FabSwingers.com forum: Alopecia

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Bit of a rant really.

I'm being brave and going out with no headwear on as I'm on holiday. I'm amazed at how many people openly stare and don't care how obvious they are being.

Earlier today a lady in her 80's outright asked me why I've lost my hair so I told her and that was that. Tonight a group of young lads had all turned and were openly staring, I just carried on.

I try to brush it off, but tonight has just been too much. I'm wearing my hat tomorrow.

We all are guilty of staring I think, please just be more discreet and take it in turns! Or fucking come and be nice and ask!

That is all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m sorry you’re going through that, and these mindless idiots are being stupid. It’s a very distressing condition for a woman to suffer from. It’s a shame that you can’t go out without being harassed x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m sorry you’re going through that, and these mindless idiots are being stupid. It’s a very distressing condition for a woman to suffer from. It’s a shame that you can’t go out without being harassed x "

Thanks. It's incredibly distressing for a lady to lose her hair ( not saying it's not hard for the men, but nobody seems to stare at a bald man) and people like those earlier just make it harder to live with.

Children staring is expected, adults should know better.

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By *rTall89Man
over a year ago

ipswich

I have a female friend who has alopecia and she does tend to wear a lot of wigs. But that suits her ever changing fashion style.

Sometimes she rocks her natural hair which is fairly short due to the alopecia.

My point is I'm proud of you for going without your hat. Even if it's been a not so delightful experience. You still had the confidence and tried. Don't diminish what you achieved even if you didn't feel so great about it. You still did it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have a female friend who has alopecia and she does tend to wear a lot of wigs. But that suits her ever changing fashion style.

Sometimes she rocks her natural hair which is fairly short due to the alopecia.

I find wearing wigs far too hot, and even hats sometimes especially in the summer, plus trying to find hats to match outfits is difficult. And why should I cover my head? It's just a head, we all have one! (I'm not shouting at you, just making a statement)

I try to be confident but then someone (those lads) so insignificant to me can just destroy the moment with one look.

I guess I'm noticing it because I'm currently in a heavily populated area.

I'm not looking for sympathy, just want to make people aware that staring hurts.

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By *rTall89Man
over a year ago

ipswich

Oh god no I don't think you should have to cover up! I just meant as it gives my friend confidence like I guess your hat does?

"Lads" are often dickheads. People shouldnt stare, it can ruin someone's day like it did yours.

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By *im L FuckitMan
over a year ago

Dumfriesshire

Thanks for sharing, OP... you're brave in more ways than one. I hear what you're saying. Very best wishes and hope you enjoy a relaxing holiday.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've actually met you darling and you're lovely... and very brave and strong so please don't let s few stupid lads knock you sideways xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh god no I don't think you should have to cover up! I just meant as it gives my friend confidence like I guess your hat does?

"Lads" are often dickheads. People shouldnt stare, it can ruin someone's day like it did yours.

I know you didn't mean that lovely, I was just saying in general. Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Thanks for sharing, OP... you're brave in more ways than one. I hear what you're saying. Very best wishes and hope you enjoy a relaxing holiday."

Thank you. Can't wait to get home!! Lol too much food!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've actually met you darling and you're lovely... and very brave and strong so please don't let s few stupid lads knock you sideways xx"

Bless you Pap. Tomorrow is another day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Big hugs lovely head up tits out you are beautiful don't let them win you don't need a bloody hat xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bit of a rant really.

I'm being brave and going out with no headwear on as I'm on holiday. I'm amazed at how many people openly stare and don't care how obvious they are being.

Earlier today a lady in her 80's outright asked me why I've lost my hair so I told her and that was that. Tonight a group of young lads had all turned and were openly staring, I just carried on.

I try to brush it off, but tonight has just been too much. I'm wearing my hat tomorrow.

We all are guilty of staring I think, please just be more discreet and take it in turns! Or fucking come and be nice and ask!

That is all.

Have you thought about just looking back? Maybe, if there's an ounce of sensitivity in them, it may just embarrass them enough to gawp in another direction.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Big hugs lovely head up tits out you are beautiful don't let them win you don't need a bloody hat xx"

Thank you kat. I'm try again tomorrow. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have you thought about just looking back? Maybe, if there's an ounce of sensitivity in them, it may just embarrass them enough to gawp in another direction.

I did, they just carried on staring. I even waved as I passed the window once outside.

It's afterwards when I go over it that I get more... I'm not sure the right word to use.

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

"Bit of a rant really.

I'm being brave and going out with no headwear on as I'm on holiday. I'm amazed at how many people openly stare and don't care how obvious they are being.

Earlier today a lady in her 80's outright asked me why I've lost my hair so I told her and that was that. Tonight a group of young lads had all turned and were openly staring, I just carried on.

I try to brush it off, but tonight has just been too much. I'm wearing my hat tomorrow.

We all are guilty of staring I think, please just be more discreet and take it in turns! Or fucking come and be nice and ask!

That is all.

OP, I actually think people can a bit socially awkward to ask. They might think you have had chemotherapy and lost your hair. That is a tough topic (not saying alopecia isn’t, and probably don’t want to cause offence

I will be honest and say I don’t know much about alopecia, I know it’s hair loss and Gail porter has it. I think it can be stress related and or pregnancy related. Also I believe it can be linked to auto immune diseases but it can very from person to person what the drivers are.

