FabSwingers.com forum: Cream tea: jam first or you’re a wrong ‘un

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’m right, aren’t I?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or yes. Cause I am a wrong ‘un

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

Always jam first

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Or yes. Cause I am a wrong ‘un"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.....unless you're Cornish....in which case you're definitely a wrong un!

It's a DEVON cream tea.....and in Devon it's always clotted cream first....think of it like the 'butter'....then jam on top

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No.....unless you're Cornish....in which case you're definitely a wrong un!

It's a DEVON cream tea.....and in Devon it's always clotted cream first....think of it like the 'butter'....then jam on top"

^^ got ourselves a wrong ‘un right here!!

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

Yep, cream first, jam on top (Devon blood coming out!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always jam first, spread it across then a big dollop of cream on top

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Always jam first

I always knew you were alright! Spot on!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yep, cream first, jam on top (Devon blood coming out!)"

*shakes head disapprovingly!*

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Always jam first, spread it across then a big dollop of cream on top "

exactly!!

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By *esmond and Molly JonesCouple
over a year ago

Watford

Embarrassingly, when I was on holiday on the IOW years ago staying with some friends, I saw a sign saying "cream teas here" and I thought it was tea with cream in instead of milk, and I commented how I didn't mind it in coffee but it would be horrible in tea.

They both fell about laughing that I thought a cream tea was tea with cream in it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or yes. Cause I am a wrong ‘un

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

"Yep, cream first, jam on top (Devon blood coming out!)

*shakes head disapprovingly!*

But if you do jam first, the cream then slithers about and drops off (on the table, down your clothes). The Devon way makes this less likely because the slippery cream is kind of anchored to the crumb of the scone

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Embarrassingly, when I was on holiday on the IOW years ago staying with some friends, I saw a sign saying "cream teas here" and I thought it was tea with cream in instead of milk, and I commented how I didn't mind it in coffee but it would be horrible in tea.

They both fell about laughing that I thought a cream tea was tea with cream in it!"

I had a similar misunderstanding with “blow jobs” as a young un .. assumed it was literal and you’d end up inflated like a balloon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or yes. Cause I am a wrong ‘un"

Now then....a Scottish cream tea.....is that deep fried???

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By *tonMessCouple
over a year ago

Slough Windsor ish

Jam first, always

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jam first, always"

someone who knows their stuff!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Marmalade, no cream?

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

I've never had a problem spreading my jam I'll have you know!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.....unless you're Cornish....in which case you're definitely a wrong un!

It's a DEVON cream tea.....and in Devon it's always clotted cream first....think of it like the 'butter'....then jam on top"

I’m a janner too and although I agree with you, I’m a wrong un and do it the Cornish way...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jam first, always

someone who knows their stuff! "

If anyone here knew their stuff then they would know that it is originally from Devon and they do it cream first. It’s the Cornish that fucked it up

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

Jam first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jam first

Agreed

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

You already know my view on this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

I don’t eat cream so it’s jam on its own for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It doesn't matter to me, just give me the damn tea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback! "

Oh now you must start a bareback thread, it’s been ages since we have had a decent thread about this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

Oh now you must start a bareback thread, it’s been ages since we have had a decent thread about this!

Really? Surely there must be one running already?!!

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

I've never had a problem spreading my jam I'll have you know!! "

Frozen cream or liquid jam are the only explanation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always jam first!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got to be jam first, can’t spread jam on cream x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

I've never had a problem spreading my jam I'll have you know!!

Frozen cream or liquid jam are the only explanation

Clotted cream is pretty thick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But always jam first, so you can get three inches of cream on top

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Jam first it’s the civilised way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback! "

It’s an important topic!!

If the roll / cob / barmcake thread can get another airing then I thought it’s only fair the jam first one did too (I didn’t want it feeling left out!!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

I've never had a problem spreading my jam I'll have you know!!

Frozen cream or liquid jam are the only explanation

Clotted cream is pretty thick"

Only with the crust intact

At room temps minus crust, it's just thickish yellow cream incapable of supporting jam.

Take it from a cremeologist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's got to be jam first.

Basic rules of physics surely?

How on earth do you spread lumpy thick jam on soft cream.

Try telling that to La Fee Verte and her cwazy slippery jam justification!!

