FabSwingers.com forum: Poetic licence

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a bovine named Keith,

Who had such pearly white teeth,

He liked to show off his smile,

And pose next to a stile,

Till the girl cows all mooed “He’s prime beef”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've read worse.

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

It’s certainly far better than that composed by the present Poet Laureate m’lady

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've read worse."

I’ve written worse

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a young lady from Devizes

Whose breasts were two different sizes.

One was so small

It was nothing at all,

But the other was huge and won prizes

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By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

Technically speaking Keith would be a Bovidae -unless this is cow boylady territory we are getting into. But then again if he were really Bovidae -there are all sorts of other problems to sort out (is he a gooat sheep., cow etc.)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was was a woman called Bella

She looked at some pics by Estella

She gave them a fab,

As all the men here are drab,

Because basically who needs a fella

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By *ong-legged-divaTV/TS
over a year ago

Fleetwood

On the breast of a barmaid named Gail

Were tattooed the prices of ale

And on her behind

For the sake of the blind

Were the same but written in Braille

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was was a woman called Bella

She looked at some pics by Estella

She gave them a fab,

As all the men here are drab,

Because basically who needs a fella "
A star ya big swat

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Technically speaking Keith would be a Bovidae -unless this is cow boylady territory we are getting into. But then again if he were really Bovidae -there are all sorts of other problems to sort out (is he a gooat sheep., cow etc.)"

If it was good enough for Ogden Nash...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once joined a website called Fab,

After thinking my life had got drab.

I soon found the forum,

And lost my decorum.

Don't worry, I'll call my own cab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I once joined a website called Fab,

After thinking my life had got drab.

I soon found the forum,

And lost my decorum.

Don't worry, I'll call my own cab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm loving this thread, thanks chaps and chapettes

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By *tirluvMan
over a year ago

the right frame of mind -London

If it was good enough for Ogden Nash...

he'd be sure to have a bash

On his cute little fella

But what did padre tellya

About givin the bishop a lash

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was was a woman called Bella

She looked at some pics by Estella

She gave them a fab,

As all the men here are drab,

Because basically who needs a fella "

There was a woman called Bellaseas

Who made me go weak at the knees

She disses Fab men

But I hope she’ll think again

Please Fab me too, Bella please!

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

There once was a man from Nantucket

Whose cock was so long he could suck it

He said with a grin,

As he wiped off his chin

"If my ear was a c*nt I would fuck it!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a man from Darjeling

Who boarded a bus bound for Ealing

He saw on the door

Please dont spit on the floor

So he stood up and spat on the ceiling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a man called DanBerks

Being his friend has plenty of perks

He's friendly and chatty,

His dress sense is natty,

And in the forum he often lurks

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

There once was a virgin from Wick. Who said to her Mum. What's a prick.

She said it's like a piece of gristle, you stick up your piss hole, and waggle it round until its sick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a guy on here named PB

Who’ll happily bend you over his knee

Blondes Brunettes or Redheads are free

To flirt and maybe enjoy an evening with he..

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By *roticGoddessXXWoman
over a year ago

Richmond

There once was a cowboy named Keith

who spoke with a lisp and said peath;

so instead of lube

he used buckets of gloob

so the bovines were happily greathed

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a rooster called Jock,

He was a virile, magnificent cock,

Salutations at dawn,

Without so much of a yawn,

That’s until he became chicken stock.

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By *roticGoddessXXWoman
over a year ago

Richmond

There once was a cowboy named Keith

who spoke with a lisp and said peath;

so instead of lube

he used buckets of gloob

so the bovines were happily greathed"

OK, bad bad bad. I know. But top of my head. No other explanation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh fuck it fuck it fuck it.

I really have messed up.

I went and fucked a hunchback.

And now shes got the hump.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My cock is like Captain Birdeye.

It only has one eye.

And also wears a polar neck.

To keep it warm and dry.

I use to call it Speedy

Cos it came so very fast.

But now im getting older.

It tends to last and last.

Or maybe its my tablets.

Those happy pills i take.

Not only do they keep me sane.

Good lovin pills they make.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a penguin called Bob,

“No one loves me”, “I’m sad”, he did sob,

His GP, he said “you’re depressed,

lacking joy, anxious and stressed”,

And prescribed him buttered corn on the cob.

