FabSwingers.com forum: 10 things a lady should know

By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

As a tongue in check counterpart to the similar thread regarding men, i've pulled together 10 things ladies should know that i've come to the conclusion chatting with guys over the years. Gents, feel free to dispute, agree or comment

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

7- conscious, respectful guys have standards they don't lower and won't do anyone who is d*unk. Inconsiderate bastards will pull in anything they catch in their net and will capitalise on any opportunity to get laid, even ones where consent is dubious

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce

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By *r.BlondeMan
over a year ago

Chester/Wirral

"As a tongue in check counterpart to the similar thread regarding men, i've pulled together 10 things ladies should know that i've come to the conclusion chatting with guys over the years. Gents, feel free to dispute, agree or comment

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce"
11. We don't like spending all day shopping.

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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago

toy town

You've put a lot of thought into this

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"You've put a lot of thought into this

10 minutes worth!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce 11. We don't like spending all day shopping. "

Deffo 4, I made the mistake of messaging my fwb when United were playing! ??

"Baby, please! United???"

The offer of a blowjob whilst watching the match went down like a Nuns knickers in a cucumber field ??

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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago

toy town

"You've put a lot of thought into this

10 minutes worth!

They are accurate . I give you that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/10/18 18:09:30]

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

I've no interest in FFM at all.

I think spitting is hot, but its all down to how they do it, if they make a disgusted face then spit its a bit of a turn off but if they are smiling and spit it back onto your cock as they stroke up and down its good with me.

Stopped reading at point two but yeah.

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By *ugs and JunkCouple
over a year ago

Bellshill

I’m sure Mr would agree with 4,5,9 and 10

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Wow! You’ve been busy... and not working lol

It’s a great list but I think we knew most of that already

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

12. Toilet seats, we need it up you need it down. Get over it. We have.

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"12. Toilet seats, we need it up you need it down. Get over it. We have."

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By *agermeisterMan
over a year ago

Leeds

If he asks if you came and didn't the right answer is "No but I really enjoyed it"

If asked about cock size the correct answer is always "My God it's humongous!"

When asked about sexual performance the correct answer is "You were mind blowing, Tiger"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"12. Toilet seats, we need it up you need it down. Get over it. We have."

Just sit down and wee, end of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

That’s a 3 years supply for some of us!

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By *dward_TeagueMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

"12. Toilet seats, we need it up you need it down. Get over it. We have.

Just sit down and wee, end of

It’s so much easier standing up. As long as the seat is up and your aim is true!

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I didn't want to come off as greedy by putting every day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

That’s a 3 years supply for some of us!

Oh sorry about that then!

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I concur. I thought that was the 24 hourly quota.

C’mon chaps. I’m sick of all this ‘Woman! I’m not a machine’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 25/10/18 18:33:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I didn't want to come off as greedy by putting every day

I was more thinking multiple times a day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I concur. I thought that was the 24 hourly quota.

C’mon chaps. I’m sick of all this ‘Woman! I’m not a machine’ "

Haha they need to up their game!

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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago

toy town

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I concur. I thought that was the 24 hourly quota.

C’mon chaps. I’m sick of all this ‘Woman! I’m not a machine’

Haha they need to up their game!

I see what you did

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By *agermeisterMan
over a year ago

Leeds

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I didn't want to come off as greedy by putting every day

I was more thinking multiple times a day

Men have to preserve their Essential Jing. If not we end up looking like Dot Cotton

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I concur. I thought that was the 24 hourly quota.

C’mon chaps. I’m sick of all this ‘Woman! I’m not a machine’

Haha they need to up their game!

I see what you did

Who?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a well prepared list

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"That's a well prepared list

I take it we're in agreement?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

No mention of bacon though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"8 - only 3-5 a week, nah that’s not enough

I concur. I thought that was the 24 hourly quota.

C’mon chaps. I’m sick of all this ‘Woman! I’m not a machine’ "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Very good. Not as good as mine though

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce"

Damn!

I'm a fucking man! Who knew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

I take it we're in agreement?

Full agreement.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

No mention of bacon though."

If you don't already know the bacon rule then, it's just never got a work.

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce

Damn!

I'm a fucking man! Who knew

Sexiest looking guy i've ever seen!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex 3-5 times a week? Is that all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce

Damn!

