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I love you....

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

If you had to look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I love you" could you do it convincingly, and if not why not?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, I could

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

To myself probably not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I'd never believe me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I could.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couldn't say it without laughing

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could make it look convincing, but it would be insincere.

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

Hell no. I’d be too busy laughing at the idea of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

God no not at all. X

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you."

Exactamondo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I'm a lying bastard...

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yeah, I could"

Good to hear x

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By *mber DextrousWoman
over a year ago

Devon

Right now, yes. I feel like I'm winning at life right now and love it.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"To myself probably not "

Why not, I wonder? x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you."

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No, I'd never believe me."

You should.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

No I don’t think I could. It would feel weird.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yes, I could."

Excellent

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

I couldn't convincingly say I love how I look but I do love who I am

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I couldn't say it without laughing"

Laughing is good x

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I could make it look convincing, but it would be insincere. "

Why, Mr B?

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

No .....I will never love myself ...

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Hell no. I’d be too busy laughing at the idea of it. "

Because it's a daft idea ?

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"God no not at all. X "

Gosh, why?x

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


" Right now, yes. I feel like I'm winning at life right now and love it."

Excellent x

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No. I'm a lying bastard..."

Ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I've never been one for looking in the mirror and I can't act for toffee.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day. "

You deserve to be loved. You are loveable. You are loved.

Same to everyone on this thread.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

No. I accept myself, I have compassion for myself, but I did way too many of those awful 90s forced self esteem things to come at love.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't love myself. I like myself.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No .....I will never love myself ... "

Really? Why? That sound kind of hard.

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By *riefcase_WankerMan
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

I used to be riddled with self-loathing, to the extent that I couldn't even handle someone else saying something nice to me (I would run away and start bawling my eyes out) let alone dream of saying something nice to myself.

But everyone seems to think I'm amazing except me, so gradually they've worn me down.

I guess I could probably give myself a "Meh, you're alright"

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull


"Hell no. I’d be too busy laughing at the idea of it.

Because it's a daft idea ?"

It would feel daft, yes. Standing in front of a mirror and saying anything to myself would make me feel daft though. I know it’s supposed to be good for you, like Gareth Cheeseman ‘ You are the best, you’re the best, you’re number 1, you’re a tiger roaaaaaar’ But I can’t do it with a straight face. It might be the Yorkshire in me.

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I could say I hate myself very easy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good god, no! Far too self aware.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No. I've never been one for looking in the mirror and I can't act for toffee."

I love mirrors, but I'd be a shit actor x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day.

You deserve to be loved. You are loveable. You are loved.

Same to everyone on this thread."

But not truly, as I don't love myself?

Sorry, I just hate that saying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't think I could

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day.

You deserve to be loved. You are loveable. You are loved.

Same to everyone on this thread.

But not truly, as I don't love myself?

Sorry, I just hate that saying. "

Yeah, I hate the idea that if you're not OK with who you are then others can't love you. It's an awfully vicious circle, particularly for those who struggle with depression.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No. I accept myself, I have compassion for myself, but I did way too many of those awful 90s forced self esteem things to come at love. "

Acceptance and compassion are good

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I used to be riddled with self-loathing, to the extent that I couldn't even handle someone else saying something nice to me (I would run away and start bawling my eyes out) let alone dream of saying something nice to myself.

But everyone seems to think I'm amazing except me, so gradually they've worn me down.

I guess I could probably give myself a "Meh, you're alright""

Yes you are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day. "

xxxxxxx

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you."

That's exactly what I was going to say

And the simplistic English word love has so many meanings

I indeed love myself as I love my mother or my sister

For me to be the best happiest and most functional human I need to love me first that ensures I don't neglect me which in turn means I don't neglect others and can indeed be strong enough to offer support

So yes j'madore xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No . Too much I dislike at the moment

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I don't love myself. I like myself."

Excellent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no i dont think i can.

i only have a small mirror and thats for shaving so i dont really look into one.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I could say I hate myself very easy. "

Why?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t look in the mirror unless I’m combing my hair. It don’t lie does it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I could.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you had to look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I love you" could you do it convincingly, and if not why not?

"

Good question and I'm surprised but yes I could.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I couldn't say it without laughing

Laughing is good x"

It's the best tonic in life isn't it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day.

