FabSwingers.com forum: Tight Trousers And Itchy Balls...

By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

You know the scene right? You’re in a public place (Asda earlier for me) wearing tight trousers, when you suddenly develop the mother of all scrotum itches!

You can’t exactly scratch it openly (given the surroundings) so you try to perform the tried and tested ‘Slip a hand in the pocket and scratch the offending bollocks from the side.’ technique....

Alas! Christ on a pogo-stick! - The trouser pocket is too bloody tight to get your hand in!!!

Panic suddenly sets in; Chaps, what the hell do you do?!

As this is the age of equality, ladies, please feel free to join in also with your very own, ‘Itchy Southern Hemisphere Whilst Out In Public’ tales of woe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rub it against the trolley.

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Rub it against the trolley."

A good technique indeed sir; The only downside of course, is the very real possibility of a trolly administered, static electric shock although even then, it must be surely be better than the excruciating agony of an itchy ball bag...

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

I recently had a piercing downstairs. It itched so much I almost cried but after bonkers advice from my piercer I haven’t had the issue since. I can’t disclose it because it’s ridiculous but don’t dance the itchy groin dance and don’t scratch it in public.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

Now you have just made me laugh

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"I recently had a piercing downstairs. It itched so much I almost cried but after bonkers advice from my piercer I haven’t had the issue since. I can’t disclose it because it’s ridiculous but don’t dance the itchy groin dance and don’t scratch it in public. "

Trade secrets eh?

I tried the old Kegel like, ‘clinch’ technique which sometimes provides a semblance of relief but alas, not on this occasion. In truth I managed to waddle off to the pets aisle and gave it a not so subtle scratch there and then as no one is usually ever there (and luckily easn’t today either)

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Now you have just made me laugh

......Has said laughter instigated any impromptu itching, um....’downstairs’?

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By *alking HeadMan
over a year ago

Bolton

I saw a gorgeous girl at about 7am this morning. I was driving past her as she stood at the bus stop and she must have got a sudden attack of "hungry arse".

As the streets were deserted she obviously thought it was safe to try to extract her undies from her bum by attempting to pinch the material of her almost sprayed on jeans whilst doing a little jig. It put a smile on my face anyway, and took my mind off my impending interview for a minute.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Buy trousers that fit properly?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need a false arm so you can have one hand down your trousers just incase of such an emergency

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just shamelessly scratch the itch, you wouldn't even notice if someone scratched an itch on their arm, if you don't like it don't look

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The things we do for the 'London look'

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