FabSwingers.com forum: Drug use... a vent/rant.. whatever ..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Had one of those nights and got to vent...

Something i find really saddening & frustrating is many people attitudes towards those struggling with addiction & substance misuse.

Im 34 ive done ok in life career wise and have been surrounded by people in my game of work im in and also have myself dabbled in some party drugs, but fortunately left it at that, so i understand how addictive drugs are for many and how they oarnt for many others.

Now i take a night a week out my life to volunteer at a local charity that helps homeless, and behind id say 95% of those i see have a background or ongoing issue with substance missuse, its heart wrenching. Many use it as a getaway from a troubled life whether it be childhood abuse, debt or whatever, theres not one person i speak to that doesnt wish thier life had taken a different course, i dont think theres one night after working with these people i dont come home sit and shed tears after listening to them.

What really grinds my gears is people attitudes towards them. The term 'smack head' often used to describe them disgusts me. Please people look at these souls as people treat them with respect, you dont know their story or how theyve become who they are.

Sorry i just needed to write this im not begging for praise or asking for a debate i just needed to vent as im so frustrated with dimwitted neanderthal attitudes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's nice. I volunteer with amputees and handicapped.

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By *cousesubsallyWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere out there

"Had one of those nights and got to vent...

Something i find really saddening & frustrating is many people attitudes towards those struggling with addiction & substance misuse.

Sorry i just needed to write this im not begging for praise or asking for a debate i just needed to vent as im so frustrated with dimwitted neanderthal attitudes

. I work with people like this every day, reducing people to just their addictions doesn’t help the person, nor society as it doesn’t address the issues where they need to be - mental health, self-medicating etc. Everyone I have met has had a traumatic life or traumatic events, often from childhood and it’s the only life they know, living in the chaos...

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Had one of those nights and got to vent...

Something i find really saddening & frustrating is many people attitudes towards those struggling with addiction & substance misuse.

Sorry i just needed to write this im not begging for praise or asking for a debate i just needed to vent as im so frustrated with dimwitted neanderthal attitudes

It’s not a vent or a rant, I totally agree with you. Most with an addiction got into it due to a life changing event which then had consequences.... like any addiction, once you’re in it if it feels good most of the time why would you want to come out of it.... destructive as it is for those addicted it’s a safe haven, they don’t have to cope with normal life.

There is no where near enough help and support - you do a great job with your charity work.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't agree more. Unfortunately you will always get ass hats who think they are the big I am. I used to help out at a homeless charity on Saturday nights when I lived in the West Midlands, we would go out and deliver food and clothing parcels, but more importantly, we would offer conversation to those that were homeless. A lot of people I came across reached for drugs because of the situation they are in. To be honest if that's the only way they can get through the night I totally understand it and I'm generally anti drugs

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By *bi_AstrayTV/TS
over a year ago

Plymouth

It's usually the people who were fortunate enough to have a stable upbringing in life that have little understanding of what some of these people have been through. They simply have no concept of what has and does go on in dysfunctional homes.

There are similar comparisons of wealthy people having no empathy with poor people, They have no concept of being poor, fortunate enough to have been in well paid employment... The usual statement of they worked hard for everything they have, including their education... They didn't have to go to school on an empty stomach, or after being beaten and abused, or gone home to empty cupboard because all the money had been spent on drugs or alcohol. Quick to brand people as the dregs of society, slow or unwilling to understand the reasons why. Some pull through and lead a reasonable life, others fall into a cycle of self destruction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lost over ten years of my life to addiction. Truthfully I don't think I would change that as it taught me a hell of a lot about myself and life in general, but even so I feel incredibly lucky to have turned things around before I was reduced to homelessness and worse.

A massive part of turning things around was having people in my life who saw beyond the addiction and didn't judge me solely on that, for which I am eternally and deeply grateful.