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By *moothCriminal_xMan
over a year ago

Redditch

There once was a girl from Nantucket

Whose mimsy was large as a bucket

She drinks like a fish

And will grant you a wish

And for an ounce of fresh powder she'll suck it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a couple from Crewe

The strangest young couple I knew

The wife never known

Bloke online alone

Went UNLOS then came back anew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

YeOldeWitchDoc lives in a flat

Surrounded by shitloads of tat

He talks out of his arse

Unaware of the farce

He creates cos he is a twat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've read worse.

I’ve written worse

Lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I knew a girl called Estella

She fell for a Scottish fella

They both liked to pay chess

Somewhere just outside Inverness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I knew a girl called Estella

She fell for a Scottish fella

They both liked to pay chess

Somewhere just outside Inverness "

And it turns out Estella's the best!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fab forums is known for its clique

Morning threads created by "Ubique"

Then of course there is Bladey

And lots of others (some Shady)

Who go unlos and return in a week

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a cockroach called Pete,

He thought being kind it was obsolete,

He was thus a dick,

A complete utter prick,

Now friendless, it’s all bittersweet.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a ‘gator named Dave,

His hunger pangs he tried to stave,

A fruit only fast,

His insides to blast,

But humans he continued to crave.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a man called Tom,

Who fancied himself as a dom,

He had ties and a cane,

And he could inflict pain,

When he spanked the ladies bottom.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a Duchess of Bray

Who, you might find it strange when I say,

In spite of her station,

And high education,

Would often spell cunt with a "K".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once someone new on these pages

Sharpened his decorum for ages

But his ardour glowed red

And he started a thread

"Breeder 4 slutz, no messages??!1"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ye olde tale of lust i tell.

One oft swordith blunder.

Back too eighteen i must go.

To telleth of life wonder.

Thee tale is oft a damsel fair.

And oft me a baseborn boy.

Drawn to lust i doeth swear.

One both oft sad and joy.

I did knoweth oft a girl.

Both sweet and innocent.

But her parents didnt liketh me.

So couldnt see her ment.

But every night at 8 bells toll.

I walketh to her dwelling.

And gazeth on her window did.

To see her. Both hearts swelling.

Then one eve her father knocked.

My daughters upt thee duff !

Shes only just her eighteeth year

Your been poking her sweet muff.

Im innocent i say to ye.

My virginity intact.

I have not touched a womans muff.

So not from me she duffed.

Furious her father left.

Then backeth home he saideth.

It wasnt pooreth wee jimmy who.

Got you up tbe duffest.

No it wasnt jimmy dad.

It was thee butchers boy.

He goteth his porkest chopeth out.

And used it as af toy.

Im sorry jim she saideth to me.

But dont act so damn meakly.

For thee past six months or so.

Ive sucketh your cock trice weekly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a cheetah called Chet,

He ran up an inconceivable debt,

He turned tricks all about,

To sort his debt out,

He’s now Hank the gazelle’s sex pet.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

There once was a guy called Steve

He often made people heave

But once in Hove

They said ‘by Jove’

And now they won’t ever leave

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a truck driver called Hank

Who decided to try his luck with a tank

The cannon he fervently plundered

But sadly mistakenly blundered

Blown up giving a missile a wank

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was an amoeba called Jill,

Who decided to come off the pill,

In a fit of psychosis,

Jill underwent meiosis,

With quadruplets she’s now got her fill.

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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago

Hereford

I can't read and I can't write,

But that don't really matter,

*insert slogan from rural county of choice here*

..and I can drive a tractor.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a slug called Jerome,

Over pebble and turf he did roam,

He sold the Big Issue,

Next to a stray bit of tissue,

As he dreamt of his very own home.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a woman named Dotty

Her photos did send my heart all knotty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a woman named Dotty

Her photos did send my heart all knotty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/11/18 08:03:08]

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

There once was a guy called Moriarty

Who's pictures got described as quite Arty

But what the girls didn't know was that they weren't just for show

They were to lure them to his in pants party.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tame Impala, oh what a guy!

He asks so much questions, I'm sure he's a spy.

He gives his opinion, he doesn't hold back,

Sometimes they're so weird though you'd swear he's on crack.

Now while I'm a lady and I shouldn't say,

You can't help but notice, it gets in the way.

Look at his photos you'll spot it real quick.

He's the proud owner of one massive dick!

