FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Thoughts please

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So, sorry for the random. Having a bit of a conundrum.

So, I work with children, in a role I'm well over qualified for and basically, I'm bored in, my role. I was taken on as temporary maternity, and just don't know what will happen, I took the job on temporary as I was struggling with bereavement, a means to an end until I figured out what I want.

Last week I went for an interview and got offered the job straight away, more money, more responsibility, in a role suited to my quals and background, good prospects, perks.

Great! However on handing in my notice my boss got upset, said she didn't want to lose me, but agreed my role doesn't match my background and said a higher level post will be available, and it had been earmarked for me.

I said about needing some security, and that with two staff members being pregnant, I didn't want to be moved from one maternity cover to another, again she agreed.

Within the hour of leaving her office I get a call off her asking if I'd consider staying if she can secure me a full time contract, she needed time to speak to the college.

Anyway, college have agreed I'm to have a full time contract and a higher level role.

So, in a tizz of whether to stay or go. My boss is lovely, and I felt like I'd kicked a puppy on telling her, my colleagues don't want me to leave. I feel torn.

Where I work it's on my doorstep, the new role is 40 minutes away.

So, do I stay for the emotional attachments, they were amazing when I was going through a tough time. Or do I follow my head and look for a new challenge.

Need to decide by Thursday, as HR are keen to get a contract in place.

Sorry, I suppose i'm trying to clarify it all.

TIA all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I moved for more money and a bigger role

My boss is a douche bag

However I'm glad I loved because now I can move on again somewhere better I hope

Hope it works out for you x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

If youre bored in the role now, will it be any different with a new contract at the same place?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I moved for more money and a bigger role

My boss is a douche bag

However I'm glad I loved because now I can move on again somewhere better I hope

Hope it works out for you x"

Just got to keep moving forward haven't you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ddibleMan
over a year ago

Exeter Bristol Salisbury

If you stay- would you be staying for you or them?

Is the new job what you want to do? (I didn't get the impression your current job is)

If they got offered a better job, would they stay for you?

What do you want to do?

No the grass is not always greener- it's just different grass

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If youre bored in the role now, will it be any different with a new contract at the same place?"

I hear what you're saying, and you're right.

I suppose it's the offer of the senior role as well as the contract.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you stay- would you be staying for you or them?

Is the new job what you want to do? (I didn't get the impression your current job is)

If they got offered a better job, would they stay for you?

What do you want to do?

No the grass is not always greener- it's just different grass

Good luck"

Very true, that is what I need to ask myself I suppose.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have already made the decision to go once then it's probably the right thing to do.

Waiting until your leaving before offering you something better does seem a bit like an employer looking solely after their interests, that's normal.

Just how hard will it be to stay motivated where you are, and in a few months will you be looking around again? If you feel that's the case then perhaps a new challenge has more to offer?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you have already made the decision to go once then it's probably the right thing to do.

Waiting until your leaving before offering you something better does seem a bit like an employer looking solely after their interests, that's normal.

Just how hard will it be to stay motivated where you are, and in a few months will you be looking around again? If you feel that's the case then perhaps a new challenge has more to offer?"

Very true.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

It's a tricky one.

Write a list of the pros and cons of both jobs. Be honest with yourself about what you want.

Is it the new challenges or the security of a permanent contract?

Don't get railroaded into a decision just because they now want an answer by Thursday...I'd ask the question why you weren't offered a permanent position in your current position prior to this other job offer.

Also if they do now want to hang on to you, you are in a strong position to say what you want/ expect in terms of training and progression. If it's going to be same old and you are finding that boring already I'd be I inclined to go for the new job.

Well done for being in demand...You are in a strong position so think carefully and do what is right for you.

Good luck x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It's a tricky one.

Write a list of the pros and cons of both jobs. Be honest with yourself about what you want.

Is it the new challenges or the security of a permanent contract?

Don't get railroaded into a decision just because they now want an answer by Thursday...I'd ask the question why you weren't offered a permanent position in your current position prior to this other job offer.

Also if they do now want to hang on to you, you are in a strong position to say what you want/ expect in terms of training and progression. If it's going to be same old and you are finding that boring already I'd be I inclined to go for the new job.

Well done for being in demand...You are in a strong position so think carefully and do what is right for you.

Good luck x

"

Thank you, good idea.