I sometime watch deaf people sign as it’s interesting to learn. I do sign that I am sorry and that I sign a little bit, I try to sign that I am not deaf.

Anyway I hope you feel comfy to leave your hat at home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reckon they were thinking "fucking hell she's gorgeous!!"

Unusual things catch my eye. If I see a lady with very short hair or bald, I'm honestly usually thinking how cool she looks.

There's an advert for a cancer charity at the mo of a lady shaving her head and every time I see it I'm thinking how much she suits her head shaved that short.

No doubt she'd catch me looking and think bad of me but it would be worse if I said she had a fucking awesome head shape.

I realise this sounds dumb, sorry. Just trying to say that even if people do stare, they aren't all doing it in a bad way. xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I sometime watch deaf people sign as it’s interesting to learn. I do sign that I am sorry and that I sign a little bit, I try to sign that I am not deaf.

Anyway I hope you feel comfy to leave your hat at home

Those few that have asked I have thanked them for asking. Maybe people might think it's due to chemo, I don't know. But I have the shadow of hair because I buzz it to 0.8mm so I'm not completely hair free.

You're right there are a few types of alopecia and causes, in my case it's hormone related and the hair I've lost will never grow back and will only ever get worse.

That's great you learned a bit of sign language, I also knew a bit, but now only remember the alphabet. I'm sure your efforts are appreciated. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I reckon they were thinking "fucking hell she's gorgeous!!"

Unusual things catch my eye. If I see a lady with very short hair or bald, I'm honestly usually thinking how cool she looks.

There's an advert for a cancer charity at the mo of a lady shaving her head and every time I see it I'm thinking how much she suits her head shaved that short.

No doubt she'd catch me looking and think bad of me but it would be worse if I said she had a fucking awesome head shape.

I realise this sounds dumb, sorry. Just trying to say that even if people do stare, they aren't all doing it in a bad way. xx"

I get what you're trying to say, it's not dumb. You are right, and I'm lumping everyone in the bad category. Thank you for pointing it out to me. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I reckon they were thinking "fucking hell she's gorgeous!!"

Unusual things catch my eye. If I see a lady with very short hair or bald, I'm honestly usually thinking how cool she looks.

There's an advert for a cancer charity at the mo of a lady shaving her head and every time I see it I'm thinking how much she suits her head shaved that short.

No doubt she'd catch me looking and think bad of me but it would be worse if I said she had a fucking awesome head shape.

I realise this sounds dumb, sorry. Just trying to say that even if people do stare, they aren't all doing it in a bad way. xx

I get what you're trying to say, it's not dumb. You are right, and I'm lumping everyone in the bad category. Thank you for pointing it out to me. Xx"

I'm not trying to downplay how you feel. I hope it hasn't come across that way. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I reckon they were thinking "fucking hell she's gorgeous!!"

Unusual things catch my eye. If I see a lady with very short hair or bald, I'm honestly usually thinking how cool she looks.

There's an advert for a cancer charity at the mo of a lady shaving her head and every time I see it I'm thinking how much she suits her head shaved that short.

No doubt she'd catch me looking and think bad of me but it would be worse if I said she had a fucking awesome head shape.

I realise this sounds dumb, sorry. Just trying to say that even if people do stare, they aren't all doing it in a bad way. xx

I get what you're trying to say, it's not dumb. You are right, and I'm lumping everyone in the bad category. Thank you for pointing it out to me. Xx

I'm not trying to downplay how you feel. I hope it hasn't come across that way. x"

Gosh no not at all. I guess I'm a fairly negative person so for someone to point out another more positive way to me is good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op. We have spoken before about this when I posted a thread about the condition as I to suffer from hair loss. Thinking of you. X.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

It's distressing fur anyone bi know a lady with a school aged son that has alopecia and he suffers terribly with bullying. He is such a lovely young lad. Kind, caring etc but kids can be so mean.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

One of my friends lost all of her hair virtually overnight recently. She is now completely bald.

Initially lots of people assumed she was having chemotherapy. She doesn’t try to hide it. She just brasses it out, lots of pictures on social media etc. In a relatively short time it has become the new normal.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Op. We have spoken before about this when I posted a thread about the condition as I to suffer from hair loss. Thinking of you. X. "

Thank you flower. I appreciate it. Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's distressing fur anyone bi know a lady with a school aged son that has alopecia and he suffers terribly with bullying. He is such a lovely young lad. Kind, caring etc but kids can be so mean. "

Oh the poor little thing, kids can be awful they don't understand the effect bullying has, I can only hope it doesn't affect him into adulthood. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"One of my friends lost all of her hair virtually overnight recently. She is now completely bald.

Oh goodness, virtually overnight?! I can't imagine it happening that quick, it must be devastating for her, mine has been going slowly for about 15 years.

I'm assuming your friends is auto immune related so fingers crossed it will return for her, but I bet she looks amazing, as I do believe not having hair really brings out the facial features.

There is some coverage of alopecia but still a long way to go before people don't bat an eyelid. X

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