There can never be too much compassion in the world imho, and the belief that people should just "harden up" is one of the things which is fundamentally wrong in this sick society.

Keep caring OP, the world desperately needs more people like you.

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By *iffaWoman
over a year ago

wherever

Did volunteer work a few years ago. My

Mentor gave me some advise, not all addicts are bad people but some bar people are addicts and addiction makes it hard to tell the difference

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By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

Gabor Mate has a lot of insight into addiction, abuse, trauma etc.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke

You say in your post that you're not asking for debate so I'll keep this short. I disagree with most of what you said and think that the quicker they hit rock bottom, the better it is for everyone as that's when people who are going to change, do so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn't agree more. Long story but cut it short tonight a young lady me and my sin k we years ago bumped into me and told me everything. I'd substance abuse suicide attempt. Stint in the local mentle hospital and l9ts more...she is looking good and happy and in a halfway house now awating a flat. God bless her. I'm rounding some friends up to help her furnish her flat and she messaged me a lovely txt tonight.my heart nearly burst open.

She isn't a victim anymore. She is a surviver and a warrior and I couldn't be more prouder of her.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

Well to buck the trend I don’t agree and I’m someone that came through a pretty horrific ordeal spanning over several years in childhood, by the hands of a substance abuser, it’s left scars, but I never turned to filling my system with shite to make things “better”, I fought to make them better, I refused to turn myself into a vile waste of space like him.

People that take the easy way out are nothing to be admired

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By *laytimenowMan
over a year ago

Essex

People who take the easy way out are in the ground very early after discovering there problem.

People who then turn to "other things" are normally pretty desperate to make good, but while they are in the currentness of the situation the addiction stops the sh*t in there head.

Very few people i know who have used heavily have done it purely because they thought it was a good idea .

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Theres usually always something thats happened in their lives to make the turn to drink or drugs.

My sister died very young of alcoholic liver disease and it was heartbreaking.

I don't think many just decide to choose that sort of life and bad things can happen to any of us in life .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People who take the easy way out are in the ground very early after discovering there problem.

People who then turn to "other things" are normally pretty desperate to make good, but while they are in the currentness of the situation the addiction stops the sh*t in there head.

Very few people i know who have used heavily have done it purely because they thought it was a good idea ."

That's how it started for my brother and his girlfriend but it very quickly spiralled into something that took over their lives.. his girlfriend paid the ultimate price and died of a brain aenurism whilst trying to get into shape for rehab...

My brother endures the living nightmare of both alcohol and drug addiction and has pancreatitis..he has finally accepted that it was nobodies fault but his that he got into it all in the first place, after years of blaming others for his bad choices

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have.

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By *horecruxCouple
over a year ago

SE4

It's hard to see a soul when they burgle old people, beat them or mug them, I know collectively they are not all to blame but, they endorse each other go in and out of prison "parcelled" up feeding and supplying one another with a drug that they knew wrecked lives before they started none of them stay clean and are a drain on resources.

If I had my way I'd bring back lobotomy and leave them on the same park bench they were found on

Morning ! X

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke

"Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have. "

Judgmental, yes. Ignorant, no.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have. "
.

You’ll find most with the “judge mental” attitudes are the ones that have watched people they love destroy themselves and people around them for their fix whilst blaming those people for their poor choices

So you might want to work on your own jusgemental attitude before crirising others on theirs

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By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

I've been 'raised' by an abusive alcoholic, got into shitty relationships with them too. Realised you have to leave people to do the lame shit they need to do and only try to help if they ask for it (and are genuine about wanting to sort themselves out). You definitely don't have to try and empathise or sympathise with them at all.

My sister is a drug abuser, love her loads and hope she doesn't accidently kill herself. Lost my cousin to a heroin OD, she'd do anything for anybody except herself. Both are/were nice people fundamentally.