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

There was a young woman called Dotty

She really was quite the fab hotty

She had such a great rack but looked just as good from the back

So much so that I shot my lot up her botty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a young woman called Dotty

She really was quite the fab hotty

She had such a great rack but looked just as good from the back

So much so that I shot my lot up her botty."

Damn it, I only thought knotty rhymes with Dotty.

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

There was a little nymph called Miss Red

Who spent an awful lot of time in my bed

She would start with a wank then sometimes give me a spank

Before finishing me off with some head.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now what can you say about that Mr M?

Just look at his photos, there's plenty of them.

He's the envy of fab when he goes to bed,

He gets to be filthy with delicious Miss Red.

I met him one night and he plied me with rum.

I'm not sure what happened but there's cum in my bum.

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

There once was a guy called Tame

Who displayed his big dick with no shame

He was proud of his big todger with which he would rodger

But the girls think they all look the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a handsome fella called Moriaty

Who’s cock was all beefy and hearty

He stuck it in Miss Redd, regularly it’s said

If only I’d been invited to that party

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a handsome fella called Moriaty

Who’s cock was all beefy and hearty

He stuck it in Miss Redd, regularly it’s said

If only I’d been invited to that party "

* Moriarty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s a lady I really want to bed,

She’s the OP of this very same thread,

I’ve known for while

I’m entranced by her smile

One day I’m sure we’ll be wed!

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"There’s a lady I really want to bed,

She’s the OP of this very same thread,

I’ve known for while

I’m entranced by her smile

One day I’m sure we’ll be wed!

Oh a Xmas wedding with snow would be amazing, how romantic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've only just seen this said Mary!

Though her view is often contrary,

Few fucks did she give,

But she wanted to live,

In a world where she could be lairy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a hedgehog named Bert,

Who liked to chillax and hang in the dirt,

He was so laissez faire,

Without so much as a care,

But everyone knew it was to cover butt hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a buffalo called Randy,

He had an obsession with candy,

His teeth they did rot,

He cared not one jot,

As he had many suckable sweets handy.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

There was a young girl called Estella

Whose searches ignored single fellas

So with her spare time

She started to rhyme

And they were quite cheesy, I tell ya

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a Weimaraner called Leigh,

Who sought accompaniment to her Chablis,

As a lover of cheese,

And no heart disease,

She had Stilton, mature Cheddar and Brie.

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

I once knew a girl called Estella

Who liked to sit on the face of a fella

But one day she forgot

He was still under her bot

And she let rip with a helluva smeller

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U so u so u so naughty

U so u so u so kinky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eat peach, pear or plum. Stick your finger up my bum.

See, it’s aleays the short and sweet poems that win.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I once knew a girl called Estella

Who liked to sit on the face of a fella

But one day she forgot

He was still under her bot

And she let rip with a helluva smeller"

I once knew a man, Moriarty

Invited ladies to the ‘in his pants’ party,

With snacks of chickpea,

Crisps and houmous, you see,

Because he liked his women farty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate writing poetry

Because I am shit

I'll leave it to Estella

And not be a tit

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

I once knew a girl Leviosa

She got on hot pics cos men chose her

But she got so crazy horny

Thinking wow they adore me

That with Ketamin they then had to dose her

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was an otter called John,

He often would break into song,

From falsetto to bass,

He did it all with good grace,

And everyone would all sing a long.

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By *hrobbermanMan
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

There was an old man from Dundee

Who got stung on the neck by a wasp

When asked if it hurt

He said "No. Not at all.

It can do it again if it likes."

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By *hrobbermanMan
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

Mary had a little pig

And it was always gruntin'

So she tied it to a five bar gate

And kicked its stupid head in.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There was a man who can’t rhyme,

His poems weren’t worth a dime,

He thought animal abuse,

In poems would amuse,

He’ll be hoping for a long time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was once a Frenchmen with a lovely beard

Some of the things he said were pretty weird

He said his cock wasn’t big but a grower

But all the ladies of Fab were hot for his leaf blower

Some tits rippled in the wind

Others blew off into the bin

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

There once was a guy called Gemini

Sucking willie's he wanted to try

So he gave one a suck

And enjoyed it mores the luck

Now he's changed his fab profile to bi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On the breast of a barmaid named Gail

Were tattooed the prices of ale

And on her behind

For the sake of the blind

Were the same but written in Braille "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a piglet called Bruce,

