership of your situation OP. Hope you start to feel better soon! "

Thank you x

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

"Update: we talked on the phone for an hour when he got home at 1am and I was a total dickhead to him and hung up on him.

That sounds like a sensible approach

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not."

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Update: we talked on the phone for an hour when he got home at 1am and I was a total dickhead to him and hung up on him.

Ah well, 1am doesn't sound like a visit to the parents so maybe it's wise to leave it if he's not being straight with you and you're too fragile to cope with that right now.

Good luck OP, be well.

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By *ortobello SionnachWoman
over a year ago

Dublin

Who knows OP I guess you need to sit down and think things over. What ever happens good luck with it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You sound quite similar to my ex who struggled terribly with self esteem issues. If you are on the spectrum you should see your gp and have a psychological assessment to see where the problem lies. It sounds like you are very needy and the friendship has developed very quickly into something deeper for you at least and maybe he’s not ready to flip that switch so rapidly when it comes to exclusivity. My ex hated me being on here and chatting to other people and she was always suspicious of my motives. Possessiveness is very hard to deal with for most people and it does sound a bit like you jumped in feet first with your heart on your sleeve. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying there’s anything bad about you just that if you have been on your own for a long time and this relationship looks positive you really need to give him space and make him trust you. If he’s true then it will grow but if he’s fucking you around then it’s only your pride that will get dented. Good luck and try not to stress out about it.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick."

But equally *most* men on here probably aren’t looking for monogamy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick.

But equally *most* men on here probably aren’t looking for monogamy. "

Most but not all.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick.

But equally *most* men on here probably aren’t looking for monogamy. "

No, but this guy ASKED for exclusivity apparently. If men want to shag around then fine - as long as they don't deceive anyone into thinking otherwise and fuck with their heads, that wouldn't be fair would it.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick.

But equally *most* men on here probably aren’t looking for monogamy.

No, but some will say whatever is necessary in order to get what they want at that moment.

Expecting exclusivity/honesty from someone on a swingers’ site where people bend over backwards to remain anonymous and don’t even show their faces is a little naive, in my view.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A good friend or rather the guy who first introduced me to this site 8 years ago said to me that me being on here looking for a guy to be exclusive to me, a boyfriend essentially is like him going on Grindr and wondering where all the fit birds are.

Majority of single men on here are using this place as a stop gap to finding someone in the real world, majority of men would not date a woman from this site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel for you op, nobody is worth torturing yourself over for, please speak to someone.

Take a step back, you need to concentrate on you. If you get the chance talk to him. You feel like this because of the insecurity.

I went through this with my fwb, I found talking honestly with him helped, I recognised how unreasonable I could be horrible to him when he wouldn't message me or reply back,

Over time as I got to know him better, and he spoke honestly about his ADHD I realised actually, it isn't him being an arse, it's the way his thought process works, easily forgetful and flits from one thing to another, he goes in cycles, from work, me, his music, his family. He said not many people can cope with him, as they don't understand, I know him well enough now to be able to tell if he hasn't taken his meds, he'd forget, or think he he doesn't need them, then have a blowout, he has lost friends and girlfriends because they don't understand him or cope with him, gladly I have his trust and that helps.

So you never know, he may be dealing with his own issues as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi OP.

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not.

But it was the man that asked her!!!!

And no, not all men on here want to shag as many women as they can, that gets very old very quick.

But equally *most* men on here probably aren’t looking for monogamy.

No, but some will say whatever is necessary in order to get what they want at that moment.

Expecting exclusivity/honesty from someone on a swingers’ site where people bend over backwards to remain anonymous and don’t even show their faces is a little naive, in my view. "

I only meet people who show their faces. I’m always a little suspicious of others who are very discreet etc. Just prefer more open people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

Don't really get the point of asking if you're going to condition responses by saying pretty much you only want people to post in agreement. So I'll say nothing. The direct answer to your topic is yes, very.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

I only meet people who show their faces. I’m always a little suspicious of others who are very discreet etc. Just prefer more open people. "

Sure, I am suspicious of people who talk too much of discretion, have no public pics or have any hesitation in sharing face pics privately, I am very open and honest with the people I decide to meet and require the same from them.