You deserve to be loved. You are loveable. You are loved.

Same to everyone on this thread.

But not truly, as I don't love myself?

Sorry, I just hate that saying.

Yeah, I hate the idea that if you're not OK with who you are then others can't love you. It's an awfully vicious circle, particularly for those who struggle with depression. "

Exactly. I find it difficult to like myself most of the time but I know I have people who do love me. It's that love that keeps me going half the time.

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Yes

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By *riefcase_WankerMan
over a year ago

Milton Keynes


"I used to be riddled with self-loathing, to the extent that I couldn't even handle someone else saying something nice to me (I would run away and start bawling my eyes out) let alone dream of saying something nice to myself.

But everyone seems to think I'm amazing except me, so gradually they've worn me down.

I guess I could probably give myself a "Meh, you're alright"

Yes you are."

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

Makes me think of the scene in Home Alone 2 - I LOVE you..

Sorry, back on topic - I'm not sure I could but I'm working on it.

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I don't ever think I'll love myself, so no one will ever love me?

Today is a bad day.

You deserve to be loved. You are loveable. You are loved.

Same to everyone on this thread.

But not truly, as I don't love myself?

Sorry, I just hate that saying. "

No words, just a hug of support.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul"

Can I get an Amen up in here

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

That's exactly what I was going to say

And the simplistic English word love has so many meanings

I indeed love myself as I love my mother or my sister

For me to be the best happiest and most functional human I need to love me first that ensures I don't neglect me which in turn means I don't neglect others and can indeed be strong enough to offer support

So yes j'madore xxx "

Good to hear

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No . Too much I dislike at the moment "

Why?

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Can I get an Amen up in here "

Amen!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes easy i often do alan partrridges i am a tiger raaaaa raaaaaa raaaaaaa in the mirror

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul"

Because I actually care about other people. That's how I can love someone else and not myself. Because I don't love myself, I want to love someone else so much more.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"no i dont think i can.

i only have a small mirror and thats for shaving so i dont really look into one.

"

Ok

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I don’t look in the mirror unless I’m combing my hair. It don’t lie does it?"

Ok

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yes I could. "

Great x

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Because I actually care about other people. That's how I can love someone else and not myself. Because I don't love myself, I want to love someone else so much more. "

Ah. I just wanna give you a big massive Mac hug

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"If you had to look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I love you" could you do it convincingly, and if not why not?

Good question and I'm surprised but yes I could. "

That's great to hear

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Can I get an Amen up in here

Amen!"

Were you in the Midlands at anytime , I have no idea why I blocked you ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whats love got to do with it.

Whats love, but a second hand emotion

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yes"

Succinctly put. Good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Because I actually care about other people. That's how I can love someone else and not myself. Because I don't love myself, I want to love someone else so much more.

Ah. I just wanna give you a big massive Mac hug "

Sorry, its just one of those things that winds me up.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Makes me think of the scene in Home Alone 2 - I LOVE you..

Sorry, back on topic - I'm not sure I could but I'm working on it. "

It dies take work sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course I could. Have you seen me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think my love function has been disabled

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks


"I could say I hate myself very easy.

Why?"

Because of what I am. Because of what I have done.

The usual self loathing bollocks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No way lol .

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul"

RuRu the Guru

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"God no not at all. X

Gosh, why?x"

Because I don’t love myself, not sure I’m lovable x

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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago

Masked and Distant

Probably not, because I don't open up easily to being loved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No . Too much I dislike at the moment

Why?"

Just not where I want to be physically and don't like some of the things about myself but I'll get there again one day

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yes easy i often do alan partrridges i am a tiger raaaaa raaaaaa raaaaaaa in the mirror"

I can imagine, my feline friend.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"I could say I hate myself very easy.

Why?

Because of what I am. Because of what I have done.

The usual self loathing bollocks. "

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it "

Cheese can be good.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Whats love got to do with it.

Whats love, but a second hand emotion"

Thanks Tina x

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Of course I could. Have you seen me? "

Excellent

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Can I get an Amen up in here

Amen!

Were you in the Midlands at anytime , I have no idea why I blocked you ?"

Sorry I can’t help. I don’t know you and I’m not psychic. Not nice pointing out that you’ve blocked someone btw. Not good for the old ego

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By *rsSBWoman
over a year ago

toy town

It's so important to love oneself, and I am not talking as in wanking, I mean to tell yourself that you love yourself and that you are worthy of being loved.

