FabSwingers.com forum: When you most need affection...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

...it's the worst time to seek it.

Going through a tough patch and it would be so lovely to have a good female friend nearby to snuggle up with (and get lost in her lips, her beautiful big dark eyes, and her soft sensuous passion) from time to time. But I know that neediness for affection just fucks things up.

Stand on your own two feet and you're attractive. Need the help and tenderness of another and it's just the wrong time to be looking for it. Don't you think?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's probably the wrong place to be looking for affection to get you through a tough time too.

If you were a woman, this kinda post falls right in the lap of predatory guys

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...it's the worst time to seek it.

Stand on your own two feet and you're attractive. Need the help and tenderness of another and it's just the wrong time to be looking for it. Don't you think? "

Totally agree.

In shitty place myself at the moment and all i want is a hug. But i am very aware that i have an appauling relationship with sex and attatchment.

So its time to self soothe. Pull on my big sweetmissnaughty pants and feel what i have to process alone xx

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

I agree that this is the worst place to seek affection if you’re feeling needy.

However, what you’re feeling is normal. I’ve been in the position for a while where I’d love a snuggle, one of those kisses just for kissings sake and even a romantic walk hand in hand. Maybe I should hire an escort!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can give you a man hug if you'd like one ?

Hope you feel better soon xox qq

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cuddles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only seem to like affection when I am in a good place

When I am in a bad place, affection or, indeed, attention of any kind is just an added irritant

I am very much a 'I will work through this myself' kinda guy

That's not a brag btw, I do see it as a negative but it is just the way I am.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I completely agree with this, and is exactly where I am too. Hugs xx

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks so much for all the lovely comments

So many people in a similar quandary I suspect all over the world. It's just bizarre that when you most need it that's the worst time to be looking for it.

Luckily my tough time is very much external stuff. Stressful as fuck, but nothing darker. I'll weather through it and put on a brave face. But don't be surprised if you catch me seeking out a few surreptitious cuddles along the way as part of my doctor's orders to de-stress

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get a dog. They hug you and love you and never want to leave.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Its strange you ask this question because ive been doing a lot of thinking over the last year as i have some unanswered questions and one of the questions to myself is why have i never needed affection until now

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Its strange you ask this question because ive been doing a lot of thinking over the last year as i have some unanswered questions and one of the questions to myself is why have i never needed affection until now"

I don't know if anyone could have enough insight to help you solve that conundrum. But I guess we all mellow with age xx

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Here is a virtual hug for you....

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I don't know if anyone could have enough insight to help you solve that conundrum. But I guess we all mellow with age xx"
well my partner thinks he has the answer and ive still got the jury out

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

There is nothing wrong in needing affection, it's a human thing. Looking for it here however is fraught with pitfalls. Affection is too easily misread and even abused.

Try to just be kind to yourself, show yourself some affection. Write some self affirming things down and say them out loud to your reflection in a mirror. "I am a kind person" "I am worth it" "I can get through this, it will pass" " "I will be strong" etc...

Once you begin to come out the other side of your darkness try projecting those thing towards others too. Compliment somebody, smile at somebody serving you in a shop, buy a cup of tea for the homeless guy at the station, congratulate a colleague on something that's going well for them...

You will be surprised how good these things will make you feel.

Be kind and remember to begin with yourself, then others, then reap what you sow. Xx

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

It’s nice to have a snuggle at times. I do have a friend that gives the best hugs when I need them. I’ve cried on his shoulder and he’s listened to me. There are people out there who also want some affection.

You never know what you’ll find on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually think you can get affection from fab. Over the years I've gained some amazing friends both male and female that I can discuss anything with. It doesnt all have to be about sex

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

NO....

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

I would love someone to love me again..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I actually think you can get affection from fab. Over the years I've gained some amazing friends both male and female that I can discuss anything with. It doesnt all have to be about sex "

Definitely.

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now"

I want sex!

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now

I want sex!

I want both

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

NO....

It is, hobnobs make me porky, sex doesn't!!

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By *risky_MareWoman
over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now

I want sex!

I want both

Ha, greedy!

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By *oeofsussexMan
over a year ago

Eastbourne

I have three pussies - with real fur coats! But true, they don’t really make up for a real woman! Some of the best sex I’ve had is with women who have either been helping me through a rough patch or vice versa. Guess it’s when sex has that extra element of really caring - sex almost becomes an altruistic act. No egos - nothing to prove - just trying to give the other the most enjoyable time you can! And there are so many gorgeous women out there who need cheering up! And, so I’ve learnt, by a nice long relaxed shag!

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By *oeofsussexMan
over a year ago

Eastbourne

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now

I want sex!

I want both

Ha, greedy!

I’m not greedy!

I don’t need the hobknobs!

But I do need both the chocolate and the sex! NOW!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...it's the worst time to seek it.

Stand on your own two feet and you're attractive. Need the help and tenderness of another and it's just the wrong time to be looking for it. Don't you think? "

Oh boy. That's just how I feel right now but with a man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I need sex

I need sex.... I need it now

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By *oeofsussexMan
over a year ago

Eastbourne

"I need sex

I need sex.... I need it now

Think you’re in very good company here! So do we all!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only time I ever hired a prostitute was for a fully clothed cuddle when I was really really down.

Sort of worked.

Hope you get back on the right road soon OP.

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By *ot-AshMan
over a year ago

London

sending you a virtual man hug OP.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

" Not necessarily...sex is a better substitute than chocolate hobnobs I reckon!

I want chocolate Hobnobs now

I want sex!

I want both

I want both too... Hobnobs are easier to get

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

I hope you feel better today

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By *im L FuckitMan
over a year ago

Dumfriesshire

"Get a dog. They hug you and love you and never want to leave.

This

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

I disagree op. When you know that you need affection, it is perfectly healthy to have it. It's not about not taking responsibility, as you can still address the causes of your distress, where possible, but about looking after yourself . People are social animals and benefit from giving and receiving care with others. This may or may not include affection but of you know that you need it, it's silly lol deny yourself having healthy care.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know ecactly what you mean OP

Sending hugs x

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By *onny69sMan
over a year ago

Donny

I'm in the same place at the minute. I would love a hug, cuddle, spooning etc.

Even just an adult to talk to would be good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...it's the worst time to seek it.

Stand on your own two feet and you're attractive. Need the help and tenderness of another and it's just the wrong time to be looking for it. Don't you think? "

Not at all, my partner and I found ea h other when we were both in exactly that position. I love her being needy, and I love playing up to it.

Just need the right partner, but you can have her, I just lend her out for short periods.lol.

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