I've never had a problem spreading my jam I'll have you know!!

Frozen cream or liquid jam are the only explanation

Clotted cream is pretty thick

Only with the crust intact

At room temps minus crust, it's just thickish yellow cream incapable of supporting jam.

Take it from a cremeologist."

two words that make me shudder,crust and clotted. Seems a shame they are involved in the deliciousness of cream teas

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam. "

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine. "

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton

It’s cream first!! Bloody heathens!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

It’s an important topic!!

If the roll / cob / barmcake thread can get another airing then I thought it’s only fair the jam first one did too (I didn’t want it feeling left out!!)

These are the important questions of our era!

Well, just to be safe, henceforth I shall have one half of my scone with the jam on the bottom and the other half with the cream on top.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

It’s an important topic!!

If the roll / cob / barmcake thread can get another airing then I thought it’s only fair the jam first one did too (I didn’t want it feeling left out!!)

These are the important questions of our era!

Well, just to be safe, henceforth I shall have one half of my scone with the jam on the bottom and the other half with the cream on top. "

I see what you did there!

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By *alking DisasterWoman
over a year ago

South Oxfordshire

I lived in Devon for six months, but I would still say jam first.

Although, I prefer it without the cream at all - I'm not a fan of clotted cream.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas.

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas. "

Butter !!!

Salted or unsalted ?

English, Danish, French. ?

Surely this is a whole new thread ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas. "

Butter as well? Nah that’s SO wrong!!

There’s an excellent pasty shop down yonder very near the border that sells both Cornish and Devonshire pasties, both are equally palatable but the styles are different!

As an honorary Cornishman (parents have been there for years and years) then of course I have to err on the side of the Cornish!

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By *ex-a-frolicsCouple
over a year ago

Brizzle

"I’m right, aren’t I?

If we agreed with you we’d both be wrong!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh has to be jam first then cream

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

yeah but one way (cream first) is wrong, the other way is right! Surely you want things to be done properly!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m right, aren’t I?

If we agreed with you we’d both be wrong!!"

Or right!? I’m confused!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

yeah but one way (cream first) is wrong, the other way is right! Surely you want things to be done properly!!"

Chicken & egg comes to mind here

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

"Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

I sense a lack of commitment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas.

Butter as well? Nah that’s SO wrong!!

There’s an excellent pasty shop down yonder very near the border that sells both Cornish and Devonshire pasties, both are equally palatable but the styles are different!

As an honorary Cornishman (parents have been there for years and years) then of course I have to err on the side of the Cornish!

Never heard of a Devonshire pasty, no such thing. It’s a Cornish pasty and that’s it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I do the jam 1st, can’t remember it’s been ages since I had a cream tea!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

I sense a lack of commitment

Pretty much

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By *umpsimusMan
over a year ago

Camberley

"Other than being from Devon or Cornwall ,don’t give a rat’s arse what way round

I sense a lack of commitment

Pretty much

Where's the moderator when they're needed ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas.

Butter as well? Nah that’s SO wrong!!

There’s an excellent pasty shop down yonder very near the border that sells both Cornish and Devonshire pasties, both are equally palatable but the styles are different!

As an honorary Cornishman (parents have been there for years and years) then of course I have to err on the side of the Cornish!

Never heard of a Devonshire pasty, no such thing. It’s a Cornish pasty and that’s it. "

Poochiepoo!! Call yourself a Devonian!

Much like the jam or cream first debate, there’s a Cornwall v Devon pasty crimp debate!!

Some say that a Cornish pasty is oval in shape and crimped along the side, whereas a Devon pasty has a top crimp and tends to be oval in shape! So much so that Cornish bakers using the top crimp can’t legally call their pasties Cornish! (even though there is evidence the top crimp did originate in Cornwall!)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas.

Butter as well? Nah that’s SO wrong!!

There’s an excellent pasty shop down yonder very near the border that sells both Cornish and Devonshire pasties, both are equally palatable but the styles are different!

As an honorary Cornishman (parents have been there for years and years) then of course I have to err on the side of the Cornish!

Never heard of a Devonshire pasty, no such thing. It’s a Cornish pasty and that’s it.

Poochiepoo!! Call yourself a Devonian!

Much like the jam or cream first debate, there’s a Cornwall v Devon pasty crimp debate!!