I'm a fucking man! Who knew

Snap

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"Sex 3-5 times a week? Is that all? "

As stated, didn't want to come off as too greedy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha, so very true x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"12. Toilet seats, we need it up you need it down. Get over it. We have."

Hahaha love this one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

No mention of bacon though.

If you don't already know the bacon rule then, it's just never got a work. "

What is the bacon rule please?

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"That's a well prepared list

I take it we're in agreement?

Full agreement. "

Good man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls.

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls."

Isn't that a vast oversimplification?

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Very good chill my only gripe if you can call it that is 4 can be lost altogether unless petrol is involved and 8 needs upping a lot but you've explained your blag on that 1 so I reckon all good

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Very good chill my only gripe if you can call it that is 4 can be lost altogether unless petrol is involved and 8 needs upping a lot but you've explained your blag on that 1 so I reckon all good

Oh and 10 I thought was just me but obviously not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Very good chill my only gripe if you can call it that is 4 can be lost altogether unless petrol is involved and 8 needs upping a lot but you've explained your blag on that 1 so I reckon all good

Oh and 10 I thought was just me but obviously not."

Oi Oi behave yourself!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce"

4 5 6 8 9 apply rest not really at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls.

Isn't that a vast oversimplification?

Not judging by our last meet- we went for dinner then sex!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

No mention of bacon though.

If you don't already know the bacon rule then, it's just never got a work.

What is the bacon rule please?

Bacon makes Everything better!

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls.

Isn't that a vast oversimplification?

Not judging by our last meet- we went for dinner then sex!

If I recall, it was sex then dinner, followed by more sex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce"

Thanks for that..

But figuring out you men wasn't exactly rocket science to start with..

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

1 - if a guy states a ffm is not at the top of his sexual bucket list, he's probably lying.

2 - Most of us prefer you swallow rather than spit

3 - ask us what are favourite position is, odds are good "doggy" will be heard

4- guys that love sports will prefer to watch the big game rather than having sex. (Unless they're clever and ask for sex while watching or hearing the match

)

5- even the most respectful guys will at some point have engaged in "locker room talk" about women when we're with the boys

6- we need our male bonding time with our mates so we can act like arrested development teens and talk shit

8- sex 3-5x a week? Yes please!

9- every guy would appreciate being woken with a bj from time to time

10- many of us become allergic to commitment after a divorce

Thanks for that..

But figuring out you men wasn't exactly rocket science to start with..

We're so predictable it's boring

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls.

Isn't that a vast oversimplification?

You will have had more than your 3-5 by the end of this week! You’ve surpassed it already

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"There are two states of Man :

1] Hungry

2] Horny

Feed them - then empty their balls."

The perfect answer

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By *ueen of sleezeWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I would love to wake my man up with a BJ it would cause a right row lol

And sport I accept we lose where sport is concerned.

If my wanted sex 5 times a week i would think the aliens had swapped him lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's a well prepared list

No mention of bacon though.

If you don't already know the bacon rule then, it's just never got a work.

What is the bacon rule please?

Bacon makes Everything better!"

There it is, I knew I liked you

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By *hillout OP Man
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"I would love to wake my man up with a BJ it would cause a right row lol

And sport I accept we lose where sport is concerned.

If my wanted sex 5 times a week i would think the aliens had swapped him lol"

This chap needs a full course in sexual rehab

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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago

toy town

"I would love to wake my man up with a BJ it would cause a right row lol

And sport I accept we lose where sport is concerned.

If my wanted sex 5 times a week i would think the aliens had swapped him lol

This chap needs a full course in sexual rehab

Portuguese

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Ladies: You can't be a lady unless you stand up to fart, when your in the bath.

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By *arly StagesCouple
over a year ago

Penwortham

I'd agree with 5 through to 10, but for me; 1) guess as I've participated it's not on my bucket list but FFM wasn't as good as I anticipated. 2) I prefer to deposit on the boobs or face, I'm very visualy stimulated in that respect. 3) I prefer the pretzel as it offers more access to the key areas (especially if you prefer the larger lady). 4) Sport just doesn't float my boat any more, sex still does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doggy, nah. Rather see the mantlepiece as i am stoking that lovely warm fire, aaaaahh

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