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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? " What is your problem? | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? " So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? | |||
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"Yes I have. I need to cut my toe nails but I am not flexible enough. Can you do it with your lively teeth ?" Can I suck them to soften them? Do you need me to nibble the skin around them too? | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? Cough but if your breath smells bad... The combination of smells might kill you both. " Maybe I'll poo outside and blame the cows? #smellofthecountry | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " Layer the bottom of the pan with toilet roll, so you don’t get a splash. If you think you’re going to fart when you poo, flush the toilet or have a coughing fit. Good luck in your pooing endeavours X | |||
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"Yup. I'm stuck on an island,it's 11.30 am it's 27 degrees and the only thing I can do about it is go swim in a glacial lake.. Damn it will be the death of me " Maybe just dip one leg in? | |||
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"Yes I have. I need to cut my toe nails but I am not flexible enough. Can you do it with your lively teeth ? Can I suck them to soften them? Do you need me to nibble the skin around them too? " Please do ! Thank you so much. It hurts when I feest fannies | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " Run both sink taps and bath taps at full flow and sing at the top of your voice | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " Place a finger in each ear,then start humming. If you can't hear it, it never happened | |||
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"Yup. I'm stuck on an island,it's 11.30 am it's 27 degrees and the only thing I can do about it is go swim in a glacial lake.. Damn it will be the death of me Maybe just dip one leg in?" Errrrgh, toe dipping... Cannnnnnonballlll | |||
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"What’s the best way to get rid of a cold? I’m currently medicating with gin " You need a hot toddy | |||
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"I hate shaving my balls.. can you do it for me? " Can I wax them? | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? Run both sink taps and bath taps at full flow and sing at the top of your voice " It's a hut..I'm not sure there is a toilet | |||
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"I hate shaving my balls.. can you do it for me? Can I wax them?" Deal. When shall I come? | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help." | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. Why comment then " Oh shut up. | |||
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"I hate shaving my balls.. can you do it for me? Can I wax them? Deal. When shall I come? " I don't think you will | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. Why comment then " Don't be mean | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. " Are you a medical person with knowledge of hysterectomies,please say you are? I feel kinda plop. | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. Are you a medical person with knowledge of hysterectomies,please say you are? I feel kinda plop." No, but I have some friends who might be able to help. | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. Are you a medical person with knowledge of hysterectomies,please say you are? I feel kinda plop. No, but I have some friends who might be able to help." I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? Run both sink taps and bath taps at full flow and sing at the top of your voice It's a hut..I'm not sure there is a toilet " A bucket out the back? watch out for nettles | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? Run both sink taps and bath taps at full flow and sing at the top of your voice It's a hut..I'm not sure there is a toilet A bucket out the back? watch out for nettles " Oh nettle fanny rash | |||
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"I hate shaving my balls.. can you do it for me? Can I wax them? Deal. When shall I come? I don't think you will " Tempt me | |||
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"Can you massage my back I've a trapped nerve. " Yes | |||
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"Can you massage my back I've a trapped nerve. " I can get on your nerve or touch your nerve if this helps | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " Sing really badly and he’ll put the pillow over his head to block it out You’re welcome | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " Start a mature conversation about how refreshing it is to be with an adult who isn't easily shocked. Then when you've got them nodding their head announce "my! that reminds me! my gut's rumbling. I really need to nudge a turd out. you don't mind do you?" Problem solved. Thank me later | |||
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"Can you massage my back I've a trapped nerve. Yes " Thank you. | |||
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"Can you massage my back I've a trapped nerve. I can get on your nerve or touch your nerve if this helps " You can apply pressure to my nerve it will help however you don't get on my nerves... Keep trying | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? " I have a problem with the shit topics on the forums | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? " I usually time the flush so it makes noise at the exact same time the poo plops into the water...Don't drink alcohol or eat rich foods the night before, you don't want to stink the place out. A little smell is OK. We all poo ffs. Have a great time x | |||
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"what shirt colour should i wear for a date tomorrow? Normally go for blue but cant decide! " Step away from the blue | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? I have a problem with the shit topics on the forums " Me too. What shall we do? | |||
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"I can’t seem to find the end of the sellotape.... Can you help me.... ?? " No. Fuck no | |||
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"I have a big problem. She's about 15 years older than me and very dull " She'll die soon. | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? What is your problem? So I'm staying with someone at the weekend...but its a small confined space (not a prison cell) What happens when I need to *whipsers* poo? I usually time the flush so it makes noise at the exact same time the poo plops into the water...Don't drink alcohol or eat rich foods the night before, you don't want to stink the place out. A little smell is OK. We all poo ffs. Have a great time x" I don't poo...I haven't even farted yet. 7 months I'm doing well. | |||
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"Can you babysit for me some night so I can have a very sexy friend over sooner rather than later?? " Yeah I can babysit. When do you need me? | |||
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"My cock's too big and my tits are too small, Can you help?" If you rub your cock enough it'll break down the fat, you need to push that up your body and into your tits. My tits seem to have fallen into my thighs. If I stand on my head for a week it'll go back. | |||
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"I'm drowning in HR emails and red tape.... Please can you help? " Shred the fucking lot | |||
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"Yes I have. I need to cut my toe nails but I am not flexible enough. Can you do it with your lively teeth ?" Buy yourself some sandalboots | |||
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"I'm drowning in HR emails and red tape.... Please can you help? Shred the fucking lot" Thanks... I think | |||
