FabSwingers.com forum: Tips for managing a home

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As someone who split from a long term relationship late last year, and is now running around being a full time single dad, I've been chucked in the deep end somewhat with running a happy home.

What tips would you give someone to help them keep on top of things?

For example I have a friend who does a massive cook up at the beginning of the week, then boxes and freezes most of it for reheating throughout the week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Budget & plan

I know my budget 6 months in advance

It's all on a spreadsheet

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

A decent calendar mate.

Write it all down a month in advance so hopefully you will never forget a lesson prep or pick up time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take money out every week for food, petrol etc

When it's gone, it's gone

If I nip to the shops and use my card, I always overspend by the end of the week

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Always go through your childs school bag and dont rely on them to give you notes on fancy dress day. Bake a cake day or whatever other day it is that week

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By *ove3funCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

When the school send the non-uniform/assembly/term dates through add them to your phone calendar with reminders the day before

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Get all the school uniform ready for the week on a Sunday.

Make the school lunches the night before.

Do a menu for the week and shop for what you need.

Use a diary for everything!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a board in your kitchen with a calendar (one with a square for every day) and a place to either write notes or pin them.

Soon as kids come home from school go through their bag for school trip letters or important days etc and write them on the calendar.

Anything that needs signing for or paying do right away and put back in the school bag before they leave for school the next day.

Keep school shoes polished- they last longer.

If you are informed of swimming lessons in the next term go out right away and buy trunks/costume and swimming hat and put them in a bag.

Check for homework every night and have your own schedule on the fridge.

Play with them as much as possible-they grow up very quickly and don't want to be around you much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Teach the children to put their stuff away and help with the housework.

Have a menu for the week that fits in with your time table.

Quick meals for days they have after school clubs for instance.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

All of the above . You'll soon get into a routine...

And ..

don't forget to make a bit of time for yourself.

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By *tonmessyMan
over a year ago

Bournemouth

Was put in a similar situation... top things that helped me were investing in a good cordless dyson and use wet wipes to dust with! Random I know but it made a difference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you have a babysitter? Arrange night outs for yourself so you always have something to look forward to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you looked at

gingerbread.org.uk ?

I realise that as a single parent you are probably already aware of this organisation.

Good luck. It can't be easy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"As someone who split from a long term relationship late last year, and is now running around being a full time single dad, I've been chucked in the deep end somewhat with running a happy home.

What tips would you give someone to help them keep on top of things?

For example I have a friend who does a massive cook up at the beginning of the week, then boxes and freezes most of it for reheating throughout the week "

Find another woman sharpish mate !

Way too much hassle for you to have to cope with ......

You know this is the only sensible option don’t you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't expect too much of yourself, if you listen to most parents they are running themselves ragged trying to provide and show the life they THINK everyone else has.

I've decided if the kids survive with all their limbs intact and I'm not sat in the corner rocking, the day has been a success and unless you have serious allergies a bit of dust doesn't hurt anyone

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

Deal with every piece of paper that crosses your threshold on that day, don't put it on the side to do later. If its school stuff, sign, attach money, get it back in their bag. Set calender alarms on your phone for the week before and day before non uniform, fancy dress, sports days, assembly's etc.

Deal with post the same way... Bin the junk mail, shred anything you don't need and file away in the correct place anything you need to keep.

Do birthday and anniversary cards for friends and family between Christmas and New year... Clip them to the calender where they need posting

Take out the cash you need for the month for shopping, petrol, school dinners etc and stick to it.

Make kids dental appointments for school holidays as you leave the dentist from the last one. School holiday appointments are near impossible to get nearer the time.

Make time for yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being a single parent is hard.

YOU are doing fine. Keep up the good work

Mistress Amelia

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Get your grocery shopping delivered in fact get everything possible delivered.

Don't iron anything.

Nothing wrong with frozen veg.

Nothing wrong with beans on toast with an egg for dinner.

Buy a bulk load of socks all the same colour.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wow! So much good advice. Thanks guys. I haven't read it yet, running around trying to get my little one to bed, but will read through a bit later

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Spend time playing with your children and make memories with them.