I genuinely believe that all drug abusers are in pain and that's why they take the drugs, but you've got to realise that the drugs do affect the brain. Their need for drugs can make them horrible people (addicts are called users for a reason), the reason why they are taking drugs might also have already have turned them into someone you wouldn't like.

So long as you also realise that you need to leave people to do the shit they need to do. You can't save everybody and all drug addicts shouldn't be classed as bad by default. But i think it's admirable that people are there to support addicts when they want to change and need help doing so.

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

"Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have. .

So you might want to work on your own jusgemental attitude before crirising others on theirs "

No, I'm good thanks. I'm happy with supporting people who try to help addicts, rather than those who see them as subhuman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The first time a dabbled in drugs was in the back of my sisters car.

Must have been good stuff because I don't even have a sister.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

"Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have. .

So you might want to work on your own jusgemental attitude before crirising others on theirs

No, I'm good thanks. I'm happy with supporting people who try to help addicts, rather than those who see them as subhuman. "

Do you attempt to help addicts yourself? or just just enjoy the view from your pedestal?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for what you do, OP. Sounds brilliant, and totally with you on the ignorant and judgmental attitudes some people have. .

So you might want to work on your own jusgemental attitude before crirising others on theirs

No, I'm good thanks. I'm happy with supporting people who try to help addicts, rather than those who see them as subhuman.

Do you attempt to help addicts yourself? or just just enjoy the view from your pedestal?"

The pedestal is a nice view, and we have jaffa cakes....and funnily enough, cocaine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For a couple of years from about age 20-26 I did cocaine up to 3 or 4 night's per week.

The first time I tried it I was d*unk. Must other times from then on were after drinking.

So I quit going out. I had to move away to distract myself and abstain for years before now I can finally face people doing cocaine and I don't feel urged to join in.

In Asia I was having anxiety problems. So I took benzodiazepines. Then later I just wanted my life to end so I started taking morphine injections.

My parents could see that I had undiagnosed mental health problems so they convinced me to come back home and get treatment.

That was a few years ago but I'm alot better now and haven't done /morphine/benzos in years.

I think having unknown issues in my brain and the confusion I had made me want to do drugs to block it out.

But after I was diagnosed I learned better ways to cope. I still smoke abit of but I don't drink or do or opiates. I don't feel tempted when I see other people doing drugs.

Cocaine gives me flashbacks to a bad time in my life and the struggle I had not being able to go out socially because I couldn't trust myself..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am sceptical of drug addicts.

Being a former user I don't trust them. I've been in their company alot and they have a tendency to be scumbags.

I admire people helping them through charity work. But if it's your friend or partner you should avoid them or set extreamly firm boundries because they are likely to be criminals.

Smoking isn't the same.

Alcohol and cocaine are as bad as eachother.

^^^I rarely drink alcohol.

I probably prefered cocaine a few years ago because it stopped me feeling sick after I drank too much.

Alcohol is a bad drug and both my grandads got cancer in their throats.

Alcohol users criticising drug users is pot vs kettle

I smoke and I know it's relivant to my neurological condition. If you have high functioning autism you (anxiety/panic attack/stim/insomnia/mealtdowns)....Smoking cannabis reduces this. I was prescribed benzodiazipine but cannabis has more positive results and less side effects.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I think there's a tendency for many people to let themselves be incredibly lazy - they refuse to invest much time or energy (usually investing none whatsoever), in thinking things through. They'll often let this laziness be coupled with allowing themselves to feel good, at the expense of others. They'll put people down, whilst stealing an ego boost, perceiving themselves as superior.

This might be a little easier to understand, if the situations and people that they put down/write off, were incredibly complex - on a par with understanding dark matter etc. But it's not particularly that hard to grasp things the way the op has outlined.

Homelessness is very frequently connected with mental health issues too - alongside an almost insignificant investment into provision of services that support mental health care.

The people who write others off so readily would benefit from investing their time in helping to support others. Ignorance would diminish as an excuse - though they may still sustain incredible laziness.

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