Probably a bit too new age for some, but it works for me

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I think it’s ok to not love yourself. You just have to master the trick of living with yourself and it will all be ok.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I think my love function has been disabled "

As a survival tactic?

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I could say I hate myself very easy.

Why?

Because of what I am. Because of what I have done.

The usual self loathing bollocks. "

I'm sorry to hear that.it must be a horrible way to feel x

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No way lol ."

Yes way!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it

Cheese can be good."

Hey! You're talking to the Mills and Boon master

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Of course I could. Have you seen me?

Excellent"

lol. Gotta love yourself haven't you x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/10/18 21:29:35]

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"God no not at all. X

Gosh, why?x

Because I don’t love myself, not sure I’m lovable x "

You are loveable. You deserve to be loved.

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By *appytochatMan
over a year ago

Deep in the New Forest

I could but I'd be lying to myself.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Probably not, because I don't open up easily to being loved."

Ok,why do you think that might be?

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch


"Of course. One of the benefits of being a vain old cow.

If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else? - Tao of RuPaul

Can I get an Amen up in here

Amen!

Were you in the Midlands at anytime , I have no idea why I blocked you ?

Sorry I can’t help. I don’t know you and I’m not psychic. Not nice pointing out that you’ve blocked someone btw. Not good for the old ego "

Aw , I don't block anyone from forum , even brexit voters xxx but I do block profiles within 30 miles of me , if they are not interested ? Thus was curious if your profile had ever said it was within 30 miles

If not I also have no idea why you would be blocked? And I have over 4000 on my block list so can't find you to unblock lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think my love function has been disabled

As a survival tactic?"

Quite probably yes. X

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Not sure. "

Ok....

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"No . Too much I dislike at the moment

Why?

Just not where I want to be physically and don't like some of the things about myself but I'll get there again one day "

Yes you can and you will

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

Not a chance!

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"It's so important to love oneself, and I am not talking as in wanking, I mean to tell yourself that you love yourself and that you are worthy of being loved.

Probably a bit too new age for some, but it works for me "

It does work. Even if you don't believe it at first.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I think it’s ok to not love yourself. You just have to master the trick of living with yourself and it will all be ok. "

Accepting yourself, yes.

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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago

Masked and Distant


"Probably not, because I don't open up easily to being loved.

Ok,why do you think that might be?"

Think I was brought up not to show emotion too much.

However as I'm getting older I'm getting better (or worse). Now such a softy and blubber at the drop of a hat at sad films.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it

Cheese can be good.

Hey! You're talking to the Mills and Boon master "

Yes Dame Barbara

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I could but I'd be lying to myself. "

Why?

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I think my love function has been disabled

As a survival tactic?

Quite probably yes. X"

That's understandable x

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"It's so important to love oneself, and I am not talking as in wanking, I mean to tell yourself that you love yourself and that you are worthy of being loved.

Probably a bit too new age for some, but it works for me

It does work. Even if you don't believe it at first."

Unfortunately it doesn't work for everyone. I don't want to get too much into specifics, but this kind of thinking backfired on me for a long time, made the problem worse. I absolutely appreciate that you mean well, but there's no one right way about this stuff.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Yep.

The words "You're a dickhead but I love you and every now and then you make me proud" aren't too difficult right now.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Not a chance!"

Really why?

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Probably not, because I don't open up easily to being loved.

Ok,why do you think that might be?

Think I was brought up not to show emotion too much.

However as I'm getting older I'm getting better (or worse). Now such a softy and blubber at the drop of a hat at sad films."

You're allowed to cry, at sad films and life in general x

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you."

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it

Cheese can be good.

Hey! You're talking to the Mills and Boon master

Yes Dame Barbara"

I just tried "Hello Darling" and that seemed fine. Does that count?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Last time I looked in a mirror there was no reflection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable."

I love you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not right now

I have done

I will again

Just not right now

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"It's so important to love oneself, and I am not talking as in wanking, I mean to tell yourself that you love yourself and that you are worthy of being loved.

Probably a bit too new age for some, but it works for me

It does work. Even if you don't believe it at first.