Tidying up make it a game.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give them your time, but remember you need your own time as well.

Easy to say but hard to do.

I like to get up before my daughter does, that way I have a few minutes for myself in the morning with a cuppa before the mayhem starts.

If people want to help, let them! Be gracious, be grateful and have fun.

Yes being a single parent is hard work, but we get all the love as well x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wow! So much good advice. Thanks guys. I haven't read it yet, running around trying to get my little one to bed, but will read through a bit later

Having a good bedtime routine helps as well!

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Tip my hat to you for taking on all that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't stress about the small stuff a mucky kid is a happy kid soon bung them in the bath at the end of the day get out as much as possible check out local clubs mix with other parents depending on how old they are and good luck x

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Get a Swedish au pair

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me personally, I finish work at 1pm for 4 out of the five week days, when I pull up on my drive I'll sit and fuck about on my phone for 10 mins or have a drink in the car and as soon as I walk through the door I won't sit down. I'll Hoover and tidy up from the morning mess, put a load in the machine or have a bath and wash dry and straighten my hair and try and get as much done in the two hours before school home time because my daughter does a class every day of the week after school. Bedding is done every Sunday but my main clean of the house where shits pulled out and hoovered behind and bleached is once a fortnight when my daughter is with her father for the weekend.

Uniforms always washed on Fridays and ironed and put away straight away.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Persuade them that your wifi hub is intelligent and only works if they do jobs around the house to help out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Get a Swedish au pair

Oi Oi now you're talking

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Persuade them that your wifi hub is intelligent and only works if they do jobs around the house to help out.

Haha I'll keep that one up my sleeve for when he's a bit older

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"Persuade them that your wifi hub is intelligent and only works if they do jobs around the house to help out.

Haha I'll keep that one up my sleeve for when he's a bit older

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

When I was newly single and my children were young teatime onwards were always busy. I quickly realised they didn't need a bath every night,it meant we made more reading time together before bed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Some great tips here... And really some inspiring people running around making it happen.

I loved the idea of making a menu for the week. You could also incorporate cold stuff like rice from the night before. And I liked the reminder that maybe one day a week beans on toast is enough

I've given up on the idea of being a perfect dad. I'm just going to be the best I can. Until I'm more fluent in all this after school clubs should help give me more time. But you're all right... I should make sure I don't miss out on playing with my little boy while I can. Thanks xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust."

Or teach the kids to dust

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust.

Or teach the kids to dust "

Or make a furry onesie and let him crawl all over the house for a few minutes

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust.

Or teach the kids to dust

Or make a furry onesie and let him crawl all over the house for a few minutes

They are a thing.

You can get babygros with mop attachments on the knees.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust.

Or teach the kids to dust "

Then they will be busy when you want to play with them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Don't stress about dust and mess. I'd rather spend time with my children than dusting a never-ending pile of dust.

Or teach the kids to dust

Or make a furry onesie and let him crawl all over the house for a few minutes

They are a thing.

You can get babygros with mop attachments on the knees."

Noooooooooooooo

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By *rank n BettyCouple
over a year ago

Not meeting

All of the above!!

Let them help you prepare food, plan meals, sort washing/pair socks (as already said buy plain in bulk) etc.... also good skills for when they are older but sneaking in extra time together. Stick music on & have a kitchen party.

If they get a hot meal at lunchtime then a sandwich will be enough for the evening if short on time.

Bathing every day isn’t good for your skin but I used to clean bath, put child in bath & clean rest of bathroom - again extra time together.

Good luck - it does get easier in time

B x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A slow cooker is a fantastic piece of kit in the winter. Make enough in it for two days. Have casserole one day, make a pie with ready made pastry the next.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A slow cooker is a fantastic piece of kit in the winter. Make enough in it for two days. Have casserole one day, make a pie with ready made pastry the next.

Oh that's interesting. I'll have a look into that. I'm tempted to get a bread maker as it's really so easy and there's nothing quite like freshly made bread

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By *aeganaWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Dont forget duvet days there always great entertainment with the kids my daughter loves it when we get the duvets out in the living room and spend the day in our pjs watching movies cuddled up with sandwiches and so on for tea. Sometimes less is best.