Oops typo above! Cornish are semi-circular in shape with a side crimp, Devon oval!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam.

Oh, thank goodness you've turned up. I was feeling very outnumbered here

I don't understand all the befuddlement over cream first - proper West Country clotted cream *does* support jam just fine.

I’m from plymouth so know the ‘proper job’ way

Plymouth’s almost Cornwall anyway, isn’t it? Just a quick hop over the Tamar Bridge, you’re as good as Cornish, so Jam First, surely!?!

I eat it like that because I put butter on also. So butter, jam then cream. If I don’t have butter then I have cream then jam.

Cornish is not the original way, they have pasties not cream teas.

Butter as well? Nah that’s SO wrong!!

There’s an excellent pasty shop down yonder very near the border that sells both Cornish and Devonshire pasties, both are equally palatable but the styles are different!

As an honorary Cornishman (parents have been there for years and years) then of course I have to err on the side of the Cornish!

Never heard of a Devonshire pasty, no such thing. It’s a Cornish pasty and that’s it.

Poochiepoo!! Call yourself a Devonian!

Much like the jam or cream first debate, there’s a Cornwall v Devon pasty crimp debate!!

Oops typo above! Cornish are semi-circular in shape with a side crimp, Devon oval!

I’ve only ever had a top crimped pasty once and it wasn’t the same. I prefer the ‘miner’ style pasty, half savoury/half sweet and eaten with filthy mitts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FFS!! I’ve just realised I was down in Plymouth for 3 days at the weekend and didn’t have one cream tea!!

Defo jam first though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.....unless you're Cornish....in which case you're definitely a wrong un!

It's a DEVON cream tea.....and in Devon it's always clotted cream first....think of it like the 'butter'....then jam on top"

No no no, the cream is like the icing!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cream first, jam on top

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By *eplicant JoWoman
over a year ago

Sussex countryside

Jam first

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Jam first!! I don't care if that's right or wrong either

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Jam first!! I don't care if that's right or wrong either

It’s ok, LL, ‘cos that’s RIGHT!

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Jam first.

There is no need for further discussion.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

"Jam first!! I don't care if that's right or wrong either

It’s ok, LL, ‘cos that’s RIGHT!

Phew!!

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

What does it matter really when it’s all going down the same hole

It won’t taste any different

Xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What does it matter really when it’s all going down the same hole

It won’t taste any different

Xxxx"

Sooooo naive!!

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

But honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always jam first, then the cream follows.

Just think of it like sex, you enjoy the foreplay, as in getting fruity, then the cream is the finishing off.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback! "

And always started by the OP he’s obsessed with cream tea

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By *p4funCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Its jam first ....lets hear no more about it !

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

I cut mine in half, do each half different and then put them together

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

And always started by the OP he’s obsessed with cream tea

Yeah, but it’s definitely jam first, right!?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got to be jam first, can’t spread jam on cream x "

Exactly this..from a logistics point of view it has to be cream on jam, not jam on cream. Jam being heavier and more dense than cream it would just sink in and not smooooosh around as required.

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

"There must have been more threads on this subject than one's about Bareback!

And always started by the OP he’s obsessed with cream tea

Yeah, but it’s definitely jam first, right!?

Hell yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got to be jam first, can’t spread jam on cream x

Exactly this..from a logistics point of view it has to be cream on jam, not jam on cream. Jam being heavier and more dense than cream it would just sink in and not smooooosh around as required.

Why did the inventors of the cream tea (devonians) create it like that then? Jam sits perfectly well on top of cream.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got to be jam first, can’t spread jam on cream x

Exactly this..from a logistics point of view it has to be cream on jam, not jam on cream. Jam being heavier and more dense than cream it would just sink in and not smooooosh around as required.

Why did the inventors of the cream tea (devonians) create it like that then? Jam sits perfectly well on top of cream. "

They’ve always been a little bit odd those Devonians! It doesn’t surprise me at all that they’d invent something the wrong way, thankfully the Cornish were there to put it right!

xxxx

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"I’m right, aren’t I?

I assume that we are talking about pasties ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I live in Devon and it’s cream 1st then jam. "

I live in Yorkshire and it’s still always cream first ??

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Can't stand cream, so it is large and jam for me.

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