And yeah, tbh I don't need extra training, I have an hons degree in my field, and also a management degree, I'd need te higher role offer written into the contract I think as a guarantee.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"It's a tricky one.

Write a list of the pros and cons of both jobs. Be honest with yourself about what you want.

Is it the new challenges or the security of a permanent contract?

Don't get railroaded into a decision just because they now want an answer by Thursday...I'd ask the question why you weren't offered a permanent position in your current position prior to this other job offer.

Also if they do now want to hang on to you, you are in a strong position to say what you want/ expect in terms of training and progression. If it's going to be same old and you are finding that boring already I'd be I inclined to go for the new job.

Well done for being in demand...You are in a strong position so think carefully and do what is right for you.

Good luck x

"

I was about to type pretty much that - so you've saved me the trouble

Moving for more money isn't always the answer though OP - I did that 7 years ago and have regretted it ever since, went from a company where I was known and respected and actually enjoyed the job mostly to one where I've never felt that, but have ended up stuck because I am at the upper end of my pay grade and that tends to rule me out of other jobs who can get similar for less money.

The only other thing I'd say is it's fairly standard practice to not offer better terms and conditions until a company has to, why would they need to, so I'd not put too much thought into the "why are they only offering it now" thing.

Good puck with whatever you decide

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It's a tricky one.

Write a list of the pros and cons of both jobs. Be honest with yourself about what you want.

Is it the new challenges or the security of a permanent contract?

Don't get railroaded into a decision just because they now want an answer by Thursday...I'd ask the question why you weren't offered a permanent position in your current position prior to this other job offer.

Also if they do now want to hang on to you, you are in a strong position to say what you want/ expect in terms of training and progression. If it's going to be same old and you are finding that boring already I'd be I inclined to go for the new job.

Well done for being in demand...You are in a strong position so think carefully and do what is right for you.

Good luck x

I was about to type pretty much that - so you've saved me the trouble

Moving for more money isn't always the answer though OP - I did that 7 years ago and have regretted it ever since, went from a company where I was known and respected and actually enjoyed the job mostly to one where I've never felt that, but have ended up stuck because I am at the upper end of my pay grade and that tends to rule me out of other jobs who can get similar for less money.

The only other thing I'd say is it's fairly standard practice to not offer better terms and conditions until a company has to, why would they need to, so I'd not put too much thought into the "why are they only offering it now" thing.

Good puck with whatever you decide"

Thank you.

Lots of thinking to do.

Sorry if anyone is offended by my post, already had one abusive message for it. Oh well, such is life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Don't be sorry - it's an open forum and you're as entitled to use it as much as the next person.

Can't possibly think why anyone would be offended by it anyway and frankly if they are it says more about them than you.

One other thing to factor into your thinking - you said the other job is 40 mins travel each way, compared to 10 minutes currently - it may not seem a lot when you think about it but it's amazing how much that can affect things not only in terms of extra time lost but also the additional cost of getting there and back that may even balance out any difference in pay between the two

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't be sorry - it's an open forum and you're as entitled to use it as much as the next person.

Can't possibly think why anyone would be offended by it anyway and frankly if they are it says more about them than you.

One other thing to factor into your thinking - you said the other job is 40 mins travel each way, compared to 10 minutes currently - it may not seem a lot when you think about it but it's amazing how much that can affect things not only in terms of extra time lost but also the additional cost of getting there and back that may even balance out any difference in pay between the two "

Thank you, apparently I shouldn't of posted I work with Children.

And yeah, was wary of posting tbh, because of that fear of abuse, but thought sod it, everyone who has posted has been lovely, and given me lots to think about so thank you all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toss a coin. You'll know then which way you want it to land. Good luck x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Toss a coin. You'll know then which way you want it to land. Good luck x"

Thank you!

Decided to follow my head and leave. This opportunity is too good to miss.

Heartbroken because the girls I work with are lovely, and we really have bonded. But I would be staying for everyone else's benefit, and not mine, when I need the progression for me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Toss a coin. You'll know then which way you want it to land. Good luck x

Thank you!

Decided to follow my head and leave. This opportunity is too good to miss.

Heartbroken because the girls I work with are lovely, and we really have bonded. But I would be staying for everyone else's benefit, and not mine, when I need the progression for me."

Good luck! There will be lovely new people to make friends with at the new place. Also you could stay in touch with your current friends.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

The advantage of moving on .is that the current boss will be happy to have you back if it all goes tits up at the new place

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top