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

You havent been chucked into the deep end you choose that route yourself

Making a meal at beginning of week is the lazy way and not everyone wants the same meal daily

Mix your meals cook daily wash up daily or in morning

Drop children at school take a ride out goto town or market

Kids had ds to play while I cooked tea kept them interested in something tv was theres net was mine gives a way out of 4 walls at night

Price of pictures vs the internet , internet was cheaper still is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try and talk and listen to them and not shout although thats hard when they won't get ready and your stressed out. But mostly I would say make sure you all laugh together and make time for fun too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You havent been chucked into the deep end you choose that route yourself"

I know you mean well dude, and thanks for the other advice, but you don't know my story. Take it from me... I've been chucked in the deep end

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"You havent been chucked into the deep end you choose that route yourself

I know you mean well dude, and thanks for the other advice, but you don't know my story. Take it from me... I've been chucked in the deep end

When did you take the plunge?

was it recently?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make sure your living room and kitchen is clean and tidy before you go to bed. Before you leave for work tidy the rooms..Make the beds..washing downstairs and tidy the bathrooms

Plan your meals in a couple of days in advance

Get an organiser and write down gym/club days/appointments

Always iron the night before...never in the morning

Check school bags for letters

Every day spend 10 mins extra on one room in the house doing windows and behind the couch/cleaning lamps etc

Most importantly enjoy the wee one x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"All of the above!!

If they get a hot meal at lunchtime then a sandwich will be enough for the evening if short on time.

Bathing every day isn’t good for your skin but I used to clean bath, put child in bath & clean rest of bathroom - again extra time together.

Good luck - it does get easier in time

B x"

My kids would not have been happy with a sandwich for dinner, even if they had a hot lunch.

Some meals-like pasta or something on toast-are quick to make, and a small salad doesn't take long to prepare to go with pasta or pizza.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Plan and budget everything a year in front. Know when renewals are due for your.essentials, allowing you time to research and select appropriate replacements. Managing your budget gives you ability to relax more and know you're in control.

Create routines, as habits are great to have and give comfort to others.

Plan in time for you and your wellbeing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wing it

it’s how I do everything in life, life’s to short to stress that you didn’t hoover today or pick the toys up etc as long as your child is clean, fed and happy everything else can wait

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Enjoy the challenges that come with it. You'll fly through them.

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

"You havent been chucked into the deep end you choose that route yourself

I know you mean well dude, and thanks for the other advice, but you don't know my story. Take it from me... I've been chucked in the deep end

Ive got 2 children left behind by there mother at age 3 and 1 I choose to look after them.

As much as I choose to quit work to look after them

Yet my son is my step child both are now 17 and 19

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

- Clothes don’t need washing after being worn once (pants and socks ab exception).

- odd socks are fine

- don’t iron anything, just fold/hang.

- hot meals every evening are just not necessary

- get the schoop app (school updates)

- keep on top of mess, the cleaning becomes easier.

- invest in shelves and baskets to store mess

- ignore perceived perfection in others, they obviously have help/pay someone

- pay someone to do as much stuff as possible/affordable

- accept all offers of help

- ask for help

- dishwasher

- it’s all about your time. Use it wisely and you will be present in your sons life and that is far more important than clean pants and ironed shirts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv bin a single dad for 7 years now mate fare play to you doing a good job just keep doing what your doing and show kids love thats one thing kids need love and happiness x fare play bro

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By *eonnieCouple
over a year ago

Worsley

"A slow cooker is a fantastic piece of kit in the winter. Make enough in it for two days. Have casserole one day, make a pie with ready made pastry the next.

Oh that's interesting. I'll have a look into that. I'm tempted to get a bread maker as it's really so easy and there's nothing quite like freshly made bread "

I have a bread maker and it really is straight forward! You just weigh the ingredients and chuck them in the bread maker in the order the booklet suggests. And you can make simple cakes with it too

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By *oncupiscentTonyMan
over a year ago

Kent

Nobody really moves furniture when they're doing the monthly vacuuming do they?

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