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"I have no fig rolls " Ruggers! Need me to deliver some? | |||
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"Yes I have. I need to cut my toe nails but I am not flexible enough. Can you do it with your lively teeth ? Can I suck them to soften them? Do you need me to nibble the skin around them too? " Lunch mmm mm | |||
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"I have no fig rolls Ruggers! Need me to deliver some? " Thought you would never ask...I like the Morrisons ones the best please | |||
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"I have no fig rolls Ruggers! Need me to deliver some? Thought you would never ask...I like the Morrisons ones the best please" Okay I'll be there soon with a biscuit bundle x | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? " I do. You can't help me. Can I help you? | |||
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"Get some VIP poo...can't vouch personally but it is supposed to work! " Fuck that expensive stuff. I'll use lynx Africa | |||
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"Blame the dog. There's no dog. Ok, put me on loud speaker and I'll pretend it's me and take the blame " We were just talking about you. Ill call you while I poo for a change | |||
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"Get some VIP poo...can't vouch personally but it is supposed to work! Fuck that expensive stuff. I'll use lynx Africa " Java baby, java | |||
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"Need 2 tyres fitted on my bike if you would be so kind Oh and there is a few things that need to be washed up" Got spoons? | |||
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"The string on my tea bag fell into the water..... Can you help.... ?? " The string fell off my tampon... can you help? | |||
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"Can I help? Maybe you can help me? I do. You can't help me. Can I help you? " Maybe you can...who knows? | |||
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"Blame the dog. There's no dog. Ok, put me on loud speaker and I'll pretend it's me and take the blame We were just talking about you. Ill call you while I poo for a change " Call? Whilst dropping the kids off at the pool? Groooooossssss. What can I say, it's the only time I'm not distracted by shiny things | |||
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"immodium will stop the urge to (whispers) poo......" Wonder if he likes a boston pancake? | |||
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"I need to update my bathroom and downstairs toilet. I really havent the time or motivation to do it myself. I need help xx " Can i poo in it? | |||
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"Get some VIP poo...can't vouch personally but it is supposed to work! Fuck that expensive stuff. I'll use lynx Africa Java baby, java " Lavendar talc...like old times | |||
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"Blame the dog. There's no dog. Ok, put me on loud speaker and I'll pretend it's me and take the blame We were just talking about you. Ill call you while I poo for a change Call? Whilst dropping the kids off at the pool? Groooooossssss. What can I say, it's the only time I'm not distracted by shiny things " It's my best shopping time. | |||
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"Need 2 tyres fitted on my bike if you would be so kind Oh and there is a few things that need to be washed up Got spoons?" would need to be big spoons its a 600cc | |||
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"Yes my internet is going really slow, I've got 300plus unread messages and a whole load of veries to write...argh. It's like an anxiety homework dream. And relax." Let me log into your account and do some admin. | |||
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"Need 2 tyres fitted on my bike if you would be so kind Oh and there is a few things that need to be washed up Got spoons? would need to be big spoons its a 600cc " Come back when you have a mens bike | |||
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"The string on my tea bag fell into the water..... Can you help.... ?? The string fell off my tampon... can you help?" I’ve got a pair of mole grips you can borrow...... | |||
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"I need to update my bathroom and downstairs toilet. I really havent the time or motivation to do it myself. I need help xx Can i poo in it? " Of course you can, once its completed | |||
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"The string on my tea bag fell into the water..... Can you help.... ?? The string fell off my tampon... can you help? I’ve got a pair of mole grips you can borrow...... " | |||
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"I do,but I don't think you can help. Are you a medical person with knowledge of hysterectomies,please say you are? I feel kinda plop. No, but I have some friends who might be able to help. I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital." I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. | |||
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"Yes my internet is going really slow, I've got 300plus unread messages and a whole load of veries to write...argh. It's like an anxiety homework dream. And relax. Let me log into your account and do some admin. " I've always wanted a PA, would you sit in my knee and call me sir? | |||
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"Yes my internet is going really slow, I've got 300plus unread messages and a whole load of veries to write...argh. It's like an anxiety homework dream. And relax. Let me log into your account and do some admin. I've always wanted a PA, would you sit in my knee and call me sir?" If you like sir | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg." I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" " That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky " I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice | |||
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"Need 2 tyres fitted on my bike if you would be so kind Oh and there is a few things that need to be washed up Got spoons? would need to be big spoons its a 600cc Come back when you have a mens bike " Define mans bike lol would a 170 mph gsxr do it | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice " Ha! Have it, it's yours! The line, not my voice...it might take an erotic poem to make my voice say yes | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice Ha! Have it, it's yours! The line, not my voice...it might take an erotic poem to make my voice say yes " Would a ballad suffice? | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice Ha! Have it, it's yours! The line, not my voice...it might take an erotic poem to make my voice say yes Would a ballad suffice? " Try me | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice Ha! Have it, it's yours! The line, not my voice...it might take an erotic poem to make my voice say yes Would a ballad suffice? Try me" Hint hint wink wink... I just posted one on the new voice thread. Catch it soon before I get too embarrassed again | |||
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"I'm losing faith with my doctor at the hospital. I'm not a medical person but I had one in feb. If I can help, send me a msg. I read that as "I'm not a doctor but I fucked one in Feb so maybe I can help" That's some selective reading there Mr Kinky I thought it was a pretty good line. Don't be surprised if you catch me using it in future p.s I'm still marrying your voice Ha! Have it, it's yours! The line, not my voice...it might take an erotic poem to make my voice say yes Would a ballad suffice? Try me Hint hint wink wink... I just posted one on the new voice thread. Catch it soon before I get too embarrassed again " Aaagh need to find the thread. Don't remove It! | |||
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