But I still would not want eg my clients knowing about my private life, and remain astonished anyone would, quite apart from the dangers of stalkers etc. I know people with high-powered jobs who have been threatened with blackm@il by jilted women, it's just not worth the risk IMO.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Please don't make horrible or dismissive comments, I feel crappy enough as it is

OP is obviously in a fragile position and asking for some kindness, but if a guy did promise her one thing and do another she still has every right to be livid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Flip the situation around, should the man expect a woman off here to be exclusive to him?I think not."

You'd be surprised the number of men who ask women to be exclusive to them...the old double standards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only meet people who show their faces. I’m always a little suspicious of others who are very discreet etc. Just prefer more open people.

Totally understand that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hugs OP I hope you feel ok this eve xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

For anyone that is interested, I went to see him last night and we talked and cleared the air- I think we both felt better but I am going to take some time to seriously get my head together. I did speak to my ADHD nurse today and have arranged to go see her face to face, I have a GP appointment booked, and am going to a group meeting next week to hopefully build a bit of a support network.

Thank you for all of the helpful replied in the thread and the nice messages (we won't talk about the person who thought it appropriate to tell me to kill myself)

I'm going to get better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For anyone that is interested, I went to see him last night and we talked and cleared the air- I think we both felt better but I am going to take some time to seriously get my head together. I did speak to my ADHD nurse today and have arranged to go see her face to face, I have a GP appointment booked, and am going to a group meeting next week to hopefully build a bit of a support network.

Thank you for all of the helpful replied in the thread and the nice messages (we won't talk about the person who thought it appropriate to tell me to kill myself)

I'm going to get better

Glad to hear that and you take care of yourself first xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for all of the helpful replied in the thread and the nice messages (we won't talk about the person who thought it appropriate to tell me to kill myself)

I'm going to get better

Yes you are going to get better.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Thank you for all of the helpful replied in the thread and the nice messages (we won't talk about the person who thought it appropriate to tell me to kill myself)

I'm going to get better

Brave, positive steps.

Well done and I wish you well.

Hug of support.

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By *hite1100Man
over a year ago

Hither Green

Thank you for all of the helpful replied in the thread and the nice messages (we won't talk about the person who thought it appropriate to tell me to kill myself)

I'm going to get better

Very pleased to hear that x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a long and winding road filled with diversions and dead ends, but YOU can do this.

Never be afraid of (or feel daft for) posting here, especially at night when it's quiet and dark.

There are a lot of good people here and if their advice or company gets you through to the next day, it is worth the effort to reach out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's a long and winding road filled with diversions and dead ends, but YOU can do this.

Never be afraid of (or feel daft for) posting here, especially at night when it's quiet and dark.

There are a lot of good people here and if their advice or company gets you through to the next day, it is worth the effort to reach out."

It did help having people here to talk to- I know a lot of people would be like 'why is she posting that stuff here' but it's easy to forget that we're all real people with real lives and feelings and if someone doesn't want to get involved they don't have to.

I'm already feeling more straightened out in my head than I was- I feel like things are a bit more manageable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a long and winding road filled with diversions and dead ends, but YOU can do this.

Never be afraid of (or feel daft for) posting here, especially at night when it's quiet and dark.

There are a lot of good people here and if their advice or company gets you through to the next day, it is worth the effort to reach out."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a long and winding road filled with diversions and dead ends, but YOU can do this.

Never be afraid of (or feel daft for) posting here, especially at night when it's quiet and dark.

There are a lot of good people here and if their advice or company gets you through to the next day, it is worth the effort to reach out.

I'm already feeling more straightened out in my head than I was- I feel like things are a bit more manageable

Good news.

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