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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis

What's the worst chat up line you've either heard or attempted to use?

A favourite of mine is one that a friend used to use, "Marks out of ten? I'd give you one." Surprisingly it never worked...

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

I can see why haha

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By *onyGalWoman
over a year ago

leeds

This morning “do you have pet insurance because I’m going to break that pussy”

JOG. ON.

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

Nice legs. What time do they open?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I used to know a guy who when in nightclubs, would introduce himself to ladies with, and I quote, ‘Hey pussy’.

His subsequent success rate was minimal to non existent.

(For the record, it wasn’t me by the way)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you have any Italian in you?

When I said no, he asked would you like some

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have pet insurance because I’m going to break that pussy”

JOG. ON. "

I got the same message

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


"This morning “do you have pet insurance because I’m going to break that pussy”

JOG. ON.

I got the same message "

That's him busted then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you have any Italian in you?

When I said no, he asked would you like some "

Do you have any Irish in you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I ruffle up your hair and see what it looks like when you wake up beside me in the morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you have any Italian in you?

When I said no, he asked would you like some "

Can't blame the guy really can you

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Is that a mirror in your knickers....

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…


"Can I ruffle up your hair and see what it looks like when you wake up beside me in the morning "

I quite like that one *jotting it down for future useage*

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


"‘You look like my daughter!’ "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got a message of a young lad of 21 saying he would pay me to duck my knob

Easiest £20 I've ever earned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got a message of a young lad of 21 saying he would pay me to duck my knob

Easiest £20 I've ever earned "

Suck*

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By *onyGalWoman
over a year ago

leeds


"‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’"

Also had the you make my girlfriend look like shit one. Errr is that supposed to be a compliment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got a message of a young lad of 21 saying he would pay me to duck my knob

Easiest £20 I've ever earned "

Duck it in what?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’

Also had the you make my girlfriend look like shit one. Errr is that supposed to be a compliment "

Yep I’ve had that one too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got a message of a young lad of 21 saying he would pay me to duck my knob

Easiest £20 I've ever earned

Duck it in what?"

My bloody phone!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mate over there wants your number. So he knows how to get hold of me in the morning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’

Also had the you make my girlfriend look like shit one. Errr is that supposed to be a compliment "

Bloody hell where have you been hiding!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’

Also had the you make my girlfriend look like shit one. Errr is that supposed to be a compliment

Yep I’ve had that one too "

We’ve all had it I reckon

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire


"Can I ruffle up your hair and see what it looks like when you wake up beside me in the morning "

Like this one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you have any Italian in you?

When I said no, he asked would you like some

Do you have any Irish in you? "

A lot of us women can say yes to that

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"This morning “do you have pet insurance because I’m going to break that pussy”

JOG. ON.

I got the same message

That's him busted then "

Yeah, I've had that too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

He keeps on coming back every few months.

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

"

Seriously?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

He keeps on coming back every few months.

"

I've not had that exact one, but I've had others like it.

Pro tip: don't start with threats of violence or anything that might be generally considered disgusting. If we're both into it, we can get there! But even if I am into it (check my interests for a clue), opening with wanting to break me etc will just get you blocked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

Seriously? "

Yes I just searched and he is still an active user on fab.

Username and profile pretty much say it all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have any of you women ever been chatted up in the real world? I would hardly say what you have been asked are chat up lines, rather chancing it lines

My favourites are 'get your coat, you've pulled'

And 'here's 10p.. go and call your mum and tell her you won't be coming home tonight' (obvs pre mobile phone days)

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

Seriously? "

A single female profile on Fab is a fascinating study into the depths of depravity a human mind can reach.

It's amazing the things that now only elicit an eye roll out of me, rather than dry heaving.

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

Seriously?

A single female profile on Fab is a fascinating study into the depths of depravity a human mind can reach.

It's amazing the things that now only elicit an eye roll out of me, rather than dry heaving. "

I honestly didn't think I was naive but it seems that's not the case

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By *idsBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Tamworth

Sit on my face and I’ll eat my way to your heart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

He keeps on coming back every few months.

"

Yep I get him a lot too. I block and he comes back with a different name

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By *onyGalWoman
over a year ago

leeds


"‘You look like my daughter!’

‘You make my girlfriend look like shit’

‘If I promise not to cum can I fuck you’

Also had the you make my girlfriend look like shit one. Errr is that supposed to be a compliment

Bloody hell where have you been hiding!! "

Me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sit on my face and I’ll eat my way to your heart. "

That’s a good un

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By *onyGalWoman
over a year ago

leeds


"Have any of you women ever been chatted up in the real world? I would hardly say what you have been asked are chat up lines, rather chancing it lines

My favourites are 'get your coat, you've pulled'

And 'here's 10p.. go and call your mum and tell her you won't be coming home tonight' (obvs pre mobile phone days) "

I don’t really remember them from face to face encounters, I laugh and move on quickly

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By *idsBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Tamworth


"Sit on my face and I’ll eat my way to your heart.

That’s a good un "

Gotta be honest it’s one of my favourites, although I hasten to add I’ve never used it

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


"Sit on my face and I’ll eat my way to your heart. "

For added effect you could have some fava beans and a nice bottle of chianti in view when you use that line

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By *idsBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Tamworth


"Sit on my face and I’ll eat my way to your heart.

For added effect you could have some fava beans and a nice bottle of chianti in view when you use that line "

Or as one of my friends suggested: stick my tongue out. She said I could get half way there with that alone

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


"I can see why haha "

I'm sure it was down to his rubbish delivery

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


""Can I be your slave? You can use me as a toilet."

Seriously?

A single female profile on Fab is a fascinating study into the depths of depravity a human mind can reach.

It's amazing the things that now only elicit an eye roll out of me, rather than dry heaving.

I honestly didn't think I was naive but it seems that's not the case "

It's an addition to rule 34. If it can be imagined, porn exists of it... And someone thinks it appropriate to send to a complete stranger on Fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have pet insurance because I’m going to break that pussy”

JOG. ON. "

I got that one too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock” "

I meant that as a threat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock”

I meant that as a threat "

Good job I’m covered then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock”

I meant that as a threat "
Your dark side intensifies!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock”

I meant that as a threat

Good job I’m covered then "

You can lie and say you had a better one when you make the claim.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This morning “do you have farmyard pet insurance because I’m going to break that cock”

I meant that as a threat Your dark side intensifies!"

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By *ynetaurusMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Would you cut the fat off the bacon for me in the morning?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know what would look good on you?

....me!!

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By *MP3 OP   Man
over a year ago

Between Scylla and Charybdis


"I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock! "

Now this I like

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Making a note of the hair ruffling one

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

How do you like your eggs in the morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock! "

I’ve always liked this one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock!

I’ve always liked this one "

The classics are the best..Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

A woman at work I commented that she looked "very pretty in that short summer frock". It worked!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Step away from the bar you’re melting all the ice

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By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton


"Step away from the bar you’re melting all the ice "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A woman at work I commented that she looked "very pretty in that short summer frock". It worked!"
m

Even though you used the word frock?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My favourite line, when talking to women in nightclubs, was saying I was gay porn star, when asked what I did for a living. Hardly a chat up line but kept the conversation going.

Opening gambit was generally "Do you want a light or a drink or whatever?", never smoked myself but used to carry a lighter. Got the conversation started if they were interested and didn't cost a fortune in drinks. Not the same now you can't smoke inside clubs, but I don't approach strangers anywhere near as much as I used to

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