He had a feud with Charlotte, the goose,

Because she was a feminist,

She became his arch nemesis,

Through his education, they came to a truce.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The person below I want to fuck

It’s a gamble I know to trust my luck

I don’t want to look silly

So hope they haven’t got a willy

Or else it’s down on my knees for a suck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He held the burning Roman candle

(An outdoor firework without a handle)

It made him cough

Some bits flew off

And turned his shoe to a sandal

Sorry best I’ve got

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

There was a young lady estella

Who used to bladder the Stella

And When she was pissed ,

I'm goin she hissed

And went home and battered her fella

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a badger called Fred,

He was known to be exceptionally well read,

Original texts; translate,

Ethical questions; debate,

He was also outstanding in bed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a young turtle named Bob

Had the most fantastical knob

He could swim through the seas

With the greatest of ease

Even when he had a lazy lob

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

The problem with Mac

Isn’t the size of her ass

Or complete lack of class

It isn’t her skills in the sack

The problem is Mac

The silly Northern dear

Needs to log off from here

But betcha by golly she’ll be back

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a swinger named Gary,

Each woman online he would harry,

Textspeak ran amok

With a pic of his cock,

Then he'd flee, for a girl he had married.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a hippo named Mick,

He was feeling run down and so sick,

His GP drew blood,

And recommended the mud,

As it was clear he was anaemic.

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"The problem with Mac

Isn’t the size of her ass

Or complete lack of class

It isn’t her skills in the sack

The problem is Mac

The silly Northern dear

Needs to log off from here

But betcha by golly she’ll be back

There was a daft bird called Mac

She knew her willpower was kak

So she made Hanky log in

Change her password by crin!

But we know that one day she'll be back....

(assuming I can remember what I changed her password to....

erm....!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a man from Rhyl

Who swallowed a nuclear pill

His congenital organs were found in Glamorgan.

His balls up a tree in Brazil.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a mosquito called Kurt,

He was a most incorrigible flirt,

His word was worth nothing,

Hot air and chest puffing,

And he didn’t even care who he hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a crab called Shaun,

Treated everything with immense scorn,

Constantly scoffing,

Right into his coffin,

No one was glad he was born.

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

There once was a farmer called Jones

Who used to eat chicken bones

But now he is dead

Coz a hen pecked his head

And the townsfolk buried him with stones

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a koala named Doug,

He had a bright red coffee mug,

A penchant for latte,

The day after a party,

To be d*unk safe in bed and all snug.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jim, Erect Jim.

I'm rather partial to quim.

I have a license to poem.

But I'm often distracted by women.

And my tallywhacker growin'.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

There once was a girl named Estella

Who went to buy an umbrella

They'd all been sold

So she got wet and cold.

And had to snuggle up with a fella

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There once was a ferret called Phil,

Who fingered and fucked then fell ill,

Aphlegmed he flopped foul,

A last feral howl,

All cos he went bareback in Rhyl.

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By *ex_OnTheBeachCouple
over a year ago

kent ( by the seaside )

There is a naughty lady called Lucy

Whose kisses are oh so juicy

With a glint in her eye

She’ll pull you aside

And give you a jolly good spanking

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"There is a naughty lady called Lucy

Whose kisses are oh so juicy

With a glint in her eye

She’ll pull you aside

And what she does next only you'll see "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There once was a sperm whale called Nick,

Who felt awfully sea sick,

His mum was supercilious,

When Nick said he was bilious,

So he puked on her astoundingly quick.

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

There once was a nutter called Hanky

Who along with Mac made #TeamManky

We are a right pair

Who have had our fair share

Of arseholes and men who are lanky....

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Sex on the beach went to Nanking....

I don't know what to put next

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm a big fan a

The lovely Dana

2000

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"Sex on the beach went to Nanking....

I don't know what to put next"

Erm something about planking??!

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

I know a bird thought of a lary

To some she's decidedly scary

Despite having no tash

She is loud and is brash

It's only her chin that is hairy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/11/18 20:19:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There once was a bovine named Keith,

Who had such pearly white teeth,

He liked to show off his smile,

And pose next to a stile,

Till the girl cows all mooed “He’s prime beef”."

Oh no!... you changed your pic! Best one on fab that was!

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

Why am I on here I ask

Men are hard work and a task

I should head to the beach

With them all out of reach

With a picnic and a flask

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