Unfortunately it doesn't work for everyone. I don't want to get too much into specifics, but this kind of thinking backfired on me for a long time, made the problem worse. I absolutely appreciate that you mean well, but there's no one right way about this stuff. "

You are absolutely right, there's no one right way. You have to find what works for you.

But as someone who walked round with a sack of misery/loathing/guilt on her back for many many years,I do know what that feels like,and it doesn't half feel good if you can put it down and be kind to yourself.

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire


"Not a chance!

Really why?"

Because I don't love myself.

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By *eeBee67Man
over a year ago

Masked and Distant


"Probably not, because I don't open up easily to being loved.

Ok,why do you think that might be?

Think I was brought up not to show emotion too much.

However as I'm getting older I'm getting better (or worse). Now such a softy and blubber at the drop of a hat at sad films.

You're allowed to cry, at sad films and life in general x"

That's a good job as I'm a dab hand at both at the minute

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Yep.

The words "You're a dickhead but I love you and every now and then you make me proud" aren't too difficult right now."

Good to hear

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable."

I think my take on this would be...If you were building a house and you wanted it to stay standing you'd need strong foundations.

If you are building a loving, lasting relationship you need strong foundations too. If someone doesn't love themselves it weakens the foundations of that relationship.

It doesn't mean they can't be loved, but it does make it harder to stop those cracks in the foundations affecting the whole building.

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"CRINGE

It would just feel really cheesy. But I understand that that's a bad approach to the whole thing. So maybe I should try and get over it

Cheese can be good.

Hey! You're talking to the Mills and Boon master

Yes Dame Barbara

I just tried "Hello Darling" and that seemed fine. Does that count? "

For you, that's a win

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Last time I looked in a mirror there was no reflection "

Vampires deserve love too

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Not right now

I have done

I will again

Just not right now "

Ok,work in progress.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable.

I love you. "

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By *innie The Minx OP   Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"Not a chance!

Really why?

Because I don't love myself."

That's sad to hear x but ok to admit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable.

I think my take on this would be...If you were building a house and you wanted it to stay standing you'd need strong foundations.

If you are building a loving, lasting relationship you need strong foundations too. If someone doesn't love themselves it weakens the foundations of that relationship.

It doesn't mean they can't be loved, but it does make it harder to stop those cracks in the foundations affecting the whole building.

"

Agree with this. Like building on a fault line. Always potential for cracking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you had to look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I love you" could you do it convincingly, and if not why not?

"

I do it all the time anyway. I’m fucking amazing

I don’t btw. Just said for comedy effect.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"It's so important to love oneself, and I am not talking as in wanking, I mean to tell yourself that you love yourself and that you are worthy of being loved.

Probably a bit too new age for some, but it works for me

It does work. Even if you don't believe it at first.

Unfortunately it doesn't work for everyone. I don't want to get too much into specifics, but this kind of thinking backfired on me for a long time, made the problem worse. I absolutely appreciate that you mean well, but there's no one right way about this stuff.

You are absolutely right, there's no one right way. You have to find what works for you.

But as someone who walked round with a sack of misery/loathing/guilt on her back for many many years,I do know what that feels like,and it doesn't half feel good if you can put it down and be kind to yourself.

"

I know. I've walked a similar path. But the prescription of love, lest you be unlovable, did me harm. I found another way to a similar result.

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By *essiCouple
over a year ago

suffolk

Sometimes...

J

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By *ire_bladeMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Now yes I think I could but it's took some getting to.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you.

I disagree - we are at our best when we love the unlovable.

I think my take on this would be...If you were building a house and you wanted it to stay standing you'd need strong foundations.

If you are building a loving, lasting relationship you need strong foundations too. If someone doesn't love themselves it weakens the foundations of that relationship.

It doesn't mean they can't be loved, but it does make it harder to stop those cracks in the foundations affecting the whole building.

"

Sure. But nonetheless some people are healed by the love of another, and thereby learn to love themselves.

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By *nsatiable Needy BratWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

Yes I am very convincing, especially when I want to get into my knickers. Fall for it every time

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By *ficouldMan
over a year ago

a quandary, could you change my mind?


"If you had to look yourself in the eye in the mirror and say "I love you" could you do it convincingly, and if not why not?

You have to love yourself before anyone can truly love you."

Love myself, "no it would seem empty" I'd much rather love another with a